Title: Here Today
Word length: 9,086 words
Summary: They say all you need to fall for someone is being in the right place, the right time. But what if everytime you are, you can't see what's right before your eyes before it's too late? Oneshot AU.
Warnings: character death
Notes: So, I felt like writing Klaine. A big thanks to sexy Arizona (/~Arizonas) for her help and I hope you enjoy it.
It was snowing when Kurt first saw him. It could have been a sign, but he didn't care. He didn't even notice, actually. Kurt had too much in mind to notice what happened around him.
There was that naive plan he had to, one day, go to Broadway. It wasn't that he didn't have the talent – no. Kurt Hummel didn't have, in fact, the money. That explained why he studied on a community college and worked as much as he could at the little campus cafe. He tried to spend as little money as he could so, one day, he could move to New York.
And it wasn't just the plan itself that was naive. The boy himself was a very innocent person – he believed on the best of everybody else. He believed on second chances, and he believed that it would all be right at the end. If it wasn't right, it was because it wasn't the end.
Maybe that was why he was always so motivated to follow his dreams. He believed in the best. He believed in himself.
The thing is, on that day, while running the evening shift at the store, he crossed paths with one Blaine Anderson. It wasn't anything romantic or thrilling. It wasn't special in any terms, but it meant something for both of them. And, sometimes, that is enough.
The slightly shorter boy had had a hell of a day. Actually, that day had been the last straw of a hell of a week. He was just tired, irritated and extremely sad. So he went to that coffee shop without thinking, letting his feet control his body and mind.
Kurt was a little surprised to see a costumer at that time of the night. It was pretty late already, and he usually used the evenings to do some school work behind the counter. But he promptly got up and ready to take the order, expecting the other man just to order and go away, as it always is.
"Good evening, how can I help you?" he asked with his work voice, the phrase already mechanic on his tongue. His fingers tickled to quickly take the order and get back to homework.
"Can I ask you a question, Kurt Hummel?" he asked, ignoring Kurt's question. The taller boy quirked his eyebrows with confusion, but nodded nonetheless. "Do you believe in life after death?"
Kurt was, surely enough, surprised by that question. It was a strange thing to ask to a stranger, but Kurt found himself answering the man "No, I don't." It was simple, it was fast and it confused Blaine.
"Why?"
"I think that men are too scared of the unknown, thus they think there is something after death. Their fear makes them blind to see that death is something too different from life, and something that will be a big and unique adventure for all of us. Death is no life."
Blaine was a little taken aback by the brunette's answer. There weren't many who thought like that, and it made him a little mesmerized. It made a shadow of a smile creep at his mouth for the first time in weeks, if he could remember well.
Kurt, on the other hand, thought it was a little weird for a guy to come in and ask him such a polemic question out of the blue. And then stare at him so intensely. Yes, definitely creepy.
"Sir, do you want any coffees' suggestions? If you want to stay awake all night long, I highly recommend this Brazilian one, which is one of the strongest..." he babbled, trying to break the tension. The costumer, however, simply smiled a little and shook his head slowly.
"I've just found what I've been looking for" was all he said before he left.
Just later had Kurt asked himself how the man knew his name.
It was almost a month before Kurt saw him again. It was mid-December on that day, so he didn't need to work as much as he usually did, since most of the students were leaving to visit their families.
College was, too, on holidays. Which meant no homework for the next two weeks. Which meant that Kurt was bored as hell, with nothing to do on the desert cafe.
So he did what anyone would do in his situation: he listened to music. There is something about music that attracts most of the teenagers in the world, making them turn off from the real world a little. Kurt did it a lot, since his dream was to live from music. When a very moving song turned up, he suddenly had the idea to clean the tables. So that's what he was doing when Blaine walked in.
The curly haired boy wasn't expecting Kurt Hummel to be dancing around the shop. There was nothing he could do but lean on the door frame and stare, amused, at the scene in front of him.
When the brunette turned around and saw the familiar face staring at him, he couldn't do a thing but blush a crimson red and stare back. Because yes, the man had been a little weird and creepy on their encounter, but, after later analysis, Kurt couldn't help but feel a little intrigued.
"I think I want that Brazilian coffee you talked about" he said, after some time.
Kurt nodded quickly and went behind the counter without a word, making the coffee as quickly as possible. After pressing some buttons and adding some other things in it, he gave the cup to the stranger and smiled politely. He expected the man to leave right away, but instead he sat on one of the many vacant chairs and started messing with his mobile phone.
After sighing silently, Kurt turned on the store's stereo – he couldn't stand that tense silence any longer – and began cleaning all the equipments he used to make the coffee. After some silent minutes between the two only people in the cafe, Kurt finally remembered the question he wanted to ask.
"How did you know my name?"
The man – who had stopped using his phone and was simply laying back against the chair and drinking his coffee – simply blinked, a little confused, before answering "I'm sorry?", which made Kurt roll his eyes a little before elaborating his question.
"How did you know my name when you were last here? You said 'Kurt Hummel', and I am sure I had never seen you before" he said mechanically while still with his back to the other boy. When he heard a chuckle, however, he couldn't do a thing but turn and raise one of his eyebrows, questioning him silently.
"Your name tag, Kurt Hummel" he smiled sweetly, taking another sip from his coffee and still staring at Kurt. The taller boy, on the other hand, blushed furiously and was mentally slapping himself. How hadn't he thought of that?
"I have to go now" said the curly haired boy, heading to the door and giving a small wave before leaving Kurt there, staring at the door for at least one more minute before shaking his head and getting back to work.
When the end of his shift finally arrived and he was closing the doors, Kurt noticed that the man hasn't payed for the coffee.
"Dammit" he swore quietly before locking the entrance and walking home on the cold December night.
Working on a coffee place had it's benefits, Kurt thought while getting his black coffee from the cashier with a small nod. He headed to the main building, bobbing his head with the song he was listening to.
Since it was the beginning of a new semester, he had got new classes and new schedules and stuff. He wasn't used to waking up that early on a Monday to have a boring class, so he needed the caffeine badly.
When he took his seat, the cup was already empty and he already felt more awaken than before. He was, however, still a little sleepy, so he rubbed his eyes hardly to solve the problem.
"Sleeping problems, huh?" a smooth voice sounded by his side, making him jump because no one was there before. He turned his head quickly just to see the dark haired man there, looking at the board but smiling a little, as if to encourage Kurt to talk.
"Yeah, not used to this timetable yet" he yawned loudly, getting a grunt from the boy by his side in return. The class soon began and they tried to pay attention, but it had only been five minutes before Kurt whispered at the man besides him.
"Do you remember the last time you went to the cafe?" he asked and was answered with a nod "You forgot to pay" he chuckled lightly, turning back again to the board.
"Did I?" he asked with furrowed brows and Kurt nodded in return. "I'll pay you later" he whispered back, and that was that. They payed attention on class again and when that was over, they left, not looking back.
Kurt found out that he had Garfield's soul in him. Because Mondays were days made to be hated, and there was no way he was going to get used to it. His only solution was to become a coffee addicted and listen to some very loud music in the morning to keep himself awake.
"I'd never have guessed that you liked coffee that much" said his seat neighbor just to reaffirm his previous thoughts. He glared at him before rubbing his eyes, again an unsuccessful attempt not to sleep.
"You have yet to pay for that one you had last time, you know" he yawned, looking at the board even though the class hadn't begun yet.
"You are right, Kurt Hummel" he said absently, looking at the same direction as the taller boy.
"After all this time, I still don't know your name" he said, turning his head and facing the other boy, who laughed quietly and turned to Kurt with a warm smile.
"Yes, I guess you are right" he offered his hand for him to shake it "Please let me introduce myself." he said with a mocking British accent while Kurt took his hand "I'm Blaine Anderson"
Kurt giggled at this, which made Blaine furrow his brows in confusion "Anderson, as in Mister Anderson from Matrix?" he giggled again, finding that particular joke pretty funny. Blaine rolled his eyes, still smiling though.
"You are only jealous because I have the power to free us all from this fake world" he said, making Kurt chuckle again, before the class started, and both of them shut up for the rest of the hour.
"Well, hello, mister Anderson" were Kurt's usual first words to Blaine every morning. The other man would just snicker, or roll his eyes, or put his tongue out like a four years old. However, he would always have this spark in his eyes that told Kurt that yeah, Blaine was okay with the fact that Kurt was a nerd and played with his name. So he never stopped doing it.
Kurt threw himself, as usual, on the seat beside Blaine, and simply laid his head on the desk and closed his eyes. He didn't expect anything from the other man – they didn't talk much, just played around and made sarcastic comments with each other – ,so it took Kurt by surprise when he heard that smooth voice talking.
"Will you be at the cafe later today?" Blaine asked, not looking at Kurt, instead drawing random patterns on his notebook. Kurt popped his eyes open, studying Blaine for a moment before answering.
"Yeah"
"Will you be there with me?" he asked, still not facing the other boy.
"Um, yeah"
"Cool"
And that was their entire conversation before the class begun.
Later that day found Kurt humming a random song while cleaning the tables at the coffee place. Those damn morning classes made him wake up early – too early to stay fully awake on the night shifts. So he put on a metal band – which name he didn't quite remember – on the loudest volume, splashed some chilling water onto his face and drank the largest cup of black coffee before starting cleaning the coffee machines.
For the first time, Kurt wasn't surprised when Blaine appeared there, a somewhat smug grin planted on his face as he entered the place, spinning his keys between his fingers. Actually, Kurt was relieved – he planned on closing early that day and was just waiting Blaine before doing so.
He made his order, Kurt prepared it and he sat on the nearest booth. That was not unusual at all. Kurt smiled softly at Blaine before turning around and back to cleaning, the metal still on on the coffee place. Even though he didn't know the lyrics, he kept singing – sometimes shouting – along, making one Blaine Anderson very amused with the private show. So amused that, at a certain time, said Blaine Anderson laughed loudly at a face that Kurt made, leaving his already forgotten coffee on the table and joining the taller boy with the screams, the faces and the dance – which looked more like two drugged people moving their bodies abruptly than anything else.
When the song finished, both boys were breathless – Blaine was certain that he hadn't done that much exercise in his entire life – and still laughing their heads out. Kurt's cheeks were red, his eyes had tears and he was clutching his sides. Blaine just threw his head back and kept a firm hold on his knees, trying to support his weight as much as possible.
After a great amount of time, they recovered their breathing and each one was smiling stupidly at the other, a new spark in their eyes.
"How come every time I come here you are dancing around like a madman?" asked Blaine, raising an eyebrow and laughing a little at Kurt's expression.
"You've just ruined my good mood with that question. I hope you are happy" Kurt tried to say this serious, but failed miserably as he looked at the enormous smile the other was giving. So, through all his small lecture, he was mimicking it perfectly.
"Well, I'm always here to help" Blaine answered. Kurt grunted and turned back, moving to the wet cloth he left on one of the tables while cleaning it and getting back to work. Blaine furrowed his brows, wondering why the other boy was doing that. Wasn't he supposed to buy him coffee?
"Can't you drink with me?" he asked, his hazel eyes worried. Kurt chuckled, still rubbing the smooth surface in circles, not believing that the boy had only thought about that in that moment.
"In theory, I can't. After all, I am working. But yeah, I will drink coffee with you" he said, throwing the cloth at some place on his back and getting his water bottle before sitting across Blaine on the booth. The shorter boy raised an eyebrow, silently asking about the other's drink "I've had the biggest cup of black coffee just before you arrived. If I get any more caffeine in my system, I will only be able to sleep next week" Blaine chuckled, accepting it and staring at Kurt.
"So, mister Anderson, what do I owe the pleasure?" asked the taller boy, leaning back on the chair and taking a sip of the water. True, he liked company – it was better than homework and cleaning, after all –, but he had never expected to have it so frequently.
"Well, I was bored" he answered with a smirk, making Kurt stare coldly at him. "Where is your sense of humor? I'm kidding" he laughed. Kurt continued to stare coldly at him for some seconds before letting a small smile appear and, later on, laughing with Blaine.
"If your problem is boredom, being here won't make things any better" Kurt said after laughing a little more with the shorter boy, lifting one eyebrow and taking another sip from his water.
"At least I get free coffee" he shrugged, smirking wickedly while taking another gulp from his coffee.
"Man, I completely forgot that you didn't pay for that cup the other day. Hey!" he cried, standing up in a beat and staring at Blaine, who just continued smirking "You didn't pay for this one either. I am dealing with a thief right now" he said dramatically, hiding his face behind his hands while trying not to laugh. Again.
"You are so lucky I forgot my shotgun for this operation."
"Don't you dare mentioning weapons, mister Anderson" Kurt whispered, peeking out from the space between his fingers and looking at Blaine "I have pepper spray behind the counter, and I am not afraid of using it."
"Please no, have mercy. You can call the cops on me, but no pepper spray." the shorter boy said sarcastically, smiling at Kurt while lifting himself from the chair and walking slowly towards the other man.
"There is a simple solution for all this trouble that doesn't involve any form of harm, you see" the chestnut haired boy said, looking down at the shorter boy, who lifted his eyebrows for him to continue "You could pay."
"But where is the fun in this? Nah, I refuse to pay" Blaine shook his head.
Kurt sighed dramatically, liking very much this little game they were playing "Well, I have no other choice but calling the cops. Or using my deadly sprays."
"I've got another solution" the hazel eyed boy smiled.
"Which is?"
"I could buy you dinner."
"You spent the whole evening coming up with all this, didn't you?" Kurt smiled, which made Blaine smile in return and his hazel eyes shone with happiness.
"Definitely."
When Blaine said that he was buying Kurt dinner, Kurt expected something romantic, yes. A bistro, a Italian restaurant with a secluded area where they could joke and do whatever they felt like doing.
Hell, even a McDonald's had crossed Kurt's mind, but not that. Definitely not that.
Still, it was better than what he hoped it to be.
As everything about them, it all started at the coffee shop. Kurt had talked to his boss and managed to get an earlier shift. Blaine arrived while Kurt cleaned the coffee machine ("I am serious, you have something with this thing. You clean it all the time!") and, fifteen minutes later, Kurt was coming out from the bathroom, having changed from his uniform into something normal and comfortable.
"So" Blaine began while they crossed the parking lot side by side "I've came to the conclusion that two cups of coffee aren't as expensive as a dinner at a restaurant."
Kurt stopped dead on tracks, glancing at Blaine with raised eyebrows, the other noticing that his partner wasn't by his side some steps ahead. He turned and smiled at Kurt, who could only smile a little and say "You've got to be kidding me."
"What?" Blaine said, taking quick steps and standing in front of Kurt "I will still pay you dinner, but we won't stay in some freaking expensive restaurant." Kurt threw his head back, sighing heavily.
"I wonder if I will ever get used to you" he muttered and began walking again, Blaine still at his side "Actually, I wonder if you will ever stop being weird." Blaine laughed at that.
"You think I am weird?" he asked rhetorically, and Kurt only rolled his eyes and smiled a little at him.
So that was how they found themselves at Blaine's apartment, two boxes of pizza on the coffee table while they talked with each other and had a good time altogether. First they talked about how weird it was for Blaine, who was almost 20, to have a hamster and name him Hamtaro. Then Blaine, being fake hurt, tried to find something humiliating about Kurt for payback, and literally interviewed him for his whole life story.
At the end, he chose that the whole "I threw up at the school's counselor and she had freaking OCD" story was the best he would get, and would he make fun of Kurt with it.
They both had a nice time, all in all. But, in the end, it was over, and Blaine was leaving Kurt in front of his dorm. They shared one last smile, one goodbye and Kurt got out, leaving Blaine on the parking lot, making sure he made it safe.
Blaine sighed and turned his car on, going back home.
There were pros and cons in living in your own apartment. Sure, he didn't have any annoying roommate, and yeah, he had his privacy, but there was one thing he hated about it.
Doing the groceries.
Blaine had never done the groceries before moving in alone. It was always his mother, or his father, or any other person but him. But then he had to buy those stuff. And he didn't know how to do that – somehow, he always bought the worst fruits and vegetables, and the frozen food packages would always be open. Maybe it was karma.
And then he had to choose between two brands that he had never heard of, always buying the one that turned out to be the worst one. And it took freaking hours to buy it all, always managing to make Blaine get in a worst mood than before.
So it was a statement to say that he hated groceries.
While doing it on a Wednesday morning – the only day he didn't have classes so early –, the only thing he could think about was the exquisite dose of caffeine he was growing so used to. An small smile appeared on his face without him noticing, too distracted on his own thoughts to care.
With only the need to get coffee in his mind – and nothing else, of course – ,Blaine left the shopping cart at the middle of the aisle and made his way to the parking lot. Groceries could wait.
"Kurt, can I see you in my office?" a grave voice came from behind Kurt. He looked over his shoulder, seeing his fat and greasy boss giving him a stern look, his forehead as sweaty as ever. He nodded briefly, first finishing the coffee he had in hands before slowly walking into the room.
What had he done? Maybe his boss thought he was a lazy worker, or maybe he burned another costumer's coffee without noticing. It wasn't his fault though, the coffee machine was sort of old and... maybe he didn't clean the coffee machine well enough. He squeezed his own hands firmly, trying to get a grip on himself. After all, Blaine said that he cleaned the damn thing every time he came to the cafe and...
Kurt stopped dead in tracks before continuing the path. His boss knew about the coffees that Blaine didn't pay, it had to be it. He slapped himself mentally, regretting the stupidity of his own acts. He had no right to give free coffee to people, no wonder his boss was going to fire him.
Or call the cops.
When Kurt finally sat on the uncomfortable wooden chair in front of his boss, he was almost as sweaty as the other man out of nervousness. His boss was sitting in front of him, fingers together in front of his face and eyes his small eyes were squeezed.
"Do you remember when I hired you?" the man asked. Kurt furrowed his brow a little at the question, but nodded nonetheless. "I do, too. I remember as it was yesterday. You came here, nervous and excited as ever, and I couldn't understand how a person could be so giddy about getting a job in a cafe. Your good mood got you the job." the man smiled a little, staring at Kurt. He gulped, still nervous, waiting for the man to continue.
"I thought you were going to lose all your excitement when you started working. But, somehow, you didn't. I got curious about it and asked the manager if he knew why. He said you mentioned something about going to New York, and that this was the first step. You are a bright kid, Kurt, and you don't belong here." his boss smiled, making Kurt smile in return.
"I appreciate it all, sir. It was indeed a bless, getting a job here." Kurt replied, a little relieved but still nervous "But may I ask what is your angle, sir?"
"My angle, Kurt, is that Harry, the manager, is quitting, something about having to study more. I want you to be the new manager, Kurt" the man smiled full of teeth at the sight of the surprised boy "And I want you to save this money for your big New York dream."
Kurt stood there, open mouthed at the news, for at least five more seconds before realizing that he needed to say something. "Oh my... Yes! Of course yes! Thank you sir, thank you so much!" Kurt jumped, shaking the man's hand excitedly "This is perfect, now I just have to work until June and than it's New York. Thank you sir, thank you so much. I swear you won't regret this decision" he shook the man's hand again, smiling widely and practically jumping out of excitement.
"Okay Kurt, that's enough" he laughed, guiding his employer to the door "You start your new shift next week. Make sure to take your new timetable with Harry later." he said, closing the door briefly after, leaving the tall man to go back to work, as giddy and excited as ever.
He spent the rest of the morning making coffees – he got pretty good tips for his good mood, which were still consequence of the news he had gotten earlier that morning – and daydreaming about the future. His future on Broadway, living in a city that accepted and reflected himself. At some point, his cheeks started hurting for smiling too much, but he didn't care. He was almost there.
They were full – being a Wednesday morning, it was kind of usual –, so Kurt had a good excuse for not noticing Blaine in the line. "Welcome sir, can I take your... oh, hi Blaine." his smile widened at the sight of the man in front of him "Hey, I have great news I'd like to share, could you hang out somewhere here for the next half hour?" Kurt asked.
"That was the plan" the dark haired man said, smiling at Kurt's smile "Can I have a medium drip in the meantime, though?"
"Oh, sure" Kurt pressed some buttons on the machine, telling Blaine the price for his beverage "This time you'll have to pay, though." he winked, looking behind his shoulder to tell the order to the person who was making the coffees. When he turned back, though, Blaine was already away, waiting for his coffee at the other side of the counter. Kurt glared daggers at him, which only resulted in Blaine giving him a sweet smile and winking back.
Like promised, half an hour later Kurt was taking his apron off, smiling at the cashier that took the next shift and taking his own coffee, moving to the table Blaine was sitting in. Or sleeping on, actually, because the curly haired man was literally drooling on the table, having slept on it. Kurt giggled softly, shaking his head at the cuteness of his friend.
But he was way too excited to tell him the good news, so he mercilessly shook his shoulders and said "Hey Blaine, wake up you idiot", joking a little because hey, they were friends, they could do that.
Blaine stirred and opened his eyes to look at Kurt, who was nearly laughing – he was in a good mood, after all – before turning his head to the other side and mumbling something incoherently, which just made Kurt laugh harder.
"Oh come on, Blainey, I have good news I want to share with my best friend" he shook Blaine more, but it wasn't necessary. Blaine lifted his head as soon as Kurt finished his sentence, looking directly at his eyes for a few seconds. It made Kurt uneasy, but it was soon over and Blaine was his usual irritating self again.
"You should have said that sooner" he smiled goofily, gesturing for Kurt to sit down next to him on the booth "So, what is this all about? It has to be something good, you can barely stop jumping".
"Oh, believe me, it is good" Kurt answered, a mischievous grin occupying his face. He sat down opposite to Blaine, stealing his coffee to take a gulp – which resulted on Blaine mumbling something between the lines Kurt just taking advantage of him and the former rolling his eyes at his friend's immaturity – and fixating his eyes on Blaine's hazel ones.
"Harry, the manager, is quitting to focus more on university." Kurt said seriously, a grin slowly growing on his face "And since I have got the best bossy attitude ever..."
"You got promoted?" Blaine interrupted, joy showing on his face. Kurt just nodded, his smile so big that it could rip his face in two. "Oh my God, Kurt!" Blaine said, lifting himself up and dragging Kurt with him, giving the boy a huge hug, which was promptly responded. "I am so proud of you" Blaine's voice was muffled by the other boy's shoulder, but Kurt heard him.
Kurt was about to tell his friend about New York, about him leaving in a few months to follow his Broadway dreams. But he couldn't. It wasn't that he didn't want to share that with Blaine – no, it wasn't that at all. Blaine was his best friend, he wanted to share the world with him. No, what kept Kurt for telling Blaine was his happiness. How would the other boy react about him leaving?
So Kurt didn't say a word, only hugged the smaller boy tighter. And he didn't let go for several minutes.
Soon spring came. The days were hotter, the sun was shining more, the flowers were making the views happier and all that jazz. It was normal for people to get more cheerful when this time of the year arrived, and Blaine was like that.
Kurt didn't know when Blaine got like that. While old Blaine behaved like any normal person – besides the habit of stealing coffee, of course –, new Blaine was happier. Giddier. It wasn't bad by any means, of course not. Kurt kind of liked it very much.
The other day, for example, when they were walking together from the cafe to class, Kurt tripped and let his precious black coffee fall. He started freaking out – after all, he couldn't survive the morning classes without coffee – when Blaine offered for them to share his latte. Kurt blushed at that, but accepted the offer with a big smile.
Then there was that time when they went to TGI Friday's on a Saturday. It was a new habit of theirs, going to a restaurant every weekend together, just the two of them. Even though they saw each other every day, they always had something to talk about.
They spent the entire dinner telling funny stories or jokes at each other. Some were terrible, but they were having such a good time that they would laugh at anything. Both of them were so drunk from the gleeful atmosphere that they ended up being more intimate than before. At the end of the night, when Kurt dropped Blaine off at his building, the shorter boy quickly got a hold of Kurt and hugged the crap out of him. After giving himself some moments to be confused, Kurt hugged Blaine just as fiercely.
That night, Kurt stopped to think. And he realized that he was falling for Blaine.
Sure, someone else would have found that terrific. People tend to like being on a relationship, that's why there were so many couples out there. Kurt briefly thought about some of his beloved musicals that always had that happy ending.
But Kurt wasn't happy with that knowledge. He wanted to, no, needed to go to New York. It had been his dream when he and his mother would watch different shows on the television and she would babble about the amazing story lines, songs and cast. It had been his dream when he came out; going to a big city with much less homophobia to deal with.
Resuming, Kurt had been dreaming with that for a long time. He wouldn't let a crush stop him from going to the big apple. He couldn't.
And if the feelings were shared? After all, Blaine was the one that initiated that whole new step on their relationship. Even though the knowledge gave him butterflies in his belly, he couldn't make Blaine suffer like that when nothing would ever go on between them. It was cruel, and Blaine didn't deserve that at all and, for fuck's sake, Blaine didn't even know that Kurt was leaving!
Classes would be over in a month, so Kurt decided what he had to do. He would tell Blaine everything on the next day. He truly hoped that his friend would understand but, if he didn't, he had a whole month to think about it all. Kurt would understand if he didn't, though. But he hoped Blaine would. If he couldn't have Blaine as something more, he still wanted him to be his friend.
Actually, he didn't want it. He needed it.
So the next day, Kurt was waiting Blaine at the cafe as usual. He was pacing impatiently, getting more nervous as the minutes passed. What if Blaine wouldn't come? What if he came and ignored Kurt? He knew both options were ridiculous, but he was impatient.
And then Blaine walked through the doors, saw Kurt and waved, heading on his direction. Kurt took a deep breath, speaking mentally his speech again, as he did the whole night.
"Hey Kurt, how are you?" Blaine asked, giving him a hug before taking Kurt's place on the line. Usually, Kurt would have made a sarcastic remark, or simply pushed Blaine from his place, but that day was different.
"Blaine, would you mind skipping class with me today? It's kind of important" Kurt silently said, never looking at Blaine on the eyes, instead staring at the ground as if it was the most amazing thing on the world.
"Yes, sure. Are you okay, Kurt?" Kurt could hear the worry on Blaine's voice. It hurt his heart a little, knowing that Blaine worried about him.
"No. I have to talk to you"
After that, they were silent. Blaine would keep shooting Kurt worried glances, which were completely ignored by the taller boy. They ordered their coffees, waited for them and, instead of going through the door, Kurt guided Blaine to the farthest booth at the shop. He slid on one side, feeling Blaine slide right beside him.
"What happened, Kurt?" he asked silently, gently picking Kurt's hand up and intertwining their fingers. He heard the taller boy take a deep breath before his gentle voice started speaking quietly.
"Please don't interrupt me until I'm finished, I've been practicing this." Blaine nodded, squeezing the taller man's hand. Kurt took a deep breath, finally looking at the other right on his eyes, not glancing back "Do you remember when I told you about my promotion?" Blaine nodded and he continued "Well, I was happy, you've noticed. But not why you thought I was. Yes, it is nice to be recognized at your work place and stuff, but I was happy about it because of the money. I need this money, Blaine, because it made things easier for me. With me being a manager, moving will be faster."
"Moving?" Blaine interrupted even though Kurt asked not to.
"Yes. I am going to New York." Kurt said, giving a half smile at his friend because he was almost there, almost making his dream come true. Blaine nodded, letting go of Kurt's hand to put both of his on his lap, looking at them thoughtfully. They were silent for a moment, Kurt biting his lip nervously, trying to guess what Blaine was thinking.
"When?" the voice was so small that it could have gone unnoticed, but Kurt heard it.
"At the end of the month" Kurt said just as low, expecting Blaine to maintain the silence, but it didn't go that way.
"WHAT? AND YOU TELL ME JUST NOW?" Blaine cried, making some people glance angrily at them.
"I wanted to tell you sooner but you were so happy and..."
"And then you thought it would be better to wait until the last minute, wasn't it?"
"NO, of course not! I wanted to share this with you, I really did! But I knew you would be a little upset at the beginning..."
"A little upset? A LITTLE? Kurt, for fuck's sake, I trusted you!"
"And why don't you trust me anymore, huh? I didn't tell you sooner because I was worried about you, not because I don't care about you! And why the hell aren't you proud of me? This is my dream, Blaine, and you are throwing it on my face like it is something bad!" Kurt started getting angry. He didn't understand why Blaine was being such a bitch about it.
"I am not throwing your fucking dream at your face. I am mad because you are leaving and I didn't know!"
"Blaine, I will still visit here. And we can skype or send messages or..."
"NO, KURT, IT WON'T BE THE SAME! You are leaving me, Kurt. You are leaving us. But I shouldn't be surprised, should I, best friend?" he spat the word like it was venom.
"What the hell are you talking about?" Kurt asked, astonished. Blaine gave a humorless, bitter laugh before continuing.
"Really, Kurt? All those times we went out, the flirting, everything, and I am your friend?"
"But, are you saying that... that you like me?" the thought was so alien, so impossible that even though Kurt liked Blaine, he never would have thought that Blaine felt the same way.
But he didn't.
"I don't like you, Kurt Hummel." although the words made Kurt's heart clench a little, Blaine's tone wasn't bitter anymore – it was warm and intimate, which made the taller boy captivated by every word that emanated from his mouth "Yes, I had liked you when I first walked in here and saw those damn eyes of yours concentrated in your homework. I had liked you when you first gave me a hard time about stealing coffee. I had liked you when you sat next to me those countless times in class and we would trade jokes like old friends. I had liked you then, Kurt, but not now." Blaine shook his head, letting his eyes fall on his lap before looking at Kurt intensely again "Nowadays, I love you."
Kurt's jaw fell open and he couldn't find the strength on himself to close it. Blaine loved him. How could he? Kurt wasn't perfect; he wasn't nice, or pretty, or smart. And there sat that man, who was perfect – too perfect, actually – telling him that he loved him. He didn't know how to feel, though. This made everything else so much harder.
Blaine took Kurt's silence in the wrong way. He suddenly lifted himself from the booth, an hurt expression on his face, and stared at Kurt "But what could this mean to you, right? You will leave me, just like everyone else in my life" Blaine's eyes stung with tears, but he refused to cry. Instead, he quietly said "I hope your future will be the way you dreamed it to be", a shadow of a smile appearing on his lips and he left the coffee shop.
Kurt's eyes were, too, full of tears. Blaine left. He rested his head on his hands and groaned, finally letting the tears break free.
He had screwed this up, hadn't he?
Kurt phoned, texted, emailed, sent facebook messages and tried to talk to Blaine in every way he could on the next couple of days. He felt horrible, leaving things the way he had. But his friend would never answer or acknowledge him, which made everything harder.
In the end, Kurt decided that Blaine should have his time, thinking about what happened and how he felt about it. It was for the best, even though he wanted to hug him whenever he saw Blaine on the single class they shared.
Blaine, on the other hand, was even more miserable than Kurt. While his blue eyed friend had the moving to distract himself, Blaine didn't have anything. He caught himself thinking of Kurt constantly, missing their weekend meeting, their coffee dates and weird conversations. But mostly, he missed Kurt himself. His laugh, his eyes, his voice, his smile. He missed him.
But that wasn't enough for Blaine to apologize. Kurt was leaving and he hadn't told Blaine. It made him mad when he found out about it, but now it just feels like a rock on his stomach. And besides, Kurt was right; he shouldn't have yelled at him. After all, he hadn't done anything wrong, he was just following his dream.
And it wasn't until the last week before Kurt moved that Blaine decided that he couldn't leave things like they were. He missed Kurt too much and it would be worse for both of them if they didn't talk about everything before the big day.
So, with a unidentified feeling on the pit of his stomach, Blaine took his cellphone and called Kurt.
"H'llo?" Kurt answered his phone. It was still 4pm, but with packing and all the bureaucracy he had to sort out for moving to another state, he was tired. He yawned, scratching his right eye with one hand, the other holding his phone to his ear.
"Kurt?"
"Blaine?" Kurt sat straighter, suddenly very awake.
"Yeah, it's me. How... how are you?" Blaine asked, his voice a little muffled.
"I- I'm fine. And you?"
"I'm not, actually. I miss you." He said the last part quietly, making Kurt's eyes water a little.
"I miss you too. And Blaine, as overwhelmed as you were feeling that day on the coffee shop, you shouldn't have ran away, nor ignored my calls."
"I know, and I'm so sorry. I just – I just needed some time to think about things" Blaine said quickly, making them fall into an awkward silence.
"So, I just..."
"I wanted to..." they said at the same time, both laughing a little after that.
"You go first, Blaine"
"I wanted you to know that I am sorry. It wasn't my place to yell at you like that, I was just stressed out. I don't want you to leave with all that tension between us. I really care about you, Kurt, and I don't want a stupid fight to end our friendship."
"I don't want that to happen, either."
"So do you think we could meet? Anytime, anywhere, your choice."
Kurt smiled, his heart warming up a little bit with Blaine's happy tone "I actually have some finals this week, but we could go out Saturday like we used to."
"Okay, I'll see you the-"
"Actually," Kurt said quickly "I sold my car to help me with the rent of my flat at New York. Would you mind picking me up? You drive, I pay."
"Okay. I'll be there at six, is it good for you?" Kurt could almost hear the smile on Blaine's voice, could imagine his friend jumping a little with excitement. He smiled, too, all wide and showing his teeth.
"It's a date."
Kurt was excited about Saturday. He woke up early, around 8am, and had to stop himself from jumping excitedly on his bed. He quickly put something on – jeans and a random shirt he had – and went to get coffee on the campus. He walked pacifically, thinking through the entire route, a small smile playing on his lips.
Yes, he was sure he had feelings for Blaine by now. If the butterflies he felt in his stomach weren't enough proof, the time they spent away and how much Kurt suffered with it were. And maybe, if things went right tonight, he could get a boyfriend out of all this. Kurt was, after all, a hopeless romantic, and if he had any chance of having a relationship, he hoped for it to happen.
He bought his usual latte and a bagel, sitting on a table and getting his phone out of his pocket, playing angry birds while eating his breakfast. He soon finished, though, and went to his dorm again, hoping to find something distracting to do until six 'o clock.
He didn't have such luck, though. In the end, Kurt spent his entire day choosing an outfit for later, only finishing his search at 5pm. Realizing that he was kind of late, Kurt hurried to take a shower, but all the stalls were already occupied.
He sighed to himself, irritated, and began to pace, waiting for the showers to get vacant. He had to wait twenty minutes for it to happen, though, getting Kurt way more stressed than he already was.
Twenty five minutes later he was back on his room, trying to dress up as quick as he could, but without succeeding. He sent Blaine a text saying that he was a little late on schedule and went back to get ready.
At last he was finally ready. Even though he ended up being late – it was 6:10pm when he finished everything –, Blaine wasn't there yet. So he sighed happily, flopping down on his bed to wait.
The sun was what woke Kurt up. He stirred a little, realizing that he was rather uncomfortable. Wearing jeans to sleep wasn't his wisest idea, and he wasn't even with his head on a freaking pillow. He opened his eyes, lazily taking his jeans off to go back to sleep while trying to reach for a pillow at the same time.
And then he realized that he shouldn't have slept with those clothes on. Those were his date clothes and he should have gone to a date the night before, not slept with it on.
Kurt sat up slowly, absorbing the facts. Blaine had stood him up. Sweet Blaine, who had never been rude with him, never disrespected him, stood him up. He got up and turned on his phone, expecting an apologize text there, but there was nothing from Blaine, just some random number. Unwanted tears began to fall down his face and he took a pillow to shout into it, his rage coming into view.
Kurt was a very innocent person. He believed on the best of people. But, when you are like that on this world, sometimes you get crushed. And that was how Kurt felt. Betrayed by someone he trusted.
But he wouldn't let things end like this. He was determined to give Blaine a piece of his mind. So, even thought it was only around 6am, he took his phone and angrily called Blaine's number.
After the third ring the phone was picked up, and Kurt didn't even give him time to say "hello", because he was already shouting "What the HELL, Blaine! I can't believe you stood me up! I would have understood if you had called to cancel, you know. I had never thought you could do that to me. I thought you said you lo-"
Kurt stopped talking, listening to the voice on the other side of the phone. As time passed, his face became paler, his eyes wide and he sat slowly on his bed again.
"What?" he asked quietly.
The taxi ride was painfully slow and quiet. Kurt couldn't stop fidgeting with the sleeve of his shirt and looking out the window, wondering how much more time it would take until they got there. The cab smelled like pee and smoke and he was sure the driver hasn't had a shower for some time now, but he didn't care.
Finally, they arrived. Kurt gave the man fifty bucks, even though it wasn't that expensive. He strode to the door with large paces; not running nor walking, but going fast enough. He still didn't believe that that was happening – he didn't want to believe. But when he saw the nurse there, he knew it was happening.
"Mister Kurt Hummel?" she asked. He nodded once, blinking a little to try to make the tears go away. She gave him a sympathetic look before turning around, guiding the way. They went through some hallways, went down some stairs and walked a lot, but Kurt wasn't paying attention.
At last, they entered a large room. The woman walked forward, talking quickly at the same time "you were his emergency contact, but we couldn't reach you. It was a good thing you called, because we need someone to identify the body" she finished, opening a certain silver drawer.
"Yes" Kurt's voice cracked, blinking furiously again "That's Blaine."
The woman nodded, writing something on a file and looking extremely serious. "He was ran over by a car early last night. The driver testified and said that" she looked at the file again "Blaine wasn't looking while crossing the street, having been texting at the time." The woman looked up at Kurt then, her expression softening "I suppose you want to have some alone time with him". He nodded once, not taking his eyes off Blaine. She left the room silently after that.
Blaine's eyes were open. His iris were still the same hazel colour Kurt knew, but they weren't the same. Kurt had seen a lot of emotions once filling those eyes – happiness, sadness and many others – and each one of them gave a special light to those beautiful irises. But now they were empty.
Kurt took his eyes off Blaine's, instead looking at the rest of his body. He could easily see where he was hit – there was some blood on the left part of his face and his right leg was on a very weird position. But other than that, he looked normal. His clothes were very well put together and Kurt wondered – with a painful stab on his chest – if Blaine was reading his text when everything happened.
The tears were falling freely now, but Kurt didn't care. He took Blaine's hand on his, but it was deadly cold. He didn't want to acknowledge that, didn't want to remember that the boy in front of him wasn't alive anymore.
He still held his hand though, and looked up at Blaine's face again. His empty eyes were there, reminding Kurt that no emotions would fill them ever again. He took his other hand and lifted it to Blaine's face slowly. He was trembling a lot, but managed to softly touch Blaine's cheek and hold it there, like if he was caressing him.
"I love you too" he said quietly. Even though he was dead, Kurt could swear Blaine's eyes were staring into him. He took his hand out of the dead boy's one, using it to close them one at a time.
"Now it looks like you are sleeping" Kurt said quietly, slowly turning around and leaving the room.
Kurt secretly hoped that he was having a nice dream.