Note: Well! I honestly don't know where this one came from, other than the fact that I asked my followers on Tumblr to leave me some words in my ask ("for science!"). So, here we go. I've been meaning to do another one of these since Thirteen. Hm, this was supposed to be mainly Lanille, but it seems a bit Fanille as well!
Disclaimer: I do not own FFXIII.
I. Return
When you were awoken by a warm breeze and piercing light blocked by your eyelids, the first word you murmured was, "why?" It wasn't until a shadow fell over you that you stopped convincing yourself it was part of a series of endless dreams you should have been experiencing with the one person you considered your only and true family. When you opened your Sapphire eyes you were met by striking baby blues, a sting fluttered in your throat as you croaked, "why?"
Why must you be apart? Why must you be alone?
II. Dream I
The days after were spent gathering survivors from Cocoon's fall, the soldier did her job dutifully and returned to your shared tent late in the night to find you crying, most times. She fumbles, awkwardly brushes the tears away and does the only thing she knows how to do, she holds you like she used to her sister. you're grateful that she doesn't talk to you, you feel as though you'll crumble the moment the first word escapes your mouth, and you feel stupid. Pathetic. Fang wouldn't have wanted this.
Most nights it takes you an hour to finally calm down, lull into a bitter, empty sleep, just as the sun is rising and it's time for the soldier to step back into her ranks.
III. Wings
In your mind, you remembered the soldier's crimson cape snapping behind her, like the single great wing of a majestic being. A powerful goddess wounded and left on the paradise in the sky that was so much more like a Hell on Earth than your own home was scornfully titled.
Sometimes, you would reach out and grab it, expecting the soft luster of feathers, only to be met by rough fabric and a questioning glance.
"Can we rest?" You would cover up, hiding your disappointment.
IV. Lost
An inner turmoil danced behind her baby blue eyes, you knew well enough to understand what it meant. She was giving up hope, when everyone else was finding it with each advance in their journey to create a new home, she was recoiling, backing away from her plight and keeping it all to herself. She had no place in this happiness, where everyone had someone.
You could only watch, because how could two wounded creatures save each other?
V. Shelter I
It takes months for the first village to be completed, months of constant hard work and effort from every single survivor in your small group. Many have already branched out to settle in other areas, Sazh and Hope are long gone.
The huts are made mostly from wood and debris that fell from Cocoon, they're weak, but you suppose they are strong enough to survive the rains. Ironically, it pours the very day construction ends and everyone flees into shelter. This is the day Lightning invites you to live with her, and you don't get a second chance to think, the prospect of a proper roof hanging over your head overruling any other judgments you might have.
When you rush in, she gives that throaty chuckle that, in the months you've spent with her, has found a way to make your heart skip.
You wonder if you can offer her a roof of your own to stand under someday.
VI. Hunt
"Like this," you remember stating the day the two of you go out to hunt, hunters traveled in packs, but Lightning figured the two of you would be enough so you split from your group unnoticed. You knew better, however, you had an idea of how to hunt, but Lightning only knew how to fight. She wasn't a hunter, she was a warrior. You weren't about to hurt her pride. After a few failed attempts on her part (you had managed to capture a wild hare), you settled on showing her how to properly sneak up on prey. How not to sloppily butcher, but to kill it cleanly.
When she gets her first kill, she smiles at you smugly, and for a second you think that she almost looks like Fang.
VII. Quiet
Some days it rains relentlessly, other days it is dry and hot. You don't mind, you like both circumstances because it feels so much like home. When you start thinking of home, you think of the past, a past with Fang.
Those moments you grow quiet, solemn, and Lightning takes note. Most days she brings something up, something random that you know she doesn't really care for. The soccer game the village kids are having on the beach tomorrow, Lebreau is having a special at her place tonight, simple things. You take these little comments with a false smile on your face. Other days, she invites you to patrol with her.
You look forward to those days, the rush of battle you had long since forgotten, the warm spark when a spell erupts from your hand. These were simple pleasures. These were things you had hated when you first awoke on Cocoon, things you have since learned to embrace because you were using them to protect.
At the end of the day, you are smiling again, and she looks on at you with relief written across her face.
Sometimes you wonder why it matters.
VIII. Hands
Her hands are calloused and rough, she believes they can only destroy. You tell her otherwise, that if that were true neither of you would be alive at that very moment. She scoffs, and says it wasn't her but Fang that saved everyone.
You shake your head, because you know Fang wouldn't want to take all the credit, and you correct her, "we all saved the world."
She doesn't argue, you figure she's had a long day, so you grab her hand and lead her to your shared bedroom. She surprises you, however, when she stops you midway to the room.
In the dim lit hut you can see a spark of regret in her eyes as she clasps your shoulders, "Vanille.."
You can't ask her if she's feeling okay, because she embraces you and mutters apologies. Saying that she should be up there, and not Fang, and if she could go into the past and trade places, she would in a heartbeat. She whispers about how badly she's screwed up, and that you don't deserve to be here alone.
And for the first time since the nights back in the tent you shared with her, you're the one raking shaking hands through her hair, cooing gentle words as she breaks down in your arms.
You wonder if two wounded creatures can save each other.
IX. Joy
The day Snow and Serah get married there is a large celebration. If you didn't know any better, you'd think royalty was passing through. Snow states that celebration is in honor of Fang's sacrifice, and you feel a bitter knot in your stomach. You don't falter, however, when you thank him. You know he doesn't mean anything bad from it.
Lightning is clad in a simple black dress, and you wonder if she's mourning rather than celebrating. But she's pleased, and you recall that she did give them her blessings, after all.
Her attention is on you the whole night, making you feel uneasy. There is a moment in the party when Snow is teasing Hope and the whole group is distracted by Lightning threatening the large man, where you slip undetected and leave the village, walking along the shore. The chatter fades, and soon enough, the lights flicker and shrink until they blend in with the starry backdrop.
It isn't until then that you stop and look up at the crystallized globe in the sky.
Fang is there, you think, and you wonder if she can see you. You wonder what she's dreaming about.
"It must be lonely," you whisper, "holding all of that weight on your shoulders."
X. Dream II
In some of your dreams, you are riding a fierce Chocobo beside Fang, laughter is ringing in your ears as she mockingly yells for you to pick up your pace if you want to eat dinner. It's one of those rare days where Fang invites you out to hunt and you accept the invitation without a second thought. You enjoy the thrill, the feeling of air rushing through your hair as your mount chases after a wild beast. You never get to fight, because Fang always flies ahead, always the better rider, and kills it before you even catch up.
In other dreams, you are a branded l'cie once again, escaping fate with your companions. In these dreams, you're the only one who remembers Fang. In this world, she doesn't exist, and every time you ask someone where she's gone, they look at you quizzically.
"You sure you didn't hit your head?" Sazh would ask sometimes. Snow would call out to Lightning, tell her that maybe the group should stop for a rest because you're acting delirious. Upset, you would run off as everyone else set up camp. No one would chase you, you would run until you couldn't run any longer and then you would collapse and cry.
When you opened your eyes, you felt lonelier than ever.
XI. Blue
Something about her eyes always captivated you, you didn't quite understand why it was only hers, Serah's rarely piqued your interest and they were the same shade. Lightning's always seemed to have a secret dancing behind them.
One day she stares at you until you feel uneasiness grasp you, and you have to ask her what she wants. She simply smiles and shrugs, to your irritation. "It must be something," You state matter-of-factly, "other wise you wouldn't be staring at me!"
"Maybe it is, maybe it isn't."She says, leaning over the counter playfully, "either way, what makes you think I'd even tell you?"
You pout slightly, and return to making dinner, ignoring her as she moves around the counter. You hardly notice her until she's behind you with an arm around your waist. You gasp, nearly cutting yourself, and quickly turn around to question her.
Her eyes are like open windows as she gazes at you, this time with a serious expression.
This close, you realize there are different hues of light blue specks in her eyes, almost like a mosaic piece, as if someone had taken a paintbrush and sprayed flecks of paint onto previously white orbs.
You are both so alone.
XII. Shelter II
"Can you take care of her?" Serah had come to visit you while Lightning had taken off on patrol, you stare at her with a confused expression, "I trust you, I really do Vanille. I know you will make her happy." The younger Farron smiles, and it's almost a heartbreaking smile. "But can you...can you take care of her?"
It takes you a moment to realize what she means by that, Lightning had reemerged differently back when you and your companions had awoken from your crystal slumber, as though a part of her soul had been left on Cocoon.
As if she were broken, and all the bandages, tape and glue in the world couldn't repair her. You know that.
At times she was fine, normal. But late at night you'd wake to find her seated, staring blankly at the wall or standing beside the window staring off at the glowing ocean. Some days she would look at you without any recognition, other days she would treat you like you were her long lost best friend returned from war. There were even times when she would blurt out a story from her past, her parents, friends, things she and Serah did when they were kids.
These things had started a month ago, and you began to wonder if she hadn't always been like this. Lightning was good at keeping things to herself, under the wraps.
But you were broken too, you note as you smile politely at Serah, "I can take care of her, Serah. Believe in me."
You can be her shelter.
The two of you had proven, that two wounded creatures couldn't heal one another, but they could protect each other with all they had.
