"Our situation is catastrophic!" Tetsuzaemon Iba, the president of the Shinigami Men's Association, was thundering. "Our rivals took over our funds! We barely manage to rent the meeting room with our fees, but soon even this won't be enough!"
Those present paid more or less attention to his words, Iba was visibly hotting up.
"We have to aid our budget, whatever it takes," he called. "We are men, aren't we?"
The murmur of consent did an answer. Iba regarded the gathered with an approval.
"What do you usually do in such condition? What are the decisive measures, hmm?" he asked with a scowl.
There was a silence for one moment, and then some timid answers popped out.
"You sell your kit of Gotei 13 officers?"
"You go and beg your bread?"
"You close the club for good?"
Iba banged his fist on the desk.
"Idiots! You have to rent yourself! Sell yourself!"
There was a silence for a moment.
"Like... offer your services for money?" Kira asked, his face ever innocent.
Ukitake made a sound that resembled a muffled burst of a laughter. Iba looked at Kira like he just saw an octopus.
"I meant..." he started in a kind of resigned tone. "But you are right, Kira. Yeah, lad. That's what I meant," he said with renewed energy, confirming his words with another bang on the table. "We start tomorrow!"
Kira blinked.
"How it's going to be different from what we are doing normally?" he asked, but no-one listened to him.
Kira grasped the difference as soon as the following day. When in the afternoon he entered the meeting room, strangely transformed in a sense of a décor, and saw a considerable inscription on the wall: "By the Lieutenant - Escort Service", he regretted immediately and tried to left unnoticed. Unfortunately, Vice-Captain Iba clearly rejoiced at the sight of him, seized him and seated at the prepared place.
Could a life be more pathetic?
He spent several hours in the corner, making sure he knew an answer.
Vice-Captain Ōmaeda provided the room with some furniture from the attic of his manor, with an assumption to change the place into something cosy. In fact, he only proved his complete lack of taste. At first, Kira almost made a face, as his artistic heart of aesthete groaned in despair, but then he stopped noticing it, as he totally sunk in depression.
It was quite disturbing and not fully understandable for Kira coincidence, as for why the number of candidates for fulfilling an honourable task to aid the budget of the Shinigami Men's Association were reduced to exactly two. Hisagi-san was an obvious choice, even for Kira - but him? Such a pale moth? He swallowed. After initial shout of joy (small exaggeration) Vice-Captain Iba regarded Kira from head to foot and sagged a bit, which filled Kira with quite conflicting feelings of hope and... resentment. Then Vice-Captain Iba cleared his throat and firmly parted the upper part of Kira's shihakushō - but his look remained remarkably resigned. Kira was seated then in a place prepared for him, resisting the desire to put his uniform right and cover his torso, while the Vice-Captain of the Seventh Division walked away, muttering something like "innocent eyes", "delicate features", and "I don't think it will work". Equally upset Kira thought he heard Rangiku Matsumoto's name, but he couldn't be sure.
With feelings of jealousy, envy, and unfairness above all Kira thought of the fellow members who - that way or another - excused themselves from the special task. Captain Ukitake pointed at his unsure health condition, Akon at the final phase of his research, Harunobu was on holiday, and Ōmaeda didn't count from the start. President Iba watched over the whole business, while Vice-President Iemura looked after the cash. Kira then had too strong sense of duty to decline the orders, even though they opposed his inner instincts...
...After some hours, though, he decided we would gladly welcome some customers, because the total lack of interest depressed him much more he would have ever expected. Hisagi-san wasn't happier because of the given task, but - as opposed to Kira - his popularity didn't cease even for a moment, and his schedule was already booked a week in advance... Kira sighed. President Iba wouldn't delight of his utter lack of success, and this thought - combined with everything else - didn't comfort him. He was really hopeless...
He would like to go home. It was almost evening, the chances of any profit were minimal, and there was some considerable pile of the paperwork at the office. And... perhaps everything would turn out to be one of his nightmares, and he would wake up in the morning? President Iba, however, went out somewhere and Kira couldn't leave without a word. If only... If only Captain Ichimaru appeared, that would alter the matter. His duties towards the commander were absolute and he couldn't weight them less than responsibilities for an almost hobbistic organisation.
Kira dropped his head, knowing perfectly that he wasn't the one whose wishes ever came true.
Thus when Captain Ichimaru suddenly appeared in the entrance, Kira was sure he was hallucinating due to several hours of depression. It was possible, too.
Captain Ichimaru smiled at him, which reminded Kira that - hallucination or not - he should show his respect. He jumped up to his feet.
"Captain Ichimaru!" Iba-san called, appearing behind the guest. "How can I help you?" he asked.
"Wit' Kira Izuru," was an expected answer of the Captain of the Third Division. Kira started to hope that his torment came to an end. Whatever his Captain needed him to, it couldn't possibly be worse than sitting here doing nothing and the futile reflections on the misery of the life and his own wretchedness in particular. He wasn't mistaken, he would reflect later.
"Of course," Iba-san replied. "Kira, you are free-" he said in a farewell tone, but Captain Ichimaru didn't finish with him yet.
"How much is it?" he asked in a ringing voice, reaching into his sleeve.
The jingle of the coins was loud and clear in the silence that suddenly fell. Kira decided he experienced auditory hallucinations as well. Gin Ichimaru cast a fleeting and rather impassive glance at Hisagi, then looked at Kira again and smiled.
"I prefer the blonds," he explained in a tone clearly indicating the nature of this preference.
Kira slid into blessing unconsciousness with the last thought that some wishes should never come true.
He opened his eyes with a feeling it was softer around him than it was before he fell asleep - that he didn't remember anyway. He blinked. The ceiling didn't look anything familiar, and very disturbing thought crossed his mind: it wasn't his bedroom. Besides, he was wearing his shihakushō - so why had he slept? He blinked again and turn his head left just to see the completely unfamiliar room, now dimmed. He turn his head right... and closed his eyes, then looked again - but the view didn't disappear.
Beside him, resting his head on a hand, there lay Captain Ichimaru and looked at him from under lowered eyelids. He was smiling extremely gently.
"Good evenin', Izuru," he said softly, yet with clear joy, and so Kira couldn't doubt any more.
Kira shut his eyes tight, almost in panic searching for the last memories. Oh, they had to refer to Gin Ichimaru. Shinigami Men's Association, Vice-Captain Iba's horrible idea and even more horrible evening, that proved him his own wretchedness. And in the end, once again, he fell victim to his Captain's joke. And his pity, perhaps.
"Captain... I..." he started, trying to grasp the situation in order to act as he should, but then the soft hair brushed against his ear and a low voice said only to him:
"Ya can start offerin' me yer services, Izuru."
The world went dark once again...
...and when it brightened, Captain Ichimaru was looking at him with a slightest shade of a concern. His gaze was, however, much more intense than usually. Well, the condition they were in differed much from usual. Kira's eyelids fluttered.
"I'm glad ya decided to join, Izuru," there was one needle of irony in man's smiling voice, and Kira decided that the concern had been his imagination. "I'm not a very patien' person... and alone it's no fun."
Kira swallowed. So it wasn't a joke... a trick, a play, a game... a nightmare. There was no use to try and convince himself otherwise - especially when you were prone to accepting any pessimistic scenario at hand. If he'd only knew what listening to Vice-Captain Iba would end with, he would have never agreed to this madness. But then, he was still a Gotei 13 officer and he had his pride - even if it was hard to talk about the pride while sharing a bed with your own captain. He had his duties and responsibilities - even if they differed much from his normal duties and responsibilities. Perhaps he didn't look it, but at least he tried to be a professional and carry out his assignments carefully. He would manage this time - somehow - too. The problem was...
The problem was he didn't know what exactly was his area of responsibility now. Iba-san decided to save on the book of instructions of the... agency, and he dismissed all the questions about the range of the... services, and left the matter to his... employees' imagination. Kira swallowed again with a feeling the disaster was near. His imagination in the matter of the... escorting service was directly proportional to the one of Vice-Captain Iba who decided to dispose of those very services of Kira.
Kira only now realized that Captain Ichimaru took the strand of his hair between the fingers and played with it casually.
There was only one way to get out of this situation, as fast as possible. Yes, that was it - straight to the end, at it would be over.
"Captain... what... what have you... p-paid for?" he asked with a feeling his pride was only two sadly sounding words.
"Fer a week," answered Gin Ichimaru happily.
The world got dark much faster than before.
The hand touched his cheek so gently he would never expect.
"Ya can' faint all the time, Izuru," the bright voice of Gin Ichimaru rang with the slightest note of the reprimand.
"Yes, Captain," Kira replied before he thought.
But after he thought he had to admit that his commander was - as usual - right. He decided to put himself together and cease to faint - three times the same evening was truly pathetic. Nothing what Captain Ichimaru would say wouldn't surprise him, right? Be a man, Kira Izuru, he told himself.
"Perhaps yer hungry?" asked Gin Ichimaru in a mischievous tone. "I bet ya were sittin' there without a lunch... Everyone would faint."
"Yes, Captain," Kira replied automatically and then he realized he should stop playing a half-wit. "I mean, no, Captain..."
He had to do something before the situation would take a turn for the worse. Think, Kira Izuru. Think what you can... what you should do in this situation.
"Tha's good," said Gin.
Kira felt the warm breath on his ear again, then the slender fingers brushing aside the hair on his temple. Think, think, think... Work out a plan. You aren't as inexperienced, are you? Just start and it will go... somehow.
Probably.
"But I'd like ya not to lay like a log, it's no differen' from the before," Gin went on with an almost scenic sigh. "I take no pleasure in violatin' innocent virgins," he added in undertone.
"I am not-"
"Yer innocent" said Gin with an absolute confidence, taking the strand of Kira's hair to his lips. "And ya will remain."
Kira turned his head and looked into his Captain's face, so close to his own. Then, only then, he got stroke by the perfect calmness of the situation. The evening was calm, it covered them both like a soft blanket. Gin Ichimaru was calm, too, even though - Kira realized - he could do with him anything he'd like to. But the most amazing was his own calmness, so he wanted to spare a moment and think it over.
The anxiety was in his nature. His personality was dominated by concern and uncertainty - he always worried about something and he was never sure of anything. He knew that well and he tried to accept it, with various results, though. Captain Ichimaru seemed to intensify his anxiety, seemed to induce his uncertainty, and seemed to disturb his composure. Kira knew, though, that somewhere deep below all those sensations, there was a pulsating calmness that came from that very presence of Gin Ichimaru. The closer Kira was to his Captain, the stronger he felt this particular influence of him - if only he let himself feel it.
Now he was closer than ever. He felt the heat Gin Ichimaru's body radiated with. He felt the soft hair that tickled his cheek. He felt the fingers gently moving over his neck. And he was calmer than ever. His heart beat steadily, his breath was even. He was calm. Calm...
"Don' think so much or ya'll become a thinker," Gin Ichimaru said with even wider smile.
Could he be more?
"Yes, Captain."
Temptation was too strong. He lifted his hands.
"I beg your pardon, Captain..."
He was ready to pay any price. He embraced those lean shoulders.
"President Iba rather hastily disposed of my services..."
With joy. He slipped his fingers into that soft hair.
"And... I believe Hisagi-san is much more experienced..."
And gladly. He lifted his head and kissed the smile.
"So please tell me," he whispered with complete sincerity. "Show me..." he added softer. "Please..."
He closed his eyes and drew near Gin Ichimaru. He was embraced by the strong arms, the thin lips touched his eyelids.
"Come with me," Captain Ichimaru said so softly that the moonlight seemed to sing aloud. "...Izuru."
Kira shivered, feeling the warmth filling him. The way Gin Ichimaru spoke his name... Kira never could resist it. Now he was eager to surrender.
"Izuru," Gin repeated and smiled mischievously.
Kira moaned as the hair on his neck raised and his skin tensed... He pressed himself against the man and felt tight muscles under the shihakushō.
"Izuru," Gin said for the third time, bending down and silencing him.
And when Kira was staying in the kiss that seemed like a calm perfection itself, he thought he didn't mind Vice-Captain Iba's ideas any more.
Day 2
"Captain...?"
"Mmm?"
"Do you think... no-one wonders... where we are?"
"I'm on holiday, ya have a special mission, our Third Seat is in command of the division."
Kira was enraptured by the genial simplicity of this sentence. He was even more enraptured by its conviction - it almost totally salved his conscience.
Day 3
"Where are we anyway?"
"Kuchiki Manor, visitor's wing."
"!"
"Lie down. No-one ever visits them."
"But someone can hear..." said Kira faintly, nestling down again.
"There are some therapist in Seireitei, if the Captain of the Sixth Division would feel like tellin' about it..."
Day 4, 5, 6
"Captain... you took the cover..."
"Ya say ya need to get warm?"
"Izuru, it's my big toe."
"I know, but it's closer."
"Izuru, ya got spoiled. I hardly recognize ya."
"..."
"Yer adorable when ya blush. And still innocent."
Day 7
"Everythin' good comes to an end," Gin started.
"Mmm," Kira replied with a nose on his chest.
"I don't wan' to come back," Gin said in a rather showy tone.
"Mmm," Kira agreed.
"I'm under impression I talk to myself."
"Oh," Kira looked at him.
Gin hugged him.
"I am a Gotei 13 captain," he pointed. "I have my duties," he added like he wanted to ensure something.
Kira sagged.
"I have my rights," Gin went on. "I have my demands," he summed up.
Kira looked at him with a hope. Gin frowned.
"Budget of the Third Division will afford one more week of my holiday and yer special mission, dontcha think? The Third Seat will only benefit from the additional experience," he said with authority.
Kira felt like he suddenly stood in the full sun. He laughed.
When falling asleep he heard Captain spoke in low tone that sound almost like a conspiracy:
"Don' say a word to Vice-Captain Iba, 'kay?"
He nodded. He would agree to anything.
"He charged me fer ya twice as much as fer Hisagi..."