Disclaimer: I own nothing Harry Potter related, but I doown a bit imagination

Dedication: This is dedicated to Macca for being a wonderful beta!

A/N: Now, before this story starts, i'd like to say that i'm not bagging the couple that is Lily and James. I've been toying with this idea for a while, and I know it's going to go further. I hope you like it!

If she traced it back to the beginning, it would have to have started a few months after their special day.

James had walked in, all smiles, and talked about his day. Lily had been only too happy to listen, but as he rambled on her mind had wandered elsewhere. Somewhere she was ashamed to go, but in the least curious.

"Lily?" James asked, flapping his hand in front of her face. "You were off in la-la land!"

"Ahh, well you know how I love to travel there," she said smiling. "Now, what would you like for dinner?"

"Anything you can rustle up. Padfoot has nothing in his fridge and my stomach is rumbling."

"You didn't say you'd been at Sirius's house."

There was a pause.

"Yes I did. Probably while you were in la-la land."

"Probably…" she trailed off.

---

That night James stayed up late, and Lily allowed her mind to wander somewhere she promised herself she'd never go. She suddenly realised what she was doing and mentally scolded herself. She'd never thought about something like that, and it made her feel dirty, like she was doing something incredibly wrong. She needed someone to hold her. She looked over to the other side of the bed and noticed James wasn't there.

Slowly she got out of bed and walked down the corridor and down the stairs, where she could see a light on in the lounge room. As she walked in she winced at the sight of James snoring loudly on the sofa. She knelt down beside him, but reeled back at the stench of alcohol on his breath.

She got up and walked back to the bedroom, wondering what had gone wrong. And as she led down she fell into a restless sleep, where her mind was free to wander.

---

"I'm back!" Lily called, putting the shopping bags on the kitchen floor and collapsing into a chair by the table.

She sighed, leaned back and closed her eyes, waiting for a reply. When none came for a minute she opened her eyes again. She cast them over to the kitchen bench, and to the kettle, where the note she had left was still propped up.

She got up and walked over to the bin and grabbed then note, screwing it up. And as she dropped it in the bin one part was showing.

I love you

She stared at it for a while and then slammed the lid onto the bin.

"JAMES!" she shouted up the stairs. When she got not reply she stomped up the stairs loudly and walked into the bedroom. She sighed at the sight. James was still asleep in bed, moving slightly as if in a dream.

She took no hesitation in lifting up one side of the mattress and he slid off the edge landing with a thump on the floor.

"What the hell?" asked a muffled voice, as James picked himself up off the floor. He blinked a few times, blinded by the sunlight. "Oh Merlin my head!" he muttered, jamming his head under a pillow.

"James, it's twelve o'clock and you've been sleeping for the whole morning, now get up before I have to drag you down the stairs by the ankles!"

"Ok, ok, I'm up!" he muttered, stumbling over the sheets that were now all over the ground.

He stared at her receding back, wondering just what had gone wrong between them, and if there was a way he could possibly fix it.

---

Yes, that had been the beginning. When they had started to crumble.

Lily sighed and got up from the kitchen table. She went into the lounge room and picked up the empty fire whisky bottles and threw a blanket over James, who was snoring loudly on the sofa.

She walked to the front door and pulled on her cloak. She had someone to see.

A/N: Tell me what you thought please!