Ok, a part of me didn't want to do this, because I really prefer writing about things that other authors don't write about, so normally I try not to write pasts for characters. So I tried to do it in the most original way possible! Which means no lovey-dovey, perfect parents! This first chapter came to me when I thought about why L's name is ACTUALLY "L"?!

"Look at him; he's a little angel, isn't he?" The lady in room M1138 exhaled as she lay back on her pillow layered with sweat.

"How long of a maternity leave is the Academy giving you?"

"Good God, John! I just gave birth to your son and the first thing you ask me is about work?!"

"Well, what am I suppose to say? I'm nervous about being a dad!"

"You could answer my question! Or, you could bring up how his eyes are round and bulgy just like yours!"

"Oh dear…are they really?" The tall slender fellow whispered as if he were worried.

"Well don't go asking me, look for yourself!" The woman pointed to the bassinet next to her.

"Well I'll be…he really does look like me." John leaned over to see the new baby with coal-black hair just staring at him and acknowledging his presence.

"Wow, jolly good observation. You really are the Forensic Science Professor of Excalibur Academy!" The woman spat out sarcastically.

"I'm just saying, Patty, I was hoping he'd come out looking like you. There is a 62% chance that lads look like their mums."

"Oh there you go with the bloody percentages again! It was cute when I met you, but now it's just a bother."

"That's beside the point. You and I both knew that they would be problems if he looked like me."

"Like what, Mr. Columbine? Doesn't Mrs. Columbine already have knowledge of our little tryst?"

"…50% of it…" John sighed as he turned slightly to shield himself from the wrath of his mistress.

"What the heck do you MEAN 50%?! No wait, don't tell me! She KNOWS you had an affair, but you NEVER told her I was PREGNANT?! Is THAT what you're trying to say?!" She yelled.

"You always were the smartest Dean of Students Excalibur ever had, luv." John nonchalantly tried to calm her down.

"Excuse me, is everything alright in here?" A nurse peeped in concerned by ruckus coming from their room.

"Just fine, dear. No need to worry." John assured the nurse with a fake smile. The nurse just glanced at the couple and left.

"She probably doesn't even know our affair lasted a year! Just tell me one thing, John. Why didn't you tell your wife about this baby?"

"To be completely honest with you, I don't plan on raising it. Don't worry, I'll still pay child support, but I'm sure you understand the problems that would arise if the public knew that we had a child together. We are two intelligent and highly-acclaimed staff members of a prestigious university. If the media knew we have a son they'd have a frenzy. We both could lose our jobs, our dignity, and we'd be unable to provide the child. Trust me, Patricia; I'm only thinking of the child."

"Oh cut the sappy crud, John! I know this isn't about him! This is about YOU! You're too much of a cowardly bloke to admit to everyone that you have a love child! You didn't tell your wife because you knew she'd demand a divorce and take away half of your belongings! You KNEW that YOUR reputation would be stained and that YOU would get fired. YOU just want to put this all on me to save YOUR bloody hide! Did you expect that I'd buy that phony plan to "protect" us?"

"I expected you to take your birth control pill so we wouldn't be in this rut in the first place." John selfishly tried to point the blame on her.

"I DID take my bloody pill, John! There is a 1% that the pill will fail. Newsflash, Mr. Know-it-all! Even if it's as low as one percent; IT CAN STILL HAPPEN!"

"For goodness sake, Patty, you're gonna make the poor kid cry."

"Oh, shut up! Don't even act like you care about my baby if you're not man enough to claim him as your own. Just get out of here, you bastard!" Patricia eyes leaked as she hurled a sweat-soaked wash cloth in his direction. He just took it and left very poised and calm. She hated his brutal honesty; absolutely hated it.

Patricia took her baby in her arms and tried to rock him to sleep. Why did she have to bring this innocent baby boy into this mess? She could barely remember getting into this situation herself. All she could think about right now was that stupid idiot, Mr. John Columbine. He had the darkest ebony hair, which he kept neat by day with gel, but at night it was incredibly messy. His skin was really pale, which was completely natural as a child, but it stayed that way since he rarely went out. He spent most of his childhood sitting inside reading. He was the smartest man she'd ever met, but he had the worst of attitudes. He had a serious ego, and he would be so bold as to fire someone and tell them outright it was because they were stupid and useless. Overall, he wasn't really a good person. Why did she even fall for him in the first place? Because he was so smart and he had a little charm to him. She thought to herself. There's just something about evil geniuses with little social skills that is so attractive. That was really stupid. He had no compassion whatsoever. He never initiated any embrace, it'd always been her. Even when he tried to be romantic; it never sounded genuine; more like he was hoping to gain something from her. He never even said a simple "I love you." He wasn't even that good of a lover, so why did she stay with him?

He's a terrible person, but I'm not one to judge. I'm terrible, too. I only kept the affair going because of my stupid rivalry with his wife. Ms. Madison Hemmingway, my arch enemy in everything. She'd always beat me whether it was test scores, athletics, or street smarts. I thought for once that I'd beaten her in something when I seduced her husband, or thought I'd seduced him. As it turns out, I was probably taking the stupid bastard off of her hands. I lose, again. Damn it, I always lose!

She sighed as she dropped her eyes to her new son, who was just staring at her with his bulgy eyes. She must have rocked him a hundred times… wasn't he even the slightest bit sleepy? She sighed again. She couldn't keep calling him he and she'd never stopped to think about a proper name. She was actually hoping John would do it, but the lazy bloke couldn't even do that. She couldn't do it now, she was way too exhausted. If she tried to name him now, her tired brain might come up with something dumb like Lucifer or Levi or…Light. She put her son back into his crib and put her head down for some much needed sleep.

The next afternoon, Patricia was standing in front of the maternity ward with her son's birth certificate. She was eager to just fill it in, check out, and go home. She filled in the last name portion with her own last name: Lawliet. If her moron of an ex-lover wasn't going to part in the boy's life, he had no right including him as a Columbine. She had finally decided this morning to name her baby Lance. Lance Lawliet…she liked the alliteration. She took a moment to think before filling in the first name portion. She thought about how her baby wouldn't have a dad, and how hard life would be as a single mother. I can do it. I'll show him, I'll show everybody! I'll show John I'm perfectly capable of raising a son by myself! And Lance will be such an excellent child that the stupid bastard will be kicking himself for leaving such a smart boy. She slowly started writing the name: L…

"Patty!" The voice of "that stupid bastard" halted her from continuing.

"What makes you think you can call me that anymore?! What are you doing here anyway?" Patricia snapped. John pulled her aside, away from the birth certificate, in order to talk to her. He dragged her down the hallway and into the janitor's closet so they could have some privacy.

"Look, I know I said some rash things yesterday…"

"Like hell you did! You boss me around knowing I was too exhausted to get up and strangle you, and then you have the guts to face me today! Well I'm fine and dandy today, and the only thing keeping me from shoving my fist down your throat is all the people watching!" Patricia threatened.

"Yes, I know I hurt your feelings. I'm here to take back what I said. I will help you raise the baby." John explained trying to calm her down.

"Oh you will, eh? What is it that you want? You never do something unless there's something in it for you."

"Honestly, I'm just trying to be responsible."

"You should've taken responsibility by telling your wife I was having your baby. You should have been responsible by contacting me while I was pregnant instead of hiding from me claiming that being around me would "arouse suspicion" and you should have taken responsibility by driving me to the hospital while I was in labor!"

"I know I've made mistakes, but I'm trying to make things better. Please Patricia, don't take my son from me."

"He's not your son anymore. He's my son. He'll carry my last name and be a hell of a lot better a person than you."

"Do you smell something?" John sniffed the air.

"Oh don't even try to change the subject." Patricia groaned.

"No really, it smells like something's burning." John stated.

"Well don't just stand there, open the door and check it out."

"I would, but the door's locked." John explained as he jiggled the handle.

Outside the janitor's closet, the hospital was an inferno. Something had gone wrong in the laboratory, and the whole place was set on fire. Nurses and doctors struggled to get the patients out. Luckily, all the new babies were rescued as well as their paperwork. Unfortunately, Patricia Lawliet and John Columbine never made it out of the closet and were gulped down in the flames. All the survivors were transferred to another hospital. All the babies were reunited with their families, except for one child. Weeks went by, but no one had come to claim him. The authorities pretty much came to the conclusion that the child was orphaned, so they dropped him off at the local orphanage, Wammy's House. His birth certificate was grabbed from the counter before the flames could get to it, but the nurse who found it almost threw it away because of how blank it was. All the spaces were blank except for two spaces:

LAST NAME: LAWLIET

FIRST NAME: L

Yeah, as you can see, I really tried to make his parents British, maybe a little too hard. I really like the idea of L being born British.