Hello and welcome to the Inuyasha little book of crack! I hope everyone likes my other stories so far and if you like this story I also have a Bleach and Naruto version! Enjoy!

Sesshoumaru- The scissors

It was just a normal day in Feudal Japan, Inuyasha was getting 'sat', Kagome was yelling, Miroku was groping, Sango was hitting, and Shippo was playing with scissors.

Uh-oh, wait a moment. Shippo was playing with what? Ok, maybe we should start from the beginning.

Kagome had come home from the well with her huge yellow backpack and run over to Inuyasha, who ignored her, so she sat him and began yelling.

So Sango began trying to break up their fight and Miroku took advantage of that situation to grope Sango. As a result, she hit him and they began fighting.

Meanwhile, Shippo jumped over to Kagome's backpack, opened a random compartment and reached inside. Something sharp and metal was felt so he grabbed it and pulled it out.

The thing turned out to be scissors, but Shippo didn't know that. He was excited to see this strange new object and he ran away from the rest of his group to play with it.

Soon enough he found that the object could cut very easily and should not be run with. Then he heard Kagome screaming his name so he dropped the scissors and ran over to her.

After that the entire Inuyasha group headed off west, in search of more jewel shards.

With Sesshoumaru...

Sesshoumaru and his little group were walking on a thin path to an unknown destination and they needed to get there as soon as possible.

However, Rin was getting tired and she needed to sleep. Reluctantly, Sesshoumaru stopped at a clearing near a well that had no water in it.

While Jaken was getting camp ready Rin ran off to the clearing to pick flowers. There were many flowers, and she was so excited that she wanted to pick them all.

However, there was one strange grey flower lying in the grass. She ran over to it and saw it was not a flower, but a strange sharp object with handles.

Just like Shippo had done before her she played around with it and found that it could cut extremely well.

She then deemed this object worthy enough to carry around with her and ran back to Sesshoumaru with it. Unfortunately Sesshoumaru was not there and she couldn't show him her new discovery.

Maybe if Sesshoumaru had been there then the huge disaster that was going to happen might have been averted.

When Sesshoumaru returned with food, three fat bunnies, he saw that Rin was already asleep.

He refrained from sighing, she had been complaining she was hungry but now she was asleep. Jaken cooked the bunnies and then put them in his bag to save them for tomorrow.

In the middle of that night Rin woke up, hungry. After she nibbled on the bunnies in Jaken's bag and realized she didn't want to sleep.

Then she looked at the scissors, at Sesshoumaru, at the scissors again and then finally back at Sesshoumaru. Then a wicked grin spread itself on her face and she picked up the scissors.

Some weeks ago, Jaken said that a true man had short hair, but then Sesshoumaru stepped on him. Maybe Sesshoumaru would look manlier with shorter hair.

Rin slowly crawled over to Sesshoumaru and picked up a strand of his hair. In her mind she figured that the shorter hair a man had the manlier he was.

So, she snipped off his hair right down to the scalp. By the time she was done Sesshoumaru had very little hair and it looked so horrible I can barely describe it.

That morning was so quiet it was as if God himself was watching and waiting to see Sesshoumaru's reaction when he saw his hair, all over the ground.

It was worth the wait because the second Sesshoumaru woke up and saw his beautiful silver hair lying all around him he jumped up and began to twitch violently.

After a minute he recomposed himself and looked at Rin, who had fallen asleep holding the scissors. He picked them up quietly and examined them.

In messy writing it said 'Kagome' on the scissors. Sesshoumaru immediately recalled the fact that Kagome was the name of the woman that travelled with his idiot half brother.

Since this was her object, this was her fault. He silently vowed to kill her and then ran out of camp to go look for a wig.

What? Did you seriously thing that Sesshoumaru was going to confront his brother nearly bald? Pfft.

The only person he trusted with this dilemma was old man Totsai. He made it to his home within fifteen minutes and he walked in without any regard for the fact that the old man was still sleeping.

Totsai woke up with a start and when he saw Sesshoumaru was nearly bald he rubbed his eyes and said, "Oh no, hell has frozen over, Sesshoumaru is without his hair, WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!"

Sesshoumaru silenced Totsai with a dark glare and he said, "Get me new hair." Totsai got out of bed quickly and then said, "Yes, yes, my lord right away."

Then he ran into his storage room and pulled out a long silver wig and some glue. After that he ran over to Sesshoumaru, gave him both objects, explained how to use them and then jumped back into bed.

Sesshoumaru said nothing but quickly applied to glue and attached the wig. It almost felt like his real hair and it was the exact same shade too.

Sesshoumaru didn't want to know why Totsai had this wig in the first place, but he was glad that he did.

Now, his second step was to pay his little brother a visit and make his human wench pay.

Back at camp Rin just woke up and was surprised to see that someone had taken her scissors. So, she shrugged it off and went to go wake Jaken.

When he woke and saw the hair he freaked out and screamed, "Hell has frozen over, Sesshoumaru is bald, we're all going to die!"

Strange, his reaction was the same as Totsai's, they must have had some sort of bet that when Sesshoumaru went bald the world would end.

They were partially right, Sesshoumaru's wrath could end the world within the second, but he chose to hold it in and use it against Inuyasha and his gang.

With Inuyasha and the gang...

Kagome woke up feeling uneasy that morning. Something didn't feel right and she did not like it one bit.

She got up quickly and woke the others up. Usually when she got this feeling something truly horrible was supposed to happen. Everyone got up and then Inuyasha growled, "Sesshoumaru."

Surely enough, a few seconds later Sesshoumaru walked in from the forest and to their camp. He looked extremely angry and Inuyasha gulped.

He remembered that look, Sesshoumaru was in complete 'kill' mode right now and his anger made him ten times more powerful.

Sesshoumaru wasted no time and he ran straight at Kagome, who just stood there like a deer in headlights. Of course, Inuyasha tried to save her but Sesshoumaru was too fast for him and within the minute he had Kagome by the throat.

Inuyasha screeched her name in the background but Sesshoumaru didn't care and he said, "Wench, you will pay for what you did."

She looked at him with fear and confusion but then gasped when she saw Sesshoumaru take out her scissors. Shocked, she said, "Sesshoumaru, how did you get my scissors?"

He narrowed his eyes at her and said, "You left them as a trap in the clearing by the bone eaters well."

She shook her head and then she said, "No, no I didn't, please believe me, I need them and I didn't know you would be at the bone eaters well!"

Sesshoumaru dropped her on the ground roughly and then he said, "Then explain how the scissors got there." She shook her said and Sesshoumaru knew she had no idea.

So, he looked toward the other members of the group, it had to be one of them. It couldn't be Inuyasha, he wasn't smart enough to carry the plan out, nor could it be the monk or demon slayer, they had better things to do.

That leaves the fox kit. Sesshoumaru glared steadily at the little kit, who whimpered and then in one deep breath he screamed, "I was playing with the scissors in the field and then I forgot them I'm sorry, please don't kill me!"

Sesshoumaru nearly sighed at the stupidity of his situation and he then quickly turned around and left like none of this had happened.

However, for some reason there was an extremely strong gust of 'magic' wind that blew right at Sesshoumaru and his wig flew off, leaving him standing in front of Inuyasha half bald with glue all over his head. "Shit."