author's note:

posted 26 May 2016. re-using a story link, don't mind me.

I'm not doing this crazy shit for you only to have you get us caught.

given one chance (it was a moment of weakness)

[-]

"Mac? Mac, do you copy?"

I reach down and unclip the walkie-talkie from the waistband of my black leggings. "This is Marlene," I respond. "I'm by the back garden; I'll be at the rendezvous point in two-" My eyes are still adjusting to the darkness, so I don't see the monsters that turn out to be just trees until it's too late.

My younger sister starts full-on cackling on the other end of the walkie-talkie. "What did you trip on?" she manages to say in between bouts of laughter. "Air? Reg's mother's prize azaleas? Merlin, Mac, if you took out that witch's azalea bushes -" The end of Melinda's sentence is lost in a new round of cackling.

"Sod off," I mutter in annoyance to her. I pick myself up from the dirt and brush mulch off my bum. "I'll have you know that I tripped over a tree root, all right? Mrs Black's azaleas are safe. And be quiet, will you? I'm not doing this crazy shit for you only to have you get us caught."

Melinda tones down the volume but she continues to poke fun at my misfortune. I roll my eyes, re-clip the walkie-talkie to my hip, and do my best to ignore her remarks. As stealthily as I can, I creep through the Black's garden, taking care to avoid the azalea bushes and the patches of property that are connected to motion sensors. The garden remains unlit and undisturbed when I meet up with my sister at the garage.

"You've got a bit of dirt on your nose, did you know?" she greets me.

"Clever," I say and make a face at her, not that she can see my reaction in the blackness of night. By now, my sight has adjusted enough for me to make out her darker silhouette. I peer at her hands but can't tell if they are empty or not. "Did you bring the eggs? And the toilet paper?"

Melinda says, "Yep, and the ladder, too. Merlin, I hope we have enough supplies. I didn't know if three dozen would be enough or not."

I snort. "How mad are you with Regulus?"

My younger sister passes me a carton of eggs and points to which window is her ex-boyfriend's. Regulus's room is dark and void of its occupant, just like she promised it would be before she dragged me along tonight. Melinda has the honour of throwing the first egg at the house; we watch it hit the façade and ooze out all over the bricks. A garden light spotlighting the trellis of trailing roses underneath Regulus's window illuminates her egg-splatter handiwork.

"He told me that he needed 'space,'" Melinda says sometime around half a dozen eggs are gone. "And then he says he misses me and that he swears he's going to change but the next thing I know, he's off snogging Emmeline Vance!"

I blink, not seeing how this would be a shock to Melinda. She knew going into her on-and-off-again relationship with Regulus Black that he would be a commitment-shy fuck boy. But, she looks genuinely upset by this turn of events, so I peel off my egg-y gloves and wrap her in a hug.

"So, this is it? Things are officially done with you two? No more breaks?" I ask as I finger-comb her blonde ponytail.

Melinda lets out a shuddering breath. "This is it," she confirms. "We are never, ever getting back together."

I smile at my fourteen-year-old kid sister. She's so young and already thinks she has got the world figured out. It hurts my heart to see her jaded by love already, but Melinda is beautifully brilliant like a phoenix rising from the ashes of her past mistakes. I am so incredibly proud of her for walking away from what has been the most toxic relationship in her life. I hand her the twelfth egg in the first carton and tell her, "Make it count."

She closes her eyes as if making a wish. Then, she lets the egg sail.

"You didn't," I say in flabbergasted shock.

"I did," Melinda half-laughs and half-sobs.

I stare at the wrecked azalea bush that is now dripping and glistening in egg membranes. "Hand me the other carton," I say after a moment. Then, I lob egg after egg at those blasted bushes and the gnarly willow tree that tripped me up earlier. With the third egg carton in hand, Melinda moves on to other areas of the house beyond Regulus's bedroom.

"Ready to TP the shit out of this place?" I ask once all of our eggs lie in a sticky mess all over the house's exterior and Mrs Black's blasted azaleas.

Melinda opens up the ladder and positions it in the garden by the aforementioned terrible tree of tripping. "Ready." She steadies the ladder while I climb up and artfully toss toilet tissue into the branches. I don't have any technique in mind beyond covering as much surface area as I can in fluttering white strips.

After the tree, we move onto the azalea bushes and a few of the other flowering garden shrubs. Melinda does the bulk of the groundwork. As she trashes the garden, she shares personal hate stories towards Mrs Black who's apparently an over-involved and critical mum who spoils Regulus and believes he can do no wrong. The azalea bushes are shown absolutely no mercy. Neither is Regulus's reputation.

"Are you gonna get that?" Melinda asks while we take a break and admire our vandalism.

"Get what?" I ask. I think that the willow tree could do with another draping of toilet paper; its branches are still a little too bare for my liking.

"Your phone is ringing."

"It is?" I say and reach into my back pocket. "Oh, shit!" I drop the phone in the dirt upon seeing the caller ID. Thankfully, my phone screen doesn't shatter - I wouldn't put it past Mrs Black to put rusty nails in her flower beds to deter wildlife and people from getting too close - but that also means Melinda has a clear view of just who is calling me.

"Sirius?" She makes an unpleasant face as she spits out the name of Regulus's older brother. "What does he want?"

I shrug. "Hell if I know." I know his name because we've been in school with each other for forever and we did a group project together a few years back, but other than that, I wouldn't go so far as to call us friends. Especially not with the connotation that being a female friend of Sirius Black usually has. I bend down and pick my phone up, swiping right to answer it as I do so. "Sirius. Hi."

"No, don't answer that!" Melinda whisper-shouts at me a little too late. She has a panicked look in her eyes and lunges at me but I shift out of reach and defend my hold on my phone.

A smooth, deep voice filters through the phone's speaker. "Babe, what are you doing?"

"Oh, you know," I respond airily as I continue to duck and dodge Melinda's frantic swipes. "Stuff." I pause before adding in: "And I'm not your babe."

She growls in frustration at me and hisses, "Mac! You're fraternizing with the enemy!"

"Uh-huh," Sirius makes a noise of skepticism at the same time that I reply to Melinda: "He's not the enemy, his brother is."

"You're going to give us away!"

"Are you with your sister?" There's definitely a note of suspicion in his voice, now.

"Way to go," I mouth at Melinda. She ignores me and gestures for me to hurry up and end the call. To Sirius, I say, "Yeah, and your brother is on her shit list. Permanently, this time. Tell him no amount of flowers or songs or begging for forgiveness will win her back."

He's laughing. Not the reaction I was expecting, but all right. "McKinnon, babe. Reg and Melinda are fourteen years old. For all of their dramatics, the world isn't ending just because they're going through a little bit of fucking teenage angst."

I roll my eyes. "Mhmm, okay, so I can see where Regulus gets his fabulous charm from." I twirl the end of my ponytail and ask in a bored tone, "So, was there a point to this conversation? Because if not, I've got some important stuff to be doing."

"Right. Well, I wouldn't want to keep you from your 'stuff.' And just so you know, maybe think about including me next time you decide to prank my brother? For instance, I could've told you that Reg is a little more partial to his guitar and the garage where his band meets up in rather than the garden or his bedroom window. Especially considering that he's not the one who is on yard duty."

"Shit," I wince upon the realisation. Guilt gnaws at me. Mrs Black is a shrew on her best day and I feel bad for creating work for Sirius now that I know he is going to bear the brunt of her ire when she sees Melinda's and my additions to her home and garden. "Wait, how did you find out?"

He laughs again. It's a really nice laugh, one that Melinda and I do not deserve. "Babe, you're kind of an amateur at this mischief thing."

That's not an answer at all, but if Sirius has already discovered Melinda and me, it won't be long before Mrs Black finds out what we have done. "Pack up. We gotta go," I tell Melinda. "Hey, Sirius?"

"What's up, McKinnon?"

"No hard feelings, right? For what it's worth, I'm sorry my younger sibling egged your house… and that I helped."

"I don't know, McKinnon," he says slowly. There is an undercurrent of amusement in his voice. "No girl has ever tried this hard to get my attention. How about dinner and we'll call it even?"

I blink. "What?" How did he go from my sister's revenge on his little brother to using it as a situation to ask me out?

"This Friday after the game for seven at the Three Broomsticks. That sound good to you?"

"Um…"

Melinda turns to look at me in surprise. She has the ladder tucked under one arm and empty toilet paper rolls encasing her fingers. "You're still on the phone?"

I cover the mouthpiece and say, "He asked me out!"

"And you should've said no!" She puts the egg cartons in the crook of my elbow, snags the phone and swiftly hangs up, and nudges me in front of her. "Walk."

Leaving is so much easier than sneaking in. Now that the element of surprise and our cover is semi-blown, we've kind of dropped our whole undercover spy act. "What was I supposed to tell him?"

"That you're not interested?"

"Yeah, but…" This time around, I manage to dodge the willow branches.

"Don't tell me you are! He's Reg's older brother!"

"So now he's off limits?"

We're out on the side street a few houses down from the Black's where I had parked so nobody would trace our car back to our shenanigans. I pop the trunk and we shove all of our incriminating evidence into the back of my car where no one will see it. Melinda slides into the passenger seat and messes with the passcode on my phone.

"Melinda?" I ask as I start the ignition. "What are you doing?"

My sister smirks. "Calling James. You're going to go on a date with him and see if Sirius is actually serious about starting a relationship with you. I won't let you be played by a scared-of-commitment Black like I was."

I shake my head, a smile on my face, and steer us out of the Black's neighbourhood and onto the moonlit highway towards our home. Fourteen years old, and she already loves the players and the mind games. I know that James won't take her seriously - he's like a brother to us, not to mention Sirius's best mate - but I let Melinda have her fun.

"I love you, you know that?" I tell her.

"Love you, too, Mac," Melinda says with sisterly pride. "And thanks for having my back tonight. You're the best."

[-]

based on the tumblr prompt "i'm sorry my younger sibling egged your house... and that i helped"

Written for the Dark Knight prompt on the Cinema Competition II: write about the dark. Inspired by Taylor Swift's song "Should've Said No."