Ever since Mami's parents died in the car accident that made her a Puella Magi, she's felt like she's dead as well.
It's strange, because she's always hyper-aware of the blood running through her veins, of just how alive she is. It's always lingering at the back of her mind, the fact that she is alive and her parents are not. And yet at the same time, there are moments when she's walking and all of a sudden it hits her again in a rush—myparentsaredeadtheydiedthey'redead—and it's like iron hits her lungs. All her breath leaves her and she goes just as cold as they are, and she feels like she's been stricken down by some higher force.
Oh, she knows every day that she could die. She knew the deal going in—to save her life by risking it. She could join her parents at any moment. That is, if she hasn't already.
...
Her wish was simple.
I don't want to die alone...
Simple enough, but she always feels like she's alone even if she is alive.
And then there is Madoka, who presses close as she follows her through the darkness of the witch's portal. Madoka, who wants to be just like her.
Madoka, who offers to be her partner.
Mami is overcome by emotion as she spins around and grasps Madoka's hands—warm, she notices off-handedly. Warmer than hers.
"You really want to fight alongside me from now on?" she asks, almost pleadingly, praying this isn't some kind of dream. "Will you be by my side?"
Tears fill her eyes, thick and hot.
"If someone like me can do it, then yes," Madoka answers gently, smiling.
I'm not alone.
When was the last time she thought that? When was the last time she could think that?
It's all Mami can do to stop herself from breaking down in tears at the realization.
I'm not alone anymore.
...
When she dies, she feels her hands go cold again.
I'm...not alone...
The only thing she really regrets that now she's leaving Madoka to be alone, just like she was.
i was planning to write someone besides mami, since most of the fics are about mami. but eh. at least i included someone else this time.
again, i want to write a lot lot lot for this fandom. and honestly, i really want to write a bunch of yuri for this fandom. lol. stay tuned.