dis is 4 my homegirl lucy i hope u lik it guuurl.

"Hi simon," jace giggled looking into simons beautiful eyes but at the same time blushing and looking away.

"Come here vampire I want to suck your blood" simon growled and flung jace aggressively against the wall.

"Simon we can't.. we're both boys" jace explained but secretly he wanted to do this because simon was sexy and he wanted simon to suck his blood.

"i know i'm supposed to be straight but... your hair, your eyes... I WANT YOU, JACE" and then simon wraps jaces legs arund him and throws him on the bed and starts grinding his cock and sucking his blood.

"I'M NOT GAY!" jace yells angrily but longingly at the same time while dry humping simon the bed "WHAT ABOUT CLARY?"

"dude I don't care. now fuck me u sexy beast."

"I AM A LION. A STRONG, MASCULINE, STRAIGHT LION WHO LIKS CHIX. I AM IN LOVE WITH A LAMB AND I AM A LION." Jace continues while taking his clothes off and he looks at simons cok it is big and hairy but jace can tell its very juicy.

"I don't care" simon growls staring into jace's beautiful tawny eyes "I want you up me you lion"

Jace then put his thingy magiggy up Simons azz while he thuches his man-watermelons. Simon sucksed hise coks and he moaned "AAAHHHHHH"

Then they switch places because simon is the dominating one so he clibs on top of jace and starts humping him but then alec walks in and its awkward.

"what r u doing" alec aks but secretly hes turned on "can I join in?"

"okay come over here lightwood" simon nods but before they can get started clary walks in

"jace water you doing I thought u were my lion and I was your lamb"

"clary im sorry but im gay" jace says regretfully but happily at the sametime and clary shrugs and says

"okay I think I luv izzy anyway im going to go have sexc with her" then clary leaves

"that's nice good for them" simon says and then he has sexc with alec and jace and then magnus joins in and jace sux simons coks and it is nice and juicy just like he thought it would be.

"i luv you simon," jace pants wen their done

"i love me too" simon winks and jace larfs becuz simon is funny

"oh simon u are one hilarious motherfucker" jace sighs contently and then he goes and eats a banana.

I am very, very sorry for what you just read. Feel free to burn your eyes.

(And please, please know that this was 100% a joke).

This is to 'CLARY AND JACE FTW1' (Thanks for being anon by the way, this just means that everyone can see what I'm about to say, not just you. Not a great move, huh sweetheart?)

I do not think I'm 'fucking hilarious', it was just a joke, calm your tits. Also, if you don't ship Simon/Jace, why did you look up S/J M rated slash stories? Because M rated stories don't appear on the archive unless you search for them, darling :)

And babe, it's a parody. I'm not making fun of any story in particular, I'm just taking all the clichés that appear in most of them and turning it into a terrible story. And for the love of God, NOT EVERYONE SHIPS CLARY/JACE. I actually hate that pairing with a burning passion, and it's because of cockhead shippers like you who go around saying how fucking great you are and how fucking great your ship is and OMGZ!1 IF U DONT SHIP CLARY JACE GET OUT OF THE FANDOM CLARY AND JACE R MENT 2 BE. shut. the fuck. up. Nobody cares except for you. The only real couple? Alec and Magnus say hello. Also, it's not a show, it's a book series?

I am not going to write fucking Jace/Clary smut for the love of God shut your fucking face.