Hey guys, this is Lola! Long time, no see! So this is pretty spoilery if you're not caught up on Season 14 so beware of that! This fic is sort of angst-y and stars Sam in it. I hope you guys like this little one-shot, feel free to review and to give feed-back! Lots of love! -Lola

Sam stood with his hands in his pockets looking over three headstones. His lanky figure seemed to be hunched over from the weight of the world. It had been a long few months. No, it had been a long few years. Now, those years were closing in on him, now it was all going to finally be finished and he didn't know what to do. He didn't know how it was supposed to end, but he didn't think it would be like this.

It had snowed the night before in his hometown of Lawrence, Kansas. There were one-two inches of snow on the ground in the graveyard and it crunched under Sam's boots. The air was harsh and mean. It bit at Sam's hands and lips with unrequited cruelty, but it was a strange comfort to him. It gave him an excuse to put his hands inside Dean's heavy jacket because he had forgotten his gloves at his childhood home.

He looked up to the grey sky, it was surely going to snow even more. Kansas was going through a harsh winter, but Sam was thankful for it. It gave him an excuse to stay inside. It gave him an excuse to board up the windows of his childhood home and to not answer the phone. It gave him an excuse not to look for a new hunt that would just lead him to even more cases. What Sam Winchester had learned about hunting is that just taking one more case would never be just taking one more case. Once you put down the knife, you have to throw it away or otherwise, you will never stop carving.

Sam shivered in the cold as he looked down at the three gravestones. There were more than just three in the cemetery but, these were the three he visited the most. He had picked the three plots right next to each other because he wanted to be able to visit all three of them at the same time. He put them in the middle of the cemetery so he wouldn't chicken out every time he drove up. He also didn't want to have to walk around to find them. It was no use to him to wander around and look at the random peoples' gravestones who were buried around the three he wanted to see. He didn't want to think about the rotting flesh that laid below the earth, or how they could turn into ghosts if they weren't cremated or buried just right. It was just depressing to Sam, he would honestly like to not think at all, but that wasn't an option.

Sam stooped down and ran his hands over the names. He first started with JACK KLINE-WINCHESTER. He traced the J all the way to the R in a loving fashion. He would never forgive Jack for what he did to his mother. He would never forgive Jack for the death and destruction he brought with him. He would never forgive Jack for making him a liar. But he would never stop loving Jack. Just as he couldn't stop loving John even though he made his life miserable as a kid. Bobby had told his family was supposed to make your life miserable, and he knew he was right. They wouldn't be family if they didn't make you want to pull out your hair. He smiled at the memory of innocence in Jack's face, even though it had died such a long time ago.

The next name he traced was CASTIEL. He started with the C and finished with the L just as he had done Jack's before putting his right hand back into Dean's jacket. He thought of Castiel when he first met him, and couldn't help the pained chuckle that escaped his lips. Cass had been so uptight. He had been so ridged and...robotic, but slowly he came out of that. Slowly, he became something more. He began to love humanity, he began to want to do something more than just follow orders. In the end, Cass and Sam became close but it wasn't until the end that Cass would become like another brother to Sam.

Finally, Sam's right hand trembled as it came out of the coat pocket. He reached over began to trace the D all the way to the W. DEAN WINCHESTER, he spelled out as tears pricked behind his eyes. The reality had still not sunk in even after weeks of coming here day after day. After hours upon hours of spending time reading the gravestone, Sam refused to accept the truth. He refused to accept his brother was gone, because Sam couldn't do it without his brother. He was barely functioning in denial of the fact Dean was dead.

He couldn't eat, he couldn't sleep, because he was waiting for Dean to come home. He was waiting to make fun of Dean for eating artery-clogging bacon cheeseburgers and to listen to the same songs over and over again. He was waiting for Dean to leave his Busty Asian Beauties magazines lazily thrown around and having to clean up after him. Sam was waiting for Dean to come in and complain that he was bored and he needed something to do. Sam was waiting to go look at the stars while sharing a beer, or Dean forcing him to wax his car. He was waiting for Dean to come back and be his brother.

Sam heard a whooshing sound behind him, and he stood up and turned from where he was originally sitting and staring at the tombstone. In front of him was Nick, who had been dead but wasn't anymore. The Empty had gotten bored of Lucifer and decided to spit him back out and put him into Nick's body. The Empty was hoping for another apocalypse which it got, but Lucifer won. Lucifer took the world and everything Sam loved in it and destroyed it.

"Not doing so well, are we Sammy?" Lucifer mocked as he took a step towards Sam in the snow.

Sam closed his eyes as if hoping this was all just in his head, but he knew it wasn't. He knew this was a reality, and there was nothing he could do about it. Lucifer had been making these visits at least once a week to torture Sam. Sam didn't want to admit it, but it was working. Sam hated being alive. He hated living without Dean, Jack, Cas, Mom, and everyone else he had ever lost. Sam hated being alone.

"Did you see the news yesterday?" Lucifer asked with a smirk as Sam opened his eyes. "Two thousand people died from a plague in Paris, how nice is that?" Lucifer said happily.

Sam knew Lucifer was waiting for him to say something, but he knew not to. If he didn't say anything, Lucifer would eventually get bored and leave him alone.

"Oh come on, Sam," Lucifer whined and stomped his foot a little. "Talk to me, amigo! We used to have so many stimulating conversations. Now, now you just stand there." Lucifer complained in annoyance.

Sam simply turned away from Lucifer looking back to his brother's grave. But then, something Lucifer said caught his attention. "I could let you see your brother," Lucifer said, and the devil smirked as he saw Sam pause in his usual game. "Not just the imaginative version, but the real thing. You could be with him, you would like that, wouldn't you Sammy?"

Sam hadn't eaten in so many days and hadn't slept in longer. All he understood were brother and real, which made him nod his head. He decided he didn't care if Lucifer was lying to him, all he wanted to do was go and be with Dean. He hated this world without him.

"Good," Lucifer said soothingly as Sam turned around. Lucifer reached out and put a gentle hand on Sam's shoulder. "All you've got to do is say yes for me, okay? So go on," Lucifer said in a soft voice as if he would use it on a baby. "Say yes."

Now, Sam knew this was a trick. Ever since Lucifer came back he was obsessed with making Sam his vessel. It was almost like someone pushed the reset button on him which made him revert back to his original purpose: to rise and destroy the world. To do that fully, he needed Sam. For months, for years, Sam had told him no. Sam had fought him tooth and nail, but he was tired. Sam Winchester was so tired and felt as if he had nothing left to fight for. He had no one left.

Sam Winchester never thought it would end like this, but at the same time, deep down, he knew it would end like this. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, soon he would be with Dean. Soon he would be able to look at the stars and share beers and argue that Superman was better than Batman. Soon it would all be over.

"Yes."