Disclaimer: Of course I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! I'm not as awesome as Kazuki Takahashi!

Malik happily walked the streets of Domino with his darker half to his best friend Ryou's apartment.

"Hikariiii." Marik groaned rubbing his eyes. "10 am is too early to be out!"

Malik just shook his head. "Oh be quiet. We're here already."

The two Egyptians walked into the apartment complex and were greeted by the doorman.

"Good morning!" the doorman chimed cheerfully.

"Good morning?!" Marik shouted back at him. "This is anything but a good morning. A good morning is a morning when you can sleep in... and I had to wake up at an ungodly hour just so Malik-chan here, could visit his fluffy haired best friend!"

"Marik! That's enough. And don't call me Malik-chan, you know I hate that!" Malik yelled flustered.

"Shut up Hikari, I'm not finished with him." Marik shot back. He seized Malik's wrist and pulled him forward, throwing him off balance. He then took this opportunity to snatch the millennium rod from his belt loop.

"Marik give that back now!" Malik demanded now realizing what Marik intended to do.

"This will only take a second.." Marik said now walking torwards the doorman pointing the millennium rod at him.

The doorman was now shaking in fear. "I'm s-s-orry sir!"

"Yeah, you're gonna be." Marik said grinning evilly, then breaking into a bustle of maniacal laughter as the millennium rod was glowing a blinding golden light.

Malik sighed and put his palm to his face.

Malik and Marik were now walking down the hallway of the apartment.

"I can't believe you sent that poor man to the shadow realm just for saying good morning." Malik said disgruntled.

"Really?" Marik said smirking.

"...nevermind. Maybe I can believe it." Malik sighed. They finally arrived at Ryou's apartment door. Malik knocked on the door lightly.

"Hikari, no one is going to hear that. Let me show you how to knock." Marik said pushing Malik out of the way. Marik stood back, then put all of his power into his fist and swung his arm towards the door. Just as he was about to hit the door, it opened, and he ended up punching Bakura right on his upper lip, causing it to bleed.

Malik gasped. "Bakura are you okay?!"

Bakura growled. He used his tounge to lick up the blood flowing from his upperlip. "Marik, you're dead."

Marik just cackled. "Tomb robber, you look so ridiculous!"

"I'll show you ridiculous, you damned tomb keeper!" Bakura shouted.

Just as he was about to attack Marik, Ryou appeared. "Bakura? Who is at the door?" he gently pushed past his yami who was blocking the entrance. "Oh Malik, Marik! Good to see you please come in."

"Don't mind if I do!" Marik smirked and walked arrogantly past Bakura.

Bakura grabbed his shoulder and snatched him back. "You're not getting off that easy you bastard."

"Oh really, and what prey tell will you do?" Marik asked with a cocky tone.

"A shadow game. Now." Bakura said crossing his arms.

Marik smirked. "As much as I love shadow games, I didn't bring my deck if you hadn't noticed."

"That's fine, the game doesn't have to be duel monsters you know. We're going to play a shadow RPG." Bakura grinned evily.

"Sounds fun. Let's do it!" Marik declared as he and Bakura made their way into the game room.

Ryou saw Bakura and Marik pass by as the took off for the game room. "Bakura! Don't turn anyone into a RPG figure!"

"No promises Hikari." Bakura grinned bearing his two animalistic fangs, then shut the door behind them.

Ryou sighed. "I just don't know what to do with my yami. He is so much trouble!"

Ryou set a cup of tea in front of Malik and sat down beside him.

Malik took a sip of tea. "Bakura can't be any worse than my yami! By the way, your doorman currently resides in the shadow realm... courtesy of Marik."

"Bakura has done much worse things, so don't worry about it." Ryou said taking a gulp of tea.

"Oh, like what?" Marik asked.

"Well... Bakura gave me a shirt for my birthday last year." Ryou sighed.

"That was nice of him." Marik said smiling.

"Uh... not really, it belonged to the old man across the hall.. and he threatened to kill him if he didn't hand it over, ...and then he had a heart attack.... and died." Ryou muttered.

"Oh. Well, about three months ago, Marik was bored one night, and he had found a pair of scissors it seemed Isis forgot to hide. He snuck into my bedroom while I was sleeping... and cut holes into my pants."

"That's not so bad.. holes in pants are very fashionable now." Ryou said looking on the brightside.

"....it was all my pants. And the holes were cut on the crotch part... and I had to wear them until Isis bought me new ones!" Malik said stirring his tea with the spoon furiously.

"Well, once when I took Bakura to the mall, we were shopping for clothes, and we passed by the women's undergarments... and he told the employee I was a young woman who didn't know her bust size and she believed him and brought out the measuring tape! It was so embarassing!" Ryou said blushing as he thought about it.

"That's nothing compared to my yami! A few days ago, I took him to the grocery store, and he has snatched my millennium rod from my belt loop, and used mind control to make me come on to the gay cashier. And now, he won't quit calling me!" Malik exclaimed.

"Still, it's not as bad as Bakura! In fact, when I was cooking dinner a few months ago.."

**

*flashback*

Ryou's POV

I looked at the recipe list I had laid out in front of me. "Okay, I need to chop two large onions."

I took out the cutting board and put the two onions on top and began to slice them. The fumes from the onions caused me to get teary eyed.

"Ah!" I exclaimed. I sliced open the tip of my finger. "How clumsy of me. I'll just get a bandage."

As I made my way down the hallway torward the bathroom to get one, I heard the shower running so I knocked on the door. " 'Kura? Can I come in?"

"You want to get in the shower with me Hikari? I never knew you were so kinky!" Bakura said with a bit of a sexy growl.

"What?! Ugh, Bakura no! I just need to get a bandage, I cut my finger chopping onions!" I said in a defensive manner.

"If that's all why did you even ask to come in?" Bakura said from behind the door. Suddenly, the roar of the water from the shower stopped.

"Well, can I enter or not?" I asked impatiently.

"Yes Hikari, come in." Bakura said calmly.

As I entered the bathroom, a wet Bakura with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist blocked my path to the cabinet.

Bakura seized my bleeding finger and examined it thoroughly before quickly taking a razor and making the cut worse.

"Ow!" "Bakura what do you think you're doing?!" I shouted at him.

Before I knew it, my bloody finger was in his mouth being slathered with his saliva.

"Eww! Bakura!" I exclaimed.

I tried to pull my finger out of his grip, but I was unsuccessful, as he held down my entire arm.

I wasn't sure how long he was sucking the blood from my finger, but my vision got hazy, and then I fainted.

Once I opened my eyes I awoke in a hospital bed, with Bakura hovering over me smirking.

"Your blood was delicious Ryou. Thanks for sharing." Bakura cackled.

*end flashback*

**

Malik shook his head. "That's nothing compared to Marik! Your yami may have a fetish for blood, but my yami is insane. He loves to see people in pain. Hearing people scream from pain practically gives him an orgasm! In fact, just the other day.."

*flashback*

Malik's POV

I walked torward the kitchen to ask Isis when dinner was going to be finished, but before I made it to the kitchen, I clumsily stubbed my toe on a large stone vase in the living room.

"Ouch!" I yelped rubbing my toe.

All of a sudden, Marik appears in front of me, and moves his face close to mine and whispers, "Oh Malik, that was wonderful. I want to hear more!"

"What are you talking about Marik?" I asked backing away from his face, as it was too close for comfort.

Before I knew it, Marik had shoved me violently on the ground and my head knocked against the coffee table.

I winced in pain. "Why the hell did you do that!?"

Marik had something of a malicious grin on his face and he somehow had taken the millennium rod from me and and opened it so the dagger inside was visible.

"Hikari." He said with a hungry tone with his tounge hanging out of his mouth psycotically.

I screamed and darted torward my bedroom.

Marik shouted from behind me, "Hikari! Don't scream from fear, I want to hear those beautiful screams of pain!"

He chased me until I made it to my bedroom and locked the door.

"Come out Hikariii." Marik said in a singsong voice.

"Hell no!" I shouted praying he would leave soon.

Eventually, He left my bedroom door after Isis called for dinner and he forgot what he was doing.

*end flashback*

"I don't think that's as bad as nearly bleeding to death because your yami likes the taste of your blood!" Ryou exclaimed.

"I don't think bleeding to death is as bad as almost getting mauled by your yami to death just because he likes to hear you scream!" Malik shot back.

"Almost, is they key word." Ryou stated.

"Ryou, you have no idea! I bet 1,000 yen that taking care of Bakura would be a breeze compared to Marik." Malik said smugly.

"Oh my, you're the one who has no idea." Ryou said shaking his head. "I would gladly trade yami's with you Malik."

"Fine then. Let's do it, we'll trade yami's for a week. If you last that long. Let's see who has the most psychotic, unbearable, mischievious yami. If we can stand them better than our own yami's, then the winner gets 1,000 yen...first one to crack loses." Malik suggested.

"Sounds good. Let's shake on it." Ryou said as he as Malik shook hands.

Just as they released each other's palms, they heard a loud explosion from the game room, and Bakura and Marik exited the room quietly.

"...I'm not going to ask..." Ryou sighed rubbing his temples.

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-The Lunar Rainbow