I had this idea and it wouldn't leave until I had written it. So here it is!
Disclaimer - I don't own Harry Potter
Enjoy!
It was just after midnight when Remus stumbled down into the kitchen of Grimmauld Place in search for a glass of water. Upon opening the door, he was shocked instead to find a congregation of order members; Sirius, looking slightly bored; Bill Weasley, looking tired with an arm around Fleur Delacour; Fred and George Weasley, who were muttering to themselves and grinning and Nymphadora Tonks, who was stood beside her cousin, looking vacant. They were all stood in a sort of circle, talking to each other in hushed voices at the far side of the kitchen.
"Moony!" Sirius cried, ushering the startled Remus out of the doorway and promptly closing the door. The order members jumped apart at the sudden outburst and Remus smiled embarrassedly as all eyes turned to him.
"Hate to wake Molly." Sirius snickered, before pulling his wand from his jacket pocket and casting a silencing charm on the old door.
Remus was stood before the semi-circle of now silent order members, with no idea what to say. If he'd know that such an extent group had been in the kitchen, he certainly would have stayed in his room, rather than venture down.
"What's going on down here then?" asked Remus awkwardly, suddenly aware that he was in his brown and blue stripy pyjamas whilst the others were all fully clothed in jeans and jackets.
Bill was the first to speak, "We just got back from a mission Dumbledore set us, Remus. We just got in a few minutes ago." he rubbed his temples wearily, nodding in acknowledgement at Tonks and Fleur.
Remus nodded, looking concernedly at Tonks, who looked thoughtful and was considerably less lively as she usually was, though her hair was its usual bright pink. He now noticed that the trio did in fact look worn, each had dark circles under their eyes and wore a similar expression of fatigue. He then looked at the twins, whose bright expressions and wide eyes contrasted sharply with the other members.
"We heard them arrive," they said in unison, "I'm surprised the old hag in the hallway, no offence, Sirius, didn't wake up."
"None taken." Snickered Sirius, who, Remus noted, looked positively ecstatic at the company he had been deprived of for months.
"Well, since we're here we may as well make the most of the good company and ample supply of firewhiskey in this very room!" Sirius exclaimed merrily, making his way to a cupboard where he pulled out two large bottles of firewhiskey.
They watched him cautiously and exchanged hesitant glances, before Fred and George sat down at the table prompting Tonks, Bill and Fleur to do the same. It was blatantly obvious that the latter three wanted nothing more than to go to bed and sleep for days, but all stayed in respect for Sirius, who hadn't had such company for too long. Remus, however, stayed standing but accepted his firewhiskey with the rest without hesitation.
And it only occurred to him after he'd had his third glass, that Sirius had most definitely spiked the firewhiskey. With what, he did not want to know. Feeling more than a little bit tipsy had meant that Remus had allowed Sirius to persuade him to join the game of spin the bottle that was just being set up.
"Wait, wait. What is this game?"
"It's called spin the bottle, Remus. It's a muggle game that teenagers like to play in their spare time… I myself am quite partial to a round or two." Sirius slurred slightly as he sat between Fred and Tonks.
"Hmm, I don't believe I've ever heard of it. What are the rules?" said Remus cautiously, as he took a seat between George and Bill Weasley.
"Well, it's like this, there's a bottle in the centre of the circle," George said, pointing to the empty firewhiskey bottle lying on its side, "and you spin it, and…" he cut off, looking uncharacteristically awkward and Fred continued, "Whoever it lands on gets a… smooch."
"A what?" Remus glanced around the table uncertainly, eyes stopping on the pink-haired witch that sat directly opposite him just a moment longer than the rest. She looked bemused at his ignorance to the game and her bright eyes glinted with mischief; he had never noticed a similarity to Sirius before that moment.
"A smooch!" the twins replied cheerfully, in perfect unison.
"Merlin, Moony!" Sirius leant over the table and planted a firm kiss against Remus' cheek, "It's not difficult!" The table roared with laughter as a blush rose on the werewolf's cheeks and he seemed to sober up immediately mumbling,
"Thanks for that, Padfoot."
"It is muggle custom for the kiss to be on the lips, of course." Sirius replied, winking at Tonks who looked away with a look of excitement and anticipation.
"I see, I'm first then?" he acknowledged, raising an eyebrow as the others giggled and nodded. Leaning over the centre of the circle, he spun the bottle as instructed, before promptly looking away with dread. Taking the opportunity as the bottle slowed to a halt, Sirius bumped it slightly so that it was pointing directly at Tonks when Remus had averted his eyes.
Tonks went quite still when she saw the bottle pointing confidently at her, and she instantly began to regret Sirius having invited Remus to play with them; she knew how she felt about him and that he wouldn't allow himself to feel the same.
She was about the protest when Remus wordlessly leant over the table to her, instigating her to do the same.
Her hands held his arms, and her lips met his cautiously at first. He wasn't sure if her lips were even touching his when he felt a surge of electricity pulse through him. His heart began to race, his palms were clammy and his mind scanned over the hundred reasons why he should pull away before he did something he'd regret later.
But he did not pull away and instead pressed her closer to him, as close as the damn table would allow, caressing her lips with his own. He felt himself ascend into another world – a world of intense bliss, where he was not a werewolf unworthy of the love of the woman in his arms. The surroundings disappeared, and all he could feel was Nymphadora's touch, her lips on his, her hand in his hair. It was all he could do to keep from groaning out loud.
After a moment, he pulled away breathlessly, slightly in shock over what had just occurred. Sirius, the Weasleys and the rest sat with their mouths hanging open, trying to process the sight they'd just witnessed. Opposite Remus, Nymphadora looked completely shell-shocked.
The silence lasted many minutes, the only sound uttered by any of the party was jagged breaths as Remus and Tonks tried to compose themselves.
It was Remus who broke the silence, "Well… did I win?" and he certainly hoped so; the thought of kissing anyone but Nymphadora or anyone kissing her was near painful.
Then he realised that he didn't want to kiss anyone else ever again.
Sirius just nodded wordlessly, looking completely shocked and yet quite impressed, and Remus quickly excused himself from the table, catching glances of the other occupants pleased faces. He left the room with haste, shock and confusion coursing through him, but one thing was painfully certain, the same piece of undeniable information that had been plaguing his dreams for the last six months; he was madly in love with Nymphadora Tonks.
But that wasn't allowed; he wouldn't burden her with his love. He was too poor, too dangerous, and too old for someone as lovely and perfect as Nymphadora. She would be much better off someone young and whole, who was able to provide for her and love her as much as she deserved. Someone who could give her a family and could make her happy, not make her an outcast.
He didn't hear the frantic footsteps running toward him from behind. It was only when she had tripped over her old foe the umbrella stand and latched herself around his broad back to try and stop herself from the hitting the floor that Remus realised Tonks had followed him, looking flustered.
He gently held her arms and turned to face her, helping her regain balance as he did so. He suddenly felt extremely awkward; what does one say to the person whom they love but cannot have?
"Nymphadora, listen," he began, dropping his gaze to the floor, though it was too dark to be able to make out anything but the outlines of her clothing, but allowing his hands to enjoy the feel of her in them for a moment longer.
"No, Remus, you listen." She held up a hand to silence any protests he had been about to say, "I know what you're going to say, I'm too old, too poor, too dangerous!" she mimicked his voice with an unconcealed hint of frustration, "and I'm telling you, for the thousandth time, I don't care. I just don't care! I love you, Remus, time of the month and all! And I'm pretty convinced you feel the same." He winced at the determination in her voice, the truth in her words.
"I d-"she cut him off again, seizing a handful of his pyjama shirt and pulling him closer to her so she could see clearly into his eyes.
"But if you don't, or you're not willing to show you do, then I'll never mention it again. Ever, if that's what you really want."
He knew what he had to do; she had given him the perfect opportunity to refuse her once and for all! So why had his mouth suddenly gone dry, as though full of sand? Why was the beating of his heart against his ribcage the only thing he could hear? Why were the azure eyes of the woman in his arms the only thing he could see, and the tears within them causing him so much pain?
Why was his overpowering love for her the only thing he felt?
Without a second's hesitation, he captured her lips with his own. Their second kiss was different to the first; hungry and passionate and full of unspoken emotion and longing.
He'd denied himself happiness long enough.
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