A friend challenged me to write drabbles cos I'm terrible at it. So, here is one that she's set. It was supposed to be: Write me a 800 word fic about Jem and Theresa having a final heart to heart before Jem is turned into a Silent Brother.

But because there already is a scene like that in the book, I decided to write something a bit different from the prompt. Hope you like it. Please review!

My beloved Tessa,

More than 33 hours have passed since you were taken from us. Every fibre of my being longs to see you returned safely home. My heart yearns to leap from this sickbed, saddle a horse and tear after Mortmain. But, alas, my body betrays me. I must stay behind, though I have sent Will in my stead.

Did you know, my Tessa, that Will is in love with you? In a way, I am glad of it, for you will have each other when I am gone. I release you from your promise to me. I hope you will find it in your heart to love him. I know he can make you happy, and nothing could give me greater joy. I wish for you to go on living, even if it is without me. I pray that you will find happiness – true happiness – and a long-lasting love that you deserve.

I am dying, Tessa. For six years, I have heard those words spoken to me and by me. Now, at last, they are coming true. I can feel it. A fire is burning through my veins. My own blood has been turned against me. Every movement is agony. I wish you were here, my love, to be my ministering angel. Perhaps this would have been easier to bear.

I fear my death, Tessa. I fear what it will do to you, and Will, and others I leave behind – Charlotte, Henry and Sophie, even Gabriel, Gideon and Cecily. There is so much more I wish to do before I die. I cannot leave you all behind without being certain that you will be alright.

So, I have made a decision. I will inform Charlotte of it when she returns. Tessa, I am going to take the path of the Silent Brothers. It may be a life devoid of light and music, but I must do all I can. I cannot give in to an inevitable fate. When the Brothers come, I will ask them to place their runes on me. Perhaps it will hasten my agonising death. Perhaps it will open up a new life.

Whatever happens, my Tessa, do not grieve overmuch for me. One must do one's best with what one has been dealt with in life. I hope I have managed to do so.

I hear footsteps coming down the hallway. I believe it is Charlotte. Of late, it seems she bears the weight of the world on her shoulders. Though I am reluctant to put more burden on her, I will place this letter in her hands, in the hope that it will find its way to you, Tessa.

Mizpah, my Tessa. Be strong, for my sake. I pray we will find each other again, in this world or the next.

Till then, with all my love, I remain, your
Jem