A/N: A little fairy tale that came to me. It's supposed to be rather light and funny, and I hope it manages those attributes. It is complete, though I'm not quite as happy with the last chapter as I am the rest. For now, it has seven chapters, and I will post a new one in a couple of days or so.
Please let me know what you think!
Jimli :D
Too Beautiful
Chapter 1
In the kingdom of Trova, the royal family was rejoicing because a baby girl had just been born to them. Relations between their land and their neighbors had been very strained, as things often were between trolls and humans, and the princess was just the thing to help with the diplomacy. After all, what better way to ally two kingdoms than an arranged marriage?
Unfortunately, most of their neighbors were...less than enthusiastic about such a proposal.
King Aleder didn't know why, really. The little princess wasn't much now, but his queen, Esmelda, was a beauty, not just by troll standards, either. More than one human king and prince had commented on her comeliness. That one caliph from the Southern Empire of Rabashstan had even tried to make off with her after a diplomatic meeting!
One kingdom, a tiny valley country to the southeast, took Aleder's offer of uniting Princess Penepé with their own young addition, Prince Renaldo. It wasn't even a surprise why, either.
Prince Renaldo hailed from Umbria, which in addition to having Trova along its northwestern border, managed to border three other large kingdoms, Baldic, Thessia, and Latia.
Two of those, Baldic and Latia, also wrapped around Umbria to touch Trova. King Aleder had many, many meetings and talks with the kings from those countries and had found them disagreeable sorts. Admittedly, he didn't know much about the third country, except diplomatic gossip, but he figured odds were they weren't much different.
Umbria, he knew, had problems with these bigger neighbors for having the audacity to be autonomous, instead of merging with one of them. "Merging" here meant "being invaded and added to the larger kingdom's conquests".
Trova, thankfully, was sizeable enough to hold its own against the grumbles of war and "merging".
All-in-all, though, Aleder was not unhappy with the idea of allying with Umbria. Once other human kingdoms saw how well this alliance went, he had no doubt that they'd drop their torch-and-pitchfork mentality about the troll kingdom.
Play dates were arranged as soon as travel was comfortably feasible for the young ones, and the first meeting went well enough.
The prince and princess were only one, but they swapped out rattles to chew happily on the other's toy. That was a good sign, right?
King Aleder's uneasiness grew when Penepé turned 12.
Despite her mother's good looks, Aleder was quickly becoming convinced that his daughter wasn't going to be the beauty he'd hoped. Normally, that wouldn't be an issue, of course. She was smart, funny, clever, tall: all good traits for a being. She was also honest, if sometimes blunt or harsh about it. She wasn't spoiled, and though he'd be hard-pressed to say she was sweet, she was kind. Just sympathetic and caring enough without being too soft-hearted, especially considering the tough decisions that royalty often dealt with.
She was betrothed to a human, though. Humans were fussy enough about appearance and a troll, even a beautiful one, could be a hard sell, he'd found. And Princess Penepé wasn't beautiful. She wasn't even pretty, if he were honest and objective. (A tough call only a good king could make.)
Then again, all beings went through those awkward phases as they grew older, maybe that was it.
She had a few years to sort it out, without worrying about King Theodore and Queen Marla's thoughts, though. They and Prince Renaldo were touring their own country, followed by extensive trips to neighboring countries, as well as some not-so-neighboring.
Queen Marla was part of the old royal lines, meaning if there was a human royal within a bird's flight, she was a cousin or better to him. Not only was there a lot of family to visit, but their arrangement with Trova had delayed quite a few trips while Renaldo was younger, and now it was catch up time.
A well-timed one, in Aleder's opinion. Not only would it alleviate some of his worries, but with a nice, current, friendly visit to foreign places and family, Marla and Theodore could solidify relations that had become shaky or distant before the alliance with Trova came together. A tighter network of familial relations for better diplomacy with Trova.
Renaldo was slightly older than Penepé, so he was already seventeen, though only just, when they returned, and the first thing the royals decided to do was ensure that the marriage was still on schedule for after the princess's seventeenth birthday.
All three Trovan royals dressed nicely, prepared to receive these most special of guests.
King Aleder greeted all three Umbrian royals in the front meeting room while Queen Esmelda and Princess Penepé finished getting ready.
Inwardly, Aleder frowned as he looked over Renaldo.
He was somewhat darker complexioned with dark brown hair and dark blue eyes. Having known many, many humans, he knew the prince's features weren't in themselves so unusual, but exotic in the combination. A beauty.
Princess Penepé was not.
Before he could reflect more on this, the queen and princess came into the room. Aleder was surprised to see Renaldo's eyes light up until he realized the young man was fixated on his wife, not his daughter.
"My dear Penepé," he began.
(Aleder winced at how rich and melodious his voice was.)
"How simply beautifully you've grown!"
The queen smiled and laughed.
"Oh you shameless flatterer, Renaldo!"
She turned her attention to Penepé.
"Still a charming little rogue, isn't he, Penepé?"
Renaldo was grateful for the queen's diplomatic and clever cover of his mistake, and he turned his smile to the princess instead.
Aleder looked between the queen and the princess.
Esmelda had a face shaped like a raindrop; Penepé's was shaped like a pumpkin.
Esmelda's eyes were large and round, with an interesting lime green color; Penepé's were lopsided, the right one larger than the left, and the two different colors didn't help since the right one was a bright, vivid green and the left one was a deep, murky yellow. Her mouth, too, was lopsided, one side turned down, one turned up.
Esmelda was short by troll standards, a petite thing, though she was comparable in size to the human prince. Penepé was tall and broad even for a male troll; she towered over the prince by a foot and was just as broad.
Aleder was prepared for the reaction, he braced himself, wondering how tactfully the neighboring monarchs were going to cover the prince's next words.
"I apologize for my mistake, princess. I should have recognized the queen's beauty. I simply was taken aback by the robust charm of your person and assumed such maturity belonged to the queen."
He smiled.
The princess frowned.
"I'm not sure I want to marry you," she said.
"Why? Have I offended you, princess? If so, I give you my sincerest-"
"No, you've been kind enough, I suppose, and you gracefully covered your mistake with my mother. I don't not want to marry you for that. I don't want to marry you because you're too handsome."
Everyone blinked at the princess.
"I'm too what?"
"Too handsome," the princess said patiently. "I was prepared for you to be handsome, I suppose. Most humans are fairly comely. But you are just too handsome."
Aleder opened his mouth to respond to his daughter's strange declaration, but she continued.
"And it's nothing to do with how I think about myself, like I think I'm not worthy of such beauty. I know I'm not a pretty troll, especially to a human, but I don't care about that, I never have. At least, not since I realized I wasn't pretty. But you are too handsome."
With that final declaration, she bowed to the entire room and went back up the stairs.
"Was I just accused of being too handsome?" Renaldo asked wonderingly.
"I am sor-" Aleder hastily began, but Queen Marla interrupted with a smile.
"No, no, it is fine. Perhaps we should come back later. We need to return to Umbria. I do not mean to say the wedding is off, but perhaps postponed? Until the prince and princess can sort this out?"
Her tone was hopeful and her smile genuine. Both Aleder and Esmelda breathed a sigh of relief.
"Yes, yes of course," Esmelda said, approaching Marla and clasping her hands. "I believe the best course of action would be to postpone things. Let me talk to Penepé, see what the root of this is. I shall be in touch very soon. Do feel free to come again, of course. We very much want this to work out in everyone's best interests."