Disclaimer: Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I own Nothing, You can't Sue!

A/N: I don't know if any of you have seen the Mortal Komedy videos on YouTube, but I recommend you watch them after you read this. Video has the advantage of sweet editing, as well as background music, which adds a lot. For those of us who prefer to read though, enjoy!

Sub-Zero mumbled in his sleep. He was having good dreams.

"Mortal Kombat champion…mmmnn…fatality…….heh…EH?!"

At this point, his alarm went off, causing the "EH?!" part at the end there. Our favorite Lin Kuei promptly froze said alarm clock, and calmly reached over and smashed it to bits. Groggily, he got out of bed and went into the kitchen.

He removed a big bucket of ice cream from his freezer, put some in a bowl, and walked into the living room of his apartment, trying to wake up. He turned on the TV, and sat on the couch.

A strange ad was running.

"Buy my new shampoo, Pantene-Soul V! Your hair has never been so full of soul! In fact, if you order now, you'll get this cell phone, $199.99 value cost, FREE! Except for your SOUL! Uh…I mean, free of charge. Except for your soul."

Another voice, deeper this time, came on. "So what are you waiting for? Buy Shang Tsung's Pantene-Soul V today."

Tsung came back on. "And remember," he said, "Your hair care is MINE!"

At that exact moment, someone yelled out "GET OVER HERE!" and a spear went whizzing past Sub-Zero's head.

"SCORPION!" yelled Sub-Zero, "You've ruined my breakfast for the last time!"

Then he froze him, quickly finished off his ice cream, and stood up again as Scorpion thawed out.

"Now, time to-AH! BRAIN FREEZE!"

"Now you're mine!" yelled Scorpion, and he charged. Unfortunately, at that moment his cell phone began to ring. "Oh…hold on a second."

He answered his phone as Sub-Zero sighed.

"Hello? Yeah. Uh-huh. Uh-uh. Kay. Bye."

He hung up. During this little episode, Sub-Zero had attempted to punch him twice, but was shooed off by Scorpion.

"Sorry, Sub-Zero, but I gotta GET OUT OF HERE!"

Sub-Zero sighed. "Now I'm gonna be late for my meeting at the Lin Kuei!"

Johnny Cage entered a plain room. Two intimidating fighters entered from the opposite side. One of them spoke.

"You're not gonna leave here alive, Cage."

"Alright," said Cage, removing his sunglasses from is shirt pocket and putting them on. "Let's dance."

His two adversaries played a game of rock paper scissors. Both rock. Again. Both paper. Again. One rock, one paper.

"Damn it!" cursed the one who got rock. He then moved in on Cage. What followed after was a frenzy of physical force, in which Johnny Cage beat the tar out of both his opponents.

Finally, he looked at the one left standing, and sighed. "This is the part where you fall down, moron!"

"CUT! No it isn't, Johnny Cage, baby, you're killing me!" Cried the director of the movie that was being filmed. "He's supposed to beat you!"

"What?! Well, then, I'm not doing this movie."

"Did you even read the script???"

"Psh. No, but I'm the star, I should win, right?"

"Johnny, baby, this movie's called THE DEATH OF JOHNNY CAGE!"

"Who would watch a movie called THAT?"

"WHAT?!"

Johnny then promptly punched him in the groin and walked out.

Meanwhile, at Liu Kang's shack, he was busy punching the walls and calling it training. Suddenly, Raiden teleported into his house. He looked around at the falling-apart shack.

"I see your housekeeping is as good as your fighting."

"I could beat you any day, Raiden."

"Show me how!"

The two sparred for a brief period, until Kang ran into a wall after Raiden moved out of the way of his kick.

"Man, you suck." Raiden said. "Shut up!" came Liu's response.

"Listen, I came here to tell you something important, but I don't know if I should now."

Kang did not seem phased. "Okay." Was all he said. "Shut up!" said Raidenhis eyes flashing blue as thunder rolled.

"I can do that!" said Kang. He then attempted to do so, focusing until his face turned red and he fell over. Raiden covered his face as his champion moaned in pain. "Meet me here." he said, tossing a piece of paper at Liu Kang.

"OW, papercut!"

"…"

"…"

"The Earth is doomed." Raiden left.