Quick note, not that sure how what rating this will turn out to be, not sure if I can change the rating. I'll put a warning at the start of any chapter that may contain some of that good stuff ;D
Gonna be in Spain for the next two weeks so probably will not update till after that, sorry!
I don't own South Park (do I really need to say this haha)
It was midsummer, a humid heat wave had hit South park which was unusual for the mountain town which, even in summer was normally covered in a thin layer of snow. A girl with blond hair which was braided at the ends ran across the street. She was wearing a purple sundress and golden brown sandals. She ran towards South Park gym but rather than using the entrance like a normal human, she ran up to a fence next to the gym and quickly jumped up and latched on to the wire fence then gracefully climbed over and landed with a 'thud' on her feet. Holding her hair in place, she continued running down the alleyway by the side of the gym that was overgrown with ivy, lobelia and un-kept buzz velvet buddleia which took up the majority of the narrow side passage. The flowers were flocking with butterflies.
As the girl ran along the alley she panted heavily due to the humidity, small orange dust clouds were floating above the ground where she'd been running.
Her pace slowed to a walk as she reached the back of the gym, it was a very secluded area in the shade of four tall Spanish pine trees. There was no view of the street here and she quietly clambered onto the electricity box which was humming to itself quietly.
Above the box was a small window. She pulled her self up and peeked into the window.
"Bingo." She whispered to herself.
'Girls changing room' she thought to herself, a cocky grin plastered on her face.
All the running had messed up her hair slightly and from the front you could see strands of darker blond hair crossing her face... well it seemed like a her, her face, although very bright and full of life, may have seemed perfectly normal upon first glance. But for anyone who cared to look more carefully they would start to notice some rather odd features.
Firstly she had a rather strong jaw bone. Her eyes were set a bit to far back to be considered feminine and she had rather broad shoulders.
Apart from this, Kenny made up for a pretty cute girl.
Provided he didn't forget to shave once in a while, that is...
Completely absorbed in ogling the girls, Kenny was in Heaven.
He often came to spy on Bebe, Wendy and any other girl who was unfortunate enough to be going to the gym. Naturally Kenny could have any of the girls he wanted with his boyish charm and enough vodka but something about the secrecy and the risk involved in spying on the girls this way was a massive turn on.
Once he had been caught by the manager of the gym and had his picture pinned up at the back of the entrance desk. He had a shit-eating grin in the picture and his head was slightly tilted to the side. In fact he was quite proud to have his photo up there.
But Because of this he needed a disguise, so he came in drag.
Of course there were easier ways to disguise himself but he enjoyed the looks he got from guys on the street and the numbers he was occasionally passed, they were useful for prank calls later on when he got bored of listening to his parents screeching at each other.
Kenny's eyes widened when Red walked in with her shirt off and her bra exposed, he loved red-heads, beautiful.
Suddenly he herd a thunderous laugh which sent him falling back off the box with surprise. He hit his head on a rock and his wig fell to the ground.
"Arggggg!" Kenny moaned as he clutched his head, he curled up into a ball and lay their clutching his head for a bit as some blood dripped down his face.
He sat up cross legged with a pout and looked around, he'd recognised the laugh, it was Cartman. But as he look around he saw no sign of the fatass.
Then Kenny heard a click and turned to look at his right were he saw that someone was trying to get out the back door of the male part of the gym next door, clearly someone with out the keys as it was taking them a while to get the door open. "Ay! Where's my level nine thief! Craig get your emo ass self to this door right now!"
"Cartman we're not playing that stupid game any more." Craig stated in his nasally voice.
"What are you guys talking about" an unfamiliar voice said.
"Nothing, Cartman just wanted to see what's behind this door" Kenny heard Stan's voice say.
"It's just an alley, nothing too special, we lost the key for it months ago" the unfamiliar voice answered, Kenny assumed that it must be someone who worked at the gym.
Kenny let a sigh of relief as he picked himself up of the ground, grabbing his wig and shoddily placing it back on his head. He casually walked over to the door, sat down beside it and began eavesdropping.
"So, Wendy's dragging me off to some midsummer couples thing this Saturday" Stan said making idle conversation, "Ha! Gayyyy!" Cartman retorted.
"Your just jealous because no one in town would go with you if you paid them!" Stan shot back. Kenny smiled to himself, he loved hearing the banter anyone had with Cartman. "You know better than anyone else that isn't true, me and Red are super kool together Stan." Now this gave Kenny a shock, what would a beauty like Red be doing with a fatass like Cartman, God darn it, Kenny had been looking forward to getting some outta that, stupid fatass screwing things up like usual.
"Hey there guys!" Kenny heard Bebe's voice, the girls must be finished changing, well there's always tomorrow. But now that there were girls here it made Kenny's time worth while, he perched himself on the window ledge and peeked in through the blinds. "Ay! No girls in the guy's changing room, especially not blonds who should be working at Raisins!" Cartman shouted.
"What about little Red here, hey Cartman?" Bebe teased and Cartman shut up as Red entered the room.
"I was just telling them about the midsummer couple's thing" Stan said to Wendy.
"Ohhh! Wouldn't it be superb if loads of us go as couples! We're all are in relationships already and it would be like one big meet up! It'd be toats fab! Don't you agree Wends?" Bebe blurted out to the whole changing room after listening in on Stan and Wendy. "Cartman, you have Red, Kyle and Rebecca are finally a thing, you and Stan, Annie and Butters, Token and Milly, I'll see if Tweak or someone wants to go and even Kenny has that one girl right! It'd be awesome!" Bebe listed off.
"Bebe I don't think Kenny's had a proper relationship since that one crazy Jonas Brothers girl in 4th grade..." Stan started but was cut off by going off again by Bebe.
"Hey Craig, you got a bed buddy?"
Craig glared at Bebe and opened his mouth to speak when Cartman interjected "Well you see Bebe, the thing is that our much loved, arsehole friend here Craig has been diagnosed with a fatal and sadly incurable disease!"
"Oh my God! Craig are you okay" Bebe started to sob.
"It's a terrible thing." Cartman continued, Craig glaring at him "It's called being a fag, doomed to be forever shunned by society!" Bebe slapped him.
Craig flipped him off.
Red said more softly "Are you really Craig?" With an intrigued look on her face.
"No." Craig said shortly. "No I'm not, guys stop looking at me like that." He continued after seeing the disbelieving looks on his peer's faces.
"Then why," Cartman spoke out "have you not had a single girlfriend since like forever, hey Craig."
"I dunno" Craig answerer clearly getting bored by the subject quickly. "Why have you been a fatass since like forever."
"It isn't my fault your so far up Clyde's butt that you can't see your own gayness."
Clyde, who had been sitting in a corner to engrossed in an 'educational' magazine that Kenny had lent him, suddenly perked up at the mention of his name. "Hey Cartman, stop being a dick, I'm not gay!"
"Oh really Clyde? Then why have you not had a girlfriend since forth grade! Clearly the only explanation here is that you and Craig are having a secret butt buddy relationship!"
Craig flipped him off.
Kenny couldn't hold back a snigger. With a massive grin plastered on his face he continued watching the amusing scene wondering where this was going.
Cartman started "Well Craig, if you feel oh so strongly about it..."
"I don't." Craig stated.
Ignoring Craig, Cartman continued "You should easily be able to find a date by next Saturday."
"I'm really not bothered for this..." Craig muttered.
"Well, I guess that settles it! Craig, come to the midsummer festival on Saturday with a girlfriend, yes a girlfriend Craig, no taking your mum, and you must kiss her in front of us! No random, a girlfriend Craig!" Cratman bellowed out.
Craig flipped him off again.
"You too Clyde! Can't have you dressing up as Craig's girlfriend to hide your gayness" Cartman continued.
"What's wrong with being gay anyway" Craig said nonchalantly.
"Don't be an asshole Craig" Cartman brushed him off as they all headed to exit the gym. "Just be there Craig, or can't you get a girl?"
"Of course he can!" Clyde shouted looking more flushed then he should have, apparently much more affected by this then Craig.
"Well this is the perfect opportunity for him to prove himself then." Cartman shouted back as he exited the gym.
Craig grabbed his bag and headed to leave but Clyde reached out to stop him.
"You'll have a girl right?"
"I'm not going"
"What'd you mean your not going? DUDE!"
"Why does it matter?"
"Because if you don't go with a girl Cartman and his prissy gang will spread rumours about me!"
"And you care about them because?" Craig said glaring at Clyde, clearly becoming more and more pissed.
"Because they are the friking rumour mill of the town! If we don't show, before the night is over the whole town will think we're fucking!"
"So." Craig muttered.
"So? For fuck sake, do you even think about other people!"
"Clearly not to the extent you seem to, it's pathetic." With that Clyde stormed off with Craig glaring at him as he walked away.
"Arsehole" Craig muttered under his breath then grabbed his back pack and slung it over his shoulder.
He stood there alone for a while.
Shafts of light flickered through the blinds Kenny was peeking through.
Kenny kept looking even though there was nothing happening.
Craig's face which was normally stoic and cold had an unreadable expression, well if you can call it that.
He didn't show an emotion but there was something more on his face. It was emotionless yet there was something. Something was on his face. Almost undetectable and certainly unreadable.
Then he turned and Kenny's heart fluttered, he'd been caught. No, Craig wasn't looking at him, he was looking next to the locked door next to him. Craig walked over and put his hand out.
Kenny could no longer see Craig but he didn't need to to know what he was doing. Kenny heard the fumbling with the lock and dashed back into the ivy and bushes to hide himself. They may no longer be playing the 'stupid game' but Craig didn't seem to have forgotten the skills he learnt in it.
It wasn't long until Craig had the door open and it opened with a quite squeak due to it being locked for so long. Craig stepped out into the shady sunlight of the alley. Kenny gulped.
Craig ran a hand threw to his hair which was sweaty due to the heat and the gym workout, he swung his bottle of water back and took a huge gulp and the poured some over his face and hair.
He shook his hair and took out a cigarette and lighted it, inhaling deeply.
He breathed out a large cloud of grey smoke and slumped down against the gym wall. Looking at the ground and playing with his wet hair with a very slight frown on his face.
The frown deepened and he ran his hand through his hair and sighed, breathing out a small grey cloud of smoke.
On the wall behind him there was graffiti, random streets names and hash tags, one more interesting one of Mysterion holding the commanding the army troops after the Coon. Naturally, this one was one of Kenny's personal favourites.
Kenny looked back over at Craig who still had his head in his hands, he'd never seen Craig show more than a touch of emotion and now this? Well, guess it's impossible to hold it in all the time... it was just weird, Craig showing any expression other than cocky and sass.
Craig looked up and blew out another long cloud of light grey smoke into the sky and watched it drift off.
Closed his eyes, still facing up.
Kenny gazed at him, his mind millions of miles, not particularly looking at Craig, just whatever.
In a daze, Kenny lost his grip on the ivy plant stumbling forward and his mind shot back down to earth, catching himself on the ivy plant again stopping himself face planting into the concrete. However this shock the ivy plant enough to pull Craig out of his trance too.
His eye's shot up, all emotion whipped from his face. He stood up and slowly walked towards where Kenny was hiding. "Shit" Kenny thought to himself, "better start thinking up an excuse..."
Craig chucked his cigarette to the ground and stepped on it as he walked towards Kenny's hiding spot. From Kenny's position, Craig had a glare that could kill, he was looking down with squinting eyes, the bright sun behind him blocked out by his head.
Kenny's pulse quickened.
Craig was right next to him, a couple more steps and Kenny would be in plain view.
Craig turned.
Kenny scrunched his eye's tight together.
He was face to face with Craig Tucker.
Shit.