The door to the school roof closed silently. Yusuke Urameshi tiptoed backwards from it, snickering to himself. Yet again, he had slipped, unnoticed, out from under Keiko's watchful eye to evade class once more. "Really," he said softly to himself. "When the hell will I ever use algebra in demon world?"
"Oh, never. At least, I never do." came a voice from behind him. Yusuke spun to meet this adversary who had crept up behind him so very skillfully. The other stood on the edge of the roof, slightly elevated above Yusuke's eye level. Standing in front of the late morning sun, the only discernible feature of this intruder was its silhouette. Roughly five feet tall, and slightly plump (to say the least), the abomination sprouted horns from its head. The horns trailed tails down to the beast's shoulders. The shoulders themselves had large finlike appendages on them. From the creature's rotund midsection draped an odd pair of wings. The apparition's feet were round and planted firmly on the wall surrounding the roof. The silhouette did not match the high, reedy, almost squeaky voice of its owner. Yusuke took a step back into his defensive stance, prepared to battle the encroacher. The thin voice spoke again.
"Let me introduce myself." The creature leapt down from the wall with a thud and approached the detective. As it drew closer its features became distinguishable. The horns were pigtails of blondish, wavy hair. The shoulder fin were ruffles on a vest. The winglike protrusions were actually a half skirt wrapped around the back of the form, and the thick feet were housed in combat boots. To add flair to the ensemble, the ruffled vest was bright pink, the shirt under it was dark blue. The skirt (the half of it that was present) was yellow, the skin tight (or at least they were stretched so far they ended up being skin tight) pants under the skirt were at one point black, but had faded to a mild grey color. The "demon" was nothing more than a human girl with very poor fashion sense.
"Hi, Yusuke. My name is Mary." the stranger said, reaching out her hand to shake the detective's. Uncertainly, Yusuke took the hand and shook it briefly. When he tried to pull back, he realized his mistake. Mary had him, and did not appear to be letting go any time soon. "I just moved here. I may look American, but I am only half American. I'm also half Japanese. And Half demon." Mary spouted, unaware that Yusuke was trying to retrieve his hand from her vice-like grip. "I am a mazoku, to." Yusuke was so engrossed in trying to free himself from the leeching grasp, he did not notice the error in Mary's grammar.
"Actually, you're just human. Could I have my hand bac..." he began.
"YUSUKE URAMESHI!" came a loud, angry voice from behind him. Keiko stood in the entrance to the school, visibly fuming at her errant boyfriend. "What are you doing on this roof and not in class, and who is that?" the brown haired girl demanded as she approached the couple.
"Keiko, I..." Yusuke began, but trailed off when he saw Keiko's expression change. Hurt was written on her features as she gazed forlornly at the locked hands of the two before her. "Kei, no wait! This is not what it looks like! I don't... We're not... It's nothing..." he protested, renewing his efforts to withdraw his hand from the other female's.
"It's okay, Yusuke." Keiko said softly, turning. "I'll just go back to class." Glumly, she turned to leave.
"Wait! Keiko, don't leave me here with her!" Yusuke called out desperately.
"Oh! You're Keiko?" Mary said. "I've read about you in fanfictions. I know everything from fanfiction, so I never bothered to actually watch the show or read the comics. You're the one who always beats up Yusuke with frying pans." Keiko stopped.
"What are you talking about? I never hit him, except a few times when he lifted my skirt or poked my behind. But I only slapped him. I've never hit him with anything like a frying pan. If you want violent, you should talk to Botan. That ferry girl can swing a bat like a pro. But, wait... Fanfictions? I have no idea what you are talking about. Who are you?" Keiko turned and regarded the girl with an appraising glance.
"I'm Mary. Mary Sue Wannabe. See, it's like wasabi, but not like wasabi. It's the half of me that's Japanese. The other half in American. The other half is demon." the girl explained in a torrent of babble.
"That's three halves." Keiko said, raising an eyebrow.
"Uh huh. That's cause I'm special." Mary confirmed.
"Special like riding the short bus special." Yusuke mumbled, finally tearing his hand from Mary's. Keiko did not chide him for his rude remark. She was too busy trying not to chuckle.
"Oh, lookie at the time. I have to go." Mary announced. "I'm so smart that I take classes both here at the junior high and over at Kurama's high school, even though I am only eleven years old. I have to go now! But I'll see you later for the mission, Yusuke, darling." In a flourish of mismatched colors and ruffles and skirt and combat boots, Mary Sue raced off the roof and disappeared into the distance. Dazed, Yusuke and Keiko both sat on the roof.
"What was that all about?" Keiko asked.
"No idea, but I hope she isn't coming back." Yusuke said. Keiko nodded.
--
Kurama had just finished biology lab and was preparing to go to gym class when a squeaky voice behind him caught him offguard. With little more than a fractional widening of his viridian eyes, the fox turned to face yet another fangirl. His customary smile did not falter as he gazed at one of the strangest...girls(?) he had yet encountered. She was dressed rather questionably, and seemed young to be attending high school. Staring longingly into his eyes, the person repeated her greeting. "Hello, Kurama, my love."
Widening his famous Shuuichi Smile, Kurama calmly regarded the odd newcomer. "Excuse me, I believe you have me confused with someone else. My name is Shuuichi, and I don't believe we have met before." Carefully stepping aside, the kitsune tried to walk away, but Mary shifted as well, effectively blocking his path.
"Oh, it's ok, I know all about you. I rad fanfiction. Your a fox spirit, you got shot by a hunter, you escaped to the human world, and now your suiiichi mininiimo."
Kurama stared at this girl for a moment before calmly asking, "How did you do that?"
"Oh, I read fanfiction so I know it all." she replied.
"No, I mean your dialogue." Kurama elaborated. "Somehow you managed to misspell words while speaking, and to effectively demolish all known rules of grammar, as well as my name. Until this moment, I did not believe all that was possible to accomplish in spoken dialogue." The kitsune involuntarily took a step back. Anyone who could mangle language so effectively as to misspell a spoken word could be dangerous.
"Oh that. It's a talent; I'm special." Mary announced proudly.
"Indeed. If you'll excuse me." Kurama said politely, trying again to step around the girl in his path, and again failing.
"No no no! You have to come with me. There's an important mission from Spirit World and you and I have to save the day, dearest." Mary insisted. Kurama just sighed. Apparently he was not to be rid of this girl so quickly. "Really, Kurama - uh - suuiichii."
"Really, you don't have to double every vowel..." Kurama began.
"No, we have to go, now! My demon senses are tingling, and I feel dangerous ki approaching!" the girl wailed plaintively.
"You're human." Kurama stated flatly.
"No, only part human. I'm half American, half Japanese, and half demon." Mary insisted.
"You're human." Kurama repeated aloud. To himself he added, 'and confused'.
"I'll show you my demon powers later, now we have to go!" the girl bellowed, grabbing Kurama's hand and dragging him from the building. Somehow, the fox could not free himself from her grip. 'If only she had such a firm grip on reality.' Kurama mused as he was pulled towards the forest around Genkai's temple.