Things are okay now. Just like Mary said it was gonna be. And Mary knows everything. Even Alexie was kinda scared of her. But not McKayla.
Mommy looks scared. She is breathing funny. I don't want her to get sick and die. But Mary said that might happen. Because of me, she said. And because of my sisters. She said it mean. We all cried when she said it, 'specially Erin and Elisa. But not Emily. That was 'cause Emily had already gone away. Emily was always kinda quiet. I didn't miss her.
Mary was always yelling. At everyone. She was old. Old as the Smelly Man. The Smelly Man had bad breath and looked at us funny. He was like a dragon, 'cause fire came out of his mouth. I like dragons. Alexie told me not to like the Smelly Man, though. He said he was mean.
Meaner than Mary? I asked
Much meaner, he said.
I miss Alexie. He left too, like Emily. McKayla cried. I never saw her cry before. She is almost crying now. Magdalene has just left. In fire. The dream.
I look at McKayla. She is wearing the necklace. McKayla told me and my sisters that when we saw the necklace, we are safe. Always look for this necklace, she had said.
I touch it. It is so pretty. Very shiny. Mommy has a necklace like this. So I knew it was safe with her. But she came back home not wearing it.
Mommy stops the car. She looks at us in the back and says, I think you have a lot of explaining to do, McKayla. This makes her very sad. She nods and gets out of the car. So does Mommy. Mommy comes and carries me out and puts me down on the ground.
What were you doing spying on us? Mommy asks. She looks mad. And very scared. I don't know why. Mommy is older than McKayla.
McKayla looks down at me. She picks me up. She puts me down on the top of the car. I am taller than both of them now. I smile. I like it better up here. I feel strong. McKayla smiles at me, but Mommy frowns at her.
We weren't spying on you, McKayla says. We were checking on Lizzy. We called her Elizabeth. At least I did. They called her E 65.
Whose they? Mommy asks.
The Smelly Man, I say. I remember him calling me E 56. He got mad 'cause I didn't know he was talking to me.
The Smelly Man? Mommy asks. She turns to look up at me. I feel like her Mommy now.
He breathed smoke, I tell her. Like a dragon.
Mommy's eyes get big. She looks at McKayla. Are you working for them? she asks.
McKayla looks down again. I look down too. There is nothing down. 'Cept a little ant. It goes into a the ground.
McKayla is my sister, I tell Mommy. I think that means that McKayla's mommy is my Mommy. I do not say this. I do not want to be wrong.
Mommy looks very closely at McKayla. McKayla smiles. But she looks sad. Mommy puts her hands on McKayla's face. You look so much like Mulder, she says very quietly.
A big, whirly dragonfly comes over us. It is called a chopper, I think. That word was not in the last upgrade. Anesthetized, incinerate, consternation and poignant were. But not the word for the big, black machine. But I heard Alexie said it once. So I think it is right. Mommy and McKayla look up. They look scared. Anxious, like the upgrade told me.
We should go somewhere else, Mommy says. McKayla nods. Mommy reaches for me. She stops. Her hand twitches.
Come on! McKayla screams. She is almost in the car. But Mommy does not move.
Mommy?
The chopper stops. McKayla looks up. It is just hanging there, up in the sky.
Mommy does not move.
She does not blink.
Mommy?
Mommy?
Mommy!
Mommy?
Her hand grabs my arm. She hold me tight. It hurts. She pulls me down. She pulls me close to her. The chopper does not move. It looks like it smiles.
Something is put on my head. Just a little above my ear. My left one. Not the hand I am supposed to write with, I remember. The thing is cold. It hurts. Mommy pushes hard. It is shaking.
McKayla looks very scared. Terrified, like the upgrade taught me.
Mommy turns to look up at the chopper. I can not see McKayla anymore. I wonder what the thing is. And I wonder what Mommy is doing.
God, what do you want! Mommy screams very loud at the chopper. Something wet hits the top of me head. I don't think it is raining. Leave me alone! Mommy screams. Don't make me do this!
I hear a click. Next to my left ear. The thing pushed into my head is really shaking. So is Mommy. I look up at the chopper. I think I see the Smelly Man. But I don't know. I want to ask McKayla what is going on. I want to know why she is scared.
A loud noise goes off. Mommy screams. McKayla screams. I am quiet.
The chopper moves back. Something hit it, but I did not see anything. The thing against my head goes away. So does Mommy's grip on my arm. I turn around. I want to know what is wrong.
Mommy is standing in front of me. She is holding something against her head, where the thing was for me. Smith & Wesson, like the upgrade showed me. She is crying. Her arms is still shaking.
Make them stop! she yells loud. I do not know what to do. Her other hand tries to force her hand with Smith & Wesson down. But she can't. God, she says, help me.
McKayla comes and pushes her down. A loud noise goes off. I scream. The noise hurts my ears. McKayla is holding Mommy down on the ground. Mommy is crying. McKayla gets up. Mommy stays down. She looks like she wants to follow the ant under.
I go to Mommy. I do not know what to do. Mommy sits up so her legs are not showing. She hugs me. She is shaking and very wet. Smith & Wesson is on the ground. It is far away.
McKayla looks upset. The chopper is coming back. They just want me! she yells. It is hard to hear. The chopper is loud. Mommy does not hear her. I do.
McKayla moves away from us. A man comes down from the chopper. He picks her up. She does not look scared. She looks sad.
Mommy looks up. She sees McKayla. She gets up. McKayla! she cries.
The man and McKayla go up to the chopper. I start to yell McKayla! with Mommy. I do not want her to leave. I do not want her to leave like Emily and Alexie and Magdalene. But she goes up into the chopper. And the chopper leaves.
Mommy does not say a word. We are both quiet. We are scared. I know McKayla will be okay. She is hard. Resistant, like the implant trained me. But so was Emily. And Alexie.
Mommy stands up. Her face is wet. But she is not shaking. She picks me up. She walks back to the car. We stop at Smith & Wesson.
She looks at it.
She looks at me.
She kicks it away.
We go home.
Mommy looks scared. She is breathing funny. I don't want her to get sick and die. But Mary said that might happen. Because of me, she said. And because of my sisters. She said it mean. We all cried when she said it, 'specially Erin and Elisa. But not Emily. That was 'cause Emily had already gone away. Emily was always kinda quiet. I didn't miss her.
Mary was always yelling. At everyone. She was old. Old as the Smelly Man. The Smelly Man had bad breath and looked at us funny. He was like a dragon, 'cause fire came out of his mouth. I like dragons. Alexie told me not to like the Smelly Man, though. He said he was mean.
Meaner than Mary? I asked
Much meaner, he said.
I miss Alexie. He left too, like Emily. McKayla cried. I never saw her cry before. She is almost crying now. Magdalene has just left. In fire. The dream.
I look at McKayla. She is wearing the necklace. McKayla told me and my sisters that when we saw the necklace, we are safe. Always look for this necklace, she had said.
I touch it. It is so pretty. Very shiny. Mommy has a necklace like this. So I knew it was safe with her. But she came back home not wearing it.
Mommy stops the car. She looks at us in the back and says, I think you have a lot of explaining to do, McKayla. This makes her very sad. She nods and gets out of the car. So does Mommy. Mommy comes and carries me out and puts me down on the ground.
What were you doing spying on us? Mommy asks. She looks mad. And very scared. I don't know why. Mommy is older than McKayla.
McKayla looks down at me. She picks me up. She puts me down on the top of the car. I am taller than both of them now. I smile. I like it better up here. I feel strong. McKayla smiles at me, but Mommy frowns at her.
We weren't spying on you, McKayla says. We were checking on Lizzy. We called her Elizabeth. At least I did. They called her E 65.
Whose they? Mommy asks.
The Smelly Man, I say. I remember him calling me E 56. He got mad 'cause I didn't know he was talking to me.
The Smelly Man? Mommy asks. She turns to look up at me. I feel like her Mommy now.
He breathed smoke, I tell her. Like a dragon.
Mommy's eyes get big. She looks at McKayla. Are you working for them? she asks.
McKayla looks down again. I look down too. There is nothing down. 'Cept a little ant. It goes into a the ground.
McKayla is my sister, I tell Mommy. I think that means that McKayla's mommy is my Mommy. I do not say this. I do not want to be wrong.
Mommy looks very closely at McKayla. McKayla smiles. But she looks sad. Mommy puts her hands on McKayla's face. You look so much like Mulder, she says very quietly.
A big, whirly dragonfly comes over us. It is called a chopper, I think. That word was not in the last upgrade. Anesthetized, incinerate, consternation and poignant were. But not the word for the big, black machine. But I heard Alexie said it once. So I think it is right. Mommy and McKayla look up. They look scared. Anxious, like the upgrade told me.
We should go somewhere else, Mommy says. McKayla nods. Mommy reaches for me. She stops. Her hand twitches.
Come on! McKayla screams. She is almost in the car. But Mommy does not move.
Mommy?
The chopper stops. McKayla looks up. It is just hanging there, up in the sky.
Mommy does not move.
She does not blink.
Mommy?
Mommy?
Mommy!
Mommy?
Her hand grabs my arm. She hold me tight. It hurts. She pulls me down. She pulls me close to her. The chopper does not move. It looks like it smiles.
Something is put on my head. Just a little above my ear. My left one. Not the hand I am supposed to write with, I remember. The thing is cold. It hurts. Mommy pushes hard. It is shaking.
McKayla looks very scared. Terrified, like the upgrade taught me.
Mommy turns to look up at the chopper. I can not see McKayla anymore. I wonder what the thing is. And I wonder what Mommy is doing.
God, what do you want! Mommy screams very loud at the chopper. Something wet hits the top of me head. I don't think it is raining. Leave me alone! Mommy screams. Don't make me do this!
I hear a click. Next to my left ear. The thing pushed into my head is really shaking. So is Mommy. I look up at the chopper. I think I see the Smelly Man. But I don't know. I want to ask McKayla what is going on. I want to know why she is scared.
A loud noise goes off. Mommy screams. McKayla screams. I am quiet.
The chopper moves back. Something hit it, but I did not see anything. The thing against my head goes away. So does Mommy's grip on my arm. I turn around. I want to know what is wrong.
Mommy is standing in front of me. She is holding something against her head, where the thing was for me. Smith & Wesson, like the upgrade showed me. She is crying. Her arms is still shaking.
Make them stop! she yells loud. I do not know what to do. Her other hand tries to force her hand with Smith & Wesson down. But she can't. God, she says, help me.
McKayla comes and pushes her down. A loud noise goes off. I scream. The noise hurts my ears. McKayla is holding Mommy down on the ground. Mommy is crying. McKayla gets up. Mommy stays down. She looks like she wants to follow the ant under.
I go to Mommy. I do not know what to do. Mommy sits up so her legs are not showing. She hugs me. She is shaking and very wet. Smith & Wesson is on the ground. It is far away.
McKayla looks upset. The chopper is coming back. They just want me! she yells. It is hard to hear. The chopper is loud. Mommy does not hear her. I do.
McKayla moves away from us. A man comes down from the chopper. He picks her up. She does not look scared. She looks sad.
Mommy looks up. She sees McKayla. She gets up. McKayla! she cries.
The man and McKayla go up to the chopper. I start to yell McKayla! with Mommy. I do not want her to leave. I do not want her to leave like Emily and Alexie and Magdalene. But she goes up into the chopper. And the chopper leaves.
Mommy does not say a word. We are both quiet. We are scared. I know McKayla will be okay. She is hard. Resistant, like the implant trained me. But so was Emily. And Alexie.
Mommy stands up. Her face is wet. But she is not shaking. She picks me up. She walks back to the car. We stop at Smith & Wesson.
She looks at it.
She looks at me.
She kicks it away.
We go home.