This was bad. It hadn't occurred to him until right then. Not until that very second. His mouth dropped open a fraction with the shock of his realization. Why HER? Whatever power was sittin' up there in his fancy clouded heaven or whatnot sure had some gorram sick sense of humor. Funny, right? To make him fall in love? No, not really. Not to Jayne.

Not when he knew he didn't have a shot in hell with that girl. Too young. And too smart. Just too high above him in every way that counted. He didn't necessarily think of himself in a negative light but… River Tam was just so… he cut that thought off. The merc sat himself down on the weight bench. More like flopped down. He was completely horrified. River Tam. River Anne Tam. River Anne Cobb? He physically flinched. He hated thinking thoughts he couldn't control. He hated thinking thoughts period. But that's what she always got him doin'. Thinking. Thinking about her with his last name attached.

She ain't yours yet! Yet? No! Not yet, not ever!

...Why?

His hands were shaking a little bit. He needed something to do. Looking around quickly and avoiding the spot in the cargo bay where he knew River was, his gaze settled on Candie and he picked her up to give her a good cleaning. River's soft giggle echoed across the bay and Jayne polished the gun in his hand a little more forcefully than necessary.

Why not Kaylee or Zoe or even Inara? Hell, Kaylee and him came from basically the same background, they was similar folk. Core girl like River were more likely to kill a man with her bare hands than look twice at a guy like him. Then again, River most likely had. So did that mean…? NO, no it didn't. Why not Zoe? She was a warrior, she could get inside his head. And that was worth somethin', weren't it? But Jayne knew she didn't get inside his heart, under his skin like his River-girl did. He growled deep in his throat No gorram nicknames! He insisted mentally.

Why couldn't he have fallen for Inara? She was safe, knew where he stood with her. She was gorram beautiful enough. But in his eyes, she paled next to River. Jayne sighed shakily. This was BAD. The merc cast a glance over at her. She was on the other side of the bay sketching Zoe and Mal in a fierce game of Chinese checkers. He considered her briefly. She was so young. So special. Jayne shook himself, he didn't like getting' all sappy, even inside his own head.

He'd started thinkin' on her way back after the incident on Ariel. How special she musta been for the Alliance to want her back so bad. After Miranda, well, she just wouldn't get outta his head. At night, sometimes all her could think about was those doors opening and her standing there like… like him. Prettier, more graceful, but like him. Just exactly aware of how deadly she was. Sometimes, when he was fighting with her (words or guns, didn't matter) it felt like something inside her matched something inside him. He swallowed reflexively, trying to keep down the bile he wasn't tasting. Sometimes, he couldn't help but thinkin' on her all soft-like. To be honest it scared the ever livin' hell outta him. Jayne wasn't one for things he couldn't control. He cheated at cards, carried guns on his person to level any score that might come up and he rarely (if ever) worked with partners. Even with Mal and Zoe he was strictly a solo act. River Tam was an unknown factor. She just couldn't be predicted, not ever.

Like when those blast doors opened. In a thousand gorram years he never would have guessed that he'd end up more turned than ever before in his life, just from seein' her standing there. Jayne looked down and sighed. He'd almost rubbed a hole in Candie's finish. He felt slightly guilty. Just cuz he'd gone and done the stupidest thing in his life didn't give him no call to take it out on his weaponry. He set Candie down and picked up Rhonda, then started to take her apart. He didn't even need to watch as he did it, he knew his guns so well. His gaze drifted back to River. Her thin wavy dress was riding a bit high on her legs and Jayne almost groaned at all the pale leg he could see. His pulled his gaze back down to Rhonda. That didn't stick for long. Like a he was north and she was south, she pulled his eyes back up to her.

He could tell she felt his eyes on her when she stiffened the tiniest bit and stopped drawing. She pulled her hair over to her opposite shoulder so that Jayne could see her neck and better see the side of her face. She dared a glance at him. Their eyes met and he held her gaze. Before he could help himself he grinned at her. It was just a gut reaction, smile at the woman you love, right? Wrong, so wrong. But… her eyes widened and her mouth dropped open a fraction, her cheeks colored pink instead of creamy white. She was blushin' over him? Huh.

Jayne, in a moment of madness, decided to test a theory. It was a crazy one, but involved a crazy girl, so just maybe it could work itself out. He tossed a slow wink at her. Instantly her cheeks turned a deeper shade of pink and she smiled shyly at him before averting her eyes. Jayne was glad she weren't watching him no more because he was full out beaming. Gorram cute thing was shy, and ruttin affected by him too. He'd love to see how far the blush extended down her body. But that would never happen…. Right? He took a half second to consider.

Wrong

A crazy notion took a hold of Jayne then. What if falling for her hadn't been the dumbest thing he'd ever done? It felt a sure thing that he didn't deserve her but did that mean he couldn't have her? For however brief or long a period of time?

Jayne Cobb worked himself a plan just then. A dangerous one, though most plans he worked up were just that. And before he had even gotten the details or even some of the majors factors decided on, he was committed. He was decided in that his plan would be implemented and soon. He was going to seduce River Tam, with the ultimate goal of making her River Cobb. Jayne pieced Rhonda back up and gathered his guns before he headed off to his bunk. A spring evident in his step.

On the other side of the bay, River watched him go with awe. She felt it coming, something that would change her. She promised herself she wouldn't peek into anyone's mind and she intended to keep this promise. But Jayne was planning something… she could feel it on the wind, not that there was any real wind on Serenity. She tried hard to guess what his newest scheme could be, but for the life of her couldn't guess. The sheer number of things that could be on his mind thrilled her a tiny bit. She smiled and returned to sketching, suddenly itching for the next time she would see him.