Taking on Hell.
The Faded Memories of a Distant Dream.
Chapter One
If you look the word 'addiction' in the dictionary you will come up with being abnormally tolerant to and dependent on something. What they don't tell you is if you want to beat that addiction you have hell to pay.
My addiction? Well a very abnormal one, blood. Not just any blood but human blood. You have no idea what I went through to get this far. The disheartening thing is I'm no way near ready. Even after 40 years it's not gone away. Oh, sure the humans are not in trouble anymore when I'm in control but when I'm not, or blood is involved, there are no guarantees everyone will make it out alive. My addiction began once the Cullen's took me in.
I sat in our new room; it had a double bed and a great view, just want Alice wanted. I looked around with amazement; this room was so … grand! Back with Maria it was a basement training ground with nothing but the essentials that I needed to create killers. However this, this was full of life and care, not something I was used to.
"Something wrong?" Instincts took over and I flew to the opposite wall of the door, where my intruder was. I took one look and released a breath I didn't know I was holding. It was only Edward.
"Don't do that!" I growled, walking back to the bed and sitting down, but still on edge.
"Calm, my brother, you are not in a battle zone anymore." He said, walking forward and leaning on the wall in front of me.
"I know, I just don't like new places, it makes me edgy." I moaned. To distract my frazzled mind I got up and opened a box that carried all my miniscule belongings. It contained one set of spare clothes, my uniform from my days in the confederate army; I could never bring myself to get rid of the one thing left of my human life and the picture Alice took of her and I when I asked her to marry me. Her smile was the greatest gift I could ever ask for.
"That's all you have?" My mid flew back to the present situation and noticed Edward looking in my box. I closed it slowly and nodded sheepishly.
"Yeah, I never really cared much for possessions, we couldn't become our own person with Maria." He seemed to think then and I picked up on enthusiasm coming at me in waves.
"Well, what things do you like?"
"As in?" I asked, confused.
"Well, what hobbies do you enjoy, what clothes do you like?"
"I… I… err" Now that I thought I didn't really know, I had forgotten what I had done as a human to pass time. I tried to think as hard as I could, visions of music, strings, strumming.
"I think I played guitar, when I was human, it seems right to me." He nodded in understanding. I tried to think of anything else I did or liked as a human.
"I can't think of anything else, my memories have dwindled, I barely know who I was now." I shook my head, frustrated at myself.
"You are thinking too hard, brother, just off the top of your head tell me what you like." He smiled; sending me an emotion I only ever got off Alice… it must be love.
"Cowboy boots, they remind me of home," I winked.
"Very well, Jasper, I will leave you in peace, I will be in the room opposite should you need help." I nodded, silently thanking him in my thoughts.
"No need to thank me, it's what I'm here for." He gave me one last smile then departed the room. I sighed and returned to looking around the space I could now call home. My eyes took in every detail, not wanting to miss any of the magnificence that coated every corner. I stopped when my eyes drifted over a mirror that was built into a desk. My own eyes blazed back at me, red as ruby but with none of the charm, they were the eyes of a killer, of one who had seen too many lives taken at his own hands. They were the eyes that shouldn't have been mine to begin with. I should have died years ago, an old man, peacefully in my sleep. Yet it seems there was no place for me in any world: Human or Vampire alike. I got up and slumped closer to the mirror, focusing more intently on those blood red eyes. I took one look and remembered what I had done to make them such a violent colour… and I liked it. I mean the joy you get from human blood is just indescribable. The more I thought the more I wanted it, not to kill but just to feel them moments of happiness. It filled my up and refused to leave me alone. I couldn't live without it. I had to hunt.