Disclaimer: Still, don't own Naruto.
This was just a short one-shot story that I wrote. I was kind of in a weird mood and needed a way to vent my feelings so this is what I came up with. And yes, I know Sasuke's completely OOC...oh well. Anyway, I hope it's decent.
He was alone. No, he was more than alone. He had no one, not even himself.
He had locked his feelings up tight, relying only on the mask he wore during the day. The mask everyone saw, the mask everyone knew him as, the mask he had become.
Naruto trudged through rain, his blonde hair sticking against his face. One arm was wrapped around himself almost in a half hug as his eyes clung to the ground. His body moved of it's own accord, dragging his feet against the muddied path. He couldn't see, hear, or feel. His body was numb…completely shut down. Only knowing he was moving by the occasional glance at his surroundings.
He felt something wet streaming down his face. Instantly knowing what it was, but making himself believe it was just the rain. He wouldn't dare show his feelings yet. Not till he was home, and the village was quiet. This was how it had always been. Saving everything until nightfall. Letting the mask come off, where no one would see.
Naruto looked up, staring blankly ahead. His vision was fogged over. The only thing he could see were the images playing in his head…over…and over…and over.
-Flashback-
Naruto dragged Sasuke down the village road towards the ramen shop. Naruto skipping and whistling all while Sasuke yelled protests left and right. You could of sworn he was screaming bloody murder. A bet was a bet. Naruto grinned at the thought of five bowls of free ramen coming his way.
Naruto broke into a sprint as they neared the ramen shop, but stopped with a jolt. His eyes wondered down an alley, Sasuke following his gaze.
It was a little girl no more than eleven years old. She was hugging her knees, rocking back and forth. Naruto stepped closer to examine her further. Her clothes were in tatters, her eyes blank, staring straight ahead. Definitely homeless.
Without thinking he walked towards her, Sasuke trailing behind him. He bent down so he was eye level with her before he spoke. "Hey." He smiled one of his most welcoming smiles. "Are you hungry? I know I am. You can come with us and we'll head over to Granny Tsunade's and find you somewhere to stay. How does that sound?" No sound. The little girl's eyes remained blank, her body rocking back and forth. Naruto turned towards Sasuke before taking the little girl's hand.
She pulled away, screaming and kicking. "No! Don't touch me! Don't! Bakemono! Get away! Get away!" Naruto felt his stomach drop. He should be used to this reaction by now, but even this little girl? Sasuke pulled Naruto aside and tried to calm the girl down. He must have told her something because in an instant she was more hysterical than before. "Stop! Get it away!" Her eyes found Naruto, and her face became full of rage. "I hate you! I hate you! My mom. You killed her! It's your fault!" Naruto's heart sank, everything around him blurred. He stood up and walked away. His feet growing heavier with each step. Faintly in the background he heard footsteps and in an instant Sasuke was at his side.
Pushing his emotions back Naruto smiled. "Geez…you try to be nice and help out an annoying brat and what do you get in return." He put his hands behind his head. "Well, I'll catch you later, Sasuke." Sasuke frowned, but before he could say anything Naruto was gone.
-End Flashback-
His eyes re-focused as he approached his apartment. All his senses came back to him including the one he hated most…feeling. He unlocked the door and crawled into bed, not caring enough to change his wet clothes and not caring enough to turn off the air condition. It was cold enough to cause his body to shake and probably cold enough to get him sick. But it didn't matter, nothing mattered.
The kyuubi. He hated the monster inside him. He hated being blamed for the things of the past. Silent tears ran down his cheeks, and knowing that soon the tears would become sobs, he buried his face under the covers.
His fists clenched together as he thought about the little girl. That wasn't the first time he had gotten that kind of reaction…actually it was probably the thousandth. Each time had stabbed at his heart, but the little girl managed to finally stab it all the way through. Of course, blowing it off like it was nothing had become routine same as crying every night. He wanted, so badly, someone to open up to, someone to support him while he cried. The tears became sobs just as he had predicted and against all his protests the little girl's screams replayed in his head.
His body ached at the thought of hurting people, the thought of causing people to remember…causing people pain. His whole existence only caused suffering. What good was he? It would probably be better for everyone if he was just gone. No one would notice. He would just slip away…disappear…from everyone's thoughts…from everyone's minds. He cried harder shaking no longer from the cold, but the tremors running through his body. This life wasn't worth living. The center of blame, fear, and all the whispers. No more. No more.
A knock at the door instantly drove the emotions deep down. He wiped his face and tried to make himself look as normal as possible. "Naruto. It's Sasuke. You there?"
Naruto cleared his throat. "Uh, ya, but, come on, I was about to go to sleep." Sasuke stood there motionless, remembering the little girl's screams and the expression on Naruto's face before he left. "Hey, you okay?"
Naruto puased, tears burning the corners of his eyes once more. "Well, I was until you woke me up." Naruto's voice quivered. Sasuke heard it and in a second he was inside looking straight at Naruto. "What the hell, teme? I'm fine, just tired."
"I see it, Naruto." Sasuke whispered.
"Sasuke, I'm fine."
"Dammit!" Sasuke's fist hit a wall. "I can see it! You're not fine."
"Sasuke…I…"
"I get it. I know what you're going through." Naruto stared at his friend. What did he know? He couldn't know how he felt? What it was like day after day.
He clenched his fists together. "No you don't! You don't get anything! I'm not the same as you." Tears ran down Naruto's face. "You don't know what it's like to be blamed and hated. To be the center of all the jokes, all the sneers, and the whispers. Completely unwanted." Naruto hung his head down towards his chest and let small sobs escape his lips. Completely unwanted. He brought his hands up to his face, but before he managed to get there, he felt something warm. Two arms wrapped around him in a hug. Sasuke.
"You're not unwanted." Sasuke whispered in his ear. "You have me. You have Sakura. We both want you here." Naruto buried his face into Sasuke's shoulder and cried.
"I can't, Sasuke. I can't. I can't take anymore of this. All the hate, all the pain. It's too much." More tremors ran through Naruto's body. "All I do is hurt people. I cause so much suffering."
Sasuke rocked Naruto back and forth. "No you don't. It's not your fault, none of it is. I promise." Naruto continued to let the tears fall as Sasuke soothing voice echoed in his ear. "I promise. I promise. I promise." Naruto pulled away from Sasuke's grip.
"Thanks, teme." Naruto smiled before wiping at his eyes with his sleeve.
Sasuke smiled. "Ya, well…don't get used to it, dobe." The same grin Sasuke remembered lit up Naruto's face. "I won't." He wasn't going to need it anymore, not if Sasuke was there.
So there it was. I fulfilled my need to write something. Review if you have time. By the way if anyone needs a beta reader, I just registered. -Thanks