Disease and Disaster

by BlackDracoGothStar09

Draco, Hermione, Harry, and Ron go on a vacation to Mexico and meet up with some new friends. They soon learn that this trip will be different from all the rest.....

A/N: Hey all you peoples. If you have ever read Doxology of Dragons-and actually liked it-then you'll be very pleased to know that two of the three people who are writing this are Double Trouble, the authors of D.O.D. The other person is our best friend and beta reader. All three of use got drunk one day and decided that it would be fun to write a fanfic about the crazy things that would happen if the four coolest characters in the books took a little 'road trip' to our 'native homeland' (heehee). Okay, so it's not really our 'native homeland' but since we are Hispanic it's close enough. Don't worry about the Spanish words in there; if we didn't translate them, then they weren't important. So here it is. Hope you like



*~ Prologue ~*

The archeologists were pleased. After a week of excavation with nothing to show for their pains except sweaty faces, dirty hands, and sore backs, one of the junior excavators came across a panel in the main chamber of one of the Aztec pyramids. Perhaps this would finally give them the information that they needed to determine how the pyramids were actually made.

Over 25 archeologists gathered around the panel as the head director of the excavation went up to it. They all held their breath as she pushed it in. Suddenly-from above and then from all around them-they heard bricks moving, sliding against each other. The whole wall that held the panel slid back. Everyone was trying to get passed the door to the sunlight outside. The top of the massive pyramid fell away, crushing most of the archeologists. They would later be considered the lucky ones.

As the remaining survivors made a mad scramble to the door, it closed, locking itself and sending everyone into frenzy. But suddenly, an improbable silence fell upon them. The pounding of their own hearts was all that could be heard--until the sound of bricks sliding against each other filled the huge room, bouncing off of the walls and drilling into their skulls.

But as a massive shadow descended upon them, all other thoughts were reciprocated by ones of death and fear. They caught a glimpse of glowing red eyes and spotted fur before a surge of hot, putrid air crashed into them. The next instant, screams filled the chamber as people once human scrambled about the room, clutching at melted flesh on their faces with hands that belonged to the departed of over fifty years. Their screams of grueling pain and intense terror lasted for days, echoing off the stonewalls even after their owners had passed on.

The creature feasted on the dead carcasses of the mutilated bodies, reveling in the first meal it had had in over 1 million years. When it finished, it began searching for a way out. Out to the moonlight that cloaked it's deadly body in blackness, to the sound of children screaming in terror. To the unbroken cries of mothers weeping and holding disfigured babies in their arms.

Out to the pure terror and unthinkable pain it would inflict upon the world as it slowly killed the creatures that had taken it away from it's home. That had tried to subdue it, not knowing that you could not tame a creature of Satan himself.

***

In the depths of the jungle, the distant sound of thunder resonated in the clear, blue sky, heard by only one. As the sound reached its potential target, it grew louder, awakening another creature from its deep slumber of ten centuries. The creature woke willingly enough, knowing what had stirred it awake--ready to kill it and sleep once more.

***

Draco almost walked into Harry as he headed to the Great Hall. "What the . . "

"Rise and Shine" peeped Harry in a high pitch voice, sarcastically mimicking Draco's 'morning-hating'.

"I'll rise, but I won't shine"

"That's the spirit" Harry retaliated as they entered the hall and went their separate ways.

Draco sat down next to Millicent Bullstrode and Pansy Parkinson when he reached the Gryffindor table. It was not exactly his best choice, but at this point he had to sit next people that would not string him fiber by fiber at sight. Crabbe and Goyle had recently found out about his new friendship with Harry Potter and his dynamic duo. They had threatened to 'crush' Draco if they ever saw him with them again. But Draco, being Draco, knew that nobody, no one, especially not

the freaks from the south, told Draco what or what not to do.

He had Crabbe and Goyle straightened by promising to grate them, string them, take off their skin and wear them as a cloak if ever they dared to publicize his and Harry's new amity. And of course he promised to announce to all of Hogwarts how Crabbe and Goyle had their 'secret meetings' behind the astronomy tower every Saturday, and how Goyle kept a picture of Crabbe under his pillow throughout the Christmas when he left.

"Hey, baby, how'd you sleep last night? " shrilled Pansy giving him a deviously provocative look.

"Quite fine, thank you" responded Draco, trying hard not to smirk at Pansy's incredibly low cut shirt that she was sporting under her robes. But what a coincidence that her front robe was open, could it be possible be she wanted him to look there? Hmm. . . He thought.

"Heeey Draco" said Millicent in what appeared to be an 'I -want- you- to - think- I- am- sexy voice.

"Hello Milli"

"Ooohh, I love it when you call me that"

****

Harry sat next to the people that he had sat next to the past six years, Ron and Hermione. Ron was engaged in a conversation with Katie Bell about the Chudley Canons, and Hermione as usual, was reading a book, but not any book, it was a book all about Mexico. Harry was eased to see that Hermione had taken the time to do what he had asked; it was something that was going

to take everyone by surprise, well.. hopefully.

"Hey, guys" he said as he sat down and immediately began filling his plate with scrambled eggs and bacon.



"Hallo" they both said as they both continued to engage in their own doings.

Hermione quietly leaned in towards Harry, making sure that Ron couldn't hear, "Harry, I've got everything fixed, when are you going to announce it to Draco and Ron?"

"Seven. Bring Ron to our usual place, I'll tell Draco."

****

The corridors were dark and very drafty, the click of Draco's boots, made Draco cringe at the sound that might awake Ms. Norris. As soon as Draco reached that statue of the witch burning at the stake, Draco knocked twice on her foot and headed into the passageway that appeared before him.

It had been a long time since Draco had remembered the first time he had ever traveled down this passageway with Harry, Hermione and Ron. It had been in 4th year, when Harry Potter had saved his life. It was something that Draco thought would have never believe had happened to him. It was the year that the dark lord was vanquished, only to reappear and take on the son of his most trusted death eater, Lucious Malfoy.

Draco had been taken, beaten, and lashed, to be used as a mercurial for a very powerful necromancy spell that needed human sacrifice. Harry had appeared to destroy Voldemort once in for all, and by doing this he had managed to save Draco's life. This was three years ago, but Draco will never forget the words that Harry Potter told Voldemort just before he killed him,

"There are things that are considered evil, things that are considered abominations in the eyes of

others, things that will never be forgotten in the history of earth. But what you have done deserves no pardon; no cage to hold you, no magic or power can ever make you regret the lives you have taken from others. I will not keep you alive to make you suffer, for that would be to disgrace and putrefy this very planet, I want you to die, I want you to feel what those felt when you killed them, and I hope that if indeed there is life after death, you go to a place where you will burn eternally."

Those words will stay with Draco forever. He shook the thoughts from his head as he walked into the room where he found Hermione, Ron and Harry sitting on the furniture that was in the room. Hermione had drastically changed from the past years that he had known her. She was now a woman of seventeen. She had bright blue eyes that were constantly running over the words of her books, since of course it was Hermione. Her hair was made into beautifully neat waves that

fell to her back, thanks to a charm that she had developed for her personal use. She later confessed to Draco that she had done it because the bottle had been way too much of a fuss to put on and off.

Ron had stayed about the same height of a staggering six feet for the past two years. But had developed into such a lady killer, that even Pansy had to stop from diverting her eyes over to the Gryffindor table, where you could almost always find Ron surrounded by a pack of flirtatious girls.

"Your late" said Ron as he saw Draco in the room.

"Calm down, hot-head, what are you my mother?"

"Settle down boys, you all know what you're here for," said Hermione standing up and brushing her robes.

For the past three years Harry and the clan took a yearly trip the coolest places in the world. Ron remembered the time when they visited the Hanging Gardens of Babylon, which all the muggles think are gone, or at the worse just be plain myth, they just don't know where to look. Or the time when they visited the great temples of India and the wizard academy that taught how to speak and handle magical snakes. When at last Voldemort had been relinquished, the speaking of parsletongue had been allowed to be spoken. But it seemed to Ron, that this trip, since it would be their last year in Hogwarts, was going to be different, extremely different.

"For the past years we have been going to all these wicked places, and I would like to hear if anyone has any suggestions for this year's trip"

"How about we take a trip to all the wizarding striping clubs around England?" said a cock-eyed Ron.

"No, no, already did that" responded Draco, who was very casually lying down over the overstuffed chair.

Hermione just lowered her head and slowly nodded "No, comment"

"As much as I would love to do that engaging trip, I have a better idea"

"Oh, do please tell us Merlin," said Draco who had his arm over his eyes.

"I plan to make our trip a little more challenging; I want to go where no wizard has ever gone before. " Continued Harry.

"Where? Down Hermione's pants?" interrupted Draco.

Ron burst into what appeared to be an attack of laughter, and Harry heard Hermione distinctly say 'and this is what you get for hanging out with a bunch of guys'.

"Anyways, where do you want to go?" asked Hermione, even though she already knew the answer but was trying desperately to distract Ron from his laugh- attack.

"This year's trip I want to go to Mexico."

"Yeah, okay, Mexico. What's so special about that? I hear they have killer beaches, and you do know what killer beached always come with, right?"

"Apart from that, here's the eminent part, I'm making a bet.."

"Psshh, I already won" obstructed Draco.

"Would you let me finish?"

"Go, on go on" Draco responded waving his hand in the air, indicating Harry to continue.

"The bet is to do everything the muggle way."

Draco instantly sat upright. "What? I'm sorry I must have misheard."

"No you didn't. The trick is to do everything the muggle way, traveling by cars, planes, eating their weird 'fast-food', learning how to use a telephone, well at least you and Ron. "

"What? Easy for you to say! You lived with a muggle family for a long time!"

Ron had suddenly gone very quite. He knew that he wouldn't stand a chance against the muggle world, vaguely remembering the time where he tried calling Harry in 3rd year. But that was not going to stop him from doing this bet, even if it did mean reading Hermione's 'Muggle-Studies' book. Bloody hell! Why hadn't he paid attention when his dad brought all the weird muggle crap to the house!!!

"What? To scarred Malfoy? Aren't wizard enough to go a little wand-less?" said Harry trying to convince Draco. "Are you up to it Ron?"

"Yeah, I'm in"

"Wait, wait. You never said wand-less magic! You mean no wands?! Harry I'm not stupid enough to go wand-less into some foreign country"

"No, no, of course not wand-less magic, it was just a figure of speech." he said clarifying things to a strained Hermione, who at all chances would pounce at defending her ideas.

"So what about you Draco?"

"What about me? I'm a Malfoy I take all chances, and conquer at all."

"I take that as a yes" said Hermione laughing at Draco's stubbornness.

"Then it's settled then, we have ourselves a deal"



****

"Are you kidding? You want me to get into that thing?!" As the four of them descended the stairs and caught sight of the car that would take them to the London airport, Draco's voice broke the silence. Ron groaned.

"What's wrong, Malfoy? Not humble enough to ride with the rest of us? Does that mean that you lose already?" He smiled.

Draco looked at him, slightly flustered. "No....no, I just thought that we were going to get over there by floo powder or something."

Hermione looked at him, "Now Malfoy, you know that we were going to do this all the muggle way."

Draco gave her a look of disgust. "Yeah, but I thought we'd start at the air-thingy or something."

Harry walked ahead of them, not looking back, "There is no way to get to the airport by floo powder. And you have to watch yourself when you get there-I doubt there will be any witches or wizards with all the muggles.

Draco sighed as they got to the car. Everyone got into the car, the chauffeurs putting their luggage in the back and soon the four of them were on their way to London Airport.

The trip was, to say the least, completely new to Draco. He had never been in a muggle car before and it wasn't as bad as he had thought (although he still thought that the wizard's way was quicker and easier). He was mesmerized at how slow the things went by compared to the knight bus-and stared at all the people dressed so normally as they went through the streets. Everyone laughed at the small things that made Draco gape in wonder, but he secretly saw Ron staring amazedly at everything, too.



Hermione alerted everyone when they got within seeing range of the airport by emitting a tiny, high pitched shriek, making Draco look away from the two people he saw riding weird contraptions with two big metal wheels down the street.

"Look, look, there it is, its right there, do you see it? Do you? Huh? It's right there I can't believe you can't see it. Look!! Ohhhh,...its so pretty."

"Granger, if we didn't see it, I'm sure your announcement would have made us at least pretend if only to shut you up. I mean, for God's sakes why don't you pull out a trumpet. Maybe it'll draw less attention."

The last part was true. Draco had rolled down the windows to let the air in and as they had slowed at a traffic light, people had started staring. "Listen, Draco Malfoy. This is probably going to be the last place I go for a long time! Do you know how long it took me to convince my parents about this?!? And I'll be damned if I'm going to let you-"

"It's an airport!! If the muggle world were a game show I would probably have to buy a vowel and I still don't get excited about airports!!"

"Both of you shut up!! I'm not about to have my vacation ruined by you two, alright!?!"

The car suddenly got very quiet. There was something scary when Harry Potter yelled that made you think that you should just sit down and do as he said, or else you'd be sorry. Five not-so-happy minutes later, the four of them were standing at the automatic doors to the airport. They're luggage next to them and the car that they came in zooming out the parking lot.

"...So...shall we?..." Harry made a gesture with his hand and smiled, not being able to help it.

Everyone else seemed to catch his excitement.

Smiling, too, Hermione looked at him. "Yes. I think we shall." And the two walked through the doors together, leaving Draco and Ron standing outside.

"...Do you think, maybe, the doors ate them?.." Ron asked quietly.

The two big doors had opened once Harry and Hermione had gotten close to them and had closed once they had walked through.

"Don't be a prick, Weasley, of course not....They just....disappeared through them...never to be seen again..."

"How 'bout we find another way in? Maybe one that doesn't involve going through doors that look like they could kill someone?"

"I think I've heard about doors like these," Draco said walking up close to one and circling the pad on the floor.

"Maybe if we--"

The doors opened suddenly and Harry came out. He grabbed a hold of Ron and Draco and pulled them inside the airport. Once inside it took Hermione almost an hour to get Ron, Draco and Harry to the right gate. First, everyone seemed mesmerized by the gift shops.

Draco and Ron wanted to know what all the stuff in there was and Harry wanted to buy all the candy. After dragging the others to the luggage drop off, Hermione had to be plundered with questions like 'Why can't we stop and look here?' and 'Why can't we eat there?'. When Hermione had practically gone crazy trying to get to the right gate. She dragged the

three boys all over the airport, bringing more attention to her than she would have wanted.

Harry finally made her stop and ask for help from a big, burly, man with a patch over his eye. After giving them directions to the gate, the man broke into tap number and asked them if they had any Gray Papuan on them. The four backed away slowly and ran, not stopping until they got to the gate. The stewardess gave them looks of disapproval as she took their tickets.

It took a while to get Ron into the tube that led to the airplane and once he did get in he wanted to get out. But they finally made it onto the airplane and into their seats--which Draco complained about loudly, saying that they were hard and stiff. Ron made a joke about that which made the people around them gasp and Hermione shake her head in embarrassment.

Once the stewardess had finished explaining how their seats would turn into a floatation device if the plane were to go down in the ocean and where all the exits were the captain came on the speaker to talk about things that a very scared Draco was not paying attention to.

"If we go down, my seats not going to become a floatation device--it's going to become a toilet

seat!" Harry put a hand up to his mouth to stop the laugh and elbowed Draco

in the stomach.

For some strange reason Draco had wanted the window seat. He sat, looking out at all the people outside and thinking that this was not going to be as bad as Harry had said it would. But that was until the captain turned on the engines and they started moving forward. But after a while, Draco could convince himself that it was like being in a big carriage. They started gaining speed, and, finally, Draco was pushed against his seat as the plane became slightly vertical.

He could see that Ron in front of him was just as freaked out and Harry looked slightly

sick. But Hermione, sitting next to him, was so involved in the book she had in her hands that she didn't seem to notice that they were now in the air at what seemed a billion miles off the ground.

Draco willed himself to look out the window and wished he hadn't. The airport and all the streets and towns next to it seemed like little toys, the cars little ants. Draco suddenly got a picture of himself running up and down the aisle of the airplane screaming, "Let me off, let me off, let me off!" and finally going crazy and jumping out of the plane. He shut his eyes. Hermione seemed to notice his distress and held out a little pill to him.

"You want it? It helps to relax you." Hermione's head drooped onto Draco's shoulder and she

seemed to have difficulty getting it up.

"Hermione, what is that?" Draco asked, helping her off his shoulder.

"Its a sedative--and I love it...I love you," she said to the little pill that was in her hand.

Draco frowned.

"What does it do?" Hermione stopped stroking the pill and looked at him.

"It relaxes you. I'm free as a bird!!" She stretched her arms out and started flapping them.

"Hermione...how many did you take?"

Hermione held out her fingers. "Well, lets see...I took one in the car and then there was the one in the car," she started ticking numbers off on her fingers.

"And then the one when we got to the airport and the one on the airplane. And then there was the one on the car." Hermione eyes slid out of focus and she fell back against the seat, snoring. Draco shook his head and started playing with the things on the back of the

seat in front of him. He soon fell asleep, too, and only awoke when Harry shook his shoulder and told him to 'wake up or I'll throw you off the plane'. Draco obligated and inwardly thanked Harry for waking him up after they had landed. Hermione seemed sober again as she walked off the airplane and gave in to Ron's pleads for food.

"Wait, before we eat anything here, I want to know where we are," Draco said looking around at all the weird looking people around him.

Hermione took out a little paper that had all their stops on it. "We are in....New York."

"We're in America already?" Draco asked slightly stunned.

"Yeah, you slept almost the whole way through. I told you to get plenty of sleep last night," Harry said, a tone of disapproval in his voice.

"Okay, can we eat, can we eat, and can we eat?" Ron started jumping from one foot to the other.

"Alright, Ron, calm down. Look, there's a," Hermione squinted, "McDonalds over there. Lets go check it out."

"I don't want to eat anywhere with a happy clown outside the wall, okay?" Draco's protest went unheard as Harry, Hermione and Ron went to the restaurant. They stood in line, looking at the menu above them. Draco joined them, looking at the people around him in disgust. As his shoe slid on something slimy on the floor he frowned.

"Muggles are so dirty," he said in an undertone. Harry elbowed him again, telling him not to use that word. As they moved up in line, they listened to what other people were ordering. When the person in front of them told the cashier a funny joke, they were all surprised to see the cashier give the man a free apple pie.

"Hey, I want a free apple pie," Ron said quietly.

"Yeah, I want to get something free from a dirty deranged fast food restaurant, too," Draco mocked earning him a disapproving glare from Ron. Harry didn't seem to notice.

"Yeah, come on Herm."

"What do you want me to do?!" She asked in surprise.

Draco nodded his head slowly, "I think you know," and he undid the top buttons on Hermione's blouse.

"What!! Are you kidding!! I'm not going to degrade myself for a free apple pie!!!"

"I'll share half of it with you," Ron taunted.

"...It better be a good one," Hermione said quietly as she moved to the counter. She flipped her hair and batted her eyes at the cashier, leaning on the counter so he would notice her.

He didn't.

"What would you like to order, miss? Do you have something in your eye?" She tried again.

"I would like to order your number--to go," she said, sexily. She inwardly groaned and

cursed herself for her stupidity and promised herself that Ron would pay.

The young cashier seemed unfazed. "I'm sorry, we don't carry that." He didn't even look up.

Hermione's shoulders slumped. She turned around. "I'm obviously not what he's looking for," she said turning to Draco and smiling. Draco seemed to read her mind and tried to run away, but 5 minutes later they were walking away from the restaurant with more food than they could carry and more than half of it was definitely what Hermione considered 'stolen'.

With five minutes left to go to the plane, Hermione decided to save herself the trouble and

went up to a kindly looking old lady who was walking at an amazingly fast pace.

"Excuse me, miss, do you know where this gate is?" Hermione held up the ticket.

The old lady didn't even bother looking at Hermione. "Out of the way, young- blood!! I've got 10 minutes to get to the other side of the airport and I don't have time to help little wusses like you."

Hermione stopped walking, appalled. She stood in the middle of the hall and stared after

the little old lady. From behind her, the sounds of laughter could be

heard. Harry, Draco and Ron came up to her.

"She was horrible!!!" Hermione said, her mouth hanging open. "And I think she called me

a 'young-blood', whatever that is."

"Come on, we have to get to the plane," Ron took Hermione by the shoulder and steered

her in the other direction.

They found the gate easier than Hermione expected and she got on screaming things about

how evil New Yorkers were and how she hoped they all walked super fast off the face of the

earth. She didn't shut up until Draco popped a couple of sedatives in her mouth and she slipped

into another drunken sleep. She was woken up by Ron shaking her should and screaming

something about turbulence and how they were all going to die.

Hermione sat up and started reciting survival tips but stopped when she saw that the others were

laughing hysterically. She ended up punching Ron and cursing at Draco and Harry. They stopped in Houston, Texas next and had to run for their lives from a mob of teenage girls who took one look at Harry, Ron and Draco and immediately wanted to put them in their purses and take them home with them.

Hermione ended up screaming at them and making one girl cry. All the stops and jet lag was

catching up to her more than she wanted to let on but the other three already knew that Hermione

was not someone to be messed with when she was stressful and they kept their distance.

They got back on the plane and had to cope with Hermione's complaints about how long it

took and how stupid muggles were. Then, when Draco reminded her that she was a muggle, they had to get her sedatives out again. Harry began to wonder how they were going to get home without killing themselves-or Hermione. The last stop they made was in McAllen Texas. Harry noticed a mall not that far away

and indulged Ron with stories about his childhood when Aunt Petunia and Dudley took him to a

mall once to shop for clothes for Dudley and how an associate in one of the stores went crazy and started chasing Aunt Petunia around the store, telling her that she had to sample the new perfume or the King of the Toilet Water would be very upset.

Hermione had taken so many sedatives by then that they had to take her into the boy's restroom and do a spell on her to relax her. The flight out of there was shorter and yet more tenseful than any of the others. They were close, now, and all of them had anticipated this for so long that

when they finally landed, it was like a great weight had been lifted off of their shoulders and they

all relaxed--even Hermione. They got off of the plane with a sense of knowledge, knowing that that was the last plane they would ever step foot on for three weeks.



"Okay, I guess we should go and get our luggage," Hermione said with a shrug. She looked around the airport, taking it all in.

"The sign says that the baggage claim is that way," Ron pointed out.

"Lets go, then," Harry shrugged.

They went to stand next to the conveyor belt (which Ron was amazed by) and one by one

they got pieces of their luggage until all them had everything except for Ron. One of his bags was missing and he was freaking out.

"What if I never find it again? What if the people who have open it and they see all my wizard stuff? Oh, man, I'll be in trouble then. What am I going to do?! They'll send me to jail!! I'll never see my family again!!"

Harry put a hand on Ron's shoulder. "Ron, calm down it's okay. Luggage gets lost all the time. We'll just go over to the people over there and tell them and they'll sort everything out." And so they did.

The lady they talked to seemed more interested in Draco, though, than in finding their lost

luggage and it took quiet a while to get everybody to understand what the other was saying. It

seemed the girl spoke mostly Spanish.

They were in the little room for almost an hour. The girl had left twenty minutes ago to check outside and they were left alone until someone opened the door. For a split second, they thought it was the girl again, but it was a man. He had apparently lost his luggage, too. He began searching for it among the baggage that was next to the desk on the floor.

"Don't bother," Harry said miserably, sitting on the floor. He seemed to have gone beyond

a state of boredom into a phase that seemed to have killed his sense of rational thinking.

"You won't find it. It's a big conspiracy. They don't want you to find it. They want you to stay here forever so that when you die, they can make voodoo dolls out of your bones. That's why they make you wait so long. Time is irrelevant here in the 7th circle of hell. Even despair dies here. Prepare yourself for the most--"

"Oh, here it is." The man picked a bag off the floor and almost ran to the door.

"Oh...well...lucky you..." Harry miserably picked at a thread in his shirt. Twenty minutes later, the girl came back. She started saying that she was terrible sorry and how embarrassing this was.

"The airport will give you a call if--I-I mean when we find your luggage." She smiled and batted her eyes at Draco. Hermione dragged him out of the room with Harry muttering how it was all a big conspiracy.

"Come on," Hermione said, pulling all three boys out of the tiny cramped room.

"Hey, Hermione, I hope you all planned this out and everything, 'cause I have no idea where we are going and I think we are going to need to eat something and sleep somewhere tonight," Draco said.

"Don't worry about anything, I planned everything out just fine. It's just fine." Hermione was walking very fast through the airport, looking for the door and anything else that would give her a hint as to where their rides might be.

"Oh, look," she stopped suddenly and pointed. "There they are."

***



The Arrival

Draco stood in awe as he looked on to his tour guides. He couldn't believe what he was looking at. There stood three witches wearing the exact same plastic lace up army boots, pyramid belts, black skirts with chains running up the sides, and black bowling alley shirts that were outlined in red. On the back of the shirts Draco could make out the Ellie's Tours and Travels logo, their tour guides for Mexico. He grunted and smiled in his weak pleasure at the sight of them. Maybe this will be an interesting trip after all, he thought to himself.

Draco looked closer at the nametags they wore; unsurprisingly they were black with white letters. The one standing on the left had a questionable look on her face. She seemed to be pushing over some unusual black and white striped fuzzy creature at her feet. She had black curly hair with blue streaks (which Draco was quite fond of) and black and white stockings that went over her knees. Her wrists were heavily decorated with black rubber bracelets and her around her neck she wore a red fabric choker.

Draco looked at her oddly as she addressed the creature at her feet who now held out its little arms up towards her. "No, Randy I can't pick you up we are waiting for...fine all right," she said to the creature. He watched as she reluctantly gave into the creature and picked him up into her arms. The little creature crawled into her embrace and silently lay there.

Draco looked at Hermione whose eyes had popped out of her head. "Oh my god we have just booked a trip with Satan's apprentices as our guides!" Hermione threw her hands in the air and muttered to herself silently. She was looking at the girl on the right. She wore red fish net panty hose, that stood out so much they burned Hermione's eyes. The tips of her hair were bright green and she wore a Victorian pendant choker. Ha that bright green looks more like poo green Hermione thought to herself. Hermione realized that her mouth was open and quickly shut it.

"Krissy..." she read out loud.

"Hey that is a nice name," Harry spoke up smiling at Krissy. "You see how could they be Satan's apprentices with such good names?" He was still looking at Krissy trying to get her to notice him.

"Good names? Your joking right Potter. You're just saying that because you're trying to give the eye to one of them." Draco looked at him with a devilish smile and a look of satisfaction.

"Oh sod off Malfoy. Anyway what do you think about all of this Ron? Ron?" Harry turned to see Ron looking at the one in the middle who seemed to be the one that was in charge of everything.

Ron noticed that she had purple highlights in her jet-black hair. She was wearing a lot of rubber black bracelets, a star choker around her neck, and red and black stockings that went over her knees. She was scanning the area for them when Ron's eyes met hers.

As she caught the attention of the two girls at her sides she began to walk towards the four of them. Ron could make out her name as she came nearer, it was Nereyda.

They all came arguing toward them. The one named Giselle claimed that Randy (the little furry creature) had pissed on her. She screamed at Krissy for not taking him to the bathroom before they got to the airport. Ron and Harry looked at the ground while Draco and Hermione talked about their 'Satanic' guides. Nereyda seemed to be the only one smiling which made Hermione look at her oddly.

"Hey," Nereyda said to the bunch. "We are going to be your tour guides for Mexico and we um." Nereyda looked to the two girls behind her that were still yelling at each other about the unfortunate accident that Randy had.

"Look it's your job to take him to the bathroom Giselle! I mean it is your pet and it's not my fault if he takes a tinkle on you and doesn't go in a fucking bush!" Krissy was screaming at the top of her lungs to the angry faced Giselle.

"That hurts here Krissy! That hurts here!" Giselle face pouted at Krissy and turned to see Nereyda's face full of embarrassment.

"What the hell are you both fighting about now! Can't we all just get a long for once in our miserable lives!" Nereyda looked to the two girls expecting for them to say something.

"Well Krissy started it all," Giselle pointed at Krissy evilly.

"I started it all! I am not the one with the thing that pisses all over the place!" Krissy glowered at Giselle and Nereyda just stepped in between them to stop the bickering.

"Look Giselle, Randy belongs to you so you should be in charge of him. And Krissy you were completely right to yell at Giselle," Nereyda told them in a calm voice.

"Hey," Giselle started to protest, but was cut off as a murmur was starting to be heard from Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Draco.

The three of them were reminded that they had clients waiting for them to show them around Mexico (what has gone wrong with this world). They slowly turned around with shy smiles on their faces and awkwardly said hello in unison.

"Hey you all have American accents! How very interesting." Hermione looked at them with a quizzical look on her face.

"Wait but I thought you all were Mexican's! What the bloody hell is that all about", Draco demanded.

"Well we are Hispanic and we come down here for work. It's a 'family thing' ", Giselle explained. "You must be Draco," she continued.

"Yeah how did you guess that?"

"Well judging by what you just said and how your face cringes in a soft way it was practically obvious. And plus only Draco Malfoy would wear Armani shoes on a hike up the pyramids." Giselle pointed at his shoes annoyingly. Draco knew that he had been beaten because he couldn't think of anything to say back to her. It had never happened to him and he looked down at the floor in shame.

"Well you must be Harry, Ron, and Hermione," Nereyda said. "I'm Nereyda, and this is Krissy on my right, and this is Giselle on my left. And this little problem starter is Randy," Nereyda looked at the little fur ball on the floor clutching at Giselle's leg in fear.

"I'm sorry I didn't quite catch your name," Hermione said gently to Nereyda, afraid to say something wrong.

"Oh yeah my friends and family call me Neddie for short," Neddie told Hermione.

Draco had seen his moment to regain his stature. "So are you all part of a satanic cult or something?"

"Well alright if you must know we cover ourselves in sheep blood at night and dance around a bonfire praying to Satan to come to us," Giselle said sarcastically to Draco.

"Do you do this naked? Because I wouldn't mind joining you," Draco said lifting one of his eyebrows showing his handsome face.

"Draco shut up," Harry said. "He is just really cranky about doing this in the muggle way, sorry," Harry continued.

"It's all right I am use to it," Giselle told Harry. Giselle looked down at Randy and picked him up into his arms, hugging him warmly.

While Neddie explained the travel plans to Harry, Ron, and Hermione, Draco looked at Giselle. He saw her soft eyes when she looked at Randy and how lonely she looked. He actually felt for her in a way, looking at her in a way he had never for any girl he had ever met. He wished that he could.no he had to stop thinking like this. He had a girl friend alrighty, and he couldn't even think of cheating on her. But at that moment he awoke from his state to hear Ron yelling at him.

"Malfoy? Malfoy! Malfoy," Ron yelled. "Come on we are leaving already, do you really want to stay behind here for this vacation? Well I really wouldn't mind that," Ron laughed.

"Oh be quiet Weasley, I am coming," Draco scowled at him.

Ron ran past him to catch up with Neddie. He wanted to ask her some questions about the whole trip.

"Hey Neddie, I wanted to ask you if we were going to have to sleep in sleeping bags or something like that. You know the ol' sleeping under the stars routine," Ron looked at her with his pudgy face.

"Oh of course not. Did you really think that we were going to camp," Neddie asked him. "You know that's the reason why man created hotels. And plus Giselle can't live with out a toilet or toilet paper." Neddie laughed hysterically.

Ron laughed along with her and saw out the corner of his eye Harry and Krissy talking together. "You have a pretty name," Harry said bashfully.

"You like it? You should hear my number," Krissy told him smiling.

Harry turned a bright shade of red. He smiled at her and in the midst of staring at her he bumped into a car.

"Hey watch out! Are you ok," Krissy said quickly.

"Yeah I am fine thanks," Harry replied to her feeling himself turning red once more.

"Oh I was talking to the car, but are you alright," Krissy had an awkward smile on her face.

Harry looked back at the thing that he bumped into. He stepped back in awe, as he looked at the car that they would be traveling in for the next 3 weeks.

*****

On The Way To The Hotel

"Can I come? Can I come? Can I come?" Ed was Neddie's ex-boyfriend and well he was obsessed with her and wanted to go everywhere she went.

"Oh no everyone inside the car now! " Neddie screamed at all of them and hurried them into the car.

"Neddie you can't avoid him forever!" Giselle yelled back at her trying to not get so squashed by Krissy.

"No there is no time to talk now, he is getting closer can't you hear him getting louder??!!" Neddie once again shoved everyone into the car .

"Can I come! Can I come! Can I come!?" Ed was now in sight and could be seen moving closer to them.

"Hurry!" Neddie had pilled everyone in even though they had their complaints, and got herself into the drivers seat and started the car.

"Neddie! Wait for me! I can go right??" Ed had now started running with the car and looked like he was distressed.

"No Ed! You can't go! Bye!" and with that she drove off at a great speed leaving the figure of Ed behind.

Ron looked at the inside of the Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and stared wide- eyed at the interior of the magically enlarged car. The car was stretched out like a limo (even though on the outside it was much smaller). The smell of sweet incense filled the inside of the car and Hermione had surprisingly relaxed onto one of the black leather seats.

There was a T.V and VCR that was decorated with bumper stickers that read "Don't Touch if You Want To Be Harmed By Giselle". In one of area of the car, different glass bottles sat on decorated shelves. Each had a different color of liquid that swirled in their elaborate bottles.

Ron's fiery hair glowed from the lights that shown on the roof of the car. They represented the constellations of stars in the sky and a crescent moon shown brightly with a sparkling star right next to it. Ron couldn't keep his eyes off of the magical night sky. So not thinking, he sat where he thought an empty seat was.

"Uh.Weasley I am sorry to tell you but I'm not gay. Actually very straight," Draco said to him. He shoved Ron out of his lap and wiped himself off sarcastically.

"Oh sod off Malfoy," Ron said still looking at the roof. A little person in a white rocket had just flown to the moon and sat on tope of the glittering star. He smiled at Ron and waved happily to him. Ron smiled back and in the midst of waving the little person grabbed the moon and began to eat it whole. Ron looked horrified and sat down quickly.

"Ron! You really need to watch where you sit," Harry yelled at him. Ron hurriedly got up and tripped on Hermione's foot. He landed face first on the black, surprisingly warm, carpet.

"Oh well goodie Weasley. I'm glad that your finally acting like your real age 4½," Draco said smiling at him.

"Why don't you join me Draco," Ron seethed at him. "You should feel comfortable down here. Being at the bottom of everything was always where you could be found right?" Ron looked up at him and looked at him angrily.

"Yes, I always did like the bottom," Draco said coolly. He bent down to get near Ron's ear and said, "But your sister always loved the top." He leaned back with a smile playing at the corners of his mouth.

"What!" Ron went at Draco with fury. He went straight for Draco's neck, but was interjected by Harry's strong hold on him.

"Don't you ever go near her Malfoy! I'm warning you," Ron spat at Draco. He struggled to get free of Harry's arms but finally gave up.

"Ron don't take it seriously you know that Draco is just messing with your head. Calm down." Harry let go of Ron. Ron backed away from Draco unable to hear Draco's muttering about his sister really liking it. He finally went to go sit next to Hermione whom he found sound asleep, curled up on the leather seat.

"Hey is everything alright back here? We heard some yelling, you all aren't getting to frisky back here are you?" Krissy walked in from a compartment that was in the front of the car. The music from the compartment was so loud that they had to cover their ears to shut out the heavy metal sounds. Krissy shut the door behind her noticing their covered ears.

"I just want you all to know that the incense is not weed smoke, so don't start getting all high on the incense. Actually I really don't think that you can get stoned but hey just a precaution." Krissy walked over to the decorated shelves with the elaborate bottles.

"Everything is peachy," Harry said. He was trying to act normal around her but somehow the word peachy had completely messed up the whole thing.

"Hey I know for a fact that when someone says 'Everything is peachy' there in fact is something wrong," Krissy told Harry. She noticed that he was trying to wink his eye in the right way but wasn't getting successful.

"Is there something wrong with you eye?" Krissy pointed at his now twitching eye.

"Oh um.no. I am fine I just have to uh.hide here for a while." Harry put his face in his head.

"I came to tell you we'll be arriving soon at the hotel, in Tampaulipas." Krissy started to open the bottle of purple liquid that she had pulled off one of the shelves.

Harry who had stopped hiding behind his hands and knew was not blushing so badly anymore, looked up and saw Krissy with the bottle of swirling liquid that Krissy was holding. He saw his chance.

"Do you need some help with that," Harry asked anxiously.

"No thanks, I've got it," Krissy said looking oddly at Harry.

" You want to help her wipe her ass to Potter?" Draco smiled devilishly at Harry.

"Shut the hell up Malfoy! Who died and mad you God?" Harry was embarrassed beyond belief, and had turned a strawberry red in only just a few seconds.

"Oh I think his name was Salazar Slytherin," Draco retorted laughing. Harry closed his mouth after Ron shoved him in the side with his elbow.

Krissy stood where she was looking coolly at Draco. "Hey Draco you like to drink right," Krissy asked politely.

"Why yes I do." Draco's attention went straight to the purple liquid that Krissy had poured into an elegant glass. "I have here soda de uva, which is an excellent and popular drink in Mexico." Krissy put the drink in his hand and continued, "Would you like to try some. I really think you'll like it. It has the flavor of a Mai Tai in it.

"Well if it's suppose to taste like that then I'll take it," Draco tipped his glass to Harry and Ron, and sipped.

"Well be at the hotel shortly, uh you can buzz us in the front but the music is far too loud for us to hear," Krissy said walking back into the front area, which was still quite loud with the sounds of punk music in the air.

For the rest of the drive Draco drank half of the bottle of soda de uva, while Hermione (who had woken up complaining about the noise of the front compartment) explained all of the scenery that they passed.

They finally stopped in front of the hotel that they would be staying at. Draco stumbled out of the car followed by Harry, Ron, and Hermione.

"Draco are you smashed!" Hermione looked like she was about to pull out every strand of her hair. Krissy, Giselle (who was holding Randy), and Neddie had just stepped out of the front area of the car and started laughing at the crazy looking Hermione that was now flaying her arms in the air at an invincible bird.

"I can't believe that our doing this on my vacation! You better get sober now or I swear I'll." Hermione was interrupted by a sudden low grunt by her side.

"Um.Draco you can give up the act now you see soda de uva is Spanish for Grape Soda," Krissy said with a laugh. Everyone burst into laughter as Draco gave up the act and tried to talk over them.

"I knew it was fake when I didn't get buzzed, I was just being like that because." Draco rushed his words to try to get them to hear.

"Sure you did," Neddie said to him. "Well um.for the people that are not complete idiots let's check into the hotel."

***** The Elevator

Draco walked silently behind the group. He felt completely crushed and knew that he couldn't make a come back after his idiotic incident. Ron on the other hand made him feel worse by reminding him that he would always be on bottom, which completely added the insult to injury.

So he decided to get all of them back when they slept, you know the ol' hiding underneath the bed thing to make boogie boogie sounds to scare them out of their wits. He thought that that would satisfy his thrust for revenge for the moment and joined the group.

Neddie had decided on La Villa as the hotel that they would be staying at. Hermione tried to tell Harry about some of the food that they would have to eat sooner or later but Harry was to preoccupied with trying to figure out what pick line he could use on Krissy.

"Now Harry I took the liberty in bringing some Aspirin and Tylenol for any of the stomach aches that any of us might get from the Mexican food here. Since our stomachs are not use to the food here it will take a while for it to get accustomed to the new food that we eat." Hermione pulled out two white little bottles that read Aspirin and Tylenol and quickly put them back in her little purse.

What if I use the "Are you feet tired? Because you've been running through my mind all day" No, No definitely not Harry thought.

"Harry? Are you listening to me at all?" Hermione felt like if she was talking to a wall and she was actually.

"Oh fine Harry, I am going to go ask someone about what exactly we are going to eat for tonight." Hermione stormed off in the direction of one of the bellboys, who she had been eyeing for quite sometime now.

How about "Can you help me? I was looking for your heart and got lost in your eyes!" Nope that will be in my back pocket for later Harry continued to think.

Meanwhile Draco and Neddie waited for the help to come out of hiding. A shiny contraption (known to Neddie as a campana) had caught the attention of Draco and he began to look at it in an odd way. At first he poked at it to see if it was suppose to have a little creature inside of it that would eventually jump out at you to get away from it home, but no such thing happened to his dismay.

"You know Draco that is a campana," Neddie said to him. She had noticed his little predicament in trying to work it. "All you have to do is push that little button on the top and it will ring for help, which we really do need right now." Neddie looked at him with an odd expression as he pushed the button.

PING! PING! PING!

"Well I knew that. I just was testing you, yeah just testing you. I think that you've passed." Draco said to her while he pushed away the campana. And out of nowhere the help slowly rose from behind the counter. He was middle aged and looked like he had been dreading the moment when he would have to come out from behind the counter.

"Si," The man addressed Neddie.

"Si, yo soy Nereyda Esparza," Neddie said to the man. She gave him a paper that looked like a reservation for a presidential suite. The man took the paper and seemed to type so many unnecessary things while he could've just used the mouse in order to get the room number.

"Tu quarto es 235." The man gave Neddie a gigantic key for the room and went slowly slid back down to his little area behind the counter.

"What did he say," Draco asked Neddie trying looking behind the counter.

"Oh he said that you needed a new face and that he hopes you wither in your old age," Neddie said with a serious look on her face.

"Oh well I didn't like him anyway." Draco cast a devil look at behind the counter hoping the man would be able to see him. But at that sudden moment he heard a harsh whistle in his ear. Soon after that he saw the whole group coming up to them.

"Well I have our room key and I am just going to say right now that if anyone trashes the room I will have your food poisoned." Neddie smiled at all of them and turned to the nearest elevator.

"Hey hey, what is that thing and why are you getting in it?" Ron had a horrified look on his face as he watched the metal doors open. "Your not seriously going to get in that are you?"

"Why not its fast and well I don't want to walk up the stairs," Krissy called at him.

They all had entered into the elevator except for Draco and Ron, who seemed to be baffled by the contraption. Giselle was really starting to get annoyed because she had just spend the whole time in the bathroom helping Randy go to the bathroom for the 100th time during the last hour.

"Look guys I am not going to hold this button (the button held the doors open) forever so either you get inside or I'm closing the doors." Neddie looked at them waiting for an answer.

"There is no way I am going to get in that," Ron said to them.

"Alright suit yourselves." Neddie let the button go and the metallic doors shut.

"Great Weasley just great. Now what are we going to do huh?" Draco walked up to the doors and saw a button next to the doors. At the top of the elevator it showed the number 3.

"Well I think we're going to have to do this ourselves. Come on," Draco sighed. He pushed the button and he could hear the elevator coming down for them.

"Draco are you sure you know what your doing," Ron asked. He didn't know what to think when he was with Draco, but maybe for once he wasn't going to screw things up.

"Yes, Yes. Now come on," Draco said.

DING!

The elevator had reached their floor and the metal doors slowly opened revealing the inside of the elevator. It had a glazed wooden floor with silver railings on the walls (which made Ron want to know why they had those there). Draco stepped in and waved at Ron to come in.

Ron cautiously stepped in hoping that the doors weren't going to crush him at the moment he stepped all the way in.

"Ron hurry

"Ron hurry! The doors!" Draco screamed at Ron. Ron ran bolted in the little compartment and panted in his loss of breath.

"I seriously don't know how you fell for that one Weasley! Your just so gullible." Draco was laughing at him and getting ready to defend himself if need be. Only Ron just looked at him with distaste and pulled himself together.

"Alright what is this?" Ron pointed at the rows of buttons that each had a number on them.

"Well isn't it obvious Weasley? They are for the room numbers. So what we'll do is put in our room number and we'll be there in no time." Draco pushed the numbers 2,3, and 5. At first nothing happened but the elevator started with a jolt and Ron went sprawling for the nearest rail. It had come clear to him why they were put there.

Draco had also gone to one of the rails and felt dizzy from speed that they were going at. His head started spinning when he noticed that the elevator was coming to a stop. He thanked the heavens for just knowing that he would be getting off. The door opened and to Ron's and his surprise a hallway was where the room should've been. "Ok we must put the numbers in wrong. Lets try to." Draco suddenly stopped when he noticed the doors closing again.

"No! Wait!" Ron had grown hysterical and wanted out. "We are going to die on something we don't even know how to work! This is all your fault Draco!" Ron slipped back to the rail and shut his eyes because the dizziness had come back when they started moving again. This continued for the next half hour because Draco kept pushing buttons and each time they tried to get out because each time Ron thought they would be crushed.

After some heavy thinking Draco finally realized that the 3 on the top of the elevator was the floor and the elevator didn't take them to their room. "Weasley just hang on one more time I have got it this time."

"You liar! We are going to die and I am still a virgin!" Ron had now gone beyond the point of madness and crossed into just plain old bonkers. Draco paid no attention to him and pushed the number three and held on tightly to avoid the feeling of pressure crushing him.

DING!

Draco opened his eyes getting ready to run out the little compartment. He saw Krissy and Neddie laying on the wall opposite of each other waiting for them.

"Finally, I thought you all would never get here," Krissy said to them.

"Well are you all going to get out or are we going to have to pull you out?" Neddie looked at them annoyed. Draco and Ron both walked out and looked exhausted. They were trying to get the world to stop spinning and they were also having trouble standing up right.

"So next time when I tell you to come in you better haul some ass ok," Neddie said to them half sarcastically.

"I had a mini-throw up Neddie. I don't think I will be going back in there unless I have too," Ron said with a half smile.

"Well come on guys, let's get to the room." Krissy turned around and headed down the hallway. Ron and Draco trailed behind them with embarrassed faces.

*****

Hotel Room

Draco and Ron walked into their room. It seemed to them that it was more like a penthouse for a rich family that wouldn't pour themselves wine and got the butler to do it, because they didn't want to get dirty. Ron looked around the Presidential Suite in awe. They gazed at the huge room they had just entered and onto the gigantic TV that was against one of the walls. There was a bar at the far end complete with refrigerator and liquor. A huge window behind the bar let them look out at the city of ______ and there were big, plump couches in front of the oversized TV. A chandelier hung crystalline and sparkling over their heads. He had, to say the least, never been in a room so lavishly furnished and opulent-looking. He just stared, afraid to move in case they broke, ripped or stained something. Draco, on the other hand, moved into the room and flopped down on one of the couches, put his feet up on the coffee table and stretched out leisurely, as if the room were no different than his room at the Manor. Then they remembered that it probably wasn't. Giselle came from the room to left , maneuvered around Ron, and stared at Draco lying so comfortably on the couch with laughter in her eye. "Take your feet of the coffee table, it's not polite," she said. Draco just looked at her, not sure what to do. Giselle rolled her eyes and was about to yell at him when Randy suddenly peed on her again. "Crap on a cracker, Randy!! Seriously! What's your problem? Do I have to put a diaper on you or something?!" and she walked out of the room carrying Randy out in front of her. "Hey, what's that thing?" Draco asked, pointing to the t.v. Harry moved inside the room and carefully sat down next to Draco. "It's a television. Don't turn it on, it might blow up." Hermione stood in the doorway of the room that Giselle had come out of , which Ron figured out had to be where the girls were going to sleep, her arms were crossed and she had a look of disapproval on her face. "I think she wanted you to get your feet off the table." Draco looked over at her. "How do you know? You don't speak Spanish." "Well, isn't it obvious. Right when you put your feet on the table she told you something. And besides, even if that wasn't what she said, you should still take them off. It's not polite." Draco grumbled but took his feet off. Ron laughed in his throat and looked around the room again. He noticed another door on his right. It was closed at the moment and Ron thought it to be where all of the guys would be spending quality time together. Ahhh.that came out all wrong Ron thought. Krissy and Neddie came into the room then and dropped the small luggage that they were carrying on the floor. "Where's Giselle?" Neddie asked while Krissy walked over to the bar and opened the refrigerator. "She sprung a leak," Draco said, pointing to a wet spot on the fuzzy blue carpet. Neddie shook her head and pulled out her wand. She put it to the carpet, muttered something under her breath and the puddle suddenly dried. "I swear, if that thing doesn't die soon from loss of it's own bodily fluid, I'm going to kill it." Hermione stared open mouthed at Neddie. "Why would you do that?" she asked her, horrified. "It reminds me too much of a cat," Neddie made a face at the very mention of the word. "It does not look like a cat, you just hate anything that's furry and walks on four legs because you're dead inside!" Krissy yelled from across the room. She had gotten out a bottle of liquor and a cup from a cupboard. Draco held up a cup from the coffee table. "Hey, can you top me off?" Krissy came out from behind the counter over to the couch and was about to fill Draco's cup when Neddie came up to them and took the bottle away. "You shouldn't be drinking. You're underage." Krissy frowned and made a grab for the bottle. "Come on, when you're in Mexico, you're underage for nothing." But Neddie kept the bottle out of reach. Giselle came in then carrying a very confined looking Randy. He had what looked like a towel tied around his butt and was scratching at it like crazy. "I don't think he likes that very much," Draco said looking at the poor fuzzy creature that was now tugging at the makeshift diaper. "He pees everywhere. I've told him before that if he didn't stop, I would be forced to treat him like a baby. If I've told him once I've told him a million times. If I don't put this on him, we'll have a bill the size of Nebraska to pay for damage to property. Are you going to help me pay it?" she asked Draco inquiringly. "N-no..." "I thought so." And she walked across the room to join Krissy in the bar. "Don't worry about her, the little cat just gets her mad sometimes and she takes it out on other people." Neddie told them as if warning them. "He isn't a cat!!" Giselle yelled from across the room in fury. "Krissy are you going to pour a damn drink for me or am I going to have to unleash Randy from his towel so that he may piss all over you?!" "Ok. Ok! I would rather spend an eternity with paper dolls as my companions before I ever let you do that to me!" Krissy brought down another bottle of liquor that was labeled Smirnoff and poured it to Giselle. "Oh thank the Heavens for this! I have needed one so bad!" Giselle sipped at it eagerly. "Hey is anyone going to give me something to drink?" Draco looked around at all of them who had now crowded around the bar. "Draco if you wanted something to drink so bad why don't get off your lazy ass and get it." Harry looked over at him with annoyance. "Yeah Draco, where not going to be your damn servants in waiting," Neddie said to him. Everyone laughed at him and after a few seconds of that went back to getting a round of drinks. Even Neddie had to have something to ease her stress; she had been planning on what was going to happen tomorrow and it took a lot out of her. Believe it or not Harry was still trying to figure out how to start off a conversations with Krissy. "Hey Krissy um.so" Harry finally had caught Krissy attention and was now thinking of what to say next. "Yeah Harry? Did you need something?" Krissy looked at him questionably.

"Uh.what's your favorite movie?" Harry said. You're such an idiot! What kind of a conversation starter was that?! "Well that will take a while, I don't have a favorite movie. I have many. But do you really want to hear about them because well it's quite long." Krissy insisted. "I have a lot of time," Harry said with a smile of delight. Maybe that line wasn't such a burden after all he thought to himself. They talked a while before Giselle and Neddie yelled out that their supper was ready. They all crowded around the little kitchen that was conveniently next to the bar eating sandwiches, which Hermione, Draco, Ron, and Harry knew only as cold cuts. "Sandwiches? What do you mean Sandwiches? Are they edible in anyway?" Hermione asked many questions on the matter and Krissy finally had to explain to her and the rest of them that Sandwiches were cold cuts, but in America and Mexico they were called Sandwiches. When they all adjourned to their beds it was 2 in the morning and Draco was just about to have his revenge on all of them by pulling little pranks on each person. When he had made sure that everyone was asleep he crept out of bed carefully not to awake Ron or Harry and opened the door to their room. Everything was dark and the only light came from the glowing moon through the large windows on each side of the gigantic TV. Everything looked as if it was picked from a movie and Draco could only think of one thing. Wink Wink. He tipped toed silently to the girl's room on the other side of the spacious TV area. And then at the moment when he was about to turn the knob to the door Neddie's voice could be heard from the couch that was in front of the TV. "Draco go back to bed now!" Neddie sat up from the couch with a frown on her face and watched Draco, who was now looking at the floor in shame that he had been caught, walk back in to the boy's room and shut the door quietly. "Damn pervert! Its 2 in the morning and he up this late for only one thing that I can think of!" Neddie muttered to herself and reminded herself to retell the story to her friends in the morning. At that moment Giselle walked in with a rather distressed Randy. "Randy for the love of god you really have to stop this!" Giselle turned to Neddie and smiled. "What are you doing out here?" "I am patrolling the area, you know so that someone doesn't go off and try to do something naughty naughty." Neddie pointed her finger at her as if she was scowling a little girl. "So, you having trouble with the cat?" Neddie said just to piss her off. "Randy is not a cat for the last time! And no this time he had another nightmare. He's been having terrible dreams every night since I found him. I know because I did a spell on him to see his dreams, and Neddie they are really horrific. I don't know what to do for him anymore," Giselle said. She held Randy close to her and the little fuzzy creature put his head on her chest. "Well I don't know what to say, I mean what can we do for him when we don't even know what he is?" Neddie had a good point and well she felt sorry for the little guy, even thought she dreaded the site of something that looked even remotely close to a cat. "I know.give him a sleeping charm for now and in the morning we'll ask Hermione if she can find out anything to help him. I am sure that she will help; I mean she can't stay away from books for a short period of time or it will kill her." Neddie looked at her assuring. "Yeah your right I guess I'll just get him to bed. See ya in the morning Neddie." Giselle smiled at her and walked back to the girl's room with Randy clinging to her. Neddie laid down once more thinking that her troubles for the night were all over but of course she thought wrong. A loud scream could be heard from inside of the girl's room. "What is wrong with you people?! Do you all have Insomnia or are you all just clinically insane! "Oh my god!!! AAHH!!" Krissy voice could be heard for miles. Neddie nearly tripped over herself when she tried to get up from the couch. The boys also heard the commotion and ran out of their room stumbling on each other. Neddie and the boys ran into the room to see what was going on. What they saw completely amazed them. "Krissy for the love of god it was just a cockroach! Get over it!" Giselle was yelling at a horrified girl. Randy clung on Giselle's shoulders like she was giving him a conky-ride, but it was all too obvious that he had gotten scared when Krissy freaked out. Hermione stood in the corner trying to figure out what the hell was going on. "But Giselle you don't get it. What cockroaches do to me is like what cats do to Neddie! I am going to die!!" Krissy plopped on her bed and put the pillow over her head. Neddie looked at Krissy and shook her head with a big smile on her face. Harry was trying to figure out a good way to calm down Krissy but nothing good was coming to mind. Krissy are you ok? No! Hey Krissy are you all right? Definitely not! "This is what the racket is all about! Shit I am going back to bed!" Draco whirled around with a cruel smile on his face because at least he had been able to get the cockroach under the door of the girl's room before Neddie had caught him. Yeah I am feeling a lot better now he thought to himself. Draco walked happily back to his room and went to bed. "Krissy come on its late and we all need our rest," Neddie told her calmly.

"Fine fine, but just to let everyone know I will be traumatized for the next couple of days, just to warn you." Krissy told everyone matter-o- factly. Everyone went back to bed and Krissy decided to get some water before she would. Only Ron and Harry stood outside their door because Harry wanted to make sure that Krissy was all right. "Harry why don't you just go talk to her, I mean you really seemed to be interested in her. Just go already. I'll see you in the morning." Ron went to the room and went to bed. Harry was left alone and finally just gave up thinking of a good line and went straight up to Krissy and went blank. "Hey Harry, I am sorry bout earlier but I am quite scared of those damn things that can crawl up your legs and oh my god they can fly too!!" Krissy was ranting now about that damn little bug and she wouldn't stop. "I'm sorry Harry were you going to say something?" "Um.no. I'll just be going now." Harry had turned a strawberry red and turned around to leave. "Oh alright then good night Harry!" Krissy called out to him. "Krissy for the love of god my heart can't take it anymore!! Don't you see it!?" Neddie called out to her from the couch. "See what?" "The damn google eyes that that boy gives you.he has a thing for you, you clueless dork!" Neddie was to tired to go over and hit her upside the head so she just threw a pillow at her. "No he doesn't.and yeah your carefully aimed pillow missed me." Krissy said to her from the door to the girl's room. "Oh forget it Krissy go to bed! And please if you see a fucking cockroach please oh please don't scream and yell.now go slave and sleep or I'll wake you up earlier than we are supposed to." Neddie closed her eyes and heard the door click to the girl's room (but Neddie didn't see that Krissy had taken a moment and smiled at the boy's room before she closed her door) and the quite surrounded her. *****

Morning After

As if their first night in the muggle world of another country wasn't hectic enough, when Harry, Hermione, Ron, and Draco woke up the next morning it was pure insanity in room number 235. Neddie was in the small kitchen trying to fix breakfast and simultaneously wrestle a bottle of Smirnoff away from Giselle. Giselle was trying with all her might to get the bottle away from Neddie and keep Randy away from the burnt food on the stove.

"No, Randy! You can't eat that. It's probably poison. Neddie couldn't cook to save her life."

"It's perfectly fine food and if you don't believe me, I'll shove it down your throat so you can choke on it! Get that thing away from me!!" Randy had just jumped from the stove onto Neddie's shoulders in a mad attempt to help Giselle get the bottle away from her.

Harry, Ron, and Draco walked out of the boy's room at the same time that Hermione walked out of the girl's. They stared at their two tour guides and tried to act like this didn't disturb them. It did actually, but only because they knew that they would have to get in the same car with one of them behind the wheel later, and all four of them secretly hoped it would not be Giselle, who was running around the room with her bottle of first- thing-in-the-morning alcohol, trying to get away from a fuming Neddie. Hermione had given up trying to judge tier moods by their appearance because they always seemed to be in dark colors.

Today Neddie had on a black skirt that was much like the ones that Hermione wore Hogwarts with black cloth stockings underneath that were ripped in some places. Giselle wore a pair of black polyester pants so baggy that her legs were lost in them and the hem covered her shoes, making it impossible to tell that they were the same two-inch black shoes she wore the day before.

Both of them had on the same design shirts of yesterday except these were red with a black outline instead of the other way around. They had their nametags on again and the tour guides logo on the back. A black chocker with a silver fairy on it hugged Giselle's neck.

They were altogether a very weird sight to look upon. Krissy walked out of the girl's bedroom then. She was wearing the same t-shirt as the other two and had on pants that were exactly like Giselle's except that she had on regular tennis shoes (which were black--of course) and her necklace was now a single star on a short thin silver chain.

Her nails were a pattern of a very bright green and a dark black, alternating on every other finger. Her hair was still wet, the green standing out against the black curls. She stopped in the doorway and looked at her two best friends wrestling in the tiny kitchen that was barely big enough to hold a single person, black smoke was coming out from under the cover of a pot. Krissy shook her head and calmly walked over to the kitchen and suddenly joined in the fighting that was going on.

"What the hell are two doing? Are you trying to get us killed?" She took the bottle away from Giselle (who was holding it up-since she was taller than Neddie-and screaming "You'll never take it away from me! Never!") And put it back in the cupboard. She then proceeded to tell

Neddie that she could not cook and it was better just not try. After she was done creating peace, Krissy gave the two instructions to sit in front of the TV and not move until breakfast was done. Giselle and Neddie made their way to the couches grumbling and calling Krissy names under their breaths.

Krissy looked around the room at the four people who were just standing there looking at them. "All right, nothing to see here shows over folks. You better hurry and get dressed, we'll be leaving first thing after breakfast." When nobody moved, Krissy tried again.

"It's no big deal, they do this every morning. It's like a ritual. You should be concerned if they don't do it."

Everybody looked at Giselle and Neddie who were now hitting each other on the arm rather hard, but not looking at each other. Krissy shook her head and started pulling out pans and things from the refrigerator.

Harry, Ron and Draco walked back into the boy's room and each headed for the bathroom. They stopped when all three of them got stuck in the doorway.

"If you two don't mind," Draco began in a superior manner.

"Sod off, Malfoy. I need this shower more than you do."

"What, Ron, it's not like Mexico had cooties or anything. You can wait," Draco said

"Like hell I can!" Ron tried to push his way in but Draco held him in place.

"You know I think Harry might need a cold shower more than the rest of us. With any luck it'll last all day and he won't have to worry about making a fool out of himself in front of one third of the freak show out there." Draco smirked.

"Shove off, Malfoy," Harry said, moving out of the doorway and into the bathroom.

"Hey! Get back out here! I think we should play for it. Best two out of three!"

"Yeah right Ron. I suggest you two get out of here before I start stripping down." The other two boys quickly moved out of the doorway and back into the bedroom.

For a Presidential Suite, the bedroom was surprisingly plain. But maybe it was because they had asked for three small separate beds instead of the regular behemoth one that came with the room.

Draco and Ron played 'Paper, Rock, Scissors' for who would get the bathroom next and Ron won. He began rummaging through his suitcase, muttering how much he needed his other one back. Draco walked out of the bedroom and headed towards the seat where Giselle was now sitting alone, twirling a lock of her curly black hair in her finger.

Draco tilted his head. She reminded him somewhat of Melinda, who was probably somewhere in the Hogwart's Slytherin common room posting wizard pictures of Draco all over her four-poster bed. After all, that's what girlfriends do right? Not looks wise, but Giselle had that same quality that had first attracted Draco to his girlfriend back in Britain. Draco went to go sit down next to Giselle.

"Hey, where's the hair ball?" Damn.

Giselle looked at him in disgust. "He's not a hair ball. He's just a little fuzzy. And Krissy was kind enough to take him out for a while."

"Oh. So...where are we going today?" For some weird reason Draco suddenly felt like Harry.

"Well, that's really Nereyda's thing. She took on the four of you, she set up the dates, and she has the schedule. Krissy and I are just kind of tagging along cause there's so many of you and, well, we don't spend as much time as we like around each other because we take different assignments most of the time. So in a way, this is kind of like our vacation, too."

"Oh...so...where did Neddie go?"

Giselle laughed at the mispronunciation of Neddie's name. "Neddie's out on the balcony." She stressed the nickname so that Draco might catch up on it.

"Are you sure that's safe. I mean, she seemed kind of...high strung," Draco looked out of the window behind the bar, as if Neddie would jump any minute.

"Of course that's safe," Giselle said sounding offended. Then she smiled slightly. "Now, if she had Randy out there, then I'd be worried."

Draco laughed a little more than the lame joke would intend and Giselle asked him what was the matter.

"She kind of reminds me of a replica of Hermione. You know, I don't think Hermione likes her very much." He laughed and quickly changed the subject for fear of Hermione overhearing. "Where did you come up with a name like that?"

Giselle frowned. "What's wrong with Randy?"

Draco tried to stifle his laugh. "Well, lets just say that it's not very...proper where we come from."

Giselle rolled her eyes, "And why not?"

"Well, lets just say-"

"Oh, come on! What does it mean half way around the world that makes it so wrong to name your animal that?"

"It's not so much wrong as it is funny," Draco said smirking again.

Giselle rolled her eyes again, made a noise in the back of her throat and got up, walking over to the kitchen to stand with Krissy.

You sure as hell do make a great first impression, you twit, Draco thought to himself, shaking his head and figuring out a way to make up for it later.

***

In the cramped kitchen, Giselle leaned against the counter. Krissy hummed a very annoying tone as she put the finishing touches on the breakfast.

"I really hate his type," Giselle said out of nowhere.

"Who's?" Krissy asked, not breaking her rhythm at the stove.

"The blonde over there. There too...I don't know, what's the word..."

"Conceited? Egotistical? Self-important? Vainglorious? Complacent?" Krissy offered.

"Smug," Giselle said simply. Krissy chuckled over at the stove.

"What?" Giselle asked, knowing what was coming.

"You like him," Krissy said, pulling each word and make it longer. Then she made a song out of it: "You like him, you want to kiss him, you want to marry him, you want to."

"If you don't shut up, I'm going to make Randy pee on you."

An hour later, everyone was standing around the pint-size kitchen, holding a plate up, waiting to be served. Krissy picked up the pan and started shoveling different things onto plates. When Hermione got her plate back, she looked at it.

"Um...what is this?" She asked nonchalantly.

"Migas, and beans," Neddie said, picking up something flat and tearing a piece off of it.

"What?" Draco said, looking at his plate like it was going to eat him.

"It's just tortillas, eggs, tomatoes, onions, and a bit of green bell peppers." Giselle said, picking up the same thing that Neddie had.

"And what is that?" Ron asked, pointing to it.

"That's a tortilla," Krissy said the word slowly, so they could understand.

"What are you guys doing with it?" Harry asked

"Eating. You pick up your food with it." Neddie said doing just that.

"Think of it as a Mexican fork," Krissy said holding up a thin round dish that had more tortillas in it. When nobody went for one, Krissy sighed. "Come on, if your going to stay in Mexico, you are going to have to act like a Mexican."

"Or else they'll kill you," Giselle added helpfully.

"You're never going to get an authentic Mexican meal anywhere in English Ville there so you might as well soak up what you can here." Neddie said as a ruse to try to get them to eat.

"It's really good," she taunted.

"Oh, for the love of God!" Giselle slid a plate over to her and tore off a piece of tortilla. She put it to the food and scooped up the eggs and a little bit of beans. Then she put it in the mouth of the closest person to her. Which just happened to be Draco.

He was about to protest but it was too late. He might have thought highly of himself but he still held manners in high regard and his mother had always told him that it was important not to talk with you mouth full. So he would have to wait until he swallowed to begin yelling.

But, as the food hit his tongue he realized that he didn't want to yell and say that she had poisoned him, because he wanted to eat more. Harry, Hermione, and Ron looked at him as if expecting Draco to explode. But when Draco looked at them and gave them the thumbs up sign and asked Giselle how to pick up the food with the 'tortilla', they thought that it couldn't be that bad.

"Wow," Harry said after finally being able to put the eggs and beans in the tortilla, "that's good. Who made it?"

"I did," Krissy said, rearranging the tortillas in the plate.

"You can cook?" Harry asked. "That's really...super..."

"Super? What are you Potter, five?" Draco whispered when Krissy turned around to put up the plates.

"Let me show you how a real pick up line goes," he said. Draco walked over to where Giselle was sitting on the couch, finishing her breakfast and stood next to her, straightening his clothes. He cleared his throat.

"Excuse me, miss, but, is this seat empty?" Harry could tell that that one line was merely the beginning of a whole mess of pick up lines that would follow.

"Yes, and mine will be too if you sit down," Giselle said, looking up at Draco and smiling innocently. He gaped at her. Harry presumed that Draco had never had anyone turn him down before and this was a relatively new experience that he didn't like much. Ron could be heard behind Harry laughing.

"Laugh it up, Weasley," Draco said, walking back to the counter and leaning on it.

"Oh, come on, Malfoy," Harry said, thinking of cheering Draco up, "This isn't going to be the last time a girl turns you down."

"She didn't turn me down!" Draco said quickly. "She just didn't catch the vibe that I was giving off..."

"Malfoy that makes no sense whatsoever," Ron sniggered.

"It doesn't matter 'cause she didn't turn me down."

"Yeah, right, whatever. I think we're leaving soon." Ron pointed at the door to the hotel room and the three boys turned to see Nereyda at the doorway and a very tense looking Hermione probing her with questions.

"Do you think it's going to be hot out there? Should I bring a hat and sunscreen? Is it going to take long to get there? Where are we going anyways?"

Neddie barely had enough time to answer one question before Hermione would launch into another one. "It's a hundred degrees at 7 o'clock in the morning. Unless you want to burn to death. It shouldn't take that long to get there driving. We're going hiking."

At the last statement from Neddie, Draco made a noise in the back of his throat. Neddie and Hermione stopped talking and stared at him.

"Excuse me?" Neddie asked.

"Did you just say that we were going hiking?" Draco asked making a face at the very thought.

"Yes, Draco, we are going hiking and when I say 'we' that includes you, too." Neddie put her hands on her hips and raised an eyebrow, as if daring Draco to tell her otherwise.

Draco looked at Neddie, who looked scarier than Hermione did when finals came around at the moment and then back down at the counter. "That's fine," Draco mumbled and felt Harry chuckle beside him.

"What, Potter, you want to argue with her, be my guest, but I want to live to see Britain again." Harry's laughing stopped when Neddie began to glare at him from across the room.

From inside the girl's bedroom Giselle's voice yelled out, "Okay, everybody gather around the door, we're about to leave."

Once all four of the vacationers were around the door to the hotel room, Giselle, Neddie and Krissy came out of the bedroom.

"Okay, now listen up all of you," Neddie said, "We're going to take a little hiking trip today. It's nothing really, just a little exercise but you have to go prepared."

"Yeah," Giselle said, "Each one of you should take a big bottle of water and hats and sunscreen," Giselle looked Draco up and down, "and clothes suitable for getting dirty." She smiled at the look of disgust on Draco's face. Not sure about what the terrific trio had gotten him into Draco raised his hand.

"What is it, Draco," Krissy asked.

"Am I in anyway going to break a sweat out there at any time?"

Everybody groaned and walked away from the little huddle they had made to go find the things they needed. An hour later, after everyone had changed and gotten everything they needed together, they all stood at the door waiting to go out. Hermione was in a skirt, as usual, but Nereyda had forced her to lose the stockings, since it was so hot outside and she wore a pair of hiking boots that Krissy had given her for the day. Draco fidgeted uncomfortably next to Giselle. The muggle clothes they had forced him to put on were stiff and itchy.

"What's the matter," Giselle asked him.

Draco pulled at the collar of the dark blue t-shirt. "I think I'm allergic to cotton," he whispered. Giselle giggled.

"Well, we couldn't have you walking around outside in robes. You'd draw attention to us."

Draco goggled at Giselle. Like the way they were dressed wasn't going to draw attention to them.

"Everybody ready?" Nereyda asked. She looked excited and jumpy. Much like Hermione. "Let's go, then."

At 20 minuets to 1:00pm all 7 of them piled out of the hotel room. Down the elevator-which Ron and Draco eventually got into-out to the lobby and past the doors. They waited for the valet to bring up Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and then they got in.

"Are you ready to go?" Neddie asked from behind the wheel. There was a certain excitement in the air that even Draco caught. But just as Neddie was about to pull out, Ed came up to the passenger's side's front window and popped his head in.

"How 'bout today? Can I come today?" he asked, smiling innocently. Neddie groaned, and Giselle rolled her eyes.

"Look, Ed, we have a lot to do today, and I don't think there's' enough room for you back there. Maybe some other day, all right?" Krissy asked softly, wanting to let him down as easily as she could.

"But I get so lonely in the summer time." Krissy turned away from the big eyes and let Neddie take it away from there. All passers-by could hear from the inside of the seemingly tiny car was loud cuss words in Spanish.

Giselle was slightly glad that their customers couldn't understand Neddie when she made a very crude remark about how much of a 'man' Ed was. Krissy tried to calm down Neddie by trying to get Ed as far away from her as possible.

"Some other time, Ed. I promise."

"Please?" The big eyes again. But the car pulled away from the curb before Ed could get another word out, leaving him standing alone in a cloud of smoke. The people in the car could barely make out a faint "Okay, I'll wait for you right here!" before the lone figure disappeared around a corner. Inside the car, Neddie was laughing at the pathetic form that stood alone.

"Neddie, don't be so mean to him; you're gong to drive the poor boy to suicide or something," Krissy warned.

"Just as long as it gets him far away from me, I don't care. Just like now. As long as I get as far away from him as possible, today will still be a great day." Just then, Neddie put her foot on the brakes and the car came to a dead stop.

Neddie began cussing aloud again. Krissy put her head in her hands. She had forgotten about the morning traffic jams. Giselle turned around in her seat so that she was facing the people in the back.

"There will be a short delay in today's activities and, hopefully," Giselle said in a happy tone, a big smile on her face, "if we get out of here in the next hour, one of you will still be alive, the other three being slaughtered horribly by Neddie."

"Shut up!" Neddie yelled and hit Giselle. Giselle fall back in her seat laughing. Five minutes later, they started moving. The going was slow, but at least they were moving, and Neddie seemed perfectly happy. That was, of course, until Ed came up to her window-in the middle of a major street-and asked, pitching his voice to be heard over the sound of passing cars and mufflers, "Can I come? Can I come?"

Krissy and Giselle were very proud of Neddie, though. She didn't scream or yell at Ed, only looked straight ahead at the traffic and said sharply, "NO!"

They picked up a little speed and now Ed was running along beside them yelling "Can I come, can I come, can I come, can I come?" Neddie forced herself to stare ahead and say one word to him only.

"No, no, no, no!!"

"Can I come?"

"No!"

"Can I come?"

"NO!"

"Can I come?"

"NO!!"

Just then, the traffic cleared and Nereyda didn't hesitate in the least to push down on the gas pedal with all her might. The last thing they heard of Ed was: "Can I-?" before they peeled out on the street. Neddie stuck her head out the window and screamed "NO!!!!!" before giving Ed the finger.

Krissy shook her head and Giselle laughed. Hermione, Ron, Harry, and Draco looked scared at the side of Neddie that only an encounter with Ed could bring out.

*****

Ed and Neddie History

"So...who's this 'Ed' character?" Hermione asked, trying to hide a smile. Giselle turned around in her seat almost immediately, a big grin on her face.

"Well," she said mysteriously.

"Ed was Neddie's very cute and so sweet boyfriend until a couple of months ago when she totally broke his heart-"

"I did not break his heart! I just told him that I thought it was best that we see other people but that we could still be friends!" Neddie said indigenously.

"Yeah, after you called him a __________," Giselle said turning back to Neddie.

"And before that didn't you call his mother and tell her that he was in jail because the police caught him with a hooker?" Krissy piped in.

"What, a girl can't play an innocent joke on her boyfriends mother?" Neddie asked innocently.

"Not when you send a hooker to his apartment and then call the cops just so that you won't feel bad about lying to her!!" Giselle cried out.

"Something tell me that you would not take kindly to a boyfriend who's cheated on you," Draco said from the back seat.

"But he didn't cheat on her. He never did anything to her!" Krissy said

"Yeah, he was always so sweet." Giselle wiped a fake tear off her cheek.

"He was so immature! I just couldn't continue to go out with a man who would walk around at the beach screaming out how big his nipples were!!" Neddie screamed out

"Hey, in his defense, it's not like he did that all the time," Krissy said trying to be practical.

"No, but when he wasn't doing that he was chasing old ladies down the street and screaming things like 'Where's little red riding hood' and 'I'm going to eat you' and while wearing a thick fur coat!! The guy was totally psycho. And he still thinks we're going out!" Nereyda said, trying to concentrate on the road lest they crash.

"Well, I can see you breaking up with someone because they were totally immature," Hermione said neutrally, giving Ron a very suspicious glance. "How long were you two going out?" Neddie sighed. She obviously didn't want to be having this conversation.

"For about a year."

"Wow. That's a long time," Draco said. He personally had never been able to keep a relationship going for more than a couple of months.

"Tell them when you broke up with him," Giselle said smugly.

Neddie sighed again. "On our anniversary."

*****

HIKE

The ride up to the hike site took about half an hour. When they all got out of the can Giselle told the group that it was supposed to take up to 50 minutes but in Neddie's mad rush to get away from Ed, they had made excellent time. The three tour guides opened the trunk of the car and pulled out backpacks, food, water, binoculars, sweaters and other things.

"What's all of that?" Hermione asked as Krissy and Giselle knelt on the floor and began putting everything in 7 separate backpacks.

"Things we're going to need while we're here," Neddie said, her voice muffled as she dug deeper into the trunk. She finally came back out of the trunk pulling a very big and heavy looking backpack out.

"What are we going to do here? Form a militia?" Draco asked as Neddie lugged the backpack out of the trunk and let it fall to the ground with a thump and then began to pull out more food which Krissy and Giselle shoved into the other, smaller backpacks.

Giselle giggled, "Don't be silly. Of course we're not," and she zipped up a backpack and tossed it at Draco. Draco, not knowing what she was going to do didn't realize when she threw the bag and it hit him hard in the stomach. Ron broke out laughing.

Neddie tossed a backpack to each person and picked one up herself. "Okay, everyone got their hats? There's a bottle of water in each pack along with some food, a pair of binoculars, some sunscreen and no magic."

The last words were spoken clearly and made the foreigners look at each other in desperation and they knew that she meant that they could not use magic while they were here. At all. As Ron strapped his pack to his back, he looked around the group.

"Hey, how come Krissy isn't carrying a bag?"

"Because Krissy has to lug the oversized seminary bag around," Krissy said with a sour look at Neddie as she heaved the pack on.

Giselle laughed. "It looks like Neddie's school backpack." Neddie stuck her tongue out at both of them and started walking.

Everyone except Draco followed. "You don't really expect me to do anything except lounge around on silk pillows all day, do you?"

Giselle turned around and walked backwards. "It's really up to you. But just know that it'll be a while before we come back."

Draco ran to catch up with Neddie. "Hey, how long do you think this will take. I have an appointment with the hotel manicurist at 4."

Neddie rolled her eyes but kept looking forward. "It'll take as long as it'll take and if you miss your appointment then oh well." She left little room for argument.

Draco sighed, "Fine. Can you at least tell us where we're going?"

"We're going to the Cola de Caballo," Giselle came up from behind Neddie.

"The what?" Hermione asked.

"Roughly translated it means the butt of a horse." Krissy panted from a little behind the group.

"Not the butt," Neddie said quickly, pretending not to be offended. "The tail. Cola means the tail."

"You're taking us to go see the backside of a horse?!" Ron said in astonishment

"I didn't dish out 5,000 dollars to see the ass of a donkey," Draco said, outraged.

"It's not the ass, it's not the butt and it's not a donkey!!" Neddie yelled. "It's a waterfall! Okay!? They just call it Cola de Caballo because it looks like the tail of a horse!! Alright?!"

"Why would you take us to see a waterfall that looks like the ass of a donkey?" Draco asked, confused but knowing that it would make Neddie mad to act so stupid.

"It's not the ass of a donkey!!!" Neddie screamed out.

Draco knew that he was in for a good pummeling and thought that it would hurt, too but at that moment Krissy screamed and everyone turned around just in time to see her fall over backwards.

"Oh my God, Krissy are you alright?" Giselle dropped Randy-who she had been carrying-and ran over to Krissy and helped her take off the backpack.

"I just have one question," Krissy said as she sat up and slipped the straps off her shoulders.

"Why do I have to carry the colossal man-purse?"

"Because you lost fair and square," Neddie said crossing her arms. "No I didn't!! It was a tie!!! I had picked 20 you had picked 10 and the number was 15!!" Krissy yelled at Neddie.

"Well, you went over! That means you lost!"

"HOW!!!"

Just then, Hermione stepped in. "Alright, that's enough. I didn't pay fifty dollars a day to hear the three of you argue. If I wanted that I could have stayed in Britain with ________ and ______ over there," she said, pointing a finger at Ron and Draco.

"Now, you two work this out or no stipend for you."

Neddie and Krissy looked at each other dubiously. After half a minute of them just staring at each other Krissy finally put the straps back on and prepared to get up.

"I'll take it-wouldn't want Neddie to break a nail." Neddie almost immediately started yelling at Krissy-threatening her with cockroaches and no lunch. Krissy began yelling back at her and taunting her, saying 'Ed is your boyfriend' in a singsong voice.

Giselle walked away shaking her head. "Leave them at it. If we're lucky we won't have to hear them until late tonight."

"Oh joy," Hermione mumbled.

Harry, Hermione, Ron, Draco and Giselle had left a bickering Neddie and Krissy behind not but a minute when, out of nowhere, they heard 'Krissy sucks for free!!!' and then a strangled yell, as if Krissy had just jumped on top of Neddie. About thirty seconds later a very pleased looking Krissy walked up to them, carrying the normal sized backpack that Neddie had been wearing.

"Shall we go on?" she asked, walking ahead of them.

Heavy panting made them turn around and they saw Neddie, bent almost double under the weight of the humongous backpack. She walked by them as if she didn't see them, cursing in Spanish under her breath. She suddenly yelled out something in Spanish to Krissy who flicked her off without turning around.

They marched behind one another for about 30 minutes annoyed by Draco's complaints about how unsanitary their surroundings were.

"What in the hell is that!" Draco stopped the group once more to point and make ew and ugh sounds.

"What are you going on about now Draco?" Krissy walked up to them happy because for once her back wasn't being crushed by the seminary bag, but yet annoyed by Draco's voice.

"Well since you're my guide please tell me what that is?"

Krissy looked closer and knew exactly what it was, "Well Draco that's a turd. Yeah I am thinking one of the animals had the runs and well when you got to go you got to go." Krissy smiled pleasantly at him and walked back to the front, giving a high five to Giselle. Ron and Harry heaped over in laughter and Hermione had the 'disapproving' look on her face.

"Well I knew that."

"Oh give it up Draco.you're such and idiot!" Ron managed to get out his words just before he started another fit of laughter. They started off again towards Neddie who was leading the way but was also still mad about the weight on her back in which (In her opinion) Krissy was supposed to be carrying. Ten minuets later a roll of water could be heard in the distance and a sweet smell caught their senses.

They took a turn and each was taken aback by the beauty and magnificence of the waterfall. The sun reflected the water making it glitter as it moved and the birds were singing their songs. The area was colored by flowers of all kinds and Hermione set to work trying to figure out what was what.

"This is so wonderful." Harry trailed off thinking that maybe he could make up a pick up line that compared the waterfall to Krissy.

"Well its really better at night Harry, that's when the moon makes everything seem so elegant and black." Krissy said to him with a smile and a wink. Harry was surprised and tried to wink back but was jabbed by Draco in the ribs.

"Dear lord Potter I think you really have gone mental this time! You have no idea how to get a girl do you," Draco whispered to him so that Krissy couldn't hear.

"Well Draco you should be talking right!"

"Hey I wasn't turned down! I will get her you'll see, and I'll do it before you can muster up the courage to talk to Krissy."

Neddie began to tell them the history of the waterfall and why it was named Cola de Caballo. Krissy and Giselle had always dreaded this part because they themselves had heard it many times. So they decided to go and check out the trail that led up the waterfall. Hermione, Draco, Ron, and Harry stood around Neddie while she told the tale and pointed at the spots where they took place.

"So any questions?" Neddie asked politely after finishing , the history of the waterfall.

"Yeah I have got one if you don't mind," said Draco instantly.

"Yes Draco what is it this time?" Neddie had been fed up with all of Draco's questions. He had interrupted her through out the whole history of the waterfall and quite frankly she was fed up with it.

"Well why the hell did those people name a beautiful waterfall after a horse's ass?" Draco had a calm smile on his face and knew that his question had pissed off the girl, but he didn't mind. He was going to make her suffer for making him stand out in the sun for so long. "Ahhhh!!!" Neddie turned away from the group and went to go find Giselle and Krissy. She was so mad she felt as if she was spewing smoke from her ears.

Meanwhile Harry was trying to figure out why Neddie hadn't killed Draco on the spot. "Draco, your so lucky that she didn't rip you to shreds." Harry looked at Draco who had still maintained his cool look, but inside was relieved that Neddie hadn't severed his head from his body.

"You know Draco I really think that your trying to make this trip a disaster! Why don't you suck up your damn spoiled pride and stop being such an asshole." Hermione angrily stormed off towards Neddie.

The boys stood stunned and surprised that Hermione had just cursed at Draco. Draco would've called back at her but he couldn't figure out what to say. Great Draco. Just Great. Well later tonight you'll have to apologize.

*****

"Hey Hermione!" Giselle had seen Hermione walking quickly in one direction.

"Oh hey Giselle. I was just looking for you guys," Hermione said.

Hermione came walking up to see that Randy was walking a couple of feet behind Giselle. It made Hermione wonder what exactly he was. I mean she couldn't figure out what Randy was and quite frankly it was killing her.

"Have you seen Neddie Giselle? You see I need to apologize to Neddie for something Draco said to her. He isn't all that bad but hey he is out in the sun and well he is cranky that he didn't go to his appointment" Hermione was still watching Randy with a curious expression. He seemed to have a star where his bellybutton should be that was very suspicious.

"No sorry Hermione but I was about to go look for them myself but I got kind of side tracked. But on another note Randy here has been having nightmares every night for about 2 weeks now and well I wanted to know if you could help him out." Giselle's face was full of concern and proceeded to pick up the small fur ball at her side.

"Well I don't know if I can do anything cause well I don't know what he is. I could do some type of research on him with your help but until I know what kind of animal he is I can't really help him." Hermione looked at the small little animal that was clinging to Giselle's bowling shirt.

"Well hey I would appreciate anything right now, so that would be great. Now, lets go find the rest of the group." Giselle led the way towards the others in the distance with Hermione following behind her.

*****

Neddie stood with Krissy trying to figure out the best trail up the waterfall and the boys were talking about what they would be eating tonight.

"Hey you know what I just realized?" Harry said on a somber note.

"What is it this time Potter? Did you finally find the best pick up line for Krissy," Draco asked him with a devilish grin.

"No Malfoy, I am actually still trying to work on that. Which reminds me I had really good one in mind but I--"

"HARRY!"

"Oh right what I meant to say is that well you defiantly have to apologize to Hermione Draco. If you don't we won't have any Advil or Tylenol to take after we eat."

Ron started laughing along with Draco, who had found this true but hilarious. Just then Harry stopped smiling and looked directly behind Ron and Draco. It took them a while to stop their laughs but Draco and Ron had caught the silence.

"She is behind us isn't she?" Draco turned around and put on a weak smile.

"I can't believe you all." Hermione turned on her heal still looking furious with the boys and went over to the Neddie, Krissy, and Giselle who were talking loudly at one another.

"Neddie it's getting kind of late! In my opinion it will be dark by the time we get up that waterfall!" Krissy was yelling at Neddie and Giselle was trying to figure out which side would prevail so that she could join it in the end of their bickering.

"You don't know that! I am the one that plans everything and I say that we can make it and come back before nightfall!" Neddie bellowed back.

"Neddie I think Krissy is right, I mean you still have to think about how long it will take to get back to the car, you know we won't have time before the sun sets" Giselle chimed in angelically hoping that Neddie wouldn't tear out her throat.

"Oh so now you're choosing her side!! Well fine then, but I have a little surprise." Neddie was red with anger and in need of revenge at the moment so she shouted out, "We are going to spend the night here!"

A/N: So there's the first chapter. Not that good, right? But the upcoming ones will be better. How much better we cannot honestly tell you. If you liked this one please tell us. And there is a plot behind this. It will come out later on and Randy (cute little Randy) is a big part of it. The next chapter will be out soon. Well, until the next chapter in Disease and Disaster or Doxology of Dragons--Later Days!!!!!!!!!!!