As Spock stood before the Vulcan High Council, he felt calm. The nervous tension that had filled him since he had woken up that morning had dissolved after his conversation with his mother. Although pride from one's parents was not something that a Vulcan should feel pleased to receive, Spock was pleased none-the-less.
"You have surpassed the expectations of your instructors, Spock."
From his position atop the impressive dias, the chairman of the Vulcan High Council gazed down at the applicant standing patiently before them. The soaring atrium was reflective of all that was admirable and noble about Vulcan and its people, a chamber where reasoned aesthetics melded seamlessly with logical design. Several members of the Council were present, Sarek among them.
The chairman continued. "You have excelled in every field you have studied, including physical achievement. I believe that it will be some time before a number of the standards you have set in the course of your matriculation will be equaled. I can do no more than to say that your final record is flawless." The speaker paused. "With one exception: I see that you have applied to Starfleet as well as to the Academy.
Several of the other councilors leaned forward slightly. Spock did not miss the movement, nor was it intended that he should. Another time, an earlier time, it might have disconcerted him. Not anymore. He had always had confidence in his individual talents. That was now equaled by the confidence he had in himself. He responded without hesitation.
"It was logical to cultivate multiple options."
"Logical but unnecessary," the science ministered countered a little too quickly. "You are hereby accepted into the Vulcan Science Academy with full academic and associative privileges. A distinction all the more significant given that you will be the first half-human member." The minister was watching the applicant closely. "Does this surprise you?"
Spock did not hesitate. "Your question presumes an emotional investment in the outcome I do not have."
Satisfied, the minister sat back nodded approvingly to Sarek. The formality signified by the brief interview was all but over. Almost.
"It is truly remarkable, Spock," ventured another of the councilors, "that you have achieved so much despite your disadvantage. Welcome to the Academy."
Almost, Spock thought. There it is. Almost. "If you would clarify, Minister, the nature of the 'disadvantage' to which you are referring?"
Not a hint of emotion was present in the minister's voice as he replied. "Your human mother, of course."
The conflict that boiled forth within the applicant did not manifest itself visibly. Only the glance he threw his father in his father's direction hinted that anything other than rote acceptance was present within the young man's mind. Ever the consummate diplomat, Sarek said nothing. His eyes widened slightly: suggestion or command, it did not matter. As the councilors were preparing to rise and disperse, Spock made the first spontaneous decision of his life. He did not feel entirely comfortable with it, but it felt...right.
Even if it was not entirely logical.
"Council, Ministers-- I must decline."
Perpetrations to return to the other daily duties were instantly forgotten. Confused looks gave way to cold stares. His colleagues on the Council left it to the science minister to respond. Where previously his tone had been complimentary and welcoming, now it was flat with disbelief. But, of course, not with anger.
"Are we to understand that you are refusing the honor that has been granted to you? No Vulcan has ever declined admission to this academy."
Completely at peace now with himself and his decision, the applicant replied coolly. "Then, as I am half-human, your record remains untarnished."
Sarek had held his peace as long as he was able but, confronted with his son's astonishing demurral, could no longer remain silent.
"Spock. You have made a commitment to honor the Vulcan way, even in the face of unreasoning prejudice." At this the councilor who had made the pivotal comment shot a look in the diplomat's direction. Sarek ignored him.
"At the moment, Father, I can think of no greater way to honor our species than to attend Starfleet as its first Vulcan. Given a choice between 'firsts,' I have decided to opt for that one."
The councilor that had spoken last raised his voice without altering his tone. He did not have to. His choice of words was sufficiently accusatory.
"Why did you come before this council today? Why did you waste our time? Are you playing at some sort of irrational game? Or was it to satisfy your emotional need to rebel?"
Spock betrayed not a hint of what he had been accused of displaying. He was calm and collected as he addressed the group before him. "I came with the intention of enrolling, as my father wished. However, your,..." he hesitated long enough that no one could fail to get the point, "...'insight' has convinced me that for the foreseeable future at least, my life does not lie in the pursuit of pure academics. Therefore, the only emotion I wish to convey is...gratitude." He nodded ever so slightly. "Thank you, ministers and councilors, for your consideration. Live long and prosper."
No emotion in those words, not even in the last few. But just a hint, perhaps, of a nonverbal suggestion best exemplified by a distinctly human digital gesture with which those on Vulcan High Council were not familiar.
As he turned, Spock's eyes met those of his father. Sarek's disappointment was evident in his expression. Yet in addition to the disappointment there was a trace of something else, of something more. As he departed, head high, Spock could not be at all sure he had interpreted it correctly. His uncertainty was understandable.
While it was perfectly acceptable and even understandable that his human mother express pride in the accomplishments and actions of her son, it would not be customary for his completely Vulcan father to take pride in any kind of repudiation, whether propounded by himself or by those he loves.
Chapter End Notes:
Might I state that this entire chapter (besides the very beginning and the ending) is blatant copying from the Star Trek novelization by Alan Dean Foster. When I thought of this 5&1 idea, originally I had not planned to include this part, but when I realized it was a perfect 'live long and prosper' moment and I could cut out a less than great idea I had for one of the other chapters, I decided to use the material provided.
For those of you who haven't read/heard of the novelization, you can just ignore this.
For those of you who have, please don't hurt me. I only plan on doing it one more time in the third chapter and then the other 4 chapters will be all me.