AN: Hello my dears, I wrote this story because I was bored after I finished my standardized testing, so I let my mind wander. And I came up with this... I used my OC Aishi, because I couldn't think of anyone else...
Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note or Charley the Unicorn. I wish I did, but then I would be famous and not writing crappy fanfics.
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"Heeey Mello. Hey Mello, wake up."
"Yeah Mello, you silly sleepyhead, wake up."
Mello opened his eyes, groaning. As the grogginess cleared, he saw Matt and Aishi leaning above him, both with creepy smiles plastered to their faces. It was dark…Mello turned his head to look at the clock on his nightstand. It was three in the morning…
"Uhh…guys? What the heck is so dang important that you have to wake me up at three in the morning?! Is the house on fire?!" he growled, sitting up and putting his head in his hands.
"No Mello, we found a map to Candy Mountain. Candy Mountain, Mello!" Aishi said in an abnormally airy voice.
"Yeah Mello, we're going to Candy Mountain. Come with us Mello!" Matt mimicked Aishi's tone, but half an octave lower.
"Yeah Mello! It'll be an adventure. We're going on an adventure, Mello!" Aishi finished.
Mello stared at his two best friends in a rare moment of confusion. But the moment passed, and he returned to his normal self.
"What are you two smoking?!" Mello put his head back on the pillow "I'm going back to sleep, good night!"
"No!" Aishi jumped on Mello's bed, her light weight still being enough to shake the bed "Mello, you have to come with us to Candy Mountain!" she started bouncing up and down on her knees.
"Yeah Mello, Candy Mountain! It's a land of sweets and joy, and joyness…" Matt gushed.
"Aishi, stop the freakin' bouncing…" Mello growled.
"Candy Mountain, Mello!" Aishi shouted, still bouncing.
"Yeah, Candy Mountain!" Matt perched on the end of the bed, forcing his weight down, which shook the bed more.
"Alright fine, I go with you to Candy freakin' Mountain!!!" Mello shot up, pushing Aishi to the floor.
Instead of threatening him, Aishi simply grinned up at him from the floor before standing up. Mello grimaced…this was getting weirder by the moment. He got out of bed, and followed them lazily out of his room. Suddenly, Matt and Aishi started skipping down the hallway…singing. Mello gawked.
"What the heck is wrong with the two of you?!" he shouted.
"Our first stop is over there Mello!" Aishi said, completely ignoring him.
Mello looked to where she was pointing. Once again, Gwin had fallen asleep on the couch.
"What the heck, guys?" Mello whispered.
"That's a Leoplurodon, Mello!" Aishi grinned.
"A magical Leoplurodon!" Matt agreed.
"It's going to guide our way to Candy Mountain!"
"Alright guys, you do know that there's no actual Candy Mountain right? And that's Gwin, not a Leo…plura…whatever." Mello clenched his teeth.
"Shun the non-believer." Aishi said in an even weirder voice.
"Shuuuuun!" Matt chimed.
"Sssssshuuuuuunnnnn!"
"…are you guys sure you're not high, or something?"
Ignoring him, Matt and Aishi started toward Gwin. Mello stared in disbelief as they approached him; nobody messed with Gwin. For one thing, he was huge. At six feet four inches and two hundred something pounds, Gwin could kill you just by sitting on your head. Another thing was that he had a horrible temper. Imagine Mello's mood if someone told him that Near had singlehandedly defeated Kira, then took away his chocolate and locked him in a cold, dark room filled with fangirls for ten years. That would give you an idea as to how Gwin acted when he was in a good mood. Matt poked Gwin's ear and Gwin shot up, growling groggily. Seeing no one, he lay back down, and started snoring loudly.
"…it has spoken!" Aishi cheered.
"He has told us the way!" Matt grinned and they both started off toward the window.
Mello was in shock.
"C'mon Mello!" Matt beamed.
Shaking his head, Mello followed them both as they climbed out the window and down a tree.
"It's just at the bottom of this tree, Mello!" Aishi sang.
"This magical bridge…of hope and wonder!" Matt added.
"Has anyone else noticed we're two stories above the ground…? Seriously guys, we shouldn't be up here…" Mello winced as the branch below him cracked.
"Mello…Meeeeeeeeeeello…Meeeeelllllllllo…Mel-" to his left, Aishi started chanting.
"I'm right here, what the heck do you want?!" he shouted back.
Her creepy smile only got creepier "We're in a tree, Mello!"
As Mello resisted the urge to push Aishi out of the tree, Matt dropped to the ground and started yelling.
"C'mon guuuuuuuuuuyys!!" he crowed.
Mello sighed and slid to the ground, which Aishi did soon after. Running behind a bush, Mello almost lost sight of Matt and Aishi, until they stopped, standing in front of a large black tent with the words "Candy Mountain" written on it in sloppy red paint.
"So…Candy Mountain…?" Mello sighed.
"Candy Mountain! Candy Mountain! You fill me with sweet sugary goodness!" Aishi sang, spinning.
Matt turned to him "Go inside the Candy Mountain Cave Mello!"
"Are you out of your freakin' mind?! There's no way I'm going in there!" Mello snarled.
"But you have to enter Candy Mountain Candy Cave, Mello!" Matt grinned.
Suddenly, a group of five toy robots marched out from behind a bush and started…singing.
Oh, when you're down and looking for some cheering up,
Then just head right on up to the candy mountain cave.
When you get inside you'll find yourself a cheery land,
such a happy and joyful and perky merry land.
They've got lollypops and gummy drop and happy things,
oh so many things that will brighten up your day.
It's impossible to wear a frown in Candy Town;
it's the Mecca of love the candy cave.
They've got jelly beans, and coconuts with little hats,
Candy wraps, chocolate bats, it's a wonderland of sweets.
Ride the candy train to town and hear the candy band,
Candy bells, it's a treat as they march across the land.
Cheery ribbons stream across the sky into the ground,
Turn around, it astounds, it's the dancing candy tree.
In the candy cave imagination runs so free,
so now Mello please will you go into the cave.
Just as suddenly as the robots appeared, they blew up. Mello blinked. Near ran out from behind the bush, on the verge of tears.
"You guys said my robots wouldn't be hurt! Why?!" he cried.
"We lied." Matt said, using his normal voice for the first time in about twenty minutes.
"But…but…" Near stuttered, tears now running down his cheeks.
"Sorry…we're both pyromaniacs…" Aishi said sheepishly, also using her normal voice.
Near nodded and headed back into the house.
"Wait, so are you guys done acting like freaks?" Mello asked.
"What do you mean, Mello?" Aishi's voice was unnaturally airy again.
"Yeah Mello, what do you mean?" Matt's voice was airy too.
"…crap…"
"Just go in the freakin' cave!" they said in unison, further creeping Mello out.
"Fine! Jeez…" Mello stormed into the cave, fuming.
It was dark. And cold. And dark. Mello turned to leave.
"Good bye, Mello!" Aishi waved.
"Yeah, good bye Mello!" Matt mimicked Aishi's wave.
"WHAT?!"
The door to the tent closed, and Mello was hit in the face…
…
Mello woke up. It was bright outside. Glancing over at his clock, Mello saw it was ten in the morning. Suddenly, as usual, Matt and Aishi barged into Mello's room without knocking.
"Hey, Mello, wake up!" Matt crowed.
Mello screamed and hid under the covers. Aishi and Matt exchanged a confused glance.
"What's with him?" Aishi asked.
Matt shrugged.
"I don't know. Mello can be really weird sometimes…"
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AN: So...yeah. That's it. Leave a review and then... be gone!!!