This is a KakashixSakura story, also a small nejixtenten and sakuraxneji, with drama, romance, angst, adventure, and fluff, if you don't like it, DON'T READ IT!

This story is one of many that flooded through my mind, I'm just not good at getting them on paper (or Microsoft words, in this case)

It will be a multichapter story, I still have no idea how many chapts there will be and if my lack of motivational skills even allows this story to continue.

Chapter 1

- Four stories to start from-

After Neji had lit the final candle on her dinner table, he let his eyes gaze through, probably in a short amount of time, their apartment. It was not small, it would fit for two persons exactly. The apartment consisted of three rooms. If you walked into the front door, you would come in the living room, there were two couches and a big chair with a large amount of pillows on it. There were quite a few pictures on the wall, her team, family, friends, but a small picture that hung next to the window got his eye. It was a new one. He saw his girlfriend in a beautiful red dress and himself in a tuxedo, happily laughing at the camera.

The picture had been taken a week ago, at the wedding of Shizune and Genma. The two had been together for 5 years now, and decided it would be for the best if they made the everlasting promise. After all, they were ninja and that concludes to a very unpredictable future, especially since Shizune was the Hokage's assistant, and Genma one of Konoha's top jounin. It had been quite a nice wedding, Shizune was in one of the most beautiful dresses he had ever seen, it was an elegant strapless white gown, which had a ribbon closure on the back. The dress was long, and slid over the floor with every step she took. Genma had been in a tuxedo, a black one with a black bow tie and a white shirt, and of course the black leather shoes.

There was a short ceremony, Genma wanted it not to be boring, and a dinner and party after. Almost every ninja in the village that wasn't on a mission had been at the ceremony, for them it was nice to see some happiness due to the pain, killing and suffer they had to endure almost every day. At the dinner and party only their closest friends were invited. Neji wasn't really one of them but Shizune saw Sakura as her sister, and Neji was her boyfriend so of course he was also invited. Sakura had shown that night that she really could dance well. They had a lot of fun, and had been caught up in the moment when Naruto had shown up with his camera in his hand to make the lovely shot that was now hanging on her wall. The smile that she gave the camera was the one Neji had fallen for those months ago. Her smile was always so bright and warm, Neji believed she could wind every man on her finger if she put up that smile. As he lifted his gaze of the picture and onto the right, he saw a big window with the hokage tower and the stone wall behind it, it gave a splendid view on how beautiful Konoha could be, especially now, in the beginning of September when the sky was still clear from the clouds and you could see the stars that shone brightly against the dark background. It was one of his favorite views. Yep, it was a perfect night to ask your girlfriend to move in together, so he had made Sakura's favorite dinner at her place because he wanted to surprise her.

Now the only thing left do was to what for his medic to come home after her shift at the hospital.

At the moment that Neji had been watching the stars, on the other side of Konoha, another eye lifted to the sky to see the light sparkling from above.

The copy-nin had been wondering around the town after his long mission. He had been gone for 3 months, he was sent to protect the daughter of a rich merchandise, a simple chuunin could have handled it, but they had paid for a jounin, because, of course every daddy wants his daughter to be in the best hands.

The reason for protection were a few threatening notes of that his daughter would be kidnapped, Kakashi had to find out who sent them and why. But Kakashi couldn't find a trace of where the notes had come from so he had to wait until there came another one. After 3 months that note had finally come, and as Kakashi used Pakkun to trace back the scent of the notes, he had found tree boys of the young age of 17. Kakashi wasn't so senseless to immediately beat the crap out of them, but had just asked them what their objective was. The boys, who were absolutely not in the ninja-business, had been able to see that they were in trouble as the copy-nin had approached them. They didn't run, they weren't stupid. So they just told Kakashi what they had been up to. They needed money, and well, as the daughter of a rich merchandise, she had made an easy target. Kakashi had asked them why they let out about the kidnapping before it had even been done, the answer was simple. Every time they had dropped the note in the mailbox, the preparations for the kidnapping had already been done. The only problem was that their hearts just had not allowed to kidnap a small child of 5 years old, and they had chickened-out. Kakashi wasn't the kind of guy that gave speeches like Guy about the beauty of youth and that their hearts might be in the right places, but he did tell them that if he found them doing it again he might actually slip a kunai through their throats. Kakashi didn't say it like he was a killing machine, it was more of warning that they were doing something incredibly dangerous, and there were some ninja's that were not into excuses and if the next time they would get caught by one of those, their lives would be over.

Kakashi immediately caught the fear in their eyes as he had said this. He decided to leave them alone with their deeds, not thinking they would ever try to do it again. After their confrontation, Kakashi's mission was over and he had to say goodbye to the little girl, where he had been a big brother for in the past few months. She had given him a big hug and said that 'brother Kashi must see them again soon'. Kakashi, who didn't easily let his personal space invaded, weirdly gave the hug back as he padded her on her back, not really knowing what to do. After the big hug she had given him, he gave her a smile and said that he would visit them again soon, to check on her of course, then he turned around, a little touched by the affection from the girl, and he speeded back through the trees, back to his own apartment, his own bed, and his own bookcase.

Because Kakashi hadn't been expecting the mission to take such a long time, he had only brought Icha Icha tactics with him. He had to admit that for reading the book for the past 3 months he had grown a little bored and he couldn't wait to find out if Jiraiya had written that new novel he had working on for quite a while, probably waiting for him in the stores right now. Unfortunately for the copy-nin, his time of arrival was bad luck, and the shops had already closed so he had to wait till the morning.

Continuing his way through the village, he found himself going to the place where he had spend a great deal of time. The memorial. As the stone appeared in front of him he noticed it still was the same except for the few names that had been added, just as Kakashi had remained the same, but also he had new memories and made new friends. He stared at the names of his fallen friends. He missed them, a great deal. After Asuma died those 5 years ago, something had changed in Kakashi's life. He didn't saw his former friends as much as he used to, he even had heard Genma had gotten married to Shizune as he was still away on that mission. That also went for his former team, Naruto was one of the top anbu, just like Sasuke and Sai, Yamato had started teaching on the academy, and Sakura had become head-medic of Konoha's Hospital. And where was he? He was still the same old jounin, and by old, he meant old. 35 years was not a young age for a ninja, and in a week he would turn 36. In the last 5 years he hadn't gotten stronger, he only knew a few new tricks for his sharingan that he had learned by fighting Sasuke. But that also came with a prize, he found himself rubbing his red eye for comfort more often lately, and he couldn't use it as long as he once could. It was slightly irritating that everyone was getting on with their lives, and he remained behind. The same went for his jounin friends. Kurenai had a very nice 5-year-old son, which was raised by herself so she was now a single home-mom, but Kakashi didn't believe that Kurenai really missed the ninja-life. After it cruelly took away her probably future-husband, she had grown quite protective over her friends and her son. Gai had still remained the same, only even he had a girlfriend now. Kokoro was her name. She was a sweet and quite girl of his own age and had long brown hair with big brown eyes. She was not perfect but she was absolutely not ugly either. No, Kakashi didn't care about imperfectness, he believed there was no such thing as a perfect being. Sometimes he wondered if Gai was into it because of her name, Kokoro meant spirit, and as everyone knew 'the spirit' was Gai's favorite speech subject. Next to Gai, even Anko had found herself a boyfriend. It was no other then Yamato. Kakashi wondered how the hell they had ended up together, but maybe he didn't want to know either. And to Kakashi's great despair he had just heard that Iruka had hooked up with Ayame.

Now he was officially the only single in their group. And it was never fun to be an extra wheel to the carriage. It wasn't that he was unable to find himself a woman, no, the opposite actually. Most of the time the woman already came to him before he even set foot in the pub, shops, houses or any other location. Yep, if he wanted a woman right now he only needed to give them a glance and a smile and the most were already at his feet. Kakashi didn't understand it, they hadn't even seen his face yet. He had heard from his female friends that his charm most likely did the trick, and his mysteriousness only added an extra lift in his appeal. But still, he was 36 and still single. He had girlfriends in the past, but for none he had felt real love. Because he disliked lying to them, he had told them truth at some point, mostly followed by a few punches and foul words. But he knew that in the end he always had done the best thing for both of them. If you really loved someone, you wouldn´t lie to them and you could appreciate their closeness with you. Kakashi´s personal space was not something to invade and his former girlfriends all know it. It just didn´t feel right to him.

After a couple of minutes, or maybe quarters, he always forgot the time when he was at the memorial, he decided it would be best to go to the hokage tower to fill in his mission report, and then he would go back to his apartment to take a long, very long nap.

As he approached the building, he listened to his own footsteps that hit the ground. It was late, and those minutes probably had been quarters. As he walked up the stairs, he found a girl sitting in the middle of the stairs, her head was looking at her feet. ´Konbanwa, Tenten-senpai' He said quietly, not to disturb her in her obviously lost thoughts, but also not to be rude and to completely ignore her.

Tenten's head shoot up to meet the copy-nin's eye as he gave her a formal smile. She didn't know him quite well, she had worked with him a couple times in the past but still felt like a small child when she looked at him. 'Konbanwa, Kakashi-sensei' she said, trying her best to give him a smile, she stood up so that he could pass by her. After she saw him disappear in the building, she sighed and let herself slowly drop back on the stairs. It was hard for her to put up a smile these days.

She had just been assigned to another A-rank mission, she had just come back from one a day ago.

But she did understand Tsunade, Thunder and Stone were on the edge of war. The mist had been acting pretty suspicious lately, their ninja's had been located at the borders of the Fire country, interfering with an anbu mission of Konoha. It was not the first time this year, and when the fire asked for an explanation they simple said it was probably because the client asked for the same mission in more than one country. It was true this happened sometimes, because the clients were sure that at least one country would accept their mission. But it was a lame reason, fire knew, mist knew. It happened, but not once a week, and absolutely not on anbu missions. Anbu missions were mostly A-rank missions or higher, that dealt with assassination, torture or interrogation. Most of the missions were top-secret and someone who asked for such a mission from a country usually had its reasons. Some missions meddled with other countries affairs, like missing-nins and so on. Therefore no one would be so stupid to let two countries know about it, if you did, you asked for trouble.

Konoha did not know how mist received their secret info about the anbu missions, but it was troublesome. It could cause war, and with thunder already being edgy with earth, and Konoha finally had its peace and quiet back after the last great war, it was not something they wished for.

The missions came on and on and never seemed to end.

But Tenten really didn't care about that much. It gave her distraction of her somewhat doomed personal life…. Yeah, life had not been good for her the past year.

She thought back of her near fatal mission in October last year. The mission was a simple assassination, but he was hell strong. They had been with a three-man cell, Neji, Sakura & tenten herself. Neji & Sakura were already dating at that time, so Tenten felt like she was a third wheel on the wagon. Of course they needed to stay professional, but Tenten couldn't help but notice how the two lovebirds were sharing hidden looks and smiles. To be honest, it sickened her. She was really happy for Neji that he had finally found someone, she just wished that she had plucked the shoes and told him how she really felt about him. Now it was all lost and her future with the black haired hyuuga disappeared into thin air. The mission went pretty smoothly for them, for Tenten it didn't. When they had arrived at the point of assassination, they noticed that there was more than one enemy. There were four of them. They were all in the bingo book. Neji, Sakura and Tenten needed to split up.

The one that needed to be taken from his life was far the most dangerous, Neji decided it would be his target. That leaved Sakura and Tenten to deal with the other three. They made their plan and waited for the right moment to surprise them by attack. Neji went off with his enemy in a different direction, leaving Sakura and Tenten having no clue of how the fight went. Instead of worrying over their beloved captain, they focused on their own appointed enemies. They were rapidly fast and had great defenses, something that was really a problem for a weapon-girl like Tenten, of course next to weapons she also knew her fair share of nin-,tai- and genjutsu. But she noticed soon that her level was not enough to beat these guys. She tried to make up her mind of what to do next, kunai bombs? kage bunsins?, maybe a few dynamic entries? and then a fiercely shout was heard from over the field of grass, which could be better named as mud pool right now, Sakura had received a fine blow in the guts, and was send back flying and fell unconscious on the ground. 'Shit' that was the only thing running through Tenten's mind at that moment. If she didn't do anything quick, the girlfriend of her beloved Hyuuga would die, and she knew he would never forgive her for that. Quickly making up her mind she forced the big guy she was fighting into defense and delivered a fine dynamic entry. Then she summoned the Iron protection wall, to cover Sakura. She quickly went to Sakura's enemy and began a fierce taijustu battle with him. And when she thought it went pretty well, and she was getting the upper hand, something stabbed her in the back. 'Shit' How could she have forgotten?, the one that had not been consumed into the fighting had sneaked up behind her and drew a sharp kunai through her lung, Unable to breath, Tenten's vision got blurred and she felt herself fell down to the ground.

The next thing she knew, she opened her eyes to see the roof of a clean hospital room. She had slowly raised herself up, her chest in bandages. She saw to people in the hallway, they were hugging. She heard a part of their conversation…. 'Thank you for rescuing me, Neji' ..'No prob, but we really need to tell Tenten she needs to work on her analyzing skills'… 'If she had been better in those, I wouldn't have had the chance of losing you'…..Tenten pulled her sheets high up until her head was hidden in the white softness. Tears sprung in her eyes. She had heard enough. Neji was officially blaming her for almost losing his lover, she had been unable to safe Sakura, and last but not least, her love of her life just confessed that Tenten really was a bother sometimes. It had hurt like hell. She had never felt so useless before.

The weeks after that went pretty normal, although she did put a lot more effort into her training, even to much sometimes. Rock Lee had already founded her a few times on the training field, unconscious, chakra fully depleted. 2 months later, she decided she would take up the anbu exam. It was hard and very very troublesome. But she passed it. She was happy because now she knew she was not useless. Useless people don't get through the anbu-exam. She felt better than ever. When she went to Neji to inform him on her improvement he had only given her a small smile, nothing more, not even congratulation. On that moment Tenten decided she would never ever let her heart call for Neji again.

Dragged by Ino into the pub, she found going out to be pretty enjoying. On one lucky night she even found herself a companion for the night. His name was Katsuo. He had the sweetest blue eyes she had ever seen and short black hair. But of course, faith was always bitter. She had been dating with him for 4 months when he asked her to move in with him. She had agreed, although she knew it was stupid to do so. Tenten knew she would love Katsuo with every inch of her heart, if she just could let go of that one person that held her heart tight. She actually hoped that dating Katsuo would put her mind off him, but it didn't. Katsuo was far too sweet to lie too. Tenten decided she would break up with him as soon as he returned from his mission. Too bad he never did. He was cruelly assassinated by the enemy, with the last words 'I love you, Tenten' before he drew his terminal breath. Tenten was broken after. She may not have loved him enough, but she did care. After that she only took on high-risk missions, and Kakashi had been her partner on quite a few off them. When the summer began, she was far on the road of depression. She didn't give a shit about anything, and tried to drink away her pain. Luckily for her, she had great friends who pulled her through her dark period. They came around more often, made her smile and feel appreciated. Slowly she started to rebuild her life again. She started to enjoy her choice of career and not dwelling on the past, but on the future. She was still young and if she wanted her future to be bright, her future would be bright. Gai-sensei never said much interesting stuff, he was always babbling about eternal youth etcetera etcetera. But his spirit to keep living was almost contagious. Almost.

Tenten had been very lucky with her team, of course Rock Lee could be freaking annoying sometimes, but his heart was of good nature and he was full of spirit and laughter. Gai-sensei may have held the most ridicules speeches but some, a very small amount, made a little sense sometimes, he was a good sensei, had a lot of patience and could explain things very well. The pretty boy of the family was of course Neji, he was good at everything and may look cold from the outside, but deep inside there was a personality with willingness. If she looked at the other teams she was lucky, of course everyone changes, and most had in a positive way. But in their early teens, she had really felt for her friends.

Ino had been stuck with a great sensei, but an extremely lazy teammate and one who was nice but could only think about food all the time. Hinata had been stuck with a mysterious and probably colder than Sasuke teammate, who loved bugs. Bugs! Even thinking about living with those creatures…he even let them under his clothes! Next to him, she had Kiba, the dog boy on her team. He was nice, but just as loud Naruto. She had a nice sensei, Kurenai had always been there for her, just like Gai, she was also very patience and kind-hearted. Just the person that Hinata needed. But far worse than anyone else was Sakura, yeez, she reallllly had bad luck. First it was Naruto, number one in surprising persons, loud, nosy, hyper-hyper-active, and a mini-perv, next had been Sasuke, he was good looking but he also was…well…icy, cold, distant, lonesome, cocky, arrogant… . Later even emotionless Sai became part of the team, that guy was really weird. She and those guys were guided by Hatake Kakashi, the laziest, disinterested, NOT closet-perved person on the entire planet if you asked Tenten. She had really felt for Sakura, but of course not anymore. Would you care about someone who stole the love of a lifetime? She may have had the most miserable team in human history but she had grown to be the apprentice of the hokage and now she was one of the most important staff members of Konoha hospital. Jealousy was not something Tenten held often, but for Sakura….the girl seemed to have everything, and were was she? Desperately trying to climb up the ladder of ranks to gain some reason for living.

When life began to light up a bit, again, she was assigned to an A-rank mission. The mission was undercover. They needed to infiltrate an enemy base and to find out who was the spy who sold Konoha's weaponry to them. It was a hard mission, not psychical but mental, you could trust nobody, and everyone who appeared to be nice, you needed to doubt. She had spend a month in distrust, and of course in the end, the person who betrayed them was the one who was Mr. nice guy, luckily he was now safely locked up in one of the anbu quarters for interrogations. She was tired and all she wanted was to rest and spend days and days with friendly people who she trusted. But no, of course that could not happen. The A-rank mission she had just been assigned to was everything but relaxing.

Knock, knock

'Come in'

Kakashi shot through the door and closed it behind him, 'Hello Tsunade-…' but he was interrupted.

'Goodnight Hatake, have a seat' Tsunade said, as her eyes gazed on a paper in front of her.

'I have a mission for you!', Eyes not turning from her papers

'A-rank, assassination, 4-man squad, 7:00 am leaving….'

Okay…, so far goes the 'how were you doing in those 3 months you were gone' Kakashi thought when he propped himself in the chair.

'Squad will consist out of you, Sakura, Tenten & Neji', 'you will be the captain..of course..'

'mission details will be in a report that you can come and get at 6:00, your team will also be here to here the details and the requirements, it's not finished yet'

'Any questions? No? Well then on your way….shoof shoof!' She waved her hands in the direction of the door.

'Uhm…Tsunade-sama? I just got back from my 3 month mission, can't somebody else take my place?'

Kakashi normally didn't ask for spare time, but after 3 months of baby-sitting he needed a beer and some reading-time. Not only that, but the stores would open at 9 am,

so his new Icha Icha would have to wait,.. again.

'3 month mission?...'

Yep, she is showing signs of age….

'You weren't on a 3 month mission'

'Yes, I actually was….' Kakashi replied dryly.

'No, that was supposed to be a 2 weeks mission.'

Okay, so no signs of old age...

'It originally was..'

'Well, what happened?' Tsunade seemed to get a little pissed.

'Mission just took longer than expected because the writers of the letters were….'

'Yeah yeah I know the deal, always an excuse right? Before you set off on your mission tomorrow, hand in your report with the REAL reason in it, and now out, I've got better things to do'

Again Tsunade directed him to the door, this time Kakashi gladly followed it and let out a deep breath when outside.

Yeez, she surely was a little stressed out. Normally she would never react this way….It was kinda creepy actually. If Kakashi had learned something over the past few years it was not to argue with a woman who was one, really strong, two, had a short temper and three, who could very precisely focus her chakra. Both Tsunade and mini-Tsunade, like Jiraiya liked to call her, were deadly to the man-kind. Kakashi couldn't argue with this, one hit in the wrong direction and bye-bye next generation (not that Jiraiya cared about that, he was way too old for those things, but still it would damn hurt!).

But still the fact that he had been send on a mission so shortly after, that was not a good sign. Tsunade would usual let them rest for a least a day. It must be a very important mission.

When he passed the entrance of the building on his way out, a flight of pink brushed passed him, almost bumping into him.

'Whoa,..' Sakura nearly tripped over her own feet.

'Konbanwa, Sakura' Kakashi greeted

'Konbanwa, Kakashi-sensei' Sakura smiled happily at him while she was steady on her feet again.

'When did you got back?'

'Just now actually' He said with audible sigh.

'Ah, really? Then I won't hold you, you probably want to go home, but I'll speak catch up with you soon, want to know how you did your baby-sitting job! She grinned as she turned around and hurried back to a probably furious hokage. Before she passed the corner she saw the silver-haired man disappear to what probably was his home and his books.

'Come in'

'Tsunade-sama, I brought the medical forms' Sakura replied as she pushed the door open.

'Ah, great, finally some good news' Behind a large pile of paper a blond head appeared.

'You know about your mission tomorrow, right?'

'Mission?'

'Yeah the one with the assassination…'

'Excuse me, shisou, but I was supposed to have 3 days off to be together with Neji..'

'O yeah, him, that won't be a problem, he 's coming along' 'You'll be in a squad with Tenten, Neji & Kakashi, Kakashi as team leader'

'But shisou…'

'No buts Sakura, you know how busy I am. The incident with mist, the upcoming chuunin exams, and the shortage of ninja. I'm sorry but I can't give you that holiday'

'Could you tell Neji 'bout the mission to? I haven't had the chance to tell him yet, and I'm sure you'll be spending the night with him, right?'

Sakura felt the heat spread on her face. Although everyone knew they were dating, it was weird to hear her shisou put it so bluntly.

She nodded quietly.

'The mission starts at 7:00 am, but meet at 6:00 am here, because I haven't finished your mission forms yet'

'Any questions?'

' No shisou.'

'Then you may leave, I hope you enjoy your night' Sakura found a smirk on Tsunade's face when she said the sentence she had more expected out the mouth of Jiraiya.

Maybe they are spending too much time together..

Although Tsunade would probably never admit it, Sakura knew how she felt about Jiraiya. They loved each other, but it appeared to the outside world more as friends.

Just like her and Naruto. She loved him but not in that way. But Sakura knew Tsunade and Jiraiya both knew they were more than 'just' friends. They just wouldn't admit it.

Stubborn people.

'Goodnight Shisou'

Her front door clicked open that meant Neji was already waiting inside.

And Neji was waiting.

He was sitting on the couch, reading one of her 'boring' novels, while the table had already been set.

The candles were lit and the lights were dimmed.

'Oh Neji…you made me dinner?' Sakura was amazed, Neji had never made her dinner before.

Neji looked up, 'I thought it would be a nice start of our 3 day's off'

The sweet smile on his face made Sakura feel guilty for the fact that she had to bring him the bad news.

'We don't, Tsunade assigned us for a mission tomorrow morning at 6:00 am together with Kakashi and Tenten'

An audibly sign was heard from Neji, it was obvious he had been looking forward to this. Well Sakura couldn't disagree with him, life had just been too busy lately. They barely saw each other.

'That's really a Tsunade-stunt' Neji grunted.

'But at least we've one night...' Sakura tried to lighten the mood, 'and we can still enjoy the dinner you made me right?'

Neji rose from the couch and gave Sakura a kiss, 'of course we can, although we do have to warm it up again, you're pretty late'

'yeah, I know, Tsunade-sama wanted the medical conditions of team Ebisu that came just back from their mission to be filled in, I had to do it after my shift was over'

'That woman does know how to spoil things…, I wonder when Naruto will succeed her'

'That won't be for some time, Tsunade told me, she literally said that she wanted Naruto to have some happy years with Hinata before he takes on the hell-job'

'Someone likes her work…' Neji gave a sarcastic grin while he went over to the kitchen.

'Actually, I think she loves her job, just doesn't want to admit it, and maybe she is even scared of what happens after retirement, she will be spending even more time with Jiraiya…' Sakura answered as she went to help him in the kitchen.

BeepBeepBeepBeepBeepBeep

'Arghh…' a soft grunt was heard from under the sheets. Sakura shot a look at her alarm clock, 5:15 am.

The word 'dammit' was groaned from beside her, Neji climbed out of her, not her, their bed.

After they had finished their dinner, Neji had asked Sakura the question. Of course she said yes, Neji hadn't expected differently. A long night of love-making, that was what they hoped for,

Too bad that Sakura's neighbours were also busy, it was a rather thin-walled apartment. After their, to put it nicely, sweet, and tender, and LOUD love-making, they got into a quarrel, which probably kept the whole neighbourhood awake.

So, their night was spilled. The argument had ended around 3 o'clock with a great slam of what was probably their front door, so after that, 2 hours of sleep was more than necessary for the two of them.

The ninja's pulled themselves out of the soft and warm sheets, into their clothes.

And after breakfast, they left the apartment with on one side, happy to be living together, but on the other side grumpy for not being able to enjoy their time together.

A/N: pfew, first chapter ever written. I'm absolutely fond of Kakasaku, and that's not because of the age difference, but because their characters fit so well :3

-I apologize for the huge amount of grammatical errors, I know a writer shouldn't have these problems, but I do.

English is not my first language, and I'm still having trouble with the grammar (lame….i know)

And that's also the reason why my use of vocabulary is so bad….i'm working on it!

I appreciate tips on how to improve my writing, but please do not rant, I'm also a human being.