Yay first Jily fic! Randomly inspired on the bus…

Ultimately, this is for the Jily fans on Tumblr, specifically for what's become known as "Jily October". I'm thrilled to participate and contribute something to this, so I hope you all enjoy!

XXX

No Smoke Without Fire

James leant over his son's crib, desperately trying to calm the infant. How does Lily do it? James thought to himself. Why did she have to leave me with him? Why did she leave him with me? It's not like I know anything about babies.

"Hey little man, chin up. Mum'll be home soon."

The baby continued to wail. Should I pick him up? What if I drop him? Oh Merlin why did I agree to this? "Come on please? I've checked everything; you're fed, burped, cleaned up, read to and rocked." James was getting desperate. "What more can I do Harry?"

James cast his eyes around the small nursery. Did Lily say something about a blanket? Does he need a blanket? Potter what are you saying, it's the middle of June.

He looked back at Harry. "What about a song? I could sing a lullaby?"

He'd figured it wasn't the worst idea he'd had all day.

"Fair warning little man, I'm not very good."

James sung a few off key notes before Harry's cries became even louder.

"Woah calm down!" James was verging on panic by this stage. "I don't know what you want Harry, please just stop crying."

Without thinking, James grabbed his wand.

"Silencio!"

Sparks flew in the air as Harry was cut off mid wail. Whilst relieved at the relief from the constant noise, Jamesknew he didn't have long before he would have to take the charm off Harry. Spells could be dangerous on young children, they weren't yet able to cope with magic in its focused form.

Maybe he should call Remus. He was usually good with Harry. Or perhaps Peter, James had a vague recollection of lots of young cousins the one time they had all met up at his house in summer. James looked down at his son and frowned in confusion.

Harry's eyes were still welling with tears, but for all purposes, he had stopped crying. "That's it little man," James said, gingerly picking him up. He reversed the spell. Harry's eyes went wide but he remained quiet.

James looked from his wand to Harry. "You like the sparks do you? Well that's something I can deal with."

Flicking his wand, James grinned in delight as Harry reached for the blue lights. "Look at the lights Harry," James said softly.

Green created a sudden laugh as Harry threw his hands up. James tried to keep the sparks out of Harry's reach, not knowing whether they would burn him. The two had fun playing quietly. Harry's favourite was by far the red sparks. James looked proudly down at his son. "A Gryffindor already, aren't you?"

Harry looked sleepily at his father and James cradled him close to his chest. "Time for nigh-nighs is it Harry?"

Carefully, James stood up and carried Harry to his crib. Laying him down gently, James couldn't help but watch in awe as his son slept peacefully. "We did good Lily."

XXX

It was mid-afternoon when Lily returned to her home in Godric's Hollow. Looking around the living room, she smiled to hear the sounds of Harry's laughter coming from the nursery. She had been terrified to leave her young son for the first time, even knowing how capable James was with him. Her husband had always been wonderful around Harry, and she loved to see her boys interacting with each other. Lily fell in love every time she saw James, and loved to discover more about him each day. Before Harry had been born, she'd suspected he'd be impatient with children, unsure of how to treat them, having no siblings of his own. She knew he wasn't a perfect father, but he had surprised her with the tender care he had shown their son from the beginning. Or perhaps he hadn't. Looking back, Lily couldn't imagine ever believing that James would be anything but amazing at fatherhood.

Now she walked into Harry's nursery with a smile on her face. James was making little lights with his wand for Harry and the two were smiling and laughing together.

Lily stopped short, her smilefixed on her face. Those weren't little lights James was conjuring.

"What are you doing?" Lily shrieked. James jerked his head upwards and startled, Harry stopped laughing. "Putting sparks near Harry, what if you hurt him?"

"Lily, I know what I'm doing," James said, his mouth thinning.

"No you don't, that's the problem!" Lily ranted. "Those are sparks, ELECTRICITY JAMES YOU UNDERSTAND?"

Harry started wailing again. They both ignored him.

"Lily, you know very well it's not electricity, it's magic." Frustration laced James' voice.

"Magic, electricity, it's pure energy James, it's dangerous!"

"Lily, MY mother did this when I was a baby. It's perfectly safe!"

"How do you know?"

"I turned out alright didn't I?"

"Sometimes I wonder," spat Lily. "You must have sustained some damage, if you think that this was a good idea."

"Well, if you're so clever, YOU calm him down." With that, James thrust the wailing baby to Lily and stormed out of the room.

Lily ran after him. "Wait James, where are you going?"

"Out."

"But James, you can't, what about Voldemort?"

"I'll be fine, Lils. I just need to clear my head."

James looked back at Lily, his expression softening. "Look, I'm sorry you thought I put Harry in danger. I love him, you know that, I don't want to hurt him." He turned away from his wife slowly. "I'll be at Sirius' place for a few hours."

Trying to ignore the lump in her throat, Lily nodded.

"Make sure you come home."

James nodded wearily and Apparated.

Lily held back her tears and looked down at her son. "Mummy really screwed up this time, didn't she?"

Harry looked up at her, large eyes filled with tears.

XXX

"And then she went off, yelling about the sparks," James finished, looking over at his best mate. Sirius' lips twitched. "It's not funny Padfoot. I didn't even do anything this time!"

"Reckon it could be the hormones?" Sirius asked lazily. "I mean witches get a bit funny every now and again if you catch my meaning."

James rolled his eyes. "Trust me it's not that."

Sirius shrugged. "Then chances are Lily's just scared. I mean did she get to tell you what happened at the meeting today?"

"No, why?"

"Well, the Prewetts were found dead today by their younger sister."

"What? You're sure?"

Sirius looked over at James, eyebrow raised. "I do pay attention sometimes Prongs."

"Had to check mate. How did it happen?"

"It sounds like Old Voldy came and did the dirty work himself."

"Oh Merlin no wonder she was upset. Didn't they only live a few towns over?"

"Better get ready to grovel, old boy," Sirius grinned suddenly. "Did she really call you brain damaged?"

"Yes," said James sulkily.

Sirius laughed. "Well it's the simple joys which make it all worthwhile. You might want to consider telling her the truth though. Your mother never played with sparks around you in her life and you know it."

James scowled at Sirius. "When did you get so smart?"

"I blame your wife entirely," called Sirius cheerfully.

James rolled his eyes and turned to Apparate away.

XXX

"Lily?" James called quietly.

His heart dropped when he spotted her curled on the couch sleeping.

"Oh Lily," he sighed sadly.

Moving carefully, so as not to wake her, James sat down beside Lily and pulled her close.

"Lily, I'm sorry I lost it. I just didn't see what the big deal was. I was just playing with Harry and I didn't think. I'm so so sorry. Padfoot told me about the Prewetts. I'm sorry I didn't give you time to tell me. I'm sorry for not recognising your fear. I'm sorry for so many things Lily. I don't deserve you and I have no idea how you'll ever forgive me." James softly kissed Lily's forehead.

"You're an idiot James," Lily said sleepily. "This is as much my fault as yours. I didn't stop to think about what you were doing. You were right; I should know you would never hurt Harry. I'm sorry for not trusting you. I'm sorry for freaking out. I just wish this blasted war would be over. I don't know why Dumbledore is wasting so much time and we're getting picked off one by one." She looked up at James. "I'm so scared."

James looked down at his wife. "So am I," he whispered. "I'm scared for Harry and for you. I'm terrified of all the possibilities."

Lily smiled wanly. "I guess I shouldn't worry about some sparks. After all, you ended up fine."

"Er, actually Lily, my mum never did anything like that. It was a fluke that I realised Harry liked them so much."

Lily sat up quickly, glaring at him.

James cringed. "I'm sorry?"

"You mean he could have been hurt?" Lily demanded. "You had no idea?"

"Maybe?"

"Ugh, I can't believe you James!"

"Forgive me?"

Lily sighed. "Only if you can forgive me for earlier."

"I can do that," James smiled.

They lay quietly together, needing no more than the warmth and comfort they brought each other.

"You know," Lily said softly. "Harry really does love those lights."

"Mmm," said James. "I think it's the colours. They must remind him of you."

"What do you mean?" asked Lily laughing.

"Well, his favourites were the red and green sparks." James said smiling happily. "And I refuse to believe that he's considering Slytherin as well as Gryffindor at this age."

"James?"

"Yes, my love?"

"You're an idiot."

"Thank you."

Lily looked up at James. "If you conjured lights for Harry so that there were no sparks, I'd be happier about it all."

"It bothers you that much?" James' brow was furrowed in confusion.

"Yes," Lily said firmly.

James looked at her for a few moments. "Ok."

"Because really it's – Wait, what do you mean ok?"

"Lily, I'm ok with that. You shouldn't have to worry about Harry here. This is a small thing I can do for the both of you. How about I conjure coloured smoke next time?"

Lily smiled at her husband. "That sounds wonderful," she murmured.

With that, James leant over and kissed her.

XXX

Thank you for reading to the end. I'm always happy to receive feedback and constructive criticism, so if you could take a minute to fill out the box below, that would be great! Otherwise, have a nice day :D