[VIOLA]
I sit there, listening to the mess of memories, the jumble of thoughts, that is Todd's Noise. Every now and then, his noise will get that little bit louder, and give me that little bit more hope that maybe he's going to wake up soon.
But he never does. It's been five months now and I've come to realise -
And I don't want to realise -
But I know it must be true -
(Because why wouldn't he have woken up by now?)
I know it must be true.
He isn't going to.
He isn't going to wake up, he's never going to, he's gone for good, and I dread the day that I'm going to come and I'm going to sit down and his Noise will have stopped.
I don't want that day to come.
So I'm going to make sure it never does. At least, not to me.
[TODD]
She has Noise now.
The voice, the voice that talks to me, that tells me that everything's going to be okay, that I'm going to wake up, even tho I know it ain't true, even tho I know even she don't believe it. She has Noise.
But it ain't like men's Noise, it's cleaner, it's tidier, but it's clumsy as well, because she's still getting the hang of it, she's still learning how to use and control it.
It was Ben's idea. If the men could stop having Noise, then surely the women could start. Not all of the women liked that idea; in fact, most of them didn't. And even she didn't, the girl who talks to me, but she started learning how to use it anyway so that she could communicate to me the things that she don't want to - or can't - say.
And I know that the Noise, and the voice that speaks to me, I know it's Viola. I don't know who Viola is; I remember her, and I remember that I love her, love her more than anything, but I don't know who she is. But that's fine with me, cuz I know she loves me and I love her, and that's all I need, ain't it?
[VIOLA]
I'm going to do it, after I say goodbye to Lee, who loves me even though he knows I will never love him back, but still loves me regardless; and Wilf, who's the bravest man I ever knew; and Bradley, who's become a new father to me.
And, of course, Todd.
A tear falls from my eye, but I brush it away, knowing Todd wouldn't want me to cry.
[TODD]
I listen to her Noise. I want to know what's going on, I want to know how she's feeling, what she's thinking about.
I hear a sudden, urgent spike in her noise. She tries to push it back down again, like she don't want me to hear, but like I said, she's new to Noise, she don't know how to control it as well as most people, so once she's thought it, she can't stop thinking it, and I hear it, clear as day.
She's going to -
She's going to -
(No, Viola, you ain't, you ain't gonna, are yer?)-
But I can hear it, it's in her Noise, and she ain't even trying to hide it any more, she's let it go, like she can't be bothered keeping it from me any more.
I can hear it.
She's going to kill herself.
But she can't. She's gotta keep living, she's gotta, because what about Lee and Wilf and Bradley and the new settlers and Mistress Lawson, people who care about her, people who'd miss her, people who'd mourn her and grieve for her?
She can't, she just can't.
I want to scream, but I can't, and I want to tell her not to, but I can't, and I hate this, I hate being powerless, I hate hearing everything but not being able to do nothing about it.
And I know, I know that if I wake up she won't do it.
I need to wake up.
I don't believe in God, because of what Aaron did to us and to Manchee, my brilliant dog, and because all the terrible things that have happened to us in churches. But still, I pray, and I think that if there is a God up there, please let Him hear me.
Let Him hear me.
Let Him hear me.
And it's weird, because it's like I'm underwater, I've been underwater this whole time, and I'm still underwater but I'm getting closer to the surface, I'm getting closer.
Let Him hear me.
Viola?
Viola.
I'm coming for you.
[VIOLA]
His eyes blink open.
My heart stops. Time slows down. I can't speak, can't think of the words, and even my Noise gets quieter because what is there to think?
I blink. When I open my eyes again, though, Todd's still awake. He's still awake.
He's awake.
And before I know it, before I can even think, I'm wrapping my arms around him, and he's smiling that crooked smile of his, and my tears are falling freely, but this time they're tears of joy, because he's awake, holy shit he's awake -
And there are tears in his eyes too, and he opens his mouth, and though his voice is hoarse and raspy and weak he says to me -
"Don't leave me alone, you hear? Don't leave me."
