He was kissing her.
Here she was, in the most romantic setting a girl could imagine. And she was here with the guy that girls had fawned over, that even she had fallen for. And he was kissing her. So why did she feel so cold, so lonely?
Her heart had jumped when he had asked her out. She didn't know that she could still get so excited over a guy. She thought that there was nothing left but ice in her heart. After that event that had scarred her. But she was still scarred; going out on this date had not changed that. She felt nothing now; no passion or love. She was numb, too numb to push away. He was kissing her.
It was not an unpleasant kiss. No slobbering or groping. It was sweet and it was tender, but it was empty… meaningless. Why was it so meaningless? Shouldn't she be happy? She had finally gotten what she thought she wanted. She had been vindicated. This was proof that she was not an ugly girl.
Was that all she wanted? Vindication? Suddenly she felt dirty. The numbness was gone and replaced with a feeling of intense regret. She pushed him, hard… so hard that he almost fell over backward.
"Sunako!" He yelped as he tried to regain his balance. "What's your problem?"
"I can't do this. This is meaningless, it's less than meaningless. My first kiss had more meaning than this and I was not even in my right mind then." Then she left him without saying another word. She walked away without looking back. She knew he must be staring, shocked. He must think she's crazy, but she didn't care.
Her kisses and her love had value, even if she was the only one who thought so. Never again would she give it away so cheaply.
As she left her junior high school crush gaping at her retreating back, she wondered if Kyohei was still awake. Maybe he would stay up with her and watch a movie…