Prompt: After 12x16, Jo is regretful about not saying ILY to Alex for so long & talks to him about it
I Love You
Jo Wilson's steps were slow as she left the gallery, and her conversation with Penny, behind. She had a sinking feeling in her stomach as she reflected back on the day she showed Alex the loft. She had been so set on convincing him that the loft would be a nice place to live, that... "Oh no," the brunette groaned, the mental image of his face coming to mind. That look on his face...the realization in his eyes that she did love him... He probably didn't hear a thing she'd said after that. Alex had focused on the fact that she loved him. Nothing else mattered to him.
Just like nothing else mattered to Penny. Penny went out on a limb, told Callie she loved her, and what did she get in return. What did she want in return?
A confirmation.
How many times had Alex put himself out on a limb for her? Wanting forever with her? Wanting a home with her? Wanting roots with her? And what had she given him in return?
"Oh crap, oh crap!" the resident exclaimed, moving faster towards the OR board. Was Alex in surgery now? Good grief, she had to fix this! Had Alex been like Penny? Had he sat there waiting for her to confirm her feelings for him? Wanting her to say the words he needed to hear? Did he wonder if she really loved him or not? "Hey!" Jo yelped, rounding the hall and banging into someone.
"Wilson, where's the fire?" Alex chuckled, his arm shooting out to steady her. Instead of answering him, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him thoroughly. The type of kiss they usually shared after a stupid fight. "Mm, you have my attention," he mused, putting his forehead to hers.
"We need to talk," the brunette whispered in return, biting her lip and looking into his eyes.
Alex stilled. "Talk?" he questioned. "We need to talk?"
"Not like that!" Jo assured him quickly. "I just need to talk to you about something that I don't want the interns, nurses, and the rest of the hospital to hear."
"Okay..." The peds surgeon took her wrist, leading her to an oncall room, poking his head inside before motioning her in, and closing the door behind them. "What's up?"
"I just had a talk with Penny," the resident began, moving her hands as she talked. "She was telling me how she told Callie she loved her, but Callie didn't say it back..."
"Torres left her hanging?" Alex chuckled, crossing his arms over his chest. "Burn."
"Alex!" Jo exclaimed, swatting his shoulder. "You can't tell anyone, okay? I don't know who knows and who doesn't."
"Fine, whatever," he rolled his eyes. "The point, Wilson?"
"Right," the younger woman nodded. "Anyway, Penny didn't really say that much, but...I could just tell she was really bummed out, you know? If it didn't bother her, why was she talking about it?"
"Yeah, putting yourself out there like that and not getting anything in return sucks." He raised an eyebrow, wondering what exactly she was getting at.
Jo sighed heavily and looked down, toying with her hands. "It just...it got me thinking, you know? About us...and...we've been together for a long time..."
"Four years," he interjected.
"Right, four years," she nodded, biting her lip. "I was just thinking about us...our ups and downs, and I started thinking about the loft... Do you remember the night I first showed you the loft?"
"I do," Alex nodded. It was a night he'd never forget. That was the night she told him she loved him. "You told me you loved me that night."
"Yeah," the resident smiled softly. "I just...I remember your face...and how...I dunno, serious you looked...and then today with Penny... I just, did I do that to you? Did I upset you? Make you wonder about us? Question us? Question...me?"
The surgeon looked away, contemplating how exactly he was going to answer her questions. He couldn't really tell her that he spent numerous hours at Joe's with Jackson and Ben, venting about her and her lack of commitment. "I did question you, and us," he finally admitted. "Not really because of anything you did or didn't do, but...because of us in general. You're at the start of your career, Jo. You have so many things to focus on-your patients, exams, and your specialty. I shouldn't cause you any more stress, you know? I figured you'd come around eventually." Not to mention the obvious age difference. When he was Jo's age, he was looking for everything but a serious relationship.
"Oh, Alex," his girlfriend sighed, crossing the distance between them. "I've loved you since the tree."
"The tree?!" he verified, his eyebrows shooting upward. "When the tree crashed into the freaking living room?"
"Yeah," Jo nodded, moving her hands to the back of his neck and holding him close. "What we had...it just...it moved so perfectly, you know? We became friends so easily, and our relationship formed so easily, and...everything with us has been so natural. Loving you is natural to me. Like breathing. I don't think about breathing, I just do it. I never thought about loving you, I just did it." She quirked her head up at him. "I'm sorry for not telling you sooner."
A smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth before he pulled her closer to him and kissed her. "Let's see what else we can do naturally," he wiggled his eyebrows and moved her towards the bed. He had everything he needed now.