You Found Me

Derek hadn't seen Spencer in a few days, and was beginning to get very concerned. No one seemed to have any idea where the genius had gone; he told JJ he was going to visit his mom in Las Vegas, he told Garcia that he was going to a Dr Who convention in San Francisco. Derek had left him close to a dozen voicemails and still no answer. He blew off his last appointment and drove to the younger agent's apartment barely under the speed limit.

He felt the first niggling of guilt starting in the back off his head as he was stalled at a traffic light. Spencer had come to him a little while ago and expressed that he thought he might have feelings for someone they worked with, but didn't want to jeopardize the friendship he had with them. Derek knew that he must be talking about Seaver and was ashamed to admit that it had gotten to him.

In response he had gone a bit of a bender; boys, girls, whoever was willing to come home with him. Not his proudest moment. On top of that though, Spencer had left him dozens of messages, emails, memos through work all asking to talk, if he was ok. Derek had ignored all of them. Then they started getting more desperate, asking what he had done wrong, if Derek wanted to talk to him, that he was there any time. He knew how Spencer felt about abandonment, and also that he considered Derek his best friend. Now he was worried he had driven the genius to do something stupid.

Derek pulled into the underground garage and stopped to call up to the apartment. The phone just rang and rang; Spencer had unhooked the answering machine. Well, at least I know he's been home since the last twenty calls thought Derrick. He fished Spencer's key out of his glove box and started up the stairs. He knocked twice before le let himself in. He considered waiting to see if Spencer answered, but he figured his avoidance of his calls was pretty telling.

His concern was not lessened when he found the Doctor's living room in shambles, books and papers on the floor and a chair overturned. He was slightly comforted by the fact that it didn't actually look much worse than it usually did. He heard the shower going down the hall.

"Spencer? Hey kid, you here?"

When Derek didn't get an answer he started down the hall. The feeling of unease returned when he realized that the door to the bathroom was half open. Having shared many a hotel room with the good doctor, Derek knew he always closed and locked the door when he showered (one too many bad experiences in high school). His hand instinctively went for his gun as he slowly pushed the door the rest of the way open.

"Spencer?"

The young genius was half-sprawled on the bathroom floor, his torso slumped over the ledge of the bathtub. His belt was wrapped around his upper arm and the syringe was still sticking out of the fold in his elbow. As Derek tried to step towards his friend he hit something with his foot. A diloted vial was lying on the floor beside the doctor. Derek bent down and picked it up; it was almost empty. Derek shook his head. Kid must have tried to take his old dosage.

Derek undid the tourniquet and pulled the needle out as gently as he could. He slapped Spencer hard across his face and when he didn't get a response he pulled him into the already running shower. He held him under the freezing spray until he couldn't feel his hands anymore and when that had no effect he slapped him again. Spencer flopped in his grip like a marionette whose strings had been cut. Derek started panicking. He realized that he hadn't even bothered to check the other man's pulse, check how long he had been like that.

Derek pulled Spencer back out of the shower, laying him down gently on the mat. He grabbed a towel off the rack and arranged it under Spencer's head. He bent to listen to the doctor's chest; he couldn't hear anything. He yanked his phone out of his sopping jeans, praying it still worked. He speed-dialed Garcia, holding his breath.

"It's ok Kid, just hold on. Baby Girl? Yeah, listen, this is important! Pay attention. I need you to call me a bus to Reid's address ok? But stay on the line for me, I might need you."

Derek put the phone down next to Spencer's head and bent his ear to the other man's chest. There was a weak, thready pulse and he wasn't breathing. Derek started to give him mouth to mouth, frantically counting compressions. After what seemed like an eternity Spencer gave a breathy cough, then another stronger one. Soon Derek was supporting his friend as he coughed and retched. The doctor collapsed again and Derek pulled him into his lap while they waited for the ambulance.

"Where were you?" Spencer rasped weakly as Derek stroked his hair.

"What do you mean kid?" Derek wiped away a tear quickly. He really had been scared that he had lost his best friend.

"I've been…" Spencer gasped for breath. "I've been waiting for a very long time. Waiting for you to be done with them."

"Who? Spencer, you're delirious."

"I have feelings…"

"For Seaver, yeah. You'll get a chance to tell her buddy don't worry."

"You're a moron!" Spencer reached up and interlaced his fingers with Derek's.

"It's you…" the genius said softly, laying his head against his friend's chest. "It's always been you."