This
story includes illegal activity such as tagging (spray-painting sides
of buildings illegally), drug addictions, obstructing a police
officer and some other things. There's also activity that could, to
put it mildly, be considered "questionable" by law
enforcement: a gay relationship between a police officer and a
Special Agent In Charge (FBI agent of high standing. Just for
clarification, every agent who goes into the FBI is a Special Agent,
but there are different ranks of Special Agents). If an FBI agent is
found to be gay, s/he is fired. If you don't believe me, please read
A Special Agent: Gay and Inside the FBI by Lou Buttino and Frank
Buttino. If a police officer is found to be gay s/he is sometimes
demoted but almost always treated of lower status.
I hate Britney
Spears but her song "Everytime" is mentioned in the story
because it fits. I like Enrique Iglesias and his song "Ring My
Bells" fits certain parts of the story. I do not own the rights
to either song and make no money off of mentioning them. LiveJournal
is mentioned in this chapter and other chapters. I DO NOT OWN
LIVEJOURNAL and do not make any money off of mentioning it. I do not
own the book Graffiti Women and do not make any money from mentioning
it.
Don't sue me, I'm a college student financially dependant on
someone else. I own nothing except the plot idea.
To Protect
and To Serve
-Sasuke-
The spray can exploded when he was in the
middle of his name. The pain was unbearable. A quarter of his head
has been blown off. He remembered as they lifted him into the
ambulance, always reading the warning on aerosol cans--CAUTION.
CONTENTS UNDER PRESSURE. DO NOT PUNCTURE OR INCINERATE and to keep
them at certain temperatures. He had always wondered, dreaded what
would happen in the can were placed near heat, fire or a sharp
object. Now he knew.
I no longer use spray cans because of that
story. I no longer use street buildings as my canvas in the middle of
the night because of what happened to this man. I don't even know
him. His name was Zabuza or something. Wanted by the cops for AWD,
220 and tagging. He died in the ambulance. The thought that it could
have been me made me give up street art. I draw it on blank sheets of
paper sometimes, and then color my designs and put them on my walls
in the condo. My fascination with street art or graffiti, for I used
to do both, began when I was what, fourteen. I started tagging when I
was nineteen and stopped after hearing of Zabuza's death three months
later. I was faced with my own mortality when I heard it, that's
all.
I miss the adrenaline rush. I miss running at night, catching
a spot and hearing the hiss of my paint. I miss admiring my work the
next day. There was a constant anticipation of running into the
police, or spraying over a gang's spot, or so many other things. I
didn't want any of that to happen, so I anticipated it. I prepared
myself for it. All that has been gone for years. Now, there's
nothing. Don't become a graffiti artist, anyone. It's too risky.
How
boring. I shut the book and log onto LiveJournal. Breakups, tattoos
of people's names, acceptances into schools, the usual.
-I need to
get my mind off this. Anybody wanna fuck?-
Three comments.
-Ooh,
you touch my tra-la-la.-
-Yes, Chouji, but I'm not your
type.-
-Won't Kiba be offended?-
-Since when are Kiba and
Chouji fucking?- I type, then click 'post comment.' I'll have to
return the book to the library tomorrow. I much prefer "Graffiti
Women." It gives me ideas and educates me every time I read it.
I've been thinking of switching to regular, not spray, paint. I've
been tagging ever since I was nineteen and a half, and began drawing
my designs on paper years before. I took a silver aerosol can to
spray dark blue, thin paint onto a parking garage's wall. It's
relaxing, very creative and artistic. I do it on my nights off, after
visiting my dealer. The crystal meth helps lower my inhibitions. It
makes me forget who I am, the fact that this is illegal, and I can
just...go away for awhile. When the spray can is in my left hand,
when darkness is the sky's cloak, when my veins are dancing with
meth, I forget that my right hand is my dominant shooting hand and
the promise I made when the bronze hunk of metal was fastened to my
uniform, over my left breast, over my heart.
"I promise to
serve and to protect my community."
My name is Sasuke. I
recently made detective for Seattle's sex crimes unit, and that's all
I'll ever tell you. I can't fuck up my chances. If they know what and
who I do in my personal life, I'm finished. Gay cops are not treated
nicely. I'm single, I don't use pornography and I never, ever talk
about my personal life at work. Regardless, somebody could find out.
Nobody in my department, not even my captain, would care. Other, more
powerful people would. I'm not going to post an LJ entry tonight.
There is nothing for me except my spray cans, Sharpies and memories
of old boyfriends. There's so much misery in the world, but sometimes
I think it's all here in Seattle. The things I see in my
nine-to-five, five-days-a-week job, not including the overtime that
is so common, nobody needs those images, that reality in their head.
I face it every day. It's my duty to protect and to serve my
community. I've wanted to work in law enforcement ever since I was
sixteen. But I still tag at night. The first time I did it was to
celebrate my entry into the force. It's illegal, but I still do meth
and tag at night.
