A Signs parody (sorta)
Attack of the evil aliens that want to do our laundry and steal all of our underwear and they also want to harvest our bodies for their own benefit part I
By : I.C.K.C.M.
I awoke to the sound of dogs barking and children screaming, and as I reluctantly got up to check on what was going on the cool morning spring air blew in through the open window where I saw my son running into the cornfield chasing after our two Chihuahuas, I went downstairs to get a hot cup of coffee, black just as I liked it. After I poured myself a cup of the steaming hot liquid I went outside walking past our swing set into the cornfield walking down the well trodden path I have walked so many times before until I finally saw my 9 year old sun up ahead, as I walked up to him I asked what all the commotion was about and my son he just reached up and turned my head toward a large clearing that I don't remember having in our field but then I noticed it standing in the middle of the clearing glistening in the sunlight like the top of some bald guys head was a.. STOP SIGN! As I screamed I could see my sons astonished look on his face as he stared at me and cthen clamped a hand over my mouth saying "DAD! Shut it! You scream as if you were a tortured weasel!"
Dad: oh sorry
Son: whatever
Dad: this sign could only mean one thing!
Son: no not that!
Dad: yes son!
Son: no anything but that!
Dad: I'm sorry but yes
Son: no!
Dad: yes!
Son: no
Dad: yes
Son: no no no no no
Dad: yes yes yes yes yes yes yes
Son: no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no
Dad: yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes
Son: no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no
Dad: yes times one-thousand
Son: .......
Dad: HA I win!
Son: No times infinity
Dad: ooohhh fiddlesticks
Dad: Goshgollygeewhillakers son why do you always have to do that?
Son: haha
Dad: fine if your so smart what does it mean?
Son: it means the heavy metal band "the enraged gooses*" are coming back..
Dad: what?
Son: ok not really but it means aliens are coming.. And they want to do our laundry and steal all our underwear!!
Dad: nnooooo!!!
Dad: wait how do you know that?
Son: duuhh its in the script.
Father: oh.. well who the hell wrote this script? My god what an idiot! father: well anyway ..
Father: what do we do?!?!?!?
Son: we must board up our house and place guards around the perimeter, for the only creatures that the acid saliva, poisen fanged, huge clawed 9 ft. killer psycho aliens fear is the one evil animal race that we call .. Chipmunks. Dad: yay were saved!!!!
On the alien mother ship
Mother alien: Rupert I told you no computer games till after you r done practicing harvesting humanoid life forms!
Little alien Rupert: but mooom!
Mother alien: RUPERT IF I HAVE TO TELL YOU ONE MORE TIME ILL DO MORE THAN HARVEST YOUR LITTLE BOTTEM!!!
Little alien Rupert: awww gee whiz mom.
Mother alien: NOOWW!!!!!
Little alien Rupert: ohh ok.
*a voice says*
back on earth in a secret military base that no one knows about except the people inside of course. and the president and I bet the president goldfish knows cause he would of over heard the president talking about it (by the way the presidents goldfish's name is Jake) and u know my grandma probably knows case she says she knows everything and I bet that my grandmas cat-- *aiieee * *gasp * * ehhh ow ow ow ow * ehem * new voice * sorry about that we have now taken care of the announcer I am your new announcer so hi there my name is Fred I like announcing.. you know the first time I ever announced was when I was a only little lad of three years old an ----- * erhhh * * bonk bonk bonk* * ow that hur--- * *another voice * ok sorry now back to the story.. * back on earth in a secret military base that no one knows about which is commanded by a certain general Howard U. Doing (say it out loud) in the generals office..
Ensign Pavel* General Howard U. Doing we have sighted an unidentified flying object
General: well im doing quite good how bout you? And would u mind calling me by my full na-what!?!? A UFO?!?!
Ensign pavel: no sir an unidentified flying object
General: *looks at ensign in disgust * yeah.. right
General: well go get me a report or something and get busy!!
Ensign pavel: right away sir!
(yes pavel for all you treckie fans!)
later on in the command deck of the secret base that no one knows about except for all those people mentioned earlier. the general enters..
Captain shirk: good evening general Howard U. Doing
General: quite well yourself?
Captain Shirk: what?
General : and I would like it if you addressed me with me full name instead of asking me how im doing every time you see me!
Captain Shirk: but sir
General: no excuses!!!
Captain Shirk: *sigh *
General : what was that!
Captain Shirk: nothing.
General: good, that's what I thought!
General: now whats the report on the UFO's?
Captain shirk: you mean the unidentified flying objects?
General: YES YES!
Captain shirk: they disappeared
General: * gasp *
cue scary music and zoom in for effect *
general: but how?.
well that's the end of this part I really had a lot of fun writing this and if guys wanna hear about the farmer and his son recruiting their chipmunk army give me some reviews and well have attack of the evil psycho aliens that want to do our laundry and steal all of our underwear . and they also wanna harvest our bodies for their own evil benefit part II !!! YAY!!
And guys remember " save our forests.. wipe your ass with an owl"
I.C.K.C.M. (for all you people that don't know what this stands for it stands for "Insane Chipmunk Killing Chainsaw Maniac" yep that's me! I luv you all!
Attack of the evil aliens that want to do our laundry and steal all of our underwear and they also want to harvest our bodies for their own benefit part I
By : I.C.K.C.M.
I awoke to the sound of dogs barking and children screaming, and as I reluctantly got up to check on what was going on the cool morning spring air blew in through the open window where I saw my son running into the cornfield chasing after our two Chihuahuas, I went downstairs to get a hot cup of coffee, black just as I liked it. After I poured myself a cup of the steaming hot liquid I went outside walking past our swing set into the cornfield walking down the well trodden path I have walked so many times before until I finally saw my 9 year old sun up ahead, as I walked up to him I asked what all the commotion was about and my son he just reached up and turned my head toward a large clearing that I don't remember having in our field but then I noticed it standing in the middle of the clearing glistening in the sunlight like the top of some bald guys head was a.. STOP SIGN! As I screamed I could see my sons astonished look on his face as he stared at me and cthen clamped a hand over my mouth saying "DAD! Shut it! You scream as if you were a tortured weasel!"
Dad: oh sorry
Son: whatever
Dad: this sign could only mean one thing!
Son: no not that!
Dad: yes son!
Son: no anything but that!
Dad: I'm sorry but yes
Son: no!
Dad: yes!
Son: no
Dad: yes
Son: no no no no no
Dad: yes yes yes yes yes yes yes
Son: no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no
Dad: yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes
Son: no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no
Dad: yes times one-thousand
Son: .......
Dad: HA I win!
Son: No times infinity
Dad: ooohhh fiddlesticks
Dad: Goshgollygeewhillakers son why do you always have to do that?
Son: haha
Dad: fine if your so smart what does it mean?
Son: it means the heavy metal band "the enraged gooses*" are coming back..
Dad: what?
Son: ok not really but it means aliens are coming.. And they want to do our laundry and steal all our underwear!!
Dad: nnooooo!!!
Dad: wait how do you know that?
Son: duuhh its in the script.
Father: oh.. well who the hell wrote this script? My god what an idiot! father: well anyway ..
Father: what do we do?!?!?!?
Son: we must board up our house and place guards around the perimeter, for the only creatures that the acid saliva, poisen fanged, huge clawed 9 ft. killer psycho aliens fear is the one evil animal race that we call .. Chipmunks. Dad: yay were saved!!!!
On the alien mother ship
Mother alien: Rupert I told you no computer games till after you r done practicing harvesting humanoid life forms!
Little alien Rupert: but mooom!
Mother alien: RUPERT IF I HAVE TO TELL YOU ONE MORE TIME ILL DO MORE THAN HARVEST YOUR LITTLE BOTTEM!!!
Little alien Rupert: awww gee whiz mom.
Mother alien: NOOWW!!!!!
Little alien Rupert: ohh ok.
*a voice says*
back on earth in a secret military base that no one knows about except the people inside of course. and the president and I bet the president goldfish knows cause he would of over heard the president talking about it (by the way the presidents goldfish's name is Jake) and u know my grandma probably knows case she says she knows everything and I bet that my grandmas cat-- *aiieee * *gasp * * ehhh ow ow ow ow * ehem * new voice * sorry about that we have now taken care of the announcer I am your new announcer so hi there my name is Fred I like announcing.. you know the first time I ever announced was when I was a only little lad of three years old an ----- * erhhh * * bonk bonk bonk* * ow that hur--- * *another voice * ok sorry now back to the story.. * back on earth in a secret military base that no one knows about which is commanded by a certain general Howard U. Doing (say it out loud) in the generals office..
Ensign Pavel* General Howard U. Doing we have sighted an unidentified flying object
General: well im doing quite good how bout you? And would u mind calling me by my full na-what!?!? A UFO?!?!
Ensign pavel: no sir an unidentified flying object
General: *looks at ensign in disgust * yeah.. right
General: well go get me a report or something and get busy!!
Ensign pavel: right away sir!
(yes pavel for all you treckie fans!)
later on in the command deck of the secret base that no one knows about except for all those people mentioned earlier. the general enters..
Captain shirk: good evening general Howard U. Doing
General: quite well yourself?
Captain Shirk: what?
General : and I would like it if you addressed me with me full name instead of asking me how im doing every time you see me!
Captain Shirk: but sir
General: no excuses!!!
Captain Shirk: *sigh *
General : what was that!
Captain Shirk: nothing.
General: good, that's what I thought!
General: now whats the report on the UFO's?
Captain shirk: you mean the unidentified flying objects?
General: YES YES!
Captain shirk: they disappeared
General: * gasp *
cue scary music and zoom in for effect *
general: but how?.
well that's the end of this part I really had a lot of fun writing this and if guys wanna hear about the farmer and his son recruiting their chipmunk army give me some reviews and well have attack of the evil psycho aliens that want to do our laundry and steal all of our underwear . and they also wanna harvest our bodies for their own evil benefit part II !!! YAY!!
And guys remember " save our forests.. wipe your ass with an owl"
I.C.K.C.M. (for all you people that don't know what this stands for it stands for "Insane Chipmunk Killing Chainsaw Maniac" yep that's me! I luv you all!