Disclaimer: If I owned Wicked, I would have been able to finish the novel. And I still haven't read the first part of "In the Vinkus."): It's just soooo boring. I like the "City of Emeralds" part better. And "Gillikin".

It was everyone's first day back at Shiz after a way too short summer. No one was ready for the academic pressure yet. Except, of course, Elphaba.

Especially Dr. Dillamond's first period class. Nineteen out of the twenty students in the class were slumped over in their chairs, wishing they didn't have to listen to History lectures at eight-thirty in the morning. Nessarose, Boq, Avaric, Fiyero and Galinda were all bored out of their skulls—and they had only been attempting to pay attention (and failing) for fifteen minutes. Only when the Goat, clearly irritated with his students, declared, "I have an announcement that has nothing to do with this class," did they perk up.

Elphaba sighed and rolled her eyes. The whole point of this class was to learn about History, not hear announcements about random things.

Dillamond started pacing. "I do not wish to interrupt my class with this frivolous news, but Madame Morrible has ordered me to tell you all this." He paused for effect. "Shiz University, perhaps the most prestigious college in all of Oz—"

"Get to the point!" Avaric called from the back row.

"All right, I will. As I was saying, Shiz University has many new sports teams this semester. We have a croquet team, volleyball, golf and several others. There are flyers on the bulletin board down the hall if any of you are interested in trying out."

"Wow, a croquet team." Fiyero said, just loud enough for all his friends to hear. "I'm so psyched. At this point, history is more interesting."

Dillamond ignored the muffled laughs coming from the back row of his classroom and continued. "Madame Morrible also wanted me to tell you that we will also be having a football team this fall. She thought Shiz should be respected for not only our knowledge, but also our athletic talent as—"

"YES!" Fiyero shouted, unable to stop himself. "Finally, a point for going here!"

He was ignored once more by the professor.

"As well. Now, does anybody have any questions?"

Galinda waved her hand in the air.

"Yes, Glinda?"

She rolled her eyes. "Please, it's Ga-linda. With an 'uh'. Like as in 'duh, my name isn't Glinda."

"Would you like to ask your question or continue to waste class time?"

"Fine, I'll ask." Galinda snapped. "Professor, what, uh, is football?"

Several of the boys groaned. Elphaba, not wanting class time to go to waste, quickly called from her desk in the front, "You can ask Fiyero later."

She turned brightly to her boyfriend. "Well?"

"It's complicated. You can read the rulebook later." Fiyero told her quickly, not wanting to get stuck with the job of explaining the complex rules of football. (So complicated that our authoress is going to be having a swell time writing all the game details later. Not.)

"Yes, thank you, Elphaba." Dillamond beamed at his favorite student. "Any more questions?"

Avaric raised his hand, but called out anyway. "How many teams are we having? Like, varsity and NV?"

"I believe we're just having one team per grade. There will be tryouts, however, so no one automatically makes the team. "

Avaric nodded and leaned back in his seat, confident of his spot. He was one of the best athletes in the grade, second only to Fiyero.

Dillamond pursed his lips, making it clear he disapproved of the football team entirely. "Are there any more questions? If not, I'd like to return to the lesson."

He didn't actually give them that much choice to ask anything else before picking up his notes and started lecturing them on History again.

AN: How do you like it? It will get funnier, promise. And I need help thinking of a Shiz Team thingy. The mascot? No idea what it's called. But, like, the Dolphin part of the Miami Dolphins, that kind of thing. Please help! I will post your name if I like your idea best! Thanks!

-- jMac girl