Ch 1

The Doctor held his son close to his chest as he walked into the room with the girls. He tried to not look like he'd been sobbing, hoping the girls wouldn't notice.

The girls ran to him, staring at the bundle in his arms, "Is that my baby brother?!" Freya exclaimed, as Arthur whined again, asking where River went.

"Yes," he nodded, not answering Arthur. "Indoor voices now." He put a finger over his lips and crouched for the girls to see their brother.

"Can I hold him?" Amelia asked, as both girls peered over to look at their brother.

"Sure. But you have to sit down and be very gentle."

She nodded scurrying into a seat and holding out her arms. He shifted the baby into her arms, keeping his hands there as support.

"Can I see Mummy?" Freya asked, looking up at the Doctor, completely innocent of what had happened.

He hesitated, chest tightening and mouth suddenly quite dry. "Don't you want to hold your little brother first?" He managed.

She thought about it, then nodded, waiting quite impatiently for her turn. Arthur whined in Amelia's arms, grumpy that it wasn't his mummy. Amelia was perplexed at the little boy who breathed and moved and made noise unlike her other brother.

"I wanna hold him not! It's my turn." Freya held out her arms.

"Keep your voice down, lovie. Arthur can't handle loud noise yet." He moved to take his son back. Arthur started crying again, wanting River even more now and missing the comfort of her thoughts. "Sh... sh, lovie. It's okay, you're alright." He tried to comfort, letting Freya hold him.

Freya held him for a few moments before making a face, "He's too loud."

"I know. He's just upset right now." He scooped Arthur back up. "Babies tend to cry a lot when they're upset." He explained.

"What is he upset?" She asked.

He felt fresh pain in his hearts at the question, knowing that they couldn't be oblivious forever. "Because he wants Mummy."

"Well then let's go see Mummy." Freya stood up, about to head for the room River was in.

"Wait, Freya. You can't go in there." He panicked, feeling a bit sick about having to tell them their mother was dead. "I need to tell you something. I've got to tell both of you."

"What is it?" Freya asked, turning to face him.

He swallowed hard, sitting in front of them. "Sometimes... when a baby is born, the birth doesn't always go well. It's not too often, but sometimes the mummy or the baby doesn't always... end up okay."

"Where's Mummy?" Amelia demanded, sensing where the conversation was headed.

"She's... she's gone to be with your other little brother." He whispered. He hoped River was at least given the chance to see William.

"What do you mean gone?" Amelia whimpered, "I want her to come back."

"I do too, but she isn't coming back." His voice broke.

"No!" She started to cry, running towards the room, "Mumma! Mumma!"

"Amelia!" He called, not wanting her to go in there yet. River hadn't been cleaned up and there was far too much blood for the little five year old to witness.

She refused to listen, running into the room and stopping when she saw River. Vastra, who was still in there and had begun to clean up her friend, looked up in alarm. "Amelia, you shouldn't be in here."

Amelia just stood, staring at her mother. Her lip trembled and tears cascaded down her cheeks as she stepped a bit closer, "Mummy? Mummy wake up."

Vastra walked over to the girl, crouching in front of her to block her view. "Now is not the time, Amelia. You must go back to your father until it's okay to come in here."

"No! I want my Mummy!" She sobbed, trying to move past her and reach her hand out to River.

Vastra caught Amelia in her arms. "Your Mummy is gone, little one. I'm so sorry, but that is the way things are now."

Amelia collapsed into a bundle of sobs, "She promised. She can't be gone, she promised. I want my Mummy! I need my Mummy!" Vastra gathered her up and rocked her, murmuring and trying to soothe her. Amelia pushed her away, not wanting anyone's comfort, only wanting River.

The Doctor came in without Freya, making a point of not looking at River's corpse. "Amelia..."

She didn't respond, curing into a tighter ball, crying hysterically. The Doctor handed Arthur to Vastra so he could scoop up his daughter. This was a promise to River he was going to try hard to keep. "Sh... Amelia, I know this is scary and I know how sad you are, but I'm still here for you, alright?" He sighed. "Do you want to be with Mummy?"

She nodded, crying into him. "I don't want her to be gone."

He nodded, bringing her over to River's corpse. "Listen to me, sweetheart. When you lose someone close to you, it's going to hurt for a very long time. Not physically, but on the inside. It's going to feel like this every time you think about it or find something of hers that she left behind, or even if a pillow still smells like her, it's going to hurt." He started to cry again. "But it's going to ache a little bit less every day. That doesn't mean to tomorrow you're going to feel better, because tomorrow she won't be back. But I promise, it won't feel like this forever. She'll always be with you, in your hearts. You'll find little pieces of her everywhere. You've got her eyes. Arthur has her smile. We all have her love. We'll always have that."

Amelia reached down, wanting to hug her mother. If she closed her eyes, and ignored the coldness of her body, it was almost as if River was still there, hugging her back.

He set her down and let her hug her mum. The sight was enough to tear him apart all over again. "Vastra... can you bring Freya in here? She's with Jack."

She nodded, leaving the room to get the girl. Amelia whimpered as she cuddled further into River. He rubbed her back in a soothing motion.

Jack and Vastra came in with Freya after a few minutes. Jack carrying the girl and Vastra carrying the baby. Amelia looked up at her sister. "I d-don't think Mu-Mummy's coming b-back."

Freya had been crying as well, those words only making her cry harder now. "But she promised. She promised we'd all be together." Jack put Freya down next to her sister and she mirrored Amelia.

"It's the b-bad sleep. She's n-not gonna wake up."

"But she hasta wake up!" She cried at the feeling of how cold her mother was, "Who's going to read us stories and give us kisses?"

Amelia looked at her father. "W-w still have Daddy..."

"But I want Daddy and Mummy." She whimpered.

"Me too!" Amelia found herself in a new bout of tears. Both girls curled up against River, sobbing. All they wanted was to hear her voice again, feel her arms around them and get one last kiss from her.

Vastra and Jack bowed their heads at the mourning family. Jack was probably the only one in the room who was still keeping Missy in mind.

Amelia and Freya both stayed curled up against their mother's body for what seemed like hours. Arthur started to wail loudly again. The Doctor eventually took his son back, comforting him against his chest. "He's hungry..."

"I'll go find some formula." Vastra murmured, leaving to go to the other room.

He sat back with the girls, watching them sniffle. Arthur's sobs suddenly stopped, staring at a seemingly blank space in the air beside the Doctor. He frowned in confusion. "Not hungry any more?"

The baby continued to stare at the space, gurgling something about Mummy to the empty air. His hearts stuttered and he turned around. In Arthur's eyes, River was standing there, smiling and whispering how everything was going to be alright, but to the girls, who had also looked up, the space was empty.

The Doctor investigated the air, turning in a complete circle with but ending up disappointed when he found nothing but cold. His eyes trailed back to River's body, reminding himself painfully that his wife was dead now and whatever Arthur was looking at wasn't real. At least the boy wasn't crying now, but that made him the only one in the room who wasn't.

Freya looked angrily on at her brother, her eyes still swimming with tears. "Freya, lovie..." The Doctor said, sensing her mood change. "What's the matter?"

"Why is he smiling?" She was getting angrier, "This is his fault! It's his fault that Mummy's gone!"

"Freya, it's not his fault. It was no one's fault, sometimes these things happen with no reason." It wasn't entirely true, but there were too many reasons to blame that playing 'pass the fault' would take days. "Maybe he just sees something new and it made him smile. Everything's new to him."

"It is his fault!" She cried, a fresh wave of tears coming, "If he wasn't born then she wouldn't be gone!" She shouted, "I don't want a little brother anymore, I want Mummy!"

He instinctively held the baby closer. "Freya... this was Mummy's choice."

She blinked, "What?"

He sighed heavily, sitting back down. "Your Mum and I... we knew that this would happen. We knew for a long time, and we had a choice. We could chose to have your little brother or... not have him. And Mummy chose his life."

Her lip trembled, "Why would she do that? Why would she choose to leave me?"

"She didn't want to leave you, sweetheart. She wanted you both to be happy. You two have wanted a little brother for a very long time now. She wanted you to have him, she wanted him to have a life." He remembered again how happy she was to hear her son cry.

"But I don't want him anymore!" She cried, "I don't want him here!"

"Now, don't say things like that." He frowned. "Wishing him away isn't going to bring Mummy back. Mummy wanted him, I want him, and you'll learn to want him here, too." He looked at his son. "Mummy's part of him. She's part of all of us."

She crossed her arms, "I won't learn to want him, I'll never want him. It's his fault Mummy's not here and I'll never forgive him!"

He blinked at her, trying to assure himself that her feelings would in fact change and this reaction was only in the heat of her grief. "I'm sorry you feel that way right now, but Mummy isn't coming back and he's not leaving."

She stared angrily at him, before cuddling back into River's side. He wanted to hug her and tell her it would be okay, but he knew he'd be pushed away. Vastra returned with the formula in a bottle and gave it to the Doctor, who tried to feed it to Arthur.

Arthur's gaze had shifted to the Doctor's shoulder, and he had been making sounds as if trying to get someone's attention, though it wasn't directed at the Doctor. He fussed when given the bottle, still staring just past his father.

"Arthur, there's nothing there." He looked over his shoulder again to make sure. "See? Please, just drink? I know it's not as good as what Mummy could give you, but it's all you've got."

Arthur's wailing suddenly grew louder, the noise sounding distressed and resembling the words come back. Freya blocked her ears, "Shut up!" She shouted, even though she knew she wasn't allowed to say that phrase.

"Freya, we do not say things like that." He frowned at her disapprovingly.

"I can say whatever I want and I want him to shut up!" She shouted at the baby who only cried louder.

"You're going to get a timeout if you keep up with that attitude. I know you're upset and hurt, but that doesn't give you the right to say things like that."

"Make him stop crying!"

"I can't. He wants Mummy." He said quietly.

"Well then he deserves to cry because it's his fault that she's gone." She clung to River.

"Alright, that was your last chance." He said more sternly. "You've just earned yourself a time out."

"No!" She sobbed, burying her face into River's side, not wanting to be taken away from her.

"You can survive three minutes. Vastra, could I have some help?"

"No! No! No! Please, no!" She was making the most distraught screams a child could make, clinging to River with her life. "Mumma! No!"

The Doctor and Vastra hesitated before Vastra spoke up. "If you apologize to your father and promise no longer to speak so rudely, you can stay." She was crying too much by now to say anything, her whole body shaking with sobs. Vastra scooped up the girl and rocked her. "Hush now, dear."

The Doctor nodded his appreciation, trying to get Arthur to latch again.

"No!" Freya screamed when she was removed from River's side, "Put me down! No! Mummy!"

"You can go back when you apologize." Vastra's stern voice was more intimidating than the Doctor's.

"NO!" Her screams were growing loud enough to carry through the walls, "Mummy! No!" Vastra sighed and brought her to the other room for her time out.

"Doc, are you sure this is the best time to be punishing her?" Jack sighed.

He shook his head. "No.. I just don't know what to do. River was always better at this."

"This is the last time she's ever going to physically be with River. We shouldn't be taking it away from her. She's acting out because she's upset, now is not the right time for punishment."

"I know, you're right." He squeezed his eyes shut. "Arthur, why won't you eat? Please, for Daddy?"

Jack went to go bring Freya back. Arthur finally took the bottle, only eating a little before crying.

The Doctor went to sit in the corner chair, trying to get him to eat more as he watched the people in front of him. Amelia had been silent the whole time, almost as still as her mother. She was still crying, a small, forgotten bundle of sorrow. Freya was a puddle of sobs and incoherent complaints in Vastra's arms as she was brought back and placed back in her previous spot.

It was going to be a long night.