Disclaimer: I don't own Lord of the Rings, and, sadly, that includes Merry, Pippin, and all of the places in the Shire mentioned herein. I will make no profit on this labour of love, which is even sadder. I promised myself I wouldn't cry…
Author's Note: This fic is, indeed, a slash, and my first attempt at such a work. It isn't, however, dirty in any way, which explains the "T" rating. Please, though, keep in mind that if slash (which is gay pairings) offends you, then look elsewhere for romantic fluff fics.
Progression of a Feeling
By Bressa W.
Chapter One
Confessions
There's a good chance that what I'm about to do will be the dumbest, most painful thing I've ever done. There's also a chance, though not nearly as good, that this will be the smartest thing I ever do and will bring me unending happiness. Seeing as how I could use a little unending happiness in my life, I'll do it. I just hope it doesn't bite me in the ass.
I'm Peregrin Too, son of Paladin, more commonly known as Pippin. My best friend is Merry Brandybuck, but you already know that. What you don't know (at least, I hope you didn't) was that I'm hopelessly in love with him. And what I'm about to do, for those of you wondering, is tell him so.
See where the worst choice/best choice thing comes in? It all depends on his reaction. Please, let this turn out the way I want it to.
I'm waiting ever-so-patiently in Tuckborough for Merry to arrive. He's fifteen minutes late, but that's okay. He's always late.
A knock. Did the door just knock? Er…did someone just knock on the door? Oh, God. What do I do? What do I say?
Oh, yeah. "Come in."
Merry (Merry!) came in. He grinned. "Hey, Pip. What's up?"
I gulped. "N-n-n-not much, Merry," I replied with difficulty. I groaned inwardly. He was in the door thirty seconds and I was already making a fool of myself.
He looked at me skeptically. "Are you sure you're all right?"
"Not really." I sat down carelessly and patted the chair across from me. "Have a seat."
He did so, a little cautiously, and still scrutinizing me. "You seem nervous."
Oh, God. Panic. "Umm…No…" The moment of truth. Here it comes. I took a deep breath. "I just wanted to tell you…"
"I love you," he blurted.
I blinked. My brain took a few seconds to register and process what he'd said. And then, doubt crept in. I must've heard him wrong. How do I follow up on that? Which word do I use?
Here's one. "What?"
"I love you," he repeated, this time with more uncertainty.
Once again, my brain seemed to process the words at a slower-than-average rate. Except this time, I felt elation instead of doubt. I felt a wide smile spread across my face and my heart leapt in my throat. "Really?" I asked.
He nodded tentatively. "Is that okay?"
I blinked again. He was really trying to give me a heart attack. How do I respond to that? Can words express it?
No, I decided. Words can't express it. So, I stood up, and in a way I can't describe, because I don't remember doing it, I reached for him. And kissed him.
Fireworks? Fireworks! Rockets! Nuclear bombs! All went off in my mind and chest and stomach. I swear, I can feel sparks flying out of my fingers and toes. But does he feel it, too? Is he even kissing me back?
Now he is. God, I hope I didn't scare him off. I hope he still loves me. I don't ever want to be just friends again.
He broke the kiss. I panicked. Did I mess up? Was I doing it wrong? He smiled. "I had to breathe."
I chuckled and reached for his hand. It feels so right to just be here, with him. He leaned against me. Feeling all of his body against me is having a side effect.
No, I'm not "aroused." I'm thinking about the future. Where do we go from here? No one will accept our love. I don't want to have to hide from everyone.
I guess he was thinking about the same thing, because he sighed. "What do we do now, Pippin?"
I searched my brain frantically for a response. Finally, I relaxed when the answer came to me. "We love each other," I said simply.
I guess he was thinking it over, because it took a while for him to respond. He nodded. "I think that's all we can do."