A/N: I had to put this on here. I hate the way to killed off Lexa. That they killed her off in the first place. I could just imagine this happening to Clarke and I wanted to share it with you. As short as it might be. This will be all for this little story. No more chapters.
It has been months since Lexa died in her arms. She has spent them trying to forget about her. She simply couldn't. Everywhere she went the memory of Lexa went with her. One night she and Jasper spend time smoking the cigarettes they found in Polis and drinking homemade whisky. That was the first time she forgot Lexa a little. Her blood had practically turned to whisky at that moment but at least she wasn't thinking about Lexa. About the way those green eyes could look at her. About the was Lexa's hands felt soft and strong on her skin. About the soft lips that would press against her. Tears streamed down Clarke's face as she took another drink of whisky straight from the bottle.
Who would Lexa have been today? What would they've been together? Clarke couldn't believe that Lexa was actually gone. That it had reached this point. It isn't fair she died too young. Nobody could take Lexa's place in this world. There would be a new commander. A new person sitting on that throne but it wouldn't be Lexa.
From a distance Abby was watching her daughter drink her pain away a little at a time. She wasn't the biggest Lexa fan but when Clarke returned to Arkadia with the message that Lexa had passed the pain was so obvious. There was so much more between Lexa and Clarke that she was aware off. Watching her daughter reach for the next bottle she moved towards "take it easy" she moved her hand to her daughters shoulder.
"Let me be" Clarke mumbled almost inaudible.
Abby sat down next to her daughter and looked at the girl that used to be so full of life. Determined to bring peace to everyone but also not afraid to make the hard choices. Clarke was just a shell of who she used to be. Ignoring Clarke's previous remark she wrapped her arm around her daughter "you loved her didn't you?"
Clarke wept silently pressing the bottle against her lips again. She was lost and no longer looking for the way out. She found it in the clear brown liquid. Clarke was drinking her pain away. She never got drunk enough to get Lexa off her mind until this night. After Abby left her daughter Clarke decided it was time to pull the trigger. She moved the bottle to her lips and drank as much as she could. Until her body couldn't handle it anymore. Finally she drank away Lexa's memory.
In the morning Octavia found Clarke faced down in her pillow clutching the strand of Lexa's hair. Death had come for Clarke. Nobody knew how much Clarke had been blaming herself for Lexa's death. How the mix of missing her, the guilt of not being able to safe her and the sorrow tore her up inside. Sharing the sad news with Abby Arkadia went into mourning. People suggested burying her in the camp funeral ground but Octavia insisted on a different place. The place she knew Clarke would want to be. Under the willow tree next to Lexa. It took some convincing but finally TriKru and SkaiKru agreed. It surprised the Sky People how many grounders showed up to see Clarke off on her final journey.
The bright light was hurting Clarke's eyes. Her body felt lighter than it had ever felt before. Like she was floating. Moving forward slowly and cautiously she tried to comprehend where she was. The room looked familiar but Clarke couldn't recall the memory. When Lexa appeared in front of her she knew. Lexa's hair was hanging lose over her right shoulder her hands toying with it. A smile appeared on her face when she moved closer "Clarke. You're here". The way Lexa said her name with the K sounding so clearly brought Clarke to tears.
She lunged herself into Lexa's arms feeling liberated "I'm here. I'm home"