In case you didn't catch it in the description: SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT

Wow. Last night's episode was... insane. I think in the long run its good. I think the writers can use this to make the eventual Delena relationship more real. But for right now... wow.

I had to write this as a way to vent and because I want Damon to fight back. Not with Rebecca, necessarily, but somehow. He needs to stand up for himself here. So I hope this helps give you a little peace also.

Side note: Thanks for the great response to Choose Your Own Path. I really appreciate the reviews and the support! I will update the story as soon as I can, but I had to get this off my chest first. And maybe a couple more chapters of this... I have an idea for where I want it to go.

XOXO

Elena took a deep breath as she eased open the door to the Boardinghouse and stepped inside. She'd waited as long as she could, but there was no way she was going to let the night end without making things right with Damon. That was hard to do when he wouldn't answer her calls.

So here she was, standing in his foyer in her pajama pants and a hoodie, still struggling not to ask herself why she cared so much.

"Damon?" She spoke quietly, knowing he would hear her whether she whispered or yelled. "Damon, please, I know you're here and I really need to talk to you."

He appeared in the doorway of the main room in a flash of silent lightning. His hair was mussed and he wore only a pair of black silk boxers. A drink was in his hand and a carefully casual look masked his face. He raised an eyebrow at her. "Elena. To what do I owe this inconvenience?"

She stepped toward him, letting her genuine apology read in her eyes. "You didn't answer my calls. I wanted to explain…"

He took a slow sip of his drink before narrowing his eyes at her, a tight, humorless smile on his lips. "I can't think of a single thing you need to explain. So go home."

"I'm sorry." Elena wrapped her arms around herself. "I didn't mean what I said. Of course it's not a problem that you…"

"That I love you?" He cut her off, tossing back the last swallow of his drink and tossing it over his shoulder. The sound of the glass shattering against the floor made her jump and he smirked. "You're right, Elena. It's not a problem. Not anymore."

"Damon, don't do this."

He pursed his lips together and nodded. "Right, of course. This is the part of the evening where you tell me what to feel." He edged toward her. When he spoke, he did a poor imitation of her voice. "Come on, Damon, I know you can feel something. You can't really switch off your feelings. I'll make you feel. Look at my pretty smile and my big brown eyes. Ooo, now I'm going to insist on getting close to you, on worming my way into your cold, dead heart."

"Damon, stop." Elena's voice cracked and she felt tears welling up. "Please."

"No, we can't stop there, Elena." Damon hovered over her. "Not there. It's not enough just to tear open old wounds and keep insisting I find my humanity again, no matter how much pain it causes me. No, then there's the part where I feel everything again, when I spend every moment of my day terrified that something is going to happen to you because I know I wouldn't want to live if you were dead, when all I want is one hint that you care about me. And after that part…" He chuckled coldly, "well then comes the part where my love becomes a problem. Where all the things you made me feel become inconvenient for you. That's my favorite part, Elena. What's your favorite part?"

"It's not like that." Elena tried to reach out to touch him but he shrunk back from her as though her touch would wound him deeper than vervain ever could. "I don't not want you to love me, Damon. I don't."

He nodded, his eyes narrow, his jaw clenched. "Oh, I know. Trust me, I get it. You want me to love you just enough to keep me around, to give you little butterflies now and then, to keep me cleaning dead hybrids off your porch." He shook his head. "But real love… real, all-consuming, breath-stealing, I-would-die-for-you love… you don't want that from me, Elena." He held up his hands, palms out. "Well your wish is my command. Now you don't have it."

He turned away from her and Elena felt her heart break inside her chest. For once she didn't stop to think. She moved after him, grabbing his arm and turning him around. She looked deep into his eyes, letting herself feel all the emotion she saw there, and then she rose up on her toes and pressed her lips to his.

He kissed her back hard, gripping the back of her head in one of his hands and holding her to him so he could kiss her with bruising force for a few short seconds.

And then he pushed her away, anger flashing in his eyes. "Never do that again." He snarled the words at her as she tried to catch her breath. "You don't get to do that."

Tears fell freely down her cheeks now and she tried to find a way to explain. "Damon, don't shut your feelings down like this. Please. We can work this out. We can… I want to."

"I don't." His whole body seemed to loom over hers and his eyes… the look in them chilled her. "I am done being the second choice, Elena. I can't do it again. You will never feel for me what you felt for Stefan and it was stupid of me to think you ever could."

"You don't know that."

"I can see it all over your face." He moved closer to her and took her chin in his hands, forcing her to meet his eyes. "Look me in the eye and tell me. Tell me you didn't try to reach Stefan tonight. That you didn't try to reconnect with him. Convince me, Elena."

She opened her mouth, wishing the words would come, but she knew she honestly tell him what he wanted to hear. And she knew that trying to explain that she just needed closure with Stefan, she just needed to understand what had happened to them, was pointless. He wouldn't understand. She let her eyes plead with him. "Damon…"

"I thought so." Bitterness laced through his tone. "Let me explain the situation, Elena. Stefan doesn't want to care about you anymore because it hurts too much to feel. But no matter how hard he pushes you away, you will always go back to him because there is something about him that, frankly, I don't understand at all. But its there and you can't fight it. Or you don't want to."

"I don't want to be with Stefan."

"It's rude to interrupt, Elena." Damon's cold tone grew colder. "As I was saying, you're too blind to see that your precious first love is gone forever. You were too blind to see that there was someone who was willing to change everything, to work day in and day out to deserve you. You slapped real love in the face one too many times."

"No." Elena tried to move toward him.

"Yes!" Damon practically shouted the word at her as he held her off. "And here's the most important thing. Are you ready? I've figured it out. See, if there's something about you that means no one will ever see you for the person you could be, that means no one will ever really love you… then you're free."

"That's not true, Damon." Elena let the tears fall, reaching out toward him. "I love you. Stefan loves you."

He moved toward her, invading her space, crowding her against the wall, his eyes wide and dangerous. Lifting a hand, he swept her hair behind her ear and then met her eyes. "Well stop. Because from now on, I'm free. And I'm no one's second choice." He stepped back. "Now get out of my house, Elena."

He turned and strode out of the room, leaving her against the wall, unable to stop the free flow of tears. She watched him walk away, the pain in her chest growing with every passing second, and in that second she knew. She had broken him, and it hurt more than anything, because she suddenly understood with absolute clarity that he was it for her.

She loved him. And she had lost him.

XOXO

*Deep Breath* Well I feel a little better. Damon needed this.

But. I'm too much of a Delena fan to leave them here. So I hope you stay tuned for more and I hope you'll leave me a review!