Chapter 1

Elena

It happens slowly and then it is over in an instant. The vehicle swerved and hit the fence, then there was a moment of slow weightlessness as it flew through the air: suspended time. As if waking up from a dream, the car hit the water and panic ensued. But she wasn't worried about her life, it seemed like her time had been up so frequently in the past, that the end was inevitable. She immediately turned towards the friend she had once shared a crib with, the one whose heart she did not mean to break.

He had been knocked out from the impact, and as water began to increasingly fill the car, she shook him and cried his name begging him to wake up. Trying everything she could to save him, breaking the glass, opening the door, nothing seemed to work. Within seconds the car was completely full of water and they were in the bottom of the river. That was when she saw Stefan approach the door, rip the door apart, and swim over Matt to save her...but she knew he would listen to her. She pointed to Matt, demanded that he save him, and the moment she saw that Matt was safe, water completely filled her lungs, and there was nothing.

Things never work out the way they should, not in her life. Waking up shouldn't have been an option. She was okay with finding peace, whatever that may be or look like. But he saved her, just as he always had, and just as he always promised. His hand used to graze her cheek, and brush the hair that fell into her face, and their eyes would meet. And that was all she needed.

She had been told to go to the service they held. She was supposed to let go and move on with life, that is what people had been telling her. "Drink some tea, Elena." "Get out of bed, Elena." "Enroll in some classes, Elena." "Eat, Elena." "Stop crying, Elena." "Get over it, Elena." "Let go, Elena." ...their voices a mashed up blur in her mind. One demand after the next, but she refused any order to be okay. She didn't want any fake attempt at comforting her with tea and vodka.

She didn't even feel bad about it anymore. The morning of the service, Caroline had come into her room of the foreclosed house they had just taken up residence in, wearing a new black dress with a slight triangle cut out just at her waist. "You can never have too many black dresses in Mystic Falls," she had once said.

A fake smile plastered on her face veiled with a combination of disgust and what appeared to be genuine concern. "Elena you need to go. You have to have some closure over that part of your life," she paused looking at the state of her room, and ignoring the piles of clothes on the floor and the coffee cups that lined her nightstand, "I went shopping and I saw this dress that I think would really look nice on you, for today."

Caroline began to unzip the black bag that surrounded the coat hanger to reveal the dress. It was a short sleeveless black dress with lace overlay, she had worn a similar one before with her hair in a fish tale side braid...tears began to fill her eyes. She quickly turned her head, "You have done your duty as best friend. You can go now."

Stefan was the only one that she hadn't seen since that night. From what she could hear while lying in bed, he had been the one to take care of arrangements for the funeral and made sure that Damon was buried in the Salvatore family plot. So, she was actually surprised when he was the next person to come to her door on that horrible morning.

"Elena..." he said with a condescending look on his face that she began to hate after Jeremy had died.

"What? What is it Stefan?"

"You need to go. Damon would want you to start healing, and find peace..."

Before he could finish his words, Elena ran out of bed and taking him by surprise, and with one swift motion, snapped his neck, and his body fell to the floor. She pulled his body outside her door, and slammed it shut. Shutting out the world...shutting out her life...she crawled back into bed.

There was a knock at her door. When she didn't respond, Alaric called out to her, asking if he could come in. She got up and opened the door. He was wearing a suit and a concerned expression. Preparing herself for what he was about to say, or possibly echo, she took a deep breath.

"I moved Stefan to the couch. He got up 20 minutes ago, so..." he paused. "Elena, I understand why you don't want to go to the service. If it wasn't for Jeremy, I don't think I would go either."

Looking down at her hands, she began to play with her nails, picking off the clear gel manicure that she had gotten so many weeks ago. "How's Jer?"

"He's dealing the best way he can. Tyler and Matt have been taking him out for the past couple of nights. Bonnie's service was yesterday. Her mother wanted me to tell you that she understands."

Still concentrating on her hands she said, "Does she..." she paused trying to formulate her next words. "Does she know what happened to the other side?"

"Elena, I didn't ask her. She's a vampire, we were at her daughter's funeral, it just didn't seem like the right time."

Placing her hands on her lap, for the first time, she looked up at Ric. "But she could know something about what happened. Wouldn't she want to get her daughter back?" She said, searching his eyes for some understanding.

"Dammit, I should have gone so I could ask her, or get her to tell me something. She has to know, Ric. They had to have gone somewhere. He isn't dead. He isn't gone...he was everything...and my everything...my everything didn't just disappear. He is not dead."

Crumbling under the weight of her words, tears began to flow uncontrollably. Alaric immediately took Elena in his arms and held her as she cried into his suit jacket.

"It's okay to have hope, Elena. Sometimes that's the only thing we have left."

Two weeks later

She took a deep breath and turned over, folding her pillow in half, trying to reposition herself. One leg out of the covers, one leg in...then both legs out, and she turned on her other side...then she put both legs back under her blanket and just stared at the ceiling. She was a tornado.

She looked at the clock, 3:43 AM. Sighing, she got out of bed and pulled on her Nike black leggings and a purple sleeveless running top. She reached into her closet and grabbed a backpack. It wasn't the same type of backpack she used for school, it was one meant for hiking and withstanding the elements. Opening a dresser drawer, she put in a sweatshirt, jeans, the converse sneakers Jer had bought her a few days ago, and a couple of long sleeved henley tops. Then crawling over to her bed, she reached in between the mattress and pulled out a 4 stacks of bills and put them in her back pack. Finally, she went to the bathroom, reaching above the toilet, opening the cabinet she carefully pulled out the rolls of toilet paper until she found Bonnie's grimoire.

Replacing everything as it was, she tucked the book safely in her back pack. Taking one last look in the mirror above her dresser, she brushed her hands through her hair and pulled it back into a sloppy bun. Elena looked into her brown eyes, that seemed to have gotten darker with time, and not moving, but staring directly into her self.

She then looked down into the bowl she kept her earrings and necklaces and pulled out a long silver chain with keys connected by a brass ring. It was the only thing left that she had from that night. Liz had come by shortly after Damon's funeral and gave them to her. She had never seen Liz cry, but when she handed Elena the keys to Damon's Camaro, the only words she could get out was, "I know."

Elena placed the necklace around her neck, so the keys rested just above her heart. Throwing a jacket on over her top, and placing the backpack around her shoulders, she quickly ran downstairs and out of the house that was never really a home.

XXXXX

Damon

He rolled over, and with his eyes still closed, he outstretched his arms searching for someone that was supposed to be by his side. Realizing no one was there, he groaned until he suddenly heard a familiar voice. "Daddy...Daddy...wake up! Mommy made pancakes for you."

He opened his eyes to see Jack looking back at him, about 3 inches from his face. He had his mother's olive skin, but he inherited his Dad's piercing blue eyes. Damon picked Jack up and placed him right next to him in his bed. "What else did Mommy make us?" he said as he kissed Jack on the cheek.

Giggling Jack screamed, "Daddy, you're all itchy."

It wasn't until she walked into the room, that Damon looked up. Having recently gotten back from a run, her face was still a little flushed. She had a red checked apron tied around her waist over her Nike leggings and purple sleeveless top. Her chestnut brown hair was tied in a sloppy bun, with strands falling into her face.

She was holding a tray, and as she walked towards him she said, "Jack! What is the point of surprising your father on his birthday, if you are going to ruin the surprise?"

She placed the tray of fluffy banana pancakes, applewood smoked bacon, a small cravat of maple syrup, and fresh squeezed orange juice, down over his lap. A red rose was in a small white porcelain vase, next to a card. Jack must have made the card this morning, but Elena couldn't help but draw a few hearts in the corner of the card that read, "Happy Birthday to the bestest Daddy in the whole entire universe". Of course, Jack had to add his own drawings of aliens and space ships. He was going through a Star Wars phase, insisting on watching the movies over and over, which he didn't mind all that much.

Elena bent over, tenderly and swiftly kissing him on the lips. Not completely satisfied with the quick peck, he dramatically pulled her down, and kissed her...she tasted a wonderful combination of bacon and sweat. And she giggled as Jack yelled, "Ewww" and ran out of the room.

Once released, she sat next to him and took a drink of his orange juice. She looked at him, studied his face for a moment and almost whispered, "Are you happy?"

He brushed the few strands of hair out of her face, and smiled. "I am happy."