Wife Swap: Cullen's vs. Richards
INTRO: The Cullen's decide that to play the part of "being human" properly they must participate in outside activities with others. Each Cullen chooses one activity to take part in. Alice is choosing first. She joins up with Rosalie, Emmett, Bella and Jacob to plan stage one...
A/N: This is many years after Breaking Dawn. Jacob had imprinted on Nessie but it was never as strong as his love for Bella. No one ever knew why until they all went to the Volturi when Nessie had matured and she mated. On Alec. Jake's imprint had been broken and Nessie stayed with Alec. Jake kept with the Cullen's.
Alice POV:
I hope Jazzy doesn't mind that I never told him about this but Emmett is a big child so will know what to do. But he won't do anything without Rose. Bella will be a great help protecting our minds from Edward and Jake because Bella wouldn't do it without him.
I had decided, with a little help, that for our first part of being "normal", we would enter the TV program, Wife Swap! We had planned every single little detail, changed it so we were like a proper human family but as Emmett had pointed out, it was likely that things would change when the human entered our home. All we needed to do now was tell the family.
"Family meeting guys and quick, we don't have much time!"
"Alice, do you have to shout? We can hear you even if you whisper!"
"Because Eddie-kins this way we are more like a human family!"
Edward about to retort quickly hushed up as he saw Bella enter and instead of sitting with him went and sat with Emmett and Jacob.
Carlisle POV
I quickly made it back from work in time for the family meeting. As it happens I had heard Alice from the hospital but that's what you get when you're a vampire.
"OK guys, Alice here has something she would like to tell us and guessing from the positions in the table and Edwards face, there are other people involved and Edward can't read minds", Carlisle started the meeting off as usual sitting at the head of the table with Esme on his left.
"Ha ha Eddie-kins can't read minds anymore aww boo hoo."
"Can it Emmett. Right as you all know we are participating in activities with humans since we all have exceptional control-
"Except from me who doesn't need blood to survive" put in Jacob.
"- and to show that we can be a human family. I needed some help with perfecting my idea and I obviously had some willing participants."
"Yeah we were sooo willing. You took away our cell phones!"
"Shh. Anyway my idea has been finalised and everything has been sorted so you can't back away-"
"Come on Ali just tell them already" Bella was jumping up and down in excitement.
"- we are going on the reality TV show Wife Swap!"
I was stunned. That was an understatement. Wife Swap? Have a human in our house for two weeks while my Esme went somewhere that could be sunny? I think we need some extra information.
"Well that was shocking but Alice tell us some more, why can't we withdraw our application?"
"Umm because Emmett and Rose sent off the video and we received the acceptance letter yesterday. All we need to do is send off the form that lets them know about the family in writing and they're ready to go! Rose has all the details about how to pull it off."
I turned to Rose who would always know more.
"Well we had to say a cover story so I'm going to tell you that and then Bella will tell you everything else. Basically you're a doctor at the local hospital and you've been married to Esme for 14 years. She found out she couldn't have children and you adopted. Children in range of adoption: Edward 18, Alice 17, Jasper 18, Rosalie 18, Emmett 18, Jacob 17, Isabella 17. Edward and Alice are siblings, Jasper and Rosalie are twins, Emmett and Bella are cousins and Bella and Jacob are best friends. We all attend the local high school and are vegetarians."
I was sure they would have forgotten something but no, it all seems pretty good. Then it was Bella's turn.
"Right to make sure that we are seen as a proper human family, things will go like this for those two weeks: There are no couples in the family and we are changing the rooms around. If you even think about sneaking around at night there will be trouble because we have to do this for ourselves. Some nights you will get leeway because you will have a "special bond" with your mate so you are like best friends. The rooms will go like this:
Edward and Emmett on the second floor in Edward's room
Jacob and Jasper on the second floor in Jasper's room
Bella, Rosalie and Alice on the third floor in the second master bedroom
We get a bigger room and a floor to ourselves because we can be trusted and there is more room. Obviously Jacob's room will be used as a wardrobe- sorry Jake- and Rose can keep half of her clothes in the wardrobe in her room. Apart from Jasper, if at any time you need to "sleep" elsewhere then you can go to your own room and Jacob can either go in the spare room or any other room that is not being used.
Also there has to be some sibling rivalry and I'm sure you want to know why Edward and Jake aren't sharing and this is the reason:
Alice, Rose and Bella are best friends
Jacob and Emmett and Jasper are great friends
Jacob and Edward not so great friends
You guys can do the math and work out what you will be mainly fighting over.
Depending on what the human is like will depend on how bad our behaviour is but we five have been very busy and we have planned everything to every extreme.
We will be having petty arguments every day which will usually be on our clothing, hair, makeup and what cars to take to school. Oh and by the way when Ali and I have finished helping Esme with the manual she has to write then you guys will need to read it in order to have a clear view on the cover story."
And with that she sat down as if she was tired. I was speechless. They had thought of everything they could have done and more! There was nothing I could do or say to stop them.
"Let's do it then."
Alice POV
Yes! I was so excited! I knew he would say yes! Oh no look at Esme's face!
Esme POV
Oh dear God. I want to do it but knowing I'll have to live with at least two people means that I'll have to be the fully quenched all the time. This is going to be hard.
I'll miss my children so much. I never thought I would think of Jake as one of my own but I do, even if he is a shape shifter. And Carlisle. Oh Carlisle. My soul reason for living, the only reason I have seen the past decades and seen my son find his one true love and see Jake join us when his instincts say to kill. It's weird but in his features I see my own son the only son I ever called mine in every way.
OK calm down Esme. It's only two weeks. Two weeks when I have years and years. I mean I'm a vampire! I can do this!
"Ali we need to fill out that application don't we?"
Bella jumped in quickly, I've never seen her so excited except for when Jacob decided to stick with us after Nessie left.
"Yes, yes Esme! I'll go get it!"