::Hehe…boy is this gonna be fun. We start our slightly AU tale at a meeting of the leaders of Konoha village. Forget what you've read or seen after the teams were assigned for genin, this is MY story. Of course, I don't own the characters or setting… But I bet you already knew that::
"—as surely as I am the Hokage," the third of that title replied. The stunned audience was still having problems digesting this plan. Everyone agreed that something had to be done, but the solution…
Hyuuga Hiashi, the head of his clan, spoke first. "Hokage-sama, I won't say I can understand your reasons for this decision, but I think the last place Naruto should end up is as a member of the Uchiha clan." Several people in the room relaxed as their concerns were voiced. The clan leader's pale eyes were narrow slits and his face was grim. "Sasuke would never consent to having the town's most hated member living under his roof as family. His pride is too great, and so is Naruto's."
The Hokage sniffed and grunted. "Well, what do you say we should do? Naruto has become too much of a handful for the community as he is now, an independent. Do we hire parents for him?"
Hiashi looked down at the mat floor. That is absurd. The boy is strong, determined, but has no self-restraint or discipline. It is as the Hokage said, the boy must be adopted into another clan or he will surely grow beyond our control. Looking back up he said, "Perhaps find a larger clan, one that could provide the guidance the boy needs. Instead of handing him to a peer to manage, impose upon a strong clan with the means to raise the boy so he may become a strong ninja instead of a loud fool."
The Hokage's face was carefully blank. Hiashi couldn't make heads or tails of the man, one reason why he respected him. At length, the Hokage said, "Then I have decided what course this will take. Given your interest and undoubted future involvement with this issue, I would like to speak with you in private. This meeting is concluded."
The heads of the various clans in Konoha stood and filed out. Usually they would have waited for Hiashi to leave first, but the man stayed behind. Once the sliding door closed, the Hokage took out a scroll and ink. He set them in front of Hiashi. "This is the document written up for this case. Because of the nature of this I left a few space blank, and it's a good thing I did.
"Naruto should do well under this family's guidance…" He opened the scroll and brought his pen down upon the paper.
Hiashi's eyes narrowed. So, he's seating that family with the problem…
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Uzumaki Naruto, who would soon be addressed by a different name, slammed his fist into the rock face one more time before falling back to pant in the grass. His orange jacket hung from a branch nearby and his white t-shirt was soaked with sweat. Eventually he got to his feet and wandered over to a nearby stream. Removing his shirt, well-toned muscles built to subtle perfection gleamed in the sunlight that entered this little clearing. He rinsed it in the stream and squeezed it out, lying it on a rock as he untied his forehead protector and rinsed it off as well. He would have to replace the cloth again soon, such extreme exercise and constant sweating was discoloring the cloth. It didn't help that he had to constantly wash it to keep it from stinking.
With a sigh he stretched and looked up at the rock formation he'd been practicing his taijutsu on. The face of the Fourth Hokage was right above him. People avoided the cliffs like holy ground, making it the perfect location for private training. Naruto rubbed a hand against the stone. The dent was slightly deeper today. He grinned.
The road to chuunin had been hard, and the one to jounin was proving to be a struggle as well. Despite promptings from his secret sensei, Jiraiya, Naruto refused to tap the Ninetail's chakra during the tests. This had knocked him out his first attempt at the chuunin exam, and it was then that he had met Jiraiya and trained with him. Passing on his second try, he had expected to be given more and better missions. No. Such. Luck.
In his two years as a chuunin he had gone on only a handful of missions with a team. A majority of his assignments were C rank and boring to the extreme. While Sasuke got pushed to his limits on B and A rank missions, Naruto had been forced to seek his own trials. Despite all this, he still had a crush on sweet Sakura-chan (who made chuunin with him, but usually got the dangerous spying missions on account of her intelligence), still loved ramen, and was as loud and obnoxious as any teen could be.
"Maybe I should try painting 'I love H Sakura' on the geezer's forehead up there…" he mused. Then shaking his head he went back to the rock and put his shirt back on. It was slightly damp, but much better than the sticky-sweaty damp from earlier. The air was relatively cool for late spring, but he worked up a sweat no matter what the season. To avoid having his style constantly copied by Sasuke he had turned to taijutsu as his area of expertise.
Even Gai, the best ninja at taijutsu in Konoha and probably the world, had to admit Naruto was doing well. He could unlock the gates and not suffer as much as any other taijutsu specialist because of the Ninetail's habit of constantly healing him. Looking around, though he decided it was late enough that he should head back to his apartment and think about dinner.
Oh what a surprise awaited there.
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Haruno Sakura quietly slipped off her bed and laid her ear against the floor. Her father had just returned from the Hokage's meeting and didn't sound pleased. I wonder what's going on…
She could barely make out the voice of her mother as she said, "…Naruto is going to be the end of us." Sakura frowned. While her inner self completely agreed (for he was constantly interrupting her moments with Sasuke-kun) she didn't think he would harm someone in any serious way unless thoroughly provoked. In all of his reports there hadn't been a single death, and sometimes she could tell he had gone through quite a lot of trouble not to kill.
Her father was not so hard to hear. "I'm not sure, he can take care of the boy. If anyone can stop his childish antics it's him."
"…still think it's…much to ask…under the same roof." Her mother's voice was dropping, signifying that she wasn't going to object anymore.
A chair scraped against the kitchen floor. "He's a good teacher, he'll raise him right."
Sakura leapt to her feet, eyes wide. They were going to have Kakashi adopt Naruto?! Her mind started going through all of the horrible things the scarecrow would teach the boy. Naruto has already been caught in a couple compromising positions at the hot springs! Letting Kakashi raise him will turn him into a full-blown pervert!! That's even worse!!! She opened her window and jumped from her windows to the roof. I've got to tell Ino!
The rest of this you can guess at. Once Ino knew, word spread fast. By sunset, all of Konoha was talking about it. The Hokage and Kakashi were sitting in his office later that evening in companionable silence. "How do we tell him?" The Hokage said aloud, not really asking Kakashi, but more along the lines of saying what he was thinking to break the ice.
Kakashi looked at the Hokage with his usual half-asleep expression. "I suspect he'll be asking us. Any minute now he'll be finishing his dinner at his favorite ramen stand, hearing the gossip. Then he'll—
"Old Man Hokage!!" The outer doors slammed open. Kakashi and the Hokage sighed and didn't have long to wait until the office door opened and let in the human fusion reactor known as Naruto. He spotted Kakashi and froze, his blue eyes going wide. "Is it true, then?"
The Hokage remained silent and Kakashi stood up. Placing a hand on Naruto's shoulder he turned him towards the door as he said, "Come on, let me take you home… Hyuuga Naruto."
::Sorry that it's sooo short, but I just had to stop it there! . The rest will be longer, I swear. I haven't picked pairings yet, but I definitely have some idea of how I want things to end up. I was thinking about bringing Temari, Gaara, and Kankuro in… Feel free to ask for wacky couples, I enjoy fresh ideas. Until next time!::