Title: And I Hate You So
Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin does not and never will belong to me. If anyone intends to sue me, my cue is to go ahead. You will just waste money on your lawsuit and get nothing back in return. The most is probably will get is my one and only valuable white strand of hair.
One windy afternoon, Kaoru was walking along the street searching for inspirations for her article in her column.
"Argghhh! What the hell?! I can't seem to think of anything!" Kaoru, exasperated with herself. Just at the moment, she passed by a second-hand store. Her interest was immediately aroused, she decided to pay a visit to the store.
"Good afternoon, Miss! May I help you?" Megami, the boss lady of the store, greeted Kaoru cheerfully.
"Oh... It's ok. I'll look around myself. Hmmm... I'm really surprised to see such a second-hand store. I mean... People chuck away stuffs yet you collect them. Ain't it ironic?" Kaoru said.
"Hehz... Old stuffs are sentimental and meaningful. Everything carries a story behind them..."Megami's voice strained when she realised that Kaoru had lost interest in her speech. Kaoru is flipping through the old collection of black discs.
"I didn't know such discs still have a market. I remember that my first love, Aoshi, was crazy over such discs. On his birthday, I bought him a limited edition black disc that I hunted up and down for it, he was so happy... What?!" Kaoru was reminiscing about her first love but her sweet reminisce was interrupted by something that caused her to be shocked and affected. Megami was drinking coffee and Kaoru's sudden reaction caused her to spill coffee all over her shirt.
"This... This... Disc... Isn't this the gift that I gave Aoshi? There's even my autograph on it! How could... How could... How could he do this to me? I practically hunted up and down Japan for this disc and yet he just chucked it away..." Kaoru exclaimed. Her hands trembling so hard while holding on to a black disc.
"Miss, all men are heartless. They treat us just like tissue. They will just dump us when they are sick and tired of looking at our faces. Do not be sad. When those heartless creatures dumped us, they would chuck everything that reminds them of us away." Megami's point of view on men.
"I want to buy this disc!" Kaoru announced.
"Oopsie! Sorry! I can't let you have this disc. Someone reserves it. In business, trust and honesty are important. If you are really desperate for this disc, why don't you call him?" Megami suggested, holding a slip of paper.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Over the phone...
'Yes, I really sympathise with you. My heart really goes out to you. I think that your first love is the worst excuse ever to be deemed as a human being. Can you put the boss lady on the line please?" Kenshin said. (Kenshin is the guy who reserved the black disc.)
"Yes, Mr Kenshin?" Megami replied.
"I don't care who the heck that woman is! To hell with her! President or whatever shit, I heck! I want the disc! I'm coming now!" Kenshin yelled into the receiver. Poor Megami!
"So he agreed?" Kaoru asked hopefully."
"No." Came the disappointing and shattering reply.
"What?! But... But... He was so sympathetic with me... Alright I'll pay you double of what he's paying. How about it?" Kaoru offered.
"Sorry Miss... I really can't let you have the disc. I would really want to earn your money but trust is important in business. Sorry once again." Megami apologised.
"What the hell?!" With that, Kaoru went off in a huff. Kenshin came by to pick up his disc.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
That night,
Kenshin works as a DJ at night. Some people just plainly detest him. Some find him irritating. Some find him adorable. Some find his voice sexy and sweet. Love him or hate him, up to you!
"Good evening! You're tuning in to "Black Disc Express"! Tonight we are going to talk about " The Beauty of Missing Something". Sometimes, when we lose something that carries a special meaning to us, we would want it back terribly. But what if that something is something that brings back sad memories, would you still want it back? I wouldn't if I was you. Today, I met a lady who found the birthday gift that she given to her first love being chucked away in a second-hand store. The gift was a black disc that I had reserved. She begged me to let her have the disc. I wouldn't. As the DJ of "Black Disc Express", of course, I won't allow my listeners to miss out such a great disc besides, sad memories are not worth keeping. I'm doing her a favour. Alright, time for a song. Let's listen to "The Gift" a track found on the sought-after black disc. This song is dedicated to the lady." Kenshin said. Little did he know that Kaoru was fuming listening to his radio play.
"What the hell? HIMURA KENSHIN! Ahh... Thanks to him... I've got an inspiration for writing." Kaoru thought. With that, she settled down to pen for her column, Luna Talks. (Well, her pen name is Luna, therefore Luna Talks. The chinese translation is "yue jing", synonym for menses.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next day,
"Kenshin, I demand an explanation for THIS!" Saitou, Kenshin's boss, thundered. He slammed the papers in front of Kenshin.
"Now, now, what the hell did I do?" Kenshin thought. He strained his eyes to look at the papers and saw Kaoru's column.
"YUE JING(menses)!!!" Kenshin was stumped and shocked by the title of the column. He went on reading.
"Sympathy is invisible to the naked eye yet obvious to all who feel it. It's a feeling that comes from deep inside. It's a true feeling. Even the most heartless murderers have sympathy, I really can't imagine any humans without sympathy. I've met this person, Himura Kenshin, he's truly the most heartless, cold-blooded person I've ever chanced by. He would not even sympathise with a lovelorn girl..." said the column.
"So what do you have to say? Himura Kenshin, you better think of a feasible solution!" Saitou warned. Kenshin had a plan.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
That night,
"Good evening, Listeners! It's me! You're tuning in to "Black Discs Express"! Yesterday, I remember sharing about "The Beauty of Missing Something", today a female columnist who gets her menses everyday mentally attacked me. Why I think so? Well, her column is titled "Yue Jing" which means menstruation. Woo... I really pity her. She surely spends a lot of money buying sanitary pads. Now heck her irregular menstruation period! As my loyal listeners, all of you should be aware that I do not read the papers often. I'm now more convinced that I shouldn't since there's such a irregular menstruating woman writing daily. Well, I'm a kind soul, though my reputation is tarnished by her, I'll still dedicate a song to her. Alright, let's enjoy this track "That Lady Is A Tramp"!" Kenshin said, pretty satisfied with his get-back.
"Arrrgggghhh! What the hell?! To hell with Himura Kenshin! Arggh!" Kaoru yelled. "Calm down... You will be falling into his trap if you get mad... relax..." Kaoru calmed herself down. She settled down to pen another article for her column.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next day,
"Good job, Kenshin! Our ratings are going up with your conflict with Kaoru. She just wrote an article calling you a pervert, wanna read? Saitou offered.
"Yue Jing(Menses) again? Looks like her menstruation cycle is still upset." Kenshin joked. He proceeded to read.
"...Perverts are strange and always have the strong burning desire in them to attain atrocities that hurt people. They never failed to insult people. I was slandered and insulted by a radio DJ regarding my column, which he refers to it as Menstruation Talks. A person of such calibre should never be a radio DJ as it pollutes innocent minds and dirty our ears..."Kaoru wrote.
"Oh Kenshin, you're being referred to as a pervert! Are you going to swallow this insult down?" Saitou on his attempt to get Kenshin proactive.
"How long have you known me? NO WAY I AM GONNA TAKE IT LYING DOWN!!! She's gonna be my guest for tonight's show. She will regret her imprudence!" Kenshin replied.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
That Night,
"You're tuning in to "Black Discs Express" ! Today, we have a very special guest with us, Kaoru a.k.a Luna. Alright Kaoru, tell us more about yourself..." Kenshin announced.
"No way! Why don't you step down as DJ today and let me the guest is the DJ to question! I'm definitely a better questioner than you!" Kaoru suggested.
"So, You wanna take over me for the night?" Kenshin snickered.
"Are you deaf? I just said so, didn't I?" Kaoru yelled. Just then, the phone rang. Kaoru pick it up.
"To hell with all females in this world! All women suck great time! Women are the most materialistic creatures I've ever seen. My wife absconded with my fortune. You don't understand! You are just another of those spastic creatures!" Kaoru tried cutting in to no avail.
" Yeah I agree with what you're saying. But seriously, not all females are bad, only some. I've a living example right by my side now." Kenshin irritated Kaoru deliberately. That does it, Kaoru stormed out the studio in a huff.
"LOSER!!!" Kenshin jeered at her. He was smiling from ear to ear. He turned. Everybody was staring accusingly at him.
"Ken! Did you pay that darn guy to call in? You are too much! She's after all a girl! How can you embarrass her like that?!" Saitou reprimanded Kenshin harshly.
"I didn't!" Kenshin retorted.
"Yeah, I'm not born yesterday k? Now how am I supposed to explain to the listeners and the media and the WHOLE OF JAPAN?! Arrrrgggghhhhh, headache!!!" Saitou, exasperated.
"Know what? I've got the perfect solution for you. I QUIT! You shouldn't
have any headaches now..." Kenshin threw his work pass at Saitou and left
off in a huff.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Following Day,Kaoru had gotten used to tuning in to "Black Discs Express" ever since her conflict with Kenshin. She had rushed home in order not to miss Kenshin's program. She settled down at home and tuned in to the bandwidth, only to realise that Kenshin's program is gone. She was unhappy about it and questioned the radio station about it.
"Why in the world Himura Kenshin's Black Discs Express not on the radio now?" She demanded.
"He quitted." Hearing this, Kaoru ended the call. There's this feeling deep within her that's been telling her that Kenshin lost his job because of her. She was pretty affected by Kenshin.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Meanwhile over at Kenshin's,
Kenshin's dead bored! Radio DJing is practically his second life. Tired and bored, he left his house. He suddenly caught sight of newspapers lying outside his neighbours' house. He took the section with Kaoru's writing to read. He had actually not been comfortable without reading Kaoru's writing for a day. Love has blossomed in the midst of their conflict.
He decided to make a trip to the library for a day of reading past Kaoru's column writings. He was pretty impressed by her writings.
"Hey Kenshin! How you doin man? I'm really upset over your resignation. There's piles and piles of letters lying on the reception requesting your return. How about joining us again? Radio DJing is your second life." Saitou offered.
"Ermmm... I'll give myself a probation period then. 3 days. How about it?" Kenshin suggested.
"No problem! Whatever you say man! Welcome back! Want me to give you a hug?" Saitou asked cheekily.
"Er... No thanks..." Kenshin said.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Back At Kaoru's,
"What?! There are news that Himura Kenshin that DJ is coming back?" Kaoru exclaimed. Her joy cannot be concealed. She was so happy that she started whistling.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
That Night,
"Hello! It's me again! I'm back! I know that my mouth really stinks to all the fans of Kaoru. Do you hear a sound? Yeah, that's me chewing stink-gum. Chewing gum refreshes your breath, well stink-gum makes your mouth stinks. I'm calling truce with Kaoru as of this very second, this very minute, this very hour, this very day, this very year. Let's now listen to a song. It's "Truce by BeesGees". "Kenshin said. Kaoru, who's listening to the radio, was pleased.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Rrrrringgggg!" The phone rang. Kaoru reached her hand out from her bed tiredly for the phone.
"Hello?" Kaoru murmured.
"I supposed that you do eat..." Kenshin said.
"How in the world did you get my number?" Kaoru was immediately awake.
"Heck about that! City Plaza, Taxi Stand. See you there at 2 p.m." Kenshin ended the call leaving Kaoru in a daze.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
That was their first date. Nemesis turned lovers cases are darn often. I leave it up to your active imagination to imagine the rest.
P.S. WRITE REVIEWS!!!