The truth was something fickle in this life you never knew what truth to believe. Everyone had their own version of it some even believe their own to a fault. Some had good intentions in the begging, but when the gray area came so often you stopped seeing the colors. They let the end justify the means. Once you go down that path there is no going back.

Tara work her way up and i played off. She didn't want to be like the other women in this life just an object. She was going to work to be something like her mother. Tara's mother was smart and refused to let them depend on the club she had a family to take care of and when you have twins they tend to be expensive. She started an Adult video film company it started small and blossomed into an empire. Luanne had a true vison for business and Tara flowed her mothers foot steps. Luanne made sure everything was legal no drugs no shady deals and in no way could be tied to the club. Tara admired everything her mother had done. Bobby knew he didn't deserve Luanne but he loved her fearlessly. Luanne loved her family and her life she had.

Tara was never ashamed of her family or what her mother did she embraced it. Tara did what she had to do to support her daughters. Tara got pregnant at 19 right before jaxs left

2 years ago….

Tara thought he would change his mind she loved him so much it hurt to think of him not being here. She had loved him since they were 16 she gave him everything the last 4 years and maybe she shouldn't have. Maybe it would hurt less but she knew he would be back when he could. She didn't want to hold him back anymore no matter how much it tore her apart.

Jaxs didn't want to leave her she was the love of his life but she would never ask him to stay and he knew that. She wouldn't ask him to pick her over the club cuss she knew the answer he would pick her over anything. John had trouble with trusting his brothers in the past year and Jaxs had shown his loyalty to his father and the club so many times. It made john so proud he hated to ask his son this but it was a huge honor. Jaxs was going to Ireland for awhile to settle some business for the club. John would normally do this but the club needed him there and it was a long job none knew how long. They needed people they trusted.

It was time for the good byes Jaxs had a plan to right everyday to call as much as he could but Tara had another. Tara didn't know how long it was going to be no one did so she knew what she had to do it make it easier on both of them. She was going to set him free.

He saw her trying to be brave for him and she pulled it off quite well years of practice with her father, brother and him made it a routine but never made saying goodbye easy.

Tara wrote him a letter shoved it in his bag " Don't read it until you get there promise" Tara said with a smile. She always wrote him a letter if he was going to be gone for more than a night and he would do the same; it was always something sweet and a little taught but not this time. She couldn't bare to see his face when he read it

"Got to love a dirty letter from you baby" jaxs remarked. He handed her an envelope.

"Be safe" Tara whispered

"Always for you" jaxs said. Those words ripped Tara's heart apart. There lips met with a fire that entranced the two into a daze of wanting more as they always did. Tara never wanted to leg go of him. She wanted to remember them like this forever.

"Lets ride" some one yelled

They slowly pulled apart and she watched that Teller smirk ride away

My love,

You have given me the best 4 years any girl could ask for but you had to leave and I don't want you distracted. I want you to do the job like you do best so you need to let me go. I don't want to hold you back. I will love you forever but this is the life we chose. I want you to have a full and happy life even if its not with me.

Yours always

Tara

Jaxs read the letter with tears in his eyes but deep down he knew she was right and for two years he did as she said he had a few chances to come for a few days but refused he couldn't bare to see her until it was for good

No one told Jaxs about the babies Tara made sure of it she didn't want him to fell the guilt of leaving her with two kids it wasn't his fault. She resented john for keeping him away for 2 years. She barley spoke to him, but he understood. He gave Jaxs dozen of chances to come home but he wouldn't always made an excuse but now everything was done and he was on his way back and John was going to tell her.

Tara was at the club house dropping off some food for the boys Luanne always made some good food for them at least twice a week and Tara or Donna would drop it off. Tara knew why her mom did it cuss they were family and no matter what you stuck by your family. The boys looked at Tara but they all knew she would always be Jaxs girl and no one dared to cross that line. Tara and Jaxs spent a lot of time in this place and it was reminder he wasn't here and she was starting to believe he chose to stay there.

"Tara can we talk" John yelled across the room. Tara didn't care for John but she knew how little she mattered in the end. It was all about the club the women were just something to entertain the men at least the singles. Tara flowed John into his office

"what's up?" Tara asked she knew it was something if he wanted to talk in his office

"well Jaxs is on his way back he should be here tonight we are having a welcome home party of him; I thought maybe you would want to be here" John said he knew this was going to be a hard conversation but had to be done.

"What do you want me to show up and act like your not the reason I became a single parent. Why my daughters don't know their father. I don't blame him I don't blame the club I blame you. You could have sent someone else up there after I had the babies but no you couldn't even let him come home once in TWO FUCKING YEARS!" Tara screaming at him she couldn't believe it she avoided this conversion for 2 years because she knew it would end up like this Tara going off looking just like everything she strived not to do anymore. She had a bad temper and tried to keep it under control for her girls.

"You got it out your system now. I've been waiting for you to finally let it out I am surprised it took you this long. I never wanted this for you too, but the truth is you're the one who ended it with him. You're the one who set him free, but I wanted you to be prepared because he deserves to know the truth love and you need to be the one who hands it to him. No one is going to spill the beans you have my word no body wants that back lash on them. I get why you did it believe me, but its not going to make the truth hurt any less." John said he hated everything about it but the truth had to be said. He only wanted the best for Tara and Jaxs but he had a felling things were going to get worse before they got better.

Tara got out of the club house as fast as she could to figure out what she was going to do.