The City Council today has issued a complete ban on all usage of the word...

I am unable to say what the word is, as doing so would be a violation of the ban. Nevertheless, the City Council have stated that from today, the word may not be used in any circumstances, including but not limited to: polite conversation, emergency warning signs, philosophical ruminations on the role of tractors in our lives, chanting, epitaphs, economic forecasts, shampoo instructions or inner monologues; and believe me, they'll know. It should be safe to use the word in software EULA conditions because, seriously, who reads those?

Failure to obey this ban will result in a fair trial and indefinite detention.

Now folks, I understand it may be difficult to avoid a word that you do not know. And despite seeing the word before me in this press release, written by someone who I assume is undergoing his or her fair trial at this very moment, I, of course, cannot tell you what it is.

However, there is nothing to say I cannot give vague hints as to what the word is; this word that you should all valiantly strive to avoid using, being in contact with or allowing to enter your head. For while the decisions of the City Council are always in our best interests, and should be fully obeyed with without questioning or informed debate; my role in community radio gives me a responsibility to ensure that my loyal listeners have at least some chance in avoiding permanent incarceration.

So listen carefully dear listeners, and see if you can glean the word I am inferring, but not clearly stating:

First, think of the colour pink, then, do not!

Secondly, imagine being at the corner of a mildly busy intersection, the wind whips the light rain in your face, you try to remember if you left the oven on. That feeling of uncertainty, that lingering indecision.

Then, look up the word between eat and eccentric in your dictionary.
If there is more than one word between those words, you clearly have a different dictionary to I.

I think I have said enough.

One final word: Do not worry about accidentally writing down the banned word, for if you are writing anything at all you are already breaking the Council's ban on writing instruments and will be incarcerated regardless of whether the banned word is one of the things you write down...

...although, if you did, I can't imagine it would help.