Harry woke up on a gloomy December Friday morning to the sounds of something pecking on the window. It was Hedwig. She was pecking so loud that she woke up Ron.
"Sheesh, what's all the racket for?" he muttered, still half asleep.
"Chill out, it's only Hedwig," said Harry as he ran over to open the window.
Hedwig flew in, bringing in a cold breeze with her, and dropped a letter on his bed. This got Ron's attention.
"Who's the letter from?" he asked curiously, now sitting up in bed.
"Does it look like I've read the letter yet?"
Harry went over to his bed and picked up the letter and read who it was addressed to.
"You're in luck, it's for YOU!"
Ron bolted out of bed and grabbed the letter out of Harry's hand.
"Hmmm... quite suspicious." He shook the letter.
"It's probably from Percy or someone unpleasant like that; just open it!" said Harry impatiently.
Ron carefully opened the envelope. And then --
BOOM!
"ARRRGGGHHHHH!!!!!"
The letter exploded in Ron's face, leaving green goo all over his body, as well as half the dormitory.
The explosion was so loud it woke up Neville, Seamus and Dean.
"What the heck --" said Seamus, startled.
"Uh, oh," mumbled Dean.
"Someone's going to pay for this," said Ron, practically smoking from the ears with rage, as he took out a piece of slime-covered paper from within the envelope.
"FRED! GEORGE!"
Harry should have known. Fred and George were looking to get revenge on Ron after he let it slip to Percy that it had been Fred and George who had sent him the dragon guts as a birthday present.
"You called Ronniekins?" said a voice from the vicinity of the doorway; it was Fred, followed closely by George. They had huge smirks on their faces and had their arms crossed.
"I'm going to get you," Ron yelled as he lunged at Fred, but Harry and Dean grabbed him around the neck of his pajamas, pulling him back.
"Leave it, Ron," said Harry, half wanting to laugh, but he couldn't.
"Good job, Harry, we don't want Ron to get another little, uh -- surprise by mail, now do we, Ron?" asked George innocently.
Ron responded by growling, sounding quite like a vicious dog ready to attack an intruder; Harry was sure that's what Ron's intentions were.
"GET OUT!!" he bellowed.
"Don't get your undies in a twist... we'll be off now," said Fred, and he and George left.
"Oh, I can't BELIEVE them!" Ron shouted in fury, waving his arms everywhere.
Harry silently thought that Ron should have seen this coming. After all, Fred and George DID tell him that if he let it slip to Percy what they were doing, he'd pay for it. And that was his payment.
"Well, no point in going back to bed now," Ron said bitterly. "I'm getting dressed."
Harry glanced at his watch, it was seven o'clock, and he did have more time to sleep, but decided to stay up with Ron -- make sure he didn't commit murder and end up in Azkaban or something along those lines.
"Well," said Neville sheepishly, "if you guys don't mind, I think I'll go back to bed." He looked scared that Ron might try to kill him if he did just that.
Ron did nothing but glare at him; Neville wasted no time and jumped into his bed and threw the covers over his head. Dean and Seamus saw that as their chance to jump back into bed too, before Ron got any ideas.
Without another thought, Ron began stripping and looking for his robes.
"RON!" yelled Harry in shock.
"What?" he called without looking at Harry, "Where's my bloody underwear? Darn."
Before he had a chance to see anything else, Harry bolted out of their dormitory, still in his own pajamas. He ran down the stairs to what he thought was an empty common room, until he saw Hermione.
"What are you doing up so early?" she asked, without looking up from a huge book she was reading.
"Didn't you hear an explosion?" he asked. "Fred and George sent Ron a Grimmick's Green Goo Greeting and it exploded all over him."
Hermione suppressed a giggle. "Really? That's what that big boom was?"
"Er, yeah, Ron's pretty peeved about it."
"Well, wouldn't you be?" asked Hermione, throwing Harry a quick grin. "Why did you come bolting down here? You sounded like a charging horse."
"Oh, that... Ron was uh... not thinking and er -- sort of started to change in front of me." After he said that, Harry thought it would have been better to just keep quiet.
Hermione shot her head up. "WHAT?"
"He probably wasn't thinking straight -- cause of being so angry." Harry felt his face heating up.
Harry thought he distinctively heard Hermione say under her breath, "If only I could have been there..." but he didn't wish to press the issue.
Ron came down a few moments later, still looking rather murderous, and once Hermione caught a glimpse of him she said, "Ooh, I think I'll head down to breakfast early," and she jetted for the portrait hole.
"What's up with her?" asked Ron.
"You don't wanna know," mumbled Harry. He really didn't though, Harry thought.
People were starting to filter into the common room and Harry realized his stomach was rumbling.
"I'm going to get dressed now," Harry said to Ron. "Then we can head down to breakfast."
Harry bolted back up the stairs, got dressed (within the confines of his four-poster with its hangings CLOSED) and bolted back down the stairs to see Ron chatting with Colin Creevey. Ron had a mean face on.
Colin spotted Harry. "Harry! Hi Harry! I was just telling Ron... do you wanna come to my party tonight?"
Harry shot a look to Ron, who looked like he wanted to burst out laughing. Colin was good for some things then, Harry thought.
"Er... well, Colin -- I uh... what about you, Ron?" And Harry shot another look at Ron, who looked stumped.
"We're studying for Snape's exam in the library, Harry, don't you remember?" said Ron, winking at him so Colin couldn't see.
"Right. That's it, I mean -- that's what I'm doing tonight."
"Oh, are you sure? It's going to be a blast, Harry, I'm asking everyone to come," said Colin with a pleading look on his face.
"Sorry, Colin, but we can't not study for Snape's exams," Harry lied. Ron was hiding his face; he was practically crying with laughter.
Colin looked postively crushed that Harry couldn't attend his party. "Oh, all right then, Harry. Later, Harry!" And he stormed off to another corner of the common room.
"Is he for real?" asked Ron in disbelief. "A party?"
Harry was quite amused by this as well.
"Think anyone will go?"
"Are we?" asked Ron with his eye brows raised. "Be more of a tea party than anything, complete with cookies and milk."
"I could do with some cookies and milk right now; I'm starving," said Harry, and they picked up the pace towards the Great Hall.
They made it down to the Great Hall, and started walking down to the end of Gryffindor table when something odd about half way down caught their attention.
It was Parvati and Lavender teaching what looked like a provocative dance routine to -- WOOD!
They were in the aisle on the other side of the table and there was Lavender going "And one and two and three and four... that's it, Oliver, shake it a little bit more."
Ron stared at them with his jaw dropped.
"No, no, Oliver... turn to the left," yelled out Parvati.
"I'm TRYING, I obviously wasn't blessed with the talent of rhythm," said Wood in frustration.
"Just work the hips," Lavender hissed.
It was odd, Harry thought, that no one else was looking at them. But yet, he and Ron stood on the spot and were openly staring at the three of them.
"Work it, Oliver, come on!"
"I'M TRYING!"
Wood was obviously not doing a good a job as Parvati and Lavender wanted him to.
"Going to stare all day, are you?" came a voice. It was Hermione. "Sit down, will you two?" Harry and Ron went down to the end of the table and sat down.
"What has gotten in to them," Harry asked Hermione, still staring at Parvati, Lavender and Wood.
"Just practicing," she said simply.
"For what?" added Ron.
However, she did not answer. She kept her face to her plate and kept on eating.
During their time at breakfast, Harry and Ron spotted a number of extremely strange things:
The biggest had to be Colin and Justin Finch-Fletchley at the Slytherin table, chatting with none other than Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle. They were talking about something going on at eight o'clock; and they kept laughing and writing on a scrap of paper on the table.
Harry heard Malfoy say, "Yeah, yeah and then we can play..." Harry then looked at Ron, who did nothing but shrug.
Then, Harry heard Colin say, "You're my hero, Malfoy." With that, Ron dropped his glass of pumpkin juice all over him.
"ARRRGGGHHHH!!" He jumped up from his seat.
Trying not to laugh at Ron, again, Harry directed his attention over to the Ravenclaw table. And there was Cho with -- HERMIONE!! Wasn't she just sitting with them?
"AHHHHHH!"
Not only was she with Hermione, but Pansy Parkinson and Angelina Johnson; they also were deep in conversation. Harry's eyes were now almost coming out of his head. Why hadn't Hermione told him she was friendly with Cho?
"This is straaaange," said Ron in disbelief, trying to clean his robes with a napkin. "When did Hogwarts merge and when did you stop being Creevey's hero, Harry?"
Just then they were interrupted by Lavender.
"NO, OLIVER! Shake it to the right, that's right... do it again!"
"I'm getting out of here," said Ron, and Harry followed close behind. Walking towards the door they spotted Fred, George, Lee and -- Neville deep in conversation, as well.
The last thing Harry heard was Cho laugh and then say, "Yes, that'll make the boys eyes bug out all right!" Ron had to practically drag Harry out of the Great Hall after that one.
"Noooo... I wanna stay!" Harry was trying to fight his way back inside.
"No, you don't," and Ron continued to drag him out.
"Something strange is going on," Harry concluded, now giving up so Ron could let go of him.
"Oh, really? Ya think?" said Ron sarcastically.
"Think this has to do with Colin's party?"
"Colin's party? Ha."
Harry and Ron headed down to the dungeons for Potions. True, they were early, but maybe all this strangeness had infected Snape and he wouldn't get on their nerves. They were very wrong. In all honesty, everyone seemed to be getting along with each other, minus Harry and the Ron.
Parvati and Lavender had their heads together with Malfoy; and Neville was conversing with Crabbe and Goyle about something. Just then, Hermione ran in.
"Wow, thought I'd be late." She threw her books down and sat down next to Ron.
"What were you talking about with Cho?" asked Harry. He couldn't hold it in.
"Oh... that -- nothing important," she said as she started to unload books from her bag.
"That's a lie, Hermione, something strange is going on," said Ron, cutting in.
"Is there? I haven't noticed anything," said Hermione.
"Hermione, you were with PANSY, talking with her... her and Cho and Angelina, what's up with that?" continued Harry.
"Nothing."
---
Potions was just as torturous as any day, so the strangeness hadn't softened Snape one bit. History of Magic was a bore. And Harry got a good sleep during Divination. When he and Ron headed down to the Great Hall for lunch, nothing had changed since that morning.
"HERMIONE!" Ron yelled as he spotted her, now helping Lavender and Parvati teach Wood his dance routine.
Hermione did nothing but throw a little wave at him.
Cho was no where to be found though, neither was Pansy or Angelina. Fred, George and Lee were now at the SLYTHERIN table, discussing something with Malfoy and a few random Slytherins.
"FRED! GEORGE!" Ron yelled again, in shock this time. They turned around and gave Ron the same fake wave as Hermione did, and returned to their conversation with Malfoy.
Harry was in disbelief, too. "Ron, something is wrong. Very wrong."
"No shit, Sherlock."
They sat down, downed their lunch and left quickly as possible. As they were walking by Wood, he was yelling out, "Do the hustle!" and doing a poor version of what the three girls had just taught him.
"No rhythm," Parvati whispered to Lavender and Hermione.
Their last class was Transfiguration. Even McGonagall didn't notice they sudden merge of the Slytherins and the Gryffindors, minus Harry and Ron. When Transfiguration ended, they saw Colin in the doorway and he ran up to Malfoy the second the bell had rung. When Harry and Ron passed them, they looked extremely excited.
Harry and Ron decided to skip dinner in order to avoid anymore strange sightings of Wood trying to dance and Colin being friendly with Malfoy -- it was scarying the hell out of them, all for different reasons. It was around six o'clock and they decided to just roam around the castle, as risky as it may have seemed.
"I seriously could not stomach another glimpse of what may be going on," said Ron as they were walking down an abandoned corridor.
"Tell me about it. Any ideas of what might have gotten into them? asked Harry.
"Nope, not a clue, but I hope whatever the heck is messing those people up doesn't mess me up; I might become friends with Malfoy -- I couldn't bear the thought."
Ron continued to blabber on.
"And what about him and Colin? Him and my BROTHERS? They're always looking to blow up Malfoy or something."
That was very true, Harry thought, especially when it came to Quidditch matches against Slytherin. The Weasley twins always hoped to send a Bludger straight into Malfoy's rat face. They had always been unsuccessful.
"Did you see Hermione with Cho?" Harry blurted out, hoping to discuss some of his problems now.
"Yeah, I saw that, very strange. Very strange."
They walked about for what seemed like over an hour and then they decided to head down to the Great Hall to see if every one was gone -- and if there was any food left.
As they were approaching the entrance --
"DAMN IT, OLIVER! Shake what your momma gave ya!" yelled Parvati or Lavender, Harry couldn't tell which.
"I don't think so..." Ron said in exasperation and they headed in the opposite direction, still walking, and hopeful to avoid Filch.
"Good thinking, I don't want to see Wood try to shake it anymore, I think I'd be sick if I did," said Harry, disgusted.
"Parvati and Lavender should have given up long ago -- I would have; actually I would have never even tried."
"Same here."
No sooner had Harry finished his sentence when Parvati, Lavender and Wood came bolting down the corridor Harry and Ron were currently walking down.
"Crap, we're late," yelled Wood as the three of them flew by like black blurs.
Harry and Ron turned to watch Parvati, Lavender and Wood's bodies fall from sight.
"Something's up; it's Colin's party, I'm telling you," said Harry. If it wasn't Colin's party, he had no idea what was going on then.
"Harry, be logical now, are you starting to go loco, too?"
Harry didn't answer, instead, he looked at his watch. "It's twenty past eight, think we should go have a look?"
"Well, it's in our Common Room, isn't it?" said Ron sarcastically, obviously not wanting to be seen anywhere near Colin's "party."
They turned around and went in the direction Parvati, Lavender and Wood had just raced down. They were approaching the hall that led to the Common Room when --
"Do you hear pounding?" asked Ron curiously. They turned the corner.
"What the HELL?!" yelled Harry, spotting a very large, blinking neon sign above the portrait of the Fat Lady that read...
CLUB CREEVEY
They approached the portrait gingerly, afraid to get any closer. There was definitely something going on inside.
"Well, are you two going to join the festivities?" said the Fat Lady, and she opened her portrait without even asking for the password.
Harry and Ron stared.
"I don't think we're in Gryffindor Tower anymore, Dororthy," said Ron, his jaw drooping.
They walked in.
"One Sickle," came a low grunt. It was... CRABBE?
"Get out of our Common Room!" said Ron fiercely.
"Can't," said Goyle, "we got bouncer duty."
"Bouncer duty?" said Harry and Ron in unison.
"One Sickle to enter Club Creevey."
"This is OUR Common room, let us in," yelled Harry.
"Oh, Ron, stop being a prat and give them a Sickle." It was Fred at the top of the spiral staircase.
Harry and Ron each threw a Sickle at Goyle and walked into the room they used to be able to enter for free.
"Ron, I'm scared."
The place resembled a night club more than anyone else, there was music and everyone was dancing. Then, a voice came over a sound system:
"Yo, yo, yo!"
Harry looked up. It was none other than Colin himself, standing on a stage at the opposite end of where they were standing.
"I'd like to welcome everyone to my cozy little get together. First, I'd like to thank my DJ's for the wickedly wicked music we got here... DJ Dray-Ko and DJ Hustlin' Justin."
Harry and Ron looked around and spotted the DJ's on another smaller stage.
"You have got to be kidding me! MALFOY AND JUSTIN!" cried out Ron.
"Thank you, my Homie G," said Malfoy, decked out in baggy jeans and a baggy T-shirt (so was Justin). "Are you ready to blow the roof off this joint or what?"
The crowd responded. "THE ROOF, THE ROOF, THE ROOF IS ON FIRE!"
"Awwwww yeeeeeaaaaah," Justin yelled over the sound system. The crowded repeated what he said.
Harry and Ron had hardly walked an inch when they spotted something that would give them nightmares for years to come.
"AHHH! WOOD!" It all made sense to Harry now, as unpleasant as it was.
In large cages, dangling fifteen feet above the crowd, were Parvati, Lavender and Wood, in what looked like spandex suits, doing the same routine Harry and Ron has seem them doing all day in the Great Hall.
"I think I'm going to be sick," choked Ron, staring up at them. Wood was having a hard time adjusting, his head kept hitting the top of the cage.
"Now," said Colin over the sound system, "I'd like also like to thank my three awesome cage dancers, dancing high above us: Lavender, Parvati and Wood. Shake what your momma give ya, Wood!" The crowd howled with laughter.
"And, of course, my four fab pole dancers."
Pole dancers? Harry thought. Where? He was searching rapidly around the room --
"AAHHH!! HERMIONE!!" croaked Ron.
"AAHHH!! CHO!!" cried Harry.
The pole dancers were in fact Hermione, Cho, Pansy and Angelina. They were doing provocative dance moves around their poles -- looking much like strippers in a strip club. It was Harry's dreams coming true, in a public sort of way.
"Hi Harry! Hi Ron!" yelled Hermione, dangling upside down with her legs wrapped around the pole.
Cho stuck her tongue out at Harry.
---
Harry and Ron, still in their school robes, were definitely not dressed for the occasion. Harry saw Ernie Macmillan dance by in a wifebeater with Hannah Abbott, who had on a tube top and booty shorts. Lee Jordan was wearing a toga and Seamus was strutting around in tight leather pants.
"Ewww," muttered Ron, spotting Seamus.
Right after Seamus danced away, they decided to go upstairs and drop their cloaks off. They ran through the crowd, up the stairs and met Fred, George and Lee at the top of the stairs. They all had smug looks on their faces
"Howdy, kids!" said Fred excitedly. "Good party, eh?"
"Why aren't you three down with the others weirdos?" asked Harry.
"Oh," said George, winking at Fred and Lee, "we're the Love Squad, we have to guard the Love Domain."
"The what?" asked Ron. Then, Harry noticed they were guarding the door to their dormitory. This didn't look right.
"What's going on in there?" asked Harry suspiciously.
Even before they answered, Ron began to try to push his way through Fred, George and Lee to no avail, but did get a peak into their room.
"DEAN!! GET OUT OF MY BED!! UGGGHHH!!"
Dean was in fact in there, but not alone. He and some random Ravenclaw girl were doing the nasty in Ron's bed, with the curtains open. There seemed to be a couple in Neville's bed, as well.
"GET IN YOUR OWN BED, DEAN!" Ron bellowed as he tried to push his way through.
"Now, now, Ron, the Love Domain is only for those who intend to make a lil' love; you can head back downstairs now," said Fred, laughing, pointing to the stairs.
Once again, Harry grabbed Ron around his collar and dragged him down the stairs, for fear he might have whipped out his wand and cast one of the Unforgivable Curses on Fred and George. So much for dropping off their cloaks.
At the bottom of the stairs they saw Neville, working as bartender?
"NEVILLE! You're serving alcohol?" Ron yelled in surprise, he eyes drifting over to Hermione's pole.
"I didn't want to, but Colin couldn't find anyone else for the job," he said glumly. "And it's only butterbeer with rum or something, dunno really, I just put it in."
"EVERYBOOOOODY, it's time for the MONSTER MASH!" yelled out Malfoy and the crowd started cheering as he played the song...
"He did the mash, the Monster Mash..." the song went.
Harry and Ron moved around the crowd, trying to not get too close to the dance floor where they were afraid of getting randomly grinded by some random person. Harry swore he saw Seamus and Ernie doing their thang. Harry moved closer to the wall.
Just then, without notice --
BOOM! WHAM! PLOP!
Wood fell into his cage door and plummeted the twenty feet into the crowd below.
"I give up," he yelled in disgust.
"Oliver, get your ass back in your cage, right now!" screamed Lavender. "Do you want me to use THIS?" She held up a whip. Wood got back in his cage.
They continued to walk around the floor and ended up near Hermione's pole, when she spotted them she took a break.
"Phew," she said as she wiped her forehead, "I'm exhausted! These moves are way more intricate than I thought they would be."
"Why didn't you tell us about this?" asked Harry.
"Well, you turned down Colin's invitation, right? So, why do you care?" she asked with a mischievous smile.
Ron responded by staring at Hermione in her spandex suit.
"Pig." she said simply, and got back to her pole work, purposely hitting Ron in the face with one of her flying legs.
"Attention. Attention," said Justin over the sound system, "it's time for a new song, everyone's favorite party song -- THRILLER! Do the monster moves if you know, peeps!"
Just then the portrait door opened, and it was DUMBLEDORE!
"Oh crap!" mumbled Ron, expecting everyone in the room to get expelled on the spot.
Malfoy cut in through the music. "Hey, Professor, mind doing some moves for us?" The crowd began cheering.
"It would be my great delight to entertain you fine party people with some moves I learned in my youth," he said as he walked towards the middle of the dance floor, the crowd parting as he made his way through. Harry and Ron ran to the stairs to stand on to get a good view.
"What is he going to do?" asked Ron.
Harry shrugged.
Without any introduction, Dumbledore broke out into a break dance, his cap flying off his head and smacking Neville in the face.
"GO ALBUS! GO ALBUS! GO ALBUS! IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY!" the crowd cheered as Dumbledore did his thing on the floor.
Ron stared with an open mouth. "Oh - my - God..."
Dumbledore continued to break dance until his beard go wrapped around his ankle and he had to end the spectacle. "That will be all."
He continued to jump onto the DJ's stage, took out his wand and started to shooting thongs out of it. Seamus went diving for a purple one and crash landed on top of Padma Patil, who looked disgusted with her sister. AFter that little free-for-all, Dumbledore jumped off the stage and headed for the portrait hole...
"Professor..." Harry yelled, running towards him.
"Ah, Harry, no need to worry," he said, "What the Heads of House don't know, won't hurt them." He winked and stocked through the portrait hole and left.
"What was THAT?" Harry asked.
Ron did nothing but gasp like a fish out of water.
As Harry was trying to digest what he just saw, Colin turned up, in a long, white fur coat, a white top hat, and a walking stick. He looked thrilled.
"Harry, oh, Harry! I'm so happy you turned up!" and he hugged Harry. "You too, Ron," and he hugged Ron, too. Then he left without another word.
Dumbledore breakdancing and Colin hugging him, that was enough to permanently scar Harry for life, he thought.
"For Christ's sake, Draco, we need some real music here!" yelled out someone over the sound system. It was Pansy, leaving her pole and making her way to the DJ stage. Malfoy looked scared. "Who wants some REAL music?" The crowd howled.
Pansy whipped out her wand, said some unheard words and the music changed from "Thriller," to "Hot In Herre'" as everyone knows, that classic Nelly hit.
The crowd went wild and started singing along: "It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes. I'm am getting so high, I will take my clothes off."
And with that, people actually started taking their clothes off and throwing them into the air. Along with Dumbledore's hat, Neville got hit the face with a leather bra. He ducked behind his bar and stayed down there to avoid anymore flying undergarments.
"AHHHHHHH!!" yelled out Harry and Ron in unison.
Ron jumped on top of Neville's bar to try to get a glimpse of Hermione, but slipped on some butterbeer and went crashing down to the floor, on top of Neville.
"BLOODY HELL!" Harry heard him yell.
Harry didn't know what to do, except stand where he was, out of the line of fire. Seamus was now fighting with Padma for the thong; Dean came waltzing down the stairs, buttoning his pants; Cho and Pansy were grinding on each other and Colin was in a mini-mosh pit, moving all over the crowd. Fred and George came down the stairs, leaving Lee to guard the Love Domain, and joined the mosh pit.
Then, right when Harry wanted it all to end, it did...
"WHAT IS GOING ON IN HERE?" yelled a shocked voice. It was McGonagall. Oh, no, thought Harry. Then, it got even worse, Snape came right behind her. He looks utterly nauseous.
"Hey, Snape, PONY RIDE!" yelled Fred, and he jumped on Snape's back.
"ARRGGHH, get off, Weasley!"
McGonagall then took out her wand and said some sort of spell, and the stage, the cages, the poles and everything related to the party disappeared; leaving Malfoy and Justin to fall to the ground.
"Please, Professor, the party was only getting started!" pleaded Colin.
"Is this your doing, Creevey?" she asked him, her eyes wide. "DETENTION! FOR THE REMAINDER OF THE SCHOOL YEAR!"
She used her wand to make Colin's ridiculous get-up disappear.
"BED! NOW!"
Slowly by slowly, all the Slytherins, Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws marched out through the portrait hole, looking very disappointed. Soon, only those left were the bummed out Gryffindors.
"Phew, I'm glad that's over," said Ron sounding relieved.
"Me too," said Harry in agreement.
Hermione, Dean, Neville and Seamus joined Harry and Ron and began to walk up the stairs to their dormitories.
"Hermione, what was up with you?" Ron asked. "You were wild!"
"Oh, really?" she said, still with that mischievous look in her eye.
"YES!"
Hermione turned to the remaining boys.
"Do you guys mind chilling out her for a while?"
"Why?" they all asked slowly.
Hermione proceeded to jump on Ron's back and drag him into his dormitory.
"Love Domain time," and she slammed the door in their faces.
"Sheesh, what's all the racket for?" he muttered, still half asleep.
"Chill out, it's only Hedwig," said Harry as he ran over to open the window.
Hedwig flew in, bringing in a cold breeze with her, and dropped a letter on his bed. This got Ron's attention.
"Who's the letter from?" he asked curiously, now sitting up in bed.
"Does it look like I've read the letter yet?"
Harry went over to his bed and picked up the letter and read who it was addressed to.
"You're in luck, it's for YOU!"
Ron bolted out of bed and grabbed the letter out of Harry's hand.
"Hmmm... quite suspicious." He shook the letter.
"It's probably from Percy or someone unpleasant like that; just open it!" said Harry impatiently.
Ron carefully opened the envelope. And then --
BOOM!
"ARRRGGGHHHHH!!!!!"
The letter exploded in Ron's face, leaving green goo all over his body, as well as half the dormitory.
The explosion was so loud it woke up Neville, Seamus and Dean.
"What the heck --" said Seamus, startled.
"Uh, oh," mumbled Dean.
"Someone's going to pay for this," said Ron, practically smoking from the ears with rage, as he took out a piece of slime-covered paper from within the envelope.
"FRED! GEORGE!"
Harry should have known. Fred and George were looking to get revenge on Ron after he let it slip to Percy that it had been Fred and George who had sent him the dragon guts as a birthday present.
"You called Ronniekins?" said a voice from the vicinity of the doorway; it was Fred, followed closely by George. They had huge smirks on their faces and had their arms crossed.
"I'm going to get you," Ron yelled as he lunged at Fred, but Harry and Dean grabbed him around the neck of his pajamas, pulling him back.
"Leave it, Ron," said Harry, half wanting to laugh, but he couldn't.
"Good job, Harry, we don't want Ron to get another little, uh -- surprise by mail, now do we, Ron?" asked George innocently.
Ron responded by growling, sounding quite like a vicious dog ready to attack an intruder; Harry was sure that's what Ron's intentions were.
"GET OUT!!" he bellowed.
"Don't get your undies in a twist... we'll be off now," said Fred, and he and George left.
"Oh, I can't BELIEVE them!" Ron shouted in fury, waving his arms everywhere.
Harry silently thought that Ron should have seen this coming. After all, Fred and George DID tell him that if he let it slip to Percy what they were doing, he'd pay for it. And that was his payment.
"Well, no point in going back to bed now," Ron said bitterly. "I'm getting dressed."
Harry glanced at his watch, it was seven o'clock, and he did have more time to sleep, but decided to stay up with Ron -- make sure he didn't commit murder and end up in Azkaban or something along those lines.
"Well," said Neville sheepishly, "if you guys don't mind, I think I'll go back to bed." He looked scared that Ron might try to kill him if he did just that.
Ron did nothing but glare at him; Neville wasted no time and jumped into his bed and threw the covers over his head. Dean and Seamus saw that as their chance to jump back into bed too, before Ron got any ideas.
Without another thought, Ron began stripping and looking for his robes.
"RON!" yelled Harry in shock.
"What?" he called without looking at Harry, "Where's my bloody underwear? Darn."
Before he had a chance to see anything else, Harry bolted out of their dormitory, still in his own pajamas. He ran down the stairs to what he thought was an empty common room, until he saw Hermione.
"What are you doing up so early?" she asked, without looking up from a huge book she was reading.
"Didn't you hear an explosion?" he asked. "Fred and George sent Ron a Grimmick's Green Goo Greeting and it exploded all over him."
Hermione suppressed a giggle. "Really? That's what that big boom was?"
"Er, yeah, Ron's pretty peeved about it."
"Well, wouldn't you be?" asked Hermione, throwing Harry a quick grin. "Why did you come bolting down here? You sounded like a charging horse."
"Oh, that... Ron was uh... not thinking and er -- sort of started to change in front of me." After he said that, Harry thought it would have been better to just keep quiet.
Hermione shot her head up. "WHAT?"
"He probably wasn't thinking straight -- cause of being so angry." Harry felt his face heating up.
Harry thought he distinctively heard Hermione say under her breath, "If only I could have been there..." but he didn't wish to press the issue.
Ron came down a few moments later, still looking rather murderous, and once Hermione caught a glimpse of him she said, "Ooh, I think I'll head down to breakfast early," and she jetted for the portrait hole.
"What's up with her?" asked Ron.
"You don't wanna know," mumbled Harry. He really didn't though, Harry thought.
People were starting to filter into the common room and Harry realized his stomach was rumbling.
"I'm going to get dressed now," Harry said to Ron. "Then we can head down to breakfast."
Harry bolted back up the stairs, got dressed (within the confines of his four-poster with its hangings CLOSED) and bolted back down the stairs to see Ron chatting with Colin Creevey. Ron had a mean face on.
Colin spotted Harry. "Harry! Hi Harry! I was just telling Ron... do you wanna come to my party tonight?"
Harry shot a look to Ron, who looked like he wanted to burst out laughing. Colin was good for some things then, Harry thought.
"Er... well, Colin -- I uh... what about you, Ron?" And Harry shot another look at Ron, who looked stumped.
"We're studying for Snape's exam in the library, Harry, don't you remember?" said Ron, winking at him so Colin couldn't see.
"Right. That's it, I mean -- that's what I'm doing tonight."
"Oh, are you sure? It's going to be a blast, Harry, I'm asking everyone to come," said Colin with a pleading look on his face.
"Sorry, Colin, but we can't not study for Snape's exams," Harry lied. Ron was hiding his face; he was practically crying with laughter.
Colin looked postively crushed that Harry couldn't attend his party. "Oh, all right then, Harry. Later, Harry!" And he stormed off to another corner of the common room.
"Is he for real?" asked Ron in disbelief. "A party?"
Harry was quite amused by this as well.
"Think anyone will go?"
"Are we?" asked Ron with his eye brows raised. "Be more of a tea party than anything, complete with cookies and milk."
"I could do with some cookies and milk right now; I'm starving," said Harry, and they picked up the pace towards the Great Hall.
They made it down to the Great Hall, and started walking down to the end of Gryffindor table when something odd about half way down caught their attention.
It was Parvati and Lavender teaching what looked like a provocative dance routine to -- WOOD!
They were in the aisle on the other side of the table and there was Lavender going "And one and two and three and four... that's it, Oliver, shake it a little bit more."
Ron stared at them with his jaw dropped.
"No, no, Oliver... turn to the left," yelled out Parvati.
"I'm TRYING, I obviously wasn't blessed with the talent of rhythm," said Wood in frustration.
"Just work the hips," Lavender hissed.
It was odd, Harry thought, that no one else was looking at them. But yet, he and Ron stood on the spot and were openly staring at the three of them.
"Work it, Oliver, come on!"
"I'M TRYING!"
Wood was obviously not doing a good a job as Parvati and Lavender wanted him to.
"Going to stare all day, are you?" came a voice. It was Hermione. "Sit down, will you two?" Harry and Ron went down to the end of the table and sat down.
"What has gotten in to them," Harry asked Hermione, still staring at Parvati, Lavender and Wood.
"Just practicing," she said simply.
"For what?" added Ron.
However, she did not answer. She kept her face to her plate and kept on eating.
During their time at breakfast, Harry and Ron spotted a number of extremely strange things:
The biggest had to be Colin and Justin Finch-Fletchley at the Slytherin table, chatting with none other than Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle. They were talking about something going on at eight o'clock; and they kept laughing and writing on a scrap of paper on the table.
Harry heard Malfoy say, "Yeah, yeah and then we can play..." Harry then looked at Ron, who did nothing but shrug.
Then, Harry heard Colin say, "You're my hero, Malfoy." With that, Ron dropped his glass of pumpkin juice all over him.
"ARRRGGGHHHH!!" He jumped up from his seat.
Trying not to laugh at Ron, again, Harry directed his attention over to the Ravenclaw table. And there was Cho with -- HERMIONE!! Wasn't she just sitting with them?
"AHHHHHH!"
Not only was she with Hermione, but Pansy Parkinson and Angelina Johnson; they also were deep in conversation. Harry's eyes were now almost coming out of his head. Why hadn't Hermione told him she was friendly with Cho?
"This is straaaange," said Ron in disbelief, trying to clean his robes with a napkin. "When did Hogwarts merge and when did you stop being Creevey's hero, Harry?"
Just then they were interrupted by Lavender.
"NO, OLIVER! Shake it to the right, that's right... do it again!"
"I'm getting out of here," said Ron, and Harry followed close behind. Walking towards the door they spotted Fred, George, Lee and -- Neville deep in conversation, as well.
The last thing Harry heard was Cho laugh and then say, "Yes, that'll make the boys eyes bug out all right!" Ron had to practically drag Harry out of the Great Hall after that one.
"Noooo... I wanna stay!" Harry was trying to fight his way back inside.
"No, you don't," and Ron continued to drag him out.
"Something strange is going on," Harry concluded, now giving up so Ron could let go of him.
"Oh, really? Ya think?" said Ron sarcastically.
"Think this has to do with Colin's party?"
"Colin's party? Ha."
Harry and Ron headed down to the dungeons for Potions. True, they were early, but maybe all this strangeness had infected Snape and he wouldn't get on their nerves. They were very wrong. In all honesty, everyone seemed to be getting along with each other, minus Harry and the Ron.
Parvati and Lavender had their heads together with Malfoy; and Neville was conversing with Crabbe and Goyle about something. Just then, Hermione ran in.
"Wow, thought I'd be late." She threw her books down and sat down next to Ron.
"What were you talking about with Cho?" asked Harry. He couldn't hold it in.
"Oh... that -- nothing important," she said as she started to unload books from her bag.
"That's a lie, Hermione, something strange is going on," said Ron, cutting in.
"Is there? I haven't noticed anything," said Hermione.
"Hermione, you were with PANSY, talking with her... her and Cho and Angelina, what's up with that?" continued Harry.
"Nothing."
---
Potions was just as torturous as any day, so the strangeness hadn't softened Snape one bit. History of Magic was a bore. And Harry got a good sleep during Divination. When he and Ron headed down to the Great Hall for lunch, nothing had changed since that morning.
"HERMIONE!" Ron yelled as he spotted her, now helping Lavender and Parvati teach Wood his dance routine.
Hermione did nothing but throw a little wave at him.
Cho was no where to be found though, neither was Pansy or Angelina. Fred, George and Lee were now at the SLYTHERIN table, discussing something with Malfoy and a few random Slytherins.
"FRED! GEORGE!" Ron yelled again, in shock this time. They turned around and gave Ron the same fake wave as Hermione did, and returned to their conversation with Malfoy.
Harry was in disbelief, too. "Ron, something is wrong. Very wrong."
"No shit, Sherlock."
They sat down, downed their lunch and left quickly as possible. As they were walking by Wood, he was yelling out, "Do the hustle!" and doing a poor version of what the three girls had just taught him.
"No rhythm," Parvati whispered to Lavender and Hermione.
Their last class was Transfiguration. Even McGonagall didn't notice they sudden merge of the Slytherins and the Gryffindors, minus Harry and Ron. When Transfiguration ended, they saw Colin in the doorway and he ran up to Malfoy the second the bell had rung. When Harry and Ron passed them, they looked extremely excited.
Harry and Ron decided to skip dinner in order to avoid anymore strange sightings of Wood trying to dance and Colin being friendly with Malfoy -- it was scarying the hell out of them, all for different reasons. It was around six o'clock and they decided to just roam around the castle, as risky as it may have seemed.
"I seriously could not stomach another glimpse of what may be going on," said Ron as they were walking down an abandoned corridor.
"Tell me about it. Any ideas of what might have gotten into them? asked Harry.
"Nope, not a clue, but I hope whatever the heck is messing those people up doesn't mess me up; I might become friends with Malfoy -- I couldn't bear the thought."
Ron continued to blabber on.
"And what about him and Colin? Him and my BROTHERS? They're always looking to blow up Malfoy or something."
That was very true, Harry thought, especially when it came to Quidditch matches against Slytherin. The Weasley twins always hoped to send a Bludger straight into Malfoy's rat face. They had always been unsuccessful.
"Did you see Hermione with Cho?" Harry blurted out, hoping to discuss some of his problems now.
"Yeah, I saw that, very strange. Very strange."
They walked about for what seemed like over an hour and then they decided to head down to the Great Hall to see if every one was gone -- and if there was any food left.
As they were approaching the entrance --
"DAMN IT, OLIVER! Shake what your momma gave ya!" yelled Parvati or Lavender, Harry couldn't tell which.
"I don't think so..." Ron said in exasperation and they headed in the opposite direction, still walking, and hopeful to avoid Filch.
"Good thinking, I don't want to see Wood try to shake it anymore, I think I'd be sick if I did," said Harry, disgusted.
"Parvati and Lavender should have given up long ago -- I would have; actually I would have never even tried."
"Same here."
No sooner had Harry finished his sentence when Parvati, Lavender and Wood came bolting down the corridor Harry and Ron were currently walking down.
"Crap, we're late," yelled Wood as the three of them flew by like black blurs.
Harry and Ron turned to watch Parvati, Lavender and Wood's bodies fall from sight.
"Something's up; it's Colin's party, I'm telling you," said Harry. If it wasn't Colin's party, he had no idea what was going on then.
"Harry, be logical now, are you starting to go loco, too?"
Harry didn't answer, instead, he looked at his watch. "It's twenty past eight, think we should go have a look?"
"Well, it's in our Common Room, isn't it?" said Ron sarcastically, obviously not wanting to be seen anywhere near Colin's "party."
They turned around and went in the direction Parvati, Lavender and Wood had just raced down. They were approaching the hall that led to the Common Room when --
"Do you hear pounding?" asked Ron curiously. They turned the corner.
"What the HELL?!" yelled Harry, spotting a very large, blinking neon sign above the portrait of the Fat Lady that read...
CLUB CREEVEY
They approached the portrait gingerly, afraid to get any closer. There was definitely something going on inside.
"Well, are you two going to join the festivities?" said the Fat Lady, and she opened her portrait without even asking for the password.
Harry and Ron stared.
"I don't think we're in Gryffindor Tower anymore, Dororthy," said Ron, his jaw drooping.
They walked in.
"One Sickle," came a low grunt. It was... CRABBE?
"Get out of our Common Room!" said Ron fiercely.
"Can't," said Goyle, "we got bouncer duty."
"Bouncer duty?" said Harry and Ron in unison.
"One Sickle to enter Club Creevey."
"This is OUR Common room, let us in," yelled Harry.
"Oh, Ron, stop being a prat and give them a Sickle." It was Fred at the top of the spiral staircase.
Harry and Ron each threw a Sickle at Goyle and walked into the room they used to be able to enter for free.
"Ron, I'm scared."
The place resembled a night club more than anyone else, there was music and everyone was dancing. Then, a voice came over a sound system:
"Yo, yo, yo!"
Harry looked up. It was none other than Colin himself, standing on a stage at the opposite end of where they were standing.
"I'd like to welcome everyone to my cozy little get together. First, I'd like to thank my DJ's for the wickedly wicked music we got here... DJ Dray-Ko and DJ Hustlin' Justin."
Harry and Ron looked around and spotted the DJ's on another smaller stage.
"You have got to be kidding me! MALFOY AND JUSTIN!" cried out Ron.
"Thank you, my Homie G," said Malfoy, decked out in baggy jeans and a baggy T-shirt (so was Justin). "Are you ready to blow the roof off this joint or what?"
The crowd responded. "THE ROOF, THE ROOF, THE ROOF IS ON FIRE!"
"Awwwww yeeeeeaaaaah," Justin yelled over the sound system. The crowded repeated what he said.
Harry and Ron had hardly walked an inch when they spotted something that would give them nightmares for years to come.
"AHHH! WOOD!" It all made sense to Harry now, as unpleasant as it was.
In large cages, dangling fifteen feet above the crowd, were Parvati, Lavender and Wood, in what looked like spandex suits, doing the same routine Harry and Ron has seem them doing all day in the Great Hall.
"I think I'm going to be sick," choked Ron, staring up at them. Wood was having a hard time adjusting, his head kept hitting the top of the cage.
"Now," said Colin over the sound system, "I'd like also like to thank my three awesome cage dancers, dancing high above us: Lavender, Parvati and Wood. Shake what your momma give ya, Wood!" The crowd howled with laughter.
"And, of course, my four fab pole dancers."
Pole dancers? Harry thought. Where? He was searching rapidly around the room --
"AAHHH!! HERMIONE!!" croaked Ron.
"AAHHH!! CHO!!" cried Harry.
The pole dancers were in fact Hermione, Cho, Pansy and Angelina. They were doing provocative dance moves around their poles -- looking much like strippers in a strip club. It was Harry's dreams coming true, in a public sort of way.
"Hi Harry! Hi Ron!" yelled Hermione, dangling upside down with her legs wrapped around the pole.
Cho stuck her tongue out at Harry.
---
Harry and Ron, still in their school robes, were definitely not dressed for the occasion. Harry saw Ernie Macmillan dance by in a wifebeater with Hannah Abbott, who had on a tube top and booty shorts. Lee Jordan was wearing a toga and Seamus was strutting around in tight leather pants.
"Ewww," muttered Ron, spotting Seamus.
Right after Seamus danced away, they decided to go upstairs and drop their cloaks off. They ran through the crowd, up the stairs and met Fred, George and Lee at the top of the stairs. They all had smug looks on their faces
"Howdy, kids!" said Fred excitedly. "Good party, eh?"
"Why aren't you three down with the others weirdos?" asked Harry.
"Oh," said George, winking at Fred and Lee, "we're the Love Squad, we have to guard the Love Domain."
"The what?" asked Ron. Then, Harry noticed they were guarding the door to their dormitory. This didn't look right.
"What's going on in there?" asked Harry suspiciously.
Even before they answered, Ron began to try to push his way through Fred, George and Lee to no avail, but did get a peak into their room.
"DEAN!! GET OUT OF MY BED!! UGGGHHH!!"
Dean was in fact in there, but not alone. He and some random Ravenclaw girl were doing the nasty in Ron's bed, with the curtains open. There seemed to be a couple in Neville's bed, as well.
"GET IN YOUR OWN BED, DEAN!" Ron bellowed as he tried to push his way through.
"Now, now, Ron, the Love Domain is only for those who intend to make a lil' love; you can head back downstairs now," said Fred, laughing, pointing to the stairs.
Once again, Harry grabbed Ron around his collar and dragged him down the stairs, for fear he might have whipped out his wand and cast one of the Unforgivable Curses on Fred and George. So much for dropping off their cloaks.
At the bottom of the stairs they saw Neville, working as bartender?
"NEVILLE! You're serving alcohol?" Ron yelled in surprise, he eyes drifting over to Hermione's pole.
"I didn't want to, but Colin couldn't find anyone else for the job," he said glumly. "And it's only butterbeer with rum or something, dunno really, I just put it in."
"EVERYBOOOOODY, it's time for the MONSTER MASH!" yelled out Malfoy and the crowd started cheering as he played the song...
"He did the mash, the Monster Mash..." the song went.
Harry and Ron moved around the crowd, trying to not get too close to the dance floor where they were afraid of getting randomly grinded by some random person. Harry swore he saw Seamus and Ernie doing their thang. Harry moved closer to the wall.
Just then, without notice --
BOOM! WHAM! PLOP!
Wood fell into his cage door and plummeted the twenty feet into the crowd below.
"I give up," he yelled in disgust.
"Oliver, get your ass back in your cage, right now!" screamed Lavender. "Do you want me to use THIS?" She held up a whip. Wood got back in his cage.
They continued to walk around the floor and ended up near Hermione's pole, when she spotted them she took a break.
"Phew," she said as she wiped her forehead, "I'm exhausted! These moves are way more intricate than I thought they would be."
"Why didn't you tell us about this?" asked Harry.
"Well, you turned down Colin's invitation, right? So, why do you care?" she asked with a mischievous smile.
Ron responded by staring at Hermione in her spandex suit.
"Pig." she said simply, and got back to her pole work, purposely hitting Ron in the face with one of her flying legs.
"Attention. Attention," said Justin over the sound system, "it's time for a new song, everyone's favorite party song -- THRILLER! Do the monster moves if you know, peeps!"
Just then the portrait door opened, and it was DUMBLEDORE!
"Oh crap!" mumbled Ron, expecting everyone in the room to get expelled on the spot.
Malfoy cut in through the music. "Hey, Professor, mind doing some moves for us?" The crowd began cheering.
"It would be my great delight to entertain you fine party people with some moves I learned in my youth," he said as he walked towards the middle of the dance floor, the crowd parting as he made his way through. Harry and Ron ran to the stairs to stand on to get a good view.
"What is he going to do?" asked Ron.
Harry shrugged.
Without any introduction, Dumbledore broke out into a break dance, his cap flying off his head and smacking Neville in the face.
"GO ALBUS! GO ALBUS! GO ALBUS! IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY!" the crowd cheered as Dumbledore did his thing on the floor.
Ron stared with an open mouth. "Oh - my - God..."
Dumbledore continued to break dance until his beard go wrapped around his ankle and he had to end the spectacle. "That will be all."
He continued to jump onto the DJ's stage, took out his wand and started to shooting thongs out of it. Seamus went diving for a purple one and crash landed on top of Padma Patil, who looked disgusted with her sister. AFter that little free-for-all, Dumbledore jumped off the stage and headed for the portrait hole...
"Professor..." Harry yelled, running towards him.
"Ah, Harry, no need to worry," he said, "What the Heads of House don't know, won't hurt them." He winked and stocked through the portrait hole and left.
"What was THAT?" Harry asked.
Ron did nothing but gasp like a fish out of water.
As Harry was trying to digest what he just saw, Colin turned up, in a long, white fur coat, a white top hat, and a walking stick. He looked thrilled.
"Harry, oh, Harry! I'm so happy you turned up!" and he hugged Harry. "You too, Ron," and he hugged Ron, too. Then he left without another word.
Dumbledore breakdancing and Colin hugging him, that was enough to permanently scar Harry for life, he thought.
"For Christ's sake, Draco, we need some real music here!" yelled out someone over the sound system. It was Pansy, leaving her pole and making her way to the DJ stage. Malfoy looked scared. "Who wants some REAL music?" The crowd howled.
Pansy whipped out her wand, said some unheard words and the music changed from "Thriller," to "Hot In Herre'" as everyone knows, that classic Nelly hit.
The crowd went wild and started singing along: "It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes. I'm am getting so high, I will take my clothes off."
And with that, people actually started taking their clothes off and throwing them into the air. Along with Dumbledore's hat, Neville got hit the face with a leather bra. He ducked behind his bar and stayed down there to avoid anymore flying undergarments.
"AHHHHHHH!!" yelled out Harry and Ron in unison.
Ron jumped on top of Neville's bar to try to get a glimpse of Hermione, but slipped on some butterbeer and went crashing down to the floor, on top of Neville.
"BLOODY HELL!" Harry heard him yell.
Harry didn't know what to do, except stand where he was, out of the line of fire. Seamus was now fighting with Padma for the thong; Dean came waltzing down the stairs, buttoning his pants; Cho and Pansy were grinding on each other and Colin was in a mini-mosh pit, moving all over the crowd. Fred and George came down the stairs, leaving Lee to guard the Love Domain, and joined the mosh pit.
Then, right when Harry wanted it all to end, it did...
"WHAT IS GOING ON IN HERE?" yelled a shocked voice. It was McGonagall. Oh, no, thought Harry. Then, it got even worse, Snape came right behind her. He looks utterly nauseous.
"Hey, Snape, PONY RIDE!" yelled Fred, and he jumped on Snape's back.
"ARRGGHH, get off, Weasley!"
McGonagall then took out her wand and said some sort of spell, and the stage, the cages, the poles and everything related to the party disappeared; leaving Malfoy and Justin to fall to the ground.
"Please, Professor, the party was only getting started!" pleaded Colin.
"Is this your doing, Creevey?" she asked him, her eyes wide. "DETENTION! FOR THE REMAINDER OF THE SCHOOL YEAR!"
She used her wand to make Colin's ridiculous get-up disappear.
"BED! NOW!"
Slowly by slowly, all the Slytherins, Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws marched out through the portrait hole, looking very disappointed. Soon, only those left were the bummed out Gryffindors.
"Phew, I'm glad that's over," said Ron sounding relieved.
"Me too," said Harry in agreement.
Hermione, Dean, Neville and Seamus joined Harry and Ron and began to walk up the stairs to their dormitories.
"Hermione, what was up with you?" Ron asked. "You were wild!"
"Oh, really?" she said, still with that mischievous look in her eye.
"YES!"
Hermione turned to the remaining boys.
"Do you guys mind chilling out her for a while?"
"Why?" they all asked slowly.
Hermione proceeded to jump on Ron's back and drag him into his dormitory.
"Love Domain time," and she slammed the door in their faces.