Today was July 30th. In District 4, this is usually the start day of Festivál tis Thálassas which in Greek means Festival of the Sea. It's a special 2-day holiday organized by the Mayor of District 4 and some of the board members each year to celebrate the value of our land and how 'grateful' we are. It's a pretty enjoyable celebration filled with carnival games, fun houses and haunted houses, some rides here and there, and face painting. Most citizens of District 4 my age volunteer to help out with setting things up or actually running the games for the duration of the festival. This year, I volunteered with face painting with Annie. Even though she doesn't know it yet, I want her to be with me just in case. All those people dressed in costumes, the loud noises, and strange sights might bring her into a flashback or something and I want her to be safe with me.
"Finnick" I hear a beautiful voice ring beside me on Annie and mine's plush bed ring in my ear. "Finnick wake up, guess what today is!" The voice pauses and waits for me to open my eyes. I smile wide and keep them closed and make snoring noises. Annie laughs and smacks my shoulder. "Finnick! Wake up!" I hear a smile in her voice.
"5 more minutes!" I try to whine dramatically like a child but fail epically and chuckle into my cloud-like pillow.
"Finnick! Today is the Festival! Come on get up! I wanna go!" She says as I feel the bed begin to bounce underneath me. Annie is so excited, I've never seen her so excited and jumpy like this before. This side of her is so cutely childish and adorable. I didn't even think she'd be excited in the first place. I open my eyes and turn over to face her. Her dark gorgeous brown hair is slightly tousled from the night's sleep and she's just her natural self. She is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I smile up at her as she sits staring down at me laying there.
"Okay okay, we'll go. Get dressed, get ready, do whatever you need to do and we'll leave as soon as you're all set, babe." I say, stretching my hands behind my head and draw out my legs out under the blankets. Annie runs her fingers through her hair as she contemplates what I just said. "I'm ready right now." She says, smiling evilly. I laugh because even though she's attempting to look sly, she looks more like a kitten trying to be like a tiger. It's endearing.
"Ha-ha, nice try. If we go in the way you're dressed right now…" I shake my head, looking over her white, silk nightgown and imagining all the hormone-fueled teenage boys at the festival and all the other men with eyes who will be staring at Annie, thinking about what they want to do with her. What they think she'll do to them. How they think they'll be with her after they don't know anything what she's been through and how fragile she is. How they build fantasies and how I'll want to kill them just like I killed all those other people. I grimace and close my eyes. I don't want to kill anyone. I had to kill those people or I'd be dead. I feel the rage build up inside me. Stop thinking about it! It's not going to happen, she was joking! How I'll want to kill them. I'll want to kill them. Kill them. My hands ball up into fists.
"Finnick" Annie's voice grows concerned. I could only imagine her face now; so sweet and curious. "Finnick, are you okay?" she puts her hand on my back. "Finnick calm down, whatever it is, it's okay." She says all child-like emotion drained from her voice trying to calm me down. You always ruin it, Finnick. You ruin all her fun. Why is she even with you? You should've stayed at the Capitol. She doesn't need this. The disgusting voice in my head scowled. I force my eyes open and stare at Annie's face. Don't listen, don't listen. I grabbed Annie's hands and brought it to my face. I kissed her hand to try and bring me back to this delightful moment we had just moments before.
"I'm fine." I force a smile and tried to believe it myself. "I'm really fine." I nod and hope that was convincing. "Go get ready; we have a festival to get to for crying out loud! I signed us up for volunteer! Let's go, let's go, let's go!" I shout clapping my hands for emphasis. Annie laughs nervously as if not sure how to take in my serious mood-swing there. She jumps out of the bed runs to the dresser to get and outfit ready.
I slowly get out of bed and bring myself to the shower. I smoothly slide open the glass doors to our shower and reach for the handle. I clutch the silver handle and crank it all the way to the hot side. There's nothing like the calming effects of a steaming hot shower. I slip off my checkered boxers and jump into the shower. I feel instantly relieved as the water washes over me. Half way through my shower, I hear Annie talking. Who is she talking to? The talking goes on all throughout the shower. I hear it as I wash my hair and I get extremely curious. I finish off in the shower; wrap a towel around my waist and go over to see what Annie is doing. It's not like she hasn't done it before. She talks to a lot of things; Shoelaces, the hair on her head, and other various inanimate objects. I look to see her back turned to face me as she sits dressed and all ready to go on our bed, waiting for me to finish. I creep up slowly as she says "Just because you're little, doesn't mean you don't have feelings, little guy." I cock my head to the side, and water drips down from my hair and descends down my face. I wipe it away and listen in closer. "I mean, you must feel really bad. Everyone thinks you're creepy and they just swat at you to try and kill you, and all you're doing is trying to make a nice home!" she coos. "And it's not like you bother them. You're just a little spider."
"Annie?" I ask out into the open. Annie jumps slightly on the bed, surprised, she says "Finnick! I didn't know you where here… I was just-"
"It's okay Annie," I sigh. Annie walks over to the open window and leads the spider out. "Go little buddy, go free." Then her voice lowers to a whisper "Don't listen to Finnick, he's just a big baby. For some reason he's scared of you!" she giggles and gently places the spider on the window sill. "Okay Finnick, it's gone. You don't have to be scared anymore."
"Oh yes, of course. I was scared." I say sarcastically, roll my eyes, and stroll over to the dresser containing my clothing. "Hmm, what to wear…" I pick through the drawer, just to humor Annie.
"Hurry up, slow-poke!" Annie says jokingly, throwing her hands up and walking out the door. "Or I'll go without you!"
"Okay! I'm hurrying!" I pick up a blue t-shirt with the logo Abercrombie & Fitch on it and pull it over my head, with my hair still wet. Then I reach and snatch some plaid white and blue shorts on the floor and put them on. I join Annie at the door, grab her hand and we both walk out together.