Disclaimer: Not mine nor will it ever be and they belong to the BigWigs at
WB.
Just something that I started writing after reunion and then forgot about!
One 4 All.
The simple put and unemotional phrase echoed around the office. The three employees' sat still in disbelief as Angel sat staring at them, getting annoyed they weren't leaving. He watched as Cordelia's eyes turned, gradually, from their deep seeded light to cold and uninviting. Angel tried to convince himself that he was doing this to protect them. The only time he had managed to stake Darla was when he was with Buffy. She had loved him but not humanised him; in all the time they were together Angel never once forgot he was a Vampire. Darla would come after the ones he cared about and this time it wouldn't be his Slayer. They had to be saved for their own sakes, they were like dogs with a bone; never letting it go. They would protect him and defend him on any whim, die for him and it was a burden he could no longer afford to carry.
~~Angel's PoV~~ I was doing the same thing I do every night, hunting down Darla and Drucillia. I had been tracking them through the sewers; always they remained one step ahead of me. The manhole came up beside a trendy nightclub, like the ones Cordelia would drag us along to when she was bored. I could hear the heartbeats; feel the excitement emanating from them. They reminded me so much of Cordelia. I pushed the thought from my head, concentrating on Darla's scent. She was in the club. I headed towards it.
It was then I saw her. She was emerging from a limousine beside the red carpet. She looked like the dream I would I was have. The midnight blue dress long to the floor, almost backless so I could see the little sun tattoo she has. It clings to her body like liquid, moving as she moved, shimmering as she took her dates hand. He looked like one of those characters out of a movie, all shiny hair and muscular bodies. He looked at her like she was a prize, a glittering prize. I knew the look on his face; it was possessiveness. I never would of thought Cordelia would ever let anyone look at her like that, but she was. Her arm was inside his, hands clasped. She seemed to turn around, searching the darkness in my direction, but she could never have known I was there. I don't know what possessed me but I went inside after her. The bodies were packed from wall to wall, all sweating and moving in a peculiar way to music that reminded me faintly of Cordelia. I kept my back to the wall, trying to block out the sound of all that blood rushing around their veins, waiting to be drained. I must have been concentrating a little too hard as I felt a slim, boney, hand grasp my throat and slam me into the wall. Cordelia looked so mad. I have seen her mad.break-a-nail-and-covered-in-demon-goo mad and me-sleep-with-Darla mad but never I-wanna-kill-you mad. Her eyes were cold and her face expressionless as she stared at me, not talking. The silence scared me as much as her lack of expression.
"Why are you following me?" Cordelia hissed at me in a harsh whisper.
I had never heard so much hate in a voice before, and I have Angelus taunts everyday and night. Her eyes were cold and hollow, no light in them. I used to look in her eyes and yearn for some of that light, just to keep me safe and almost human. I never felt more unhuman in that moment. The only thing to do was to act indifferent. Two could play the game of hurt.
"I'm not. Darla's in here somewhere. I have to find her before she does some serious damage."
I saw her face fall for a second but ever the actress her cold eyes and stoney face was back.
"Always about Darla. Darla did this and Darla did that. Maybe we should give DARLA the Victorian Cross for her services to humanity!"
I knew I had hurt her.again. Her defences were up, the mask of indifference plainly displayed on her face. I feel like crap. I've done this to her, to all of them. I've turned her back into the bitch, there is no other word to describe it, that she was in Sunnydale. We, Doyle, and me tried so hard to bring her out of that state of mind. God what would Doyle say about what I've done. Suddenly I had had enough.
"Cordelia, Darla kills people. People we are meant to protect."
"What people we were meant to save while you were screwing her. People WE were meant to be saving while you tried to lose your soul. A soul we fought so hard to keep. The people that Wes was protecting while he got shot. You seem to forget that we work just as hard as you do and care about the innocent people as much as you do, we just don't go off boning our Sires to do it. Now if you're finished your stalker gig, I'm gonna go back to my date because unlike you, he has integrity."
Before I could reach out and grab, tell her how wrong she was, how much I was trying to protect her from Darla she was gone. I watched her sway her way back into the crowd. She belonged in here, among all the beautiful people who would lavish their attention on her.
Without looking around, I knew she was there. It was a bond that was 250 year-old bond that I guess would never be broken. I once loved her, well loved her as much a soulless monster could.
"What do you want Darla?" I muttered without giving her satisfaction of seeing my broken face.
"Oh dear my dear boy. Tut tut tut. You've let the Seer into that unbeating thing you call a heart. You're a demon, you will never have a heart." She giggled darkly. "I remember the days when you used to eat them. New born's were you're favourite."
I began to twist my wrist towards her but the stake simply plunged into the wall. She knew me better than I thought. But she was right. I would never have a heart but now as I sit here in the dark, the hotel dusty and dead without Cordelia's touch, I feel my heart breaking in two. In my hands I hold a cream coloured piece of card with gold inscription inviting me to the wedding of Cordelia Chase and Edward DeNue. I don't think she sent it to me to be malice 'cause she sent a note with it.
Dear Angel. How long can a person stay mad? I don't think I'm mad anymore, just sorry that you seem to have lost everything. Hope Inc. is doing really well, Wes and Gunn still having toy fights about who's exactly is charge. I've kinda taken a backseat as my role in Edward's business takes up a lot of my time. I really want you to come the wedding so I could say this to your face but I know deep down inside that you want so I'll say it now. Goodbye. Angel we have no future as friends. You betrayed me and all I have done is protect you since you went all beige. I've kept your road to redemption clear for you for three months by fighting the vision but now you are on your own.
Goodbye Angel
Cordelia.
I knew that from the moment I read it that she was gone. I had loved and lost again and had no one to blame but myself. She even killed Darla to give me a head start. Maybe I will brush out my morning suit. Maybe I better start being the man Cordelia tried to get me to be. All of a sudden Cordelia is a burden I want to carry.
Just something that I started writing after reunion and then forgot about!
One 4 All.
The simple put and unemotional phrase echoed around the office. The three employees' sat still in disbelief as Angel sat staring at them, getting annoyed they weren't leaving. He watched as Cordelia's eyes turned, gradually, from their deep seeded light to cold and uninviting. Angel tried to convince himself that he was doing this to protect them. The only time he had managed to stake Darla was when he was with Buffy. She had loved him but not humanised him; in all the time they were together Angel never once forgot he was a Vampire. Darla would come after the ones he cared about and this time it wouldn't be his Slayer. They had to be saved for their own sakes, they were like dogs with a bone; never letting it go. They would protect him and defend him on any whim, die for him and it was a burden he could no longer afford to carry.
~~Angel's PoV~~ I was doing the same thing I do every night, hunting down Darla and Drucillia. I had been tracking them through the sewers; always they remained one step ahead of me. The manhole came up beside a trendy nightclub, like the ones Cordelia would drag us along to when she was bored. I could hear the heartbeats; feel the excitement emanating from them. They reminded me so much of Cordelia. I pushed the thought from my head, concentrating on Darla's scent. She was in the club. I headed towards it.
It was then I saw her. She was emerging from a limousine beside the red carpet. She looked like the dream I would I was have. The midnight blue dress long to the floor, almost backless so I could see the little sun tattoo she has. It clings to her body like liquid, moving as she moved, shimmering as she took her dates hand. He looked like one of those characters out of a movie, all shiny hair and muscular bodies. He looked at her like she was a prize, a glittering prize. I knew the look on his face; it was possessiveness. I never would of thought Cordelia would ever let anyone look at her like that, but she was. Her arm was inside his, hands clasped. She seemed to turn around, searching the darkness in my direction, but she could never have known I was there. I don't know what possessed me but I went inside after her. The bodies were packed from wall to wall, all sweating and moving in a peculiar way to music that reminded me faintly of Cordelia. I kept my back to the wall, trying to block out the sound of all that blood rushing around their veins, waiting to be drained. I must have been concentrating a little too hard as I felt a slim, boney, hand grasp my throat and slam me into the wall. Cordelia looked so mad. I have seen her mad.break-a-nail-and-covered-in-demon-goo mad and me-sleep-with-Darla mad but never I-wanna-kill-you mad. Her eyes were cold and her face expressionless as she stared at me, not talking. The silence scared me as much as her lack of expression.
"Why are you following me?" Cordelia hissed at me in a harsh whisper.
I had never heard so much hate in a voice before, and I have Angelus taunts everyday and night. Her eyes were cold and hollow, no light in them. I used to look in her eyes and yearn for some of that light, just to keep me safe and almost human. I never felt more unhuman in that moment. The only thing to do was to act indifferent. Two could play the game of hurt.
"I'm not. Darla's in here somewhere. I have to find her before she does some serious damage."
I saw her face fall for a second but ever the actress her cold eyes and stoney face was back.
"Always about Darla. Darla did this and Darla did that. Maybe we should give DARLA the Victorian Cross for her services to humanity!"
I knew I had hurt her.again. Her defences were up, the mask of indifference plainly displayed on her face. I feel like crap. I've done this to her, to all of them. I've turned her back into the bitch, there is no other word to describe it, that she was in Sunnydale. We, Doyle, and me tried so hard to bring her out of that state of mind. God what would Doyle say about what I've done. Suddenly I had had enough.
"Cordelia, Darla kills people. People we are meant to protect."
"What people we were meant to save while you were screwing her. People WE were meant to be saving while you tried to lose your soul. A soul we fought so hard to keep. The people that Wes was protecting while he got shot. You seem to forget that we work just as hard as you do and care about the innocent people as much as you do, we just don't go off boning our Sires to do it. Now if you're finished your stalker gig, I'm gonna go back to my date because unlike you, he has integrity."
Before I could reach out and grab, tell her how wrong she was, how much I was trying to protect her from Darla she was gone. I watched her sway her way back into the crowd. She belonged in here, among all the beautiful people who would lavish their attention on her.
Without looking around, I knew she was there. It was a bond that was 250 year-old bond that I guess would never be broken. I once loved her, well loved her as much a soulless monster could.
"What do you want Darla?" I muttered without giving her satisfaction of seeing my broken face.
"Oh dear my dear boy. Tut tut tut. You've let the Seer into that unbeating thing you call a heart. You're a demon, you will never have a heart." She giggled darkly. "I remember the days when you used to eat them. New born's were you're favourite."
I began to twist my wrist towards her but the stake simply plunged into the wall. She knew me better than I thought. But she was right. I would never have a heart but now as I sit here in the dark, the hotel dusty and dead without Cordelia's touch, I feel my heart breaking in two. In my hands I hold a cream coloured piece of card with gold inscription inviting me to the wedding of Cordelia Chase and Edward DeNue. I don't think she sent it to me to be malice 'cause she sent a note with it.
Dear Angel. How long can a person stay mad? I don't think I'm mad anymore, just sorry that you seem to have lost everything. Hope Inc. is doing really well, Wes and Gunn still having toy fights about who's exactly is charge. I've kinda taken a backseat as my role in Edward's business takes up a lot of my time. I really want you to come the wedding so I could say this to your face but I know deep down inside that you want so I'll say it now. Goodbye. Angel we have no future as friends. You betrayed me and all I have done is protect you since you went all beige. I've kept your road to redemption clear for you for three months by fighting the vision but now you are on your own.
Goodbye Angel
Cordelia.
I knew that from the moment I read it that she was gone. I had loved and lost again and had no one to blame but myself. She even killed Darla to give me a head start. Maybe I will brush out my morning suit. Maybe I better start being the man Cordelia tried to get me to be. All of a sudden Cordelia is a burden I want to carry.