Disclaimer: I don't own Saiyuki, but I wanna hug 'em! Can I, can I, can i?
Lonely
Hakkai loved to cook; it was obvious. He was always buying and reading cookbooks, baking treats for the few holidays the group celebrated, and trying to teach the others to do the saying… TRYING…
Now, Hakkai was in the kitchen again; this time, in a home of his own. The journey and the battle against Gyumao was long over, and Hakkai found that he could cook whenever and whatever he wanted- free of time limits and distractions. He prepared a large feast, like he had done right after the victory; dozens of gourmet dishes were already set out on the table, ready to be eaten.
There was a smile on his face, despite the great effort it took to prepare such a large meal. He smiled down, also, at his apron, which read 'KISS THE COOK'. It was a present that his companions had bought for him while they were still on their journey. That small token of friendship, if anything, was what made him happy, and made him want to cool for his friends. He just loved wearing it! It brought him a feeling of joy…
He turned off the stove and carries the final dish to the dining area, eyes closed and smiling. Through the blackness of the inside of his eyelids, he could see the excited look on Goku's face, the expectancy and hunger and impatience on Gojyo's, and Sanzo's content- yet still grumpy- expression.
But this was not reality. He tried to avoid it, but he opened his eyes, anyway, and he knows it is not true. They are not there anymore. The journey had long been over, and his companions had already gone their separate ways quite some time ago. He was practically alone in his empty home. The only one at the table was his loyal pet dragon, lightly nibbling on one of the dishes.
"Dinner… is all ready… everyone. E-eat up now… before it gets cold…"
But he was the one who felt cold inside. He lowered his head, letting his bangs cover his eyes, as an insane smiled crept across his face. He was shaking. He lazily drops the dish he'd been holding and fell to his knees on the cold, wooden floor. Hakuryuu flew over and perched on his shaking shoulder. The little dragon licked his master's cheek, and then, tears rolled down over his cheeks. Hakkai covers his leaking eyes as he broke down.
"Everyday, Hakuryuu… I prepare the same food… as I did before… hoping to see three other faces waiting impatiently for it… I keep waiting… and waiting… and waiting… But, I am alone now… Now, and forever… I-I just want them to come back…!"
"Kyuu…"