"Camerman! Pay attention to me!" Chris said annoyed at the cameraman. "So all of the losers that nobody cares about will be back and compete in stuff to win something and they'll still be losers because they aren't me. Join me in the act of watching me, on Total Flanderized Island!"
"So the first loser is here, B!" Chris said. B walked down and stared at Chris, waiting for his introduction. "Nobody care about you whatsyourface, I'm the only reason this show is good."
B glared at the host and walked away to the end of the dock. "'I have successfully used a teleportation spell to be the first person here" Leonard said. "Of course I had no doubt on accomplishing this feat"
"Whatever Leonard. Stand over there now." Chris said. "The next person is here!"
"Hey Chris!" Owen said happily. "Can I have some food?" Owen asked.
"No, go stand by the wizard guy" Chris said. Sky then walked off the next boat as well. "Hello Sky"
"Hi Chris. I hope to win this time and not lose to Shawn" Sky stated.
"Yeah whatever. You are obsessed with winning and have a stupid relationship thing with Dave" Chris said waving her off.
"Did somebody say winning!?" Tyler asked as he ran onto the dock, only to trip and fall into the water next to the others, getting them wet. "I meant to do that" He said.
"Hi Chris!" Topher said walking off the next boat. "You are just an amazing stupendous handsome attractive man" He then whispered into Chris's ear. "I want to be inside of you"
Chris backed away from Topher. "DJ, protect me!" He said shoving DJ at Topher, not caring at all about the taller teen.
"Why did Chris push me?" DJ asked tearing up before crying.
"QUIT CRYING YOU WUSS!" Eva shouted angrily as she kicked DJ and Topher out of her way. They landed next to the others, who backed away from Eva in fear.
"Yeah! I'm ninth contestant to get here!" Trent said happily prancing off the boat he was on. "And I'm the ninth person to talk!" He said happily. He noticed Tyler climbing up. "No! You need to wait for another person to show up!" He said angrily. "Or I'll cut you up into nine pieces."
"Hope that none of you plan to win" Jo said sneering. "Because all of you better enjoy second place"
"I better get ninth place!" Trent shouted angrily.
"Can't we all just get along? Maybe we can sing a happy song" Ella sang as she danced next to the others.
"No! We will only do what Chris says!" Topher said. "For he is my waifu."
"You must be a real loser then if you want Chris to be your wife" Heather said laughing.
"Don't you dare insult Chris!" Topher said tackling Heather to the ground.
"BEAT HER UP! YEAH!" Eva shouted happily.
Noah noticed this while reading. He walked around Topher getting his butt kicked and rolled his eyes. "This is so nice to be back" He said sarcastically.
"Why would you say that?" Scott said. "My pappy and I both regret having me sign up for this crappy show"
"Have you ever heard of sarcasm?" Noah asked not looking up.
"No what is it?" Scott asked.
"Can we keep moving on instead of focusing on Scott's lack of intelligence?" Chris asked. "And let's focus on Mike's lack of character"
"Hi guys!" Mike said. "Is Zoey here yet?" He asked looking around.
"Yeah, you just missed her." Noah said rolling his eyes.
"She went into the woods? I'm coming Zoey!" Mike said running off the dock and onto the island.
Beardo walked onto the dock making a TA-DA noise. "So? What else?" Heather asked.
Beardo frowned and started to make a violin noise. "SPEAK NORMAL!" Eva shouted punching Beardo in the face. The larger teen was sent flying back and into the forest.
"I love it when you teens do stupid and violent things to each other" Chris said. "We should get a ton of that with Dave now here!"
"The germs are coming!" Dave said shivering. "And girls are germs, just meaner ones"
"Sexist pig number 2 huh!? You must die!" Eva shouted throwing Dave into the woods as well.
"Sexism is wrong." Dakota said as she posed for the camera.
"When did you get here?" Chris asked pushing her aside.
"When everybody was watching Dave fall into the woods" Dakota said now giving the camera the duck face.
"My great great great great great great great great great great great great great grandaunt invented the duck face" Staci said getting into Dakota and Chris personal space.
"You are ANNOYING!" Eva said grabbing Staci and throwing her into the woods as well.
"You would be very helpful in a zombie apocalypse" Shawn said. "If only you wore gloves." He said.
"Oh my Codykins! Shawn, I was so rooting for you in the finale because Cody wasn't competing, besides where is Cody?" Sierra asked looking around hyperly.
"He hasn't shown up yet" DJ said shivering in fear.
"Don't lie to me about my Codykins!" Sierra said angrily jumping onto DJ's head.
"Mama!" DJ screamed running into the woods with Sierra punching him in the eye.
"What are you Samey loving losers looking at?" Amy asked annoyed.
"Just a wannabe Samey" Heather said laughing.
"I am nothing like that Samey! She is a one dimensional character who has no life!" Amy said.
"Hey babes" Cody said getting close to the girls. "He grab Eva and Ella and pulled them closer."
"Do not touch me!" Eva shouted picking up Cody and then throwing him.
"Chris, I'm suing you for having me not compete the last season" Courtney said angrily.
"Yo homeboys" Ezekiel said walking off the next boat. "The hot dames are here" He said.
"Shut up you sexist pig!" Eva shouted angrily. She then threw him out into the woods.
"Throw me next, you ugly orgish ten lover!" Trent said. She then punched Trent as well.
"Hi, I'm Sammy" Sammy said walking down the game.
"Great, that loser Samey is here" Amy said getting into Sammy's face.
"ShaSlide!" Lightning said sliding onto the dock. He and the twins landed on Eva.
"Get off me!" Eva shouted throwing the three of them.
"Was that Tyler?" Lindsay asked.
"Yes, Tyler is a black guy and two twin girls" Noah said rolling his eyes.
"I'll save you Tyler!" Lindsay shouted running past the real Tyler.
"Wait Lindsay!" Tyler said chasing Lindsay into the woods.
Rodney stared at everybody as he walked towards them all. "Are you okay you loser?" Heather asked snapping in his face.
"I you touched love my heart" Rodney said.
"Make sense!" Eva said punching Roney causing him to fly as well.
"Your love I punch" Rodney shouted.
Cameron walked down as well. "I have never seen somebody of Russian descendant before in my life" Cameron said wide eyed.
"Weirdo." Heather said backing away from Cameron.
"RACIST!" Eva shouted as she threw Cameron into the woods.
Brick then walked down the dock. "A fellow soldier! I'll save you!" Brick said running into the woods.
"Where is Mike?" Zoey asked.
"He went into the forest looking for you" Noah said.
"I'm coming in Mike!" Zoey said running into the woods as well.
"I have returned!" Max said. "I have returned!"
"The real star has appeared!" Blaineley said shoving Max and Chris out of the way.
"How dare you attack Chris!" Topher yelled as he tackled Blaineley. They then landed on Eva.
Eva then threw Blaineley and Topher into the woods. "Crikey mate! " Jasmine said shocked. "You are more angry than a kangaroo with a 30 year old joey"
"What?" Eva asked. "ARE YOU CALLING ME OLD!? DIE BITCH!" Eva then punched Jasmine, sending her flying into the woods as well.
"Is Courtney here?" Gwen asked running off the dock and tackling Courtney.
"Get off me or I will sue you!" Courtney shouted.
Sadie then walked out then. "Where are you Katie!?" Sadie shouted. "Are you in the woods Katie!?" Sadie asked running into the woods.
"Did I hear Sadie?" Katie asked as she walked off the next boat.
"You just missed her" Courtney said pointing to the woods.
"I'll save you Sadie!" Katie said now running into the woods.
Sugar then walked off the boat. "Oh my god! You look so purtty!" She said to Anne Maria who got off the next boat as well.
"Thanks doll" Anne Maria said. "I know that people can't be as sexy as me" Anne Maria said.
"I am a thousand times purttier than you" Sugar said getting into Anne Maria's face. The two girls then began to fight.
Izzy jumped into the battle as she appeared out of nowhere. She pulled out a grenade and stuffed it in Anne Maria's hair. Anne Maria's hair was able to shield everybody except for Izzy, Anne Maria and Sugar, who then flew into the woods.
"Is everyone alright?" Dawn asked. "I sense that your auras are all shaken by the explosion" She said.
"When did you get here" Chris asked shoving Dawn out of the way.
"I was here all along" Dawn said.
"I am pretty sure you weren't" Chris said as Dawn shrugged.
Bridgette and Geoff were the next to arrive. They began to make out once they saw one another.
Beth was the next person to arrive. "Hi guys..." Beth said.
"Shut up and notice me!" Justin said flailing his arms around. "I am hot!"
Alejandro walked off the boat next and stood infront of Justin. "Hola amigos" He said before starring at Heather.
"I'm ugly!" Justin said crying.
Harold ran off the dock, to pull out a yoyo. "Gosh you idiots! Nobody cares about the guy characters like you except if they are shipping Noco"
"You do realize that you are indeed incorrect because Noah is one of the most popular character even when you exclude the people who ship him with Cody."
"Hi guys!" Sam said walking off the next boat playing Pokemon Black.
"Gosh! You are such an idiot! Do you not know that Pokemon only good games were Red and Blue!?" Harold yelled.
"You do realize that Pokemon Red and Blue also had a sister game in Japan called Green right?" Scarlett asked. "Meaning that you are incorrect of stating that Red and Blue are the only good games when you forget the almost identical Pokemon Green"
"Stop derailing my arguement with facts!" Harold said angrily.
Sam was crying on the floor of the dock. "You hurt Sam! You must die!" Dakota said growing in size and kicking Harold. She also ended up kicking Scarlett, Bridgette, Justin, Alejandro, and Beth.
"BRIDGETTE!" Geoff said running into the woods to find his girlfriend to make out with her.
"You did not just kick my sweet baby!" Leshawna said angrily. "Somebody hold my earrings!" She said throwing her earrings at Eva. Eva caught them and crushed them.
"Aw hell, no!" Leshawna said jumping on Eva. Eva kicked Leshawna in the face and sent her flying into the woods.
"Duncan is still in jail, so we have him controlling this crappy robot!" Chris said.
"Aww, I wanted to sue him!" Courtney said.
"Nice to see you too princess." Duncan said as the crappy robot had a video of him.
"Alright, we shall start our next challenge now, except it will also be next week!" Chris said "On Total… Drama… Flanderized Island!"