So I have this friend (LoonyCrone) whose first language is NOT English. But I like to believe that over the years I have been a good influence on said friend- who henceforth shall be labelled as LC- in various arenas like good TV shows (Merlin), English fanfics (Spoiler alert- LC is well versed in reading and writing fanfics in their native tongue) and confidence in English. So much so that after one of our many spirited discussions on Merlin, including how terribly, utterly, gorgeously hawt the leads are- LC decided to write a Merlin fic in English.
What followed was a week's worth of drafts and re-drafts, edits and re-edits, throwing around arguments and plot ideas like popcorn and several impassionate speeches on English grammar and vernacular from yours truly. P.S. I won't lie but the first reading made me want to gouge my eyes out! But as I read more I saw how LC managed to find the flow of the language and use it effectively and beautifully to present the plot.
So here it is- the product of many nightmares- the first every fiction in English by Loony Crone.
Direct your comments on the story to LC and those on the edits (tenses and syntax) to me.
Hope you enjoy the read.
Destiny was a weird thing. To Merlin, destiny was Arthur, or to be more accurate, it was the creation of Albion and the rehabilitation of magic in this newly created Kingdom. But- to be honest, at this point this was not something that was going to happen any time soon.
Merlin could still remember the battle of Camlann. It had been … terrible, for the lack of a better word. He had lost his powers right before the war (all due to Morgana's slug), and had to abandon his friend. His King. Arthur. He could still remember the eyes of his King filling with resignation and horror when he came to the conclusion that Merlin was abandoning him. But Merlin had gone to the crystal caves and had gotten his powers back just in time. After that he had rushed to Arthur and had, somehow managed to save him. Arthur had been mortally wounded, but Merlin still in his 'Emrys disguise' had brought him to Avalon.
It was there, in the middle of the lake that his first love emerged from the foam. Freya came to him, surfing on a wave. She came when he called her, and she saved Arthur without hesitation, without expectations or hope for a reward. Emrys had then turned to Arthur and said, "Wait here, your servant will bring you back to Camelot." Then he had disappeared, leaving the King behind, breathless and furious. Arthur had the time to shout, "I'm letting you live today"; before the shape of the wizard vanished in the forest. Merlin had done everything for him, yet Arthur was unable to accept magic.
Arthur had looked for him in his entire Kingdom, during the following months. But Emrys had disappeared. No one could remember seeing the old sorcerer, and every knight came back to Camelot empty handed from their search parties. Arthur was getting more and more impatient to find that wizard.
"He is dangerous Merlin. So much power! He can, and will, kill us all! I cannot let this happen. I have to protect Camelot!" How many times did Merlin hear his King and friend say that to him in one of his outburst? He couldn't keep score. In his attempt to save Arthur, and to show him what magic was really about, he managed to make his King even more scared; and that fear was somewhat justified. Magic had taken all the members of his family or had changed them so completely that they were impossible to recognize.
Morgana had a whole army of Saxons and magicians following her, but Emrys had come and all that power had been wiped out. No one was left standing save for Arthur's army. One man against a multitude, and the loner had won. Merlin had shown his full powers, and Arthur only saw the possible dangers of such enormous magic. That's why Arthur had kept on looking for him to protect his people, as he always did.
But one day, Arthur finally stopped searching. Well, Arthur didn't wake up one day saying that he wanted to stop the search. It was a transition. Every time his knights were coming back with no leads Arthur was angry, of course, but in the end he resigned himself. Emrys would never be found and he would never reappear; and Arthur had better things to do than looking for a ghost.
Gwen was pregnant at last. Merlin could still remember how relieved he was when his friend finally stopped searching for Emrys. He knew that Arthur only stopped because of Emyr, but he still hoped that at some level it was also because Arthur had realized that Emrys wasn't going to do anything against him.
Arthur had not wanted the Prince to be lost in his paranoia and fears (though he would never admit out loud that magic scared him). So he controlled himself and stopped his open war against magic, magicians and all things related to it. He claimed that as long as magic was not being used, everyone was allowed in his Kingdom.
Despite his poor example of a father, Arthur became an excellent one. During the first few years, Arthur would often postpone his councils to go check on Gwen and his little Prince. He always took the time to play with Emyr and to show how much he loved him. Merlin also remembered the time when Arthur tried to find an 'incompetent' servant such as himself so his son wouldn't be too… arrogant, but failed. There was only one Merlin, and he was his; and Arthur didn't really like to share. So now the Prince was turning 18, and was just like Arthur the first time Merlin met him.
Yes, Merlin had been naïve when he thought that saving Arthur with magic would allow him to see what magic was really about. He had been a fool when he thought that Arthur would understand who he was and accept him. But, that never happened, and he knew that he couldn't reveal himself now. Not after 20 years past Camlann. Not now that all the Kingdoms were united in the great Albion, the sole purpose of his existence. And especially, not after almost 30 years of friendship. If showing what, or who he was, had been a bad idea back then; it was almost a suicidal one now. Merlin could- with no doubt, imagine the feeling of betrayal in Arthur's eyes as he understood what Merlin was. A sorcerer and a liar; and the rejection that would inevitably follow. Arthur and he were friends, so maybe he would be exiled. Or maybe executed with Excalibur immediately for fooling the King into believing they were really friends. No, Merlin could definitely never tell Arthur who he was!
So Merlin was doing what he had always done since he entered Camelot: making sure that the whole royal family was safe. And even if it was time of peace, there was still a lot of work. The Prince had a natural tendency to get into trouble: he was Arthur's son after all. Merlin was protecting Arthur, Gwen, Emyr, Camelot and Albion; and he was thanking his powers for that. Without magic Arthur would have been killed even before becoming King!
To make his guilt worse; Merlin had cut ties with his mentor. The great dragon was still hoping to see magic being returned to this land; but Merlin felt himself to be so weak that he didn't even dare to tell him how much of a coward he was… Kilgharrah was not stupid, though. He probably already knew that Merlin would live out his whole life hiding his secret, and taking it to the grave. But Kilgharrah had had a vision, a vision of Albion with magic, in this life, and last time they spoke, he had said that it was not too late.
Another day started in Camelot. As the sun rose, Emyr growled and buried his face in his pillow. He hated the sun that tried to force him to wake up every single morning. He was the future King of Albion, why couldn't that stupid sun bend to his desires like everyone else? Annoyed, he heard his father's servant placing breakfast on his table and getting closer to his bed. That man was as old as his father and was still single- he just couldn't figure out why. Something was wrong with him. He couldn't quite say what it was. Yet every morning, when Merlin woke him up with such a look of tenderness and pride, he dared not to think down that path.
It was only few minutes later, that the Prince was up and eating in peace. That's when he resumed his fuming thoughts. Thoughts such as the fact that every one in this stupid castle only saw in him- the Son of Arthur, the best King that ever was in Albion. Because, let's face it, even if his father didn't allow magic, he was not on a crusade to kill every living magician anymore. As long as they were quiet and no one knew about them, they were safe.
Emyr was more like his grandfather in this regard. He thought Arthur was a little weak. Don't get him wrong; he loved his mother and father. But he never understood why his father had to take him in his arms to show his affection. That was the role of women- or Merlin, men were supposed to be tough. He also didn't understand why his father had to pity the ones that were accused of sorcery. Sorcery had destroyed his whole family and threatened his people more than once. Instead of keeping up to his grandfather's life work, his father had decided to 'listen to his heart' and forgive.
The Prince raised his head and saw Merlin observing him from the side. Merlin: that was another thing that was bothering him. How could a servant have so much weight in the decisions of the King? Merlin was not efficient; he was incapable of being on time- even after all these years. He wasn't very bright and was very clumsy; and he always seemed to be hiding something. No definitely, something was wrong with Merlin. When he'll become King, useless servants would either be fired or killed. He would start with Merlin and this annoying habit of waking him up.
He heard a small knock at the door, and that was Merlin's cue to leave. A new servant, that would probably be as dull as the others, entered the room and introduced themselves. He knew that waking him up wasn't really that easy, but he never understood why so many servants were leaving his service like that. If and only if, this new servant stayed more that a week, he would remember his name… No, her name. A woman, this was an interesting change. This was the first woman he had as a servant since his nurse. He was at that age where women started to become interesting, and he wasn't sure that having a woman as a servant was a good idea.
Then, he looked up to her face, and… Nope, her being a woman was not going to be a problem. She was so old, and time hadn't really been kind to her. A thought suddenly crossed his mind: maybe Merlin finally got a wife and asked Arthur to find her a position in the castle. He tried to imagine both of them together and repressed a laugh. Now he was in a good mood!
When his breakfast was finally over, he shamefully remembered his previous thoughts and groaned. After all these years, after every breakfast, as far as he could remember, he was taken aback by how horrid he was in the morning. He so was not a morning person! Merlin was the only servant who was never afraid of him. And he respected him somehow. True he had his flaws, and they were countless, but whenever the Prince needed someone, Merlin was the first name that popped into his head. Merlin never treated him as the King's son, but as a friend's son, or even a friend. Yes, to Emyr, Merlin was family in all but blood. Like a wise uncle- or rather a very attentive aunt. But still, every time he came to wake him up, Emyr wanted to kill the poor man. And who could blame him, really? He was always getting up to go see the knights, train with them and hear them say how brave and good his was, when most of them were hiding their strength in fear of hurting him. In the times of peace, they all thought it was not necessary to fight to all the extent of their capacity.
The Prince was good with a sword, but he couldn't really know that for sure. In these times of peace, there was no need to prove oneself. He had no army to lead, no expedition to make nor any quest to pursue. He had never had to do that because his father had made sure that he would grow up in a safe Kingdom. At his age, his father was already leading an army. The army of Camelot was fighting against magic and protecting her people. At the same age, his father had already accomplished so much! But him? He was still doing his classes. But to be honest, military accomplishments wasn't what he wanted the most.
No, if he was being completely honest, what he wanted the most- even more than sleeping- was a friend as good and as loyal as Merlin was to his parents. But that would never happen because everyone knew who he was. Merlin had known who Arthur had been when their friendship started of course, but Merlin was Merlin and never cared to sugar coat his thoughts. Yes, only Merlin or someone like him could be so truthful: all the others were just pretending to be friends with him to earn the favors of the royal family.
That's when he realized that, he had given up on being nice, to everyone but his parents and Merlin. Merlin- the only honest person in his surroundings. The only person with no agenda and no secrets from him. Merlin: the only person who was not afraid or intimidated by his title. Merlin; who had encouraged and supported his father for the biggest part of his life. Being a Prince had always meant being lonely… but no one ever saw how hard this was…
Emyr was bored. He was in the middle of a training session, and he was BORED! This was not something that was supposed to happen. In the middle of training, he really understood why his father had once chosen to enter a tourney secretly. As usual, the knights were waiting for him to leave before starting their real training. He was the only heir to the throne, so everyone thought that he was made of… spun glass! They all thought that he would break at the slightest blow. And it was not true. He was capable of defending himself, if given a chance… probably! How would he know, he never found himself in that situation! But he was following the proper training like everyone else!
He swore that one day, he would prove himself. And when he'll be done, he'll enter a tourney and show to everyone how much of a knight he was! What kind of King he would become. But in the mean time he decided to resume one of his favorite games.
The game was to lower his skill level… But even when he was fighting like a beginner, he always won! The hypocrisy of the situation, of the knights made him even lonelier and sick. In the middle of an attack, he dropped his sword to the ground and immediately his opponent did the same. Finally after 18 years, the Prince decided to yell. He yelled at the knights for their stupidity, their pity and when his heart was finally free of its burden, he left and went to the lower town.
As he looked back, he felt ashamed for his actions and compared himself to a girl- even Merlin wouldn't behave like that. After this, the King probably wouldn't show his love for him. And Merlin would never, ever look at him with that pride in his eyes. But that was nothing compared to the shock he could see in the other knights' eyes.
Deryn finally entered the great city of Camelot after a week of travelling. And the city was really, really big- no wonder it was the capital. It was also very loud and so full of life. Being from a small village, she was not used to it. It was impossible for her not to be taken in into the whirlpool of life that surrounded her.
She followed the flow of people that was surrounding her and ended up close to the castle. She was at the foot of the wall. A wall that was so tall that it made her feel insignificant, just like a bug. A small, insignificant bug crushed by the majestic building, that's exactly what she was. Her head went blank all of a sudden, and she felt dizzy. She was about to faint. How great was that! She stumbled to the wall trying to avoid the unavoidable. But it didn't work out so well.
She felt herself falling, but the hard ground never hit her. Instead, two strong arms caught her and placed her safely at the side of the street. The arms left her for a few moments, and then came back with food and water. She smiled uncertainly and then took both. She hadn't eaten for days and was literally starving. It was only when she finished eating that she remembered she had no money to give to the nice arms that saved her.
She looked up to say how sorry she was, when she noticed that it was a knight. She flinched. What was a knight doing here? And why did he save her? It made no sense. In her village, she had learnt the hard way that knights were arrogant and bullies. Maybe she was wrong, she would never judge anyone on what they were. After all, she was a magician, coming to Camelot despite its laws.
"Thank you," she croaked. She cleared her throat once or twice, drank a bit more of the water before trying again. "Thank you. You probably saved me with that food, but I don't have any money to pay you back. I mean, I just got here and I used all my money to pay for the horse, and it's just… I hadn't eaten for several days, and I was starving, and I fainted, and you caught me and you paid for my food and now, now … I'm so sorry. I just can't repay you right now. But you're a knight, right? So, maybe you can wait a bit? Oh no, that's not right! I should pay my debts immediately. (She continued to babble about god knows what, until) But I can't... And … what was I saying again?"
She finally managed to stop that continuous flow of words coming out of her mouth! She wanted to thank him and she got all confused by the look in those blue eyes that she just started talking and talking and talking some more. She shook her head and decided to start over.
"Alright, fresh start? I'm Deryn. Thank you for your help and the food. I just can't repay you right now, but I'll find a way, I swear."
That was short, and it seemed better than her first attempt. She smiled and waited for a reply.
He was furious! In all his life, he had never been so angry. Being a knight was supposed to be about honor, and there was none in the actions of his fellow knights. He was exiting the castle when he saw a woman trying to reach the wall. She wasn't walking straight and seemed about to fall; and the worst part was that no one seemed to care.
He walked towards her and reached just in time to catch her as she fell. After placing her against the wall, he went to buy some food and water. The first thing she did when she woke was to throw herself at the food. It was only after she had gobbled up the fare that she started panicking. She talked a lot, but he was not listening- he was hypnotized by her eyes and she concluded by saying "fresh start?"
Fresh start? That idea was interesting. She didn't seem to know who he was. So maybe, just maybe, she too could be his fresh start. In a split of a second he decided to do something he had never done before- lie.
"I'm Em…. Emmet. And don't worry about that. Yes, I'm a knight and helping others is … well it's what I do; I mean it's in the knights' code. So really don't worry!"
He lied! He couldn't believe it. He just lied and why? Just because he was angry, and needed to talk without care of his station! It was ridiculous. He was the worst person alive. Oh! What if his father ever came to know that? He would be the shame of all of Camelot. Even if he was not, it would seem to his father that he was ashamed of who he was. Maybe it wasn't too late. Maybe he could fix this. It would be easy, just say "I'm Emyr."- Come on, you can do it! He encouraged himself.
He opened his mouth, but it was she who said:
"Well, that's very nice of you. I wasn't expecting the journey to be so long, and I ran out of money 3 days back, so I had to make do. Though I couldn't hunt you see, just the idea of killing those poor animals… Not that I don't understand! It's just… it's not for me."
The Prince didn't know how to react. The girl was so spontaneous- despite her constant babbling she was so refreshing. And it was so nice to not be the Prince, for once, that he thought of letting this go. Just for a moment; and only with her.
"Emmet? I have a question for you. Do you know where I could find a place to work? Oh and an inn?"
There was always work in the castle. That was an appealing idea, until he realized that his secret would be out immediately. Think Emyr he told himself. If memory served him well, then there was an inn not too far that needed a serving girl. It could be a starting point for her.
"There is this inn called The Three Boars, they are looking for a serving girl. You could ask to stay there in exchange for work for a few days."
Days were going by, no flying by actually. Emyr had never had a friend before- well not a real one at least, and Deryn was like a breath of fresh air- so brutally honest. She turned the arrogant man that he was- a man who was so convinced in his ways- into a better man; and all that in a span of 3 weeks! How did she do that? He didn't understand how she managed to change him that much, even though he could remember every single moment they had shared together.
He could remember their second encounter vividly. He had come to see her at the inn the very next day. But Deryn had met him with suspicion; even more, when the innkeeper readily allowed her to take a break. She left with him but things were tense between them, not at all like what they had been the day before. Emyr was about to ask why her behavior had changed so radically, when she shouted in the middle of the street scaring the crowd- "I really am grateful, and I will pay you back, I swear. So please just don't do that." He remembered what she was like at that moment. She was shaking, afraid, and she didn't even want to look at him in the eyes.
"Deryn, I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about," he declared, confused. She stepped away from him as he tried to touch her. She seemed terrorized, and it hurt him more than he could say, "I don't want to hurt you. I just… I just wanted to talk to you… I will leave if you don't want to see me." His heart was heavy as he said those words. He turned away and heard a loud sigh:
"You're a strange knight, you know that? Come on, we can talk… but that will be all that we do!"
He remembered turning around to see her tentative smile. Her small crooked smile that made her look so beautiful. She was still scared of him a bit. Yet, she told him everything about her experiences with the other knights. Those stories made him understand what she thought he wanted from her! He had never felt so insulted in his life, but he didn't tell her that. Besides, she had plenty of stories to tell and they always took the Prince aback.
Like, when some bandits attacked a village close to hers, and the knights waited until the very last second to help them just because the villagers had refused to pay the 'extra tax'. Or about the time when she passed through a small village on the way to Camelot and saw some knights demand free food and board because they were there to 'protect them' and deserved some retribution for their efforts. She had lots of stories, and in all of those the only thing of interest for the knights was glory or personal profit. Even Gwaine had always kept the interest of the villagers before his!
After those first awkward moments, their friendship really started building up. And that smile he longed to see was always welcoming him now. She told him everything about her, how she grew up, where she grew up- not every memory of the time spent with her was tainted by her past bad experiences.
They had decided to go into the forest once (forest where he was currently waiting for her), and she had found a small river. Emyr had decided to impress her with his fisherman's skills, but after few attempts, he ended up empty handed. When he turned to her, she was laughing! She came upto him and pushed him in the stream before jumping in herself. They had played in water for hours before she had to leave for work. And yes, she had left him in the water all of a sudden! "Emmet, I have to go now, see you tomorrow!" and she was gone.
He also remembered the conversation they had had about his life. He had to change the truth a bit because he couldn't face the fact that he was a liar and that he had lied to his only friend. But now that he was thinking about it, then might have been the right time to tell her the truth! She had asked plenty of questions as they were touring the capital. Question like- "Where do you train?" "Where do you go after training?" "Why haven't I met any of your friends?" And every time, he eluded them.
He remembered the day before- he had found her, fighting with a knight that came to take the tax. He was late, and he had to rush to get to their meeting point. But when he arrived, he found the people had formed a circle and were cheering for her. She was yelling all sorts of things to a knight. She was yelling that Sir Derek was the shame of Camelot for what he was doing, and that he deserved to have this sword of his stuck up in his … well you get the idea. That day was the first time he felt sorry for a knight.
That's when he decided; first he was going to tell her the truth as soon as possible. Second, despite the fact that he hated being separated from his sword he would not take it with him. Deryn hated swords, but he wasn't sure that after realizing she had been lied to for 3 weeks, she wouldn't renounce her hatred for the 5 minutes necessary to kill him!
So as the days flew by, Deryn opened Emyr's eyes to so many things.
His father was a good King; there was no doubt about that. But there were still some major issues in Albion.
First, in these times of peace, knights were bored (just like him) and were oppressing the people. It wasn't that bad, but the values that his father and the older knights lived by were not their first priority anymore. There were no real actions, but the threats like "if we're not there, who will protect you from brigands?" were apparently very common nowadays. The knights made his people live in fear! They were not the protectors that his father described, because years of peace made them impatient to prove their worth. They couldn't prove themselves on battlefields or in fights (except for tourneys), so they had found another way: making people pay for their protection.
Which led him to problem number 2- his people were poor. Well, obviously poorer than him, but also poorer than he expected. With the taxes for the King and the bribes for knights' protection, they were left with almost nothing for themselves. His people were suffering, despite all his father's efforts. Emyr wanted to bring that to his father's attention. But then he would have had to explain how he found out everything. And that was problem number 3.
How to tell Deryn that he lied to her? He could envision just how well that would go- Deryn, you know when we met 3 weeks ago, I sort of lied to you. Oh nothing major, I'm not just a knight but also the King's son. As if this conversation could ever bode well! Deryn would kill him in less than a minute; and he would have deserved it!
He was in the forest outside the city, waiting for her and trying to sort things out in his head, when the bandits came. He had simple clothes on and since he was supposed to meet Deryn, he had carried no sword. Swords had always made the young girl uncomfortable; and moreover he didn't want to give her any ideas for after his revelation! So he had absolutely no way of defending himself. He didn't know what to do. He couldn't come forward and announce who he was in case Deryn arrived, and he couldn't run away like a coward- he hated honor!
He was still weighing his options when it all happened at once. One second the bandits were on to him; and the next one they were flying in the air: on their way to meet the trees. That too not in a gentle way, they were actually smashed against the trees. All his enemies were on the floor, when he heard a panicked voice say:
"Oh no! Emmet? Emmet, are you ok? Did I get there in time? Please answer me!"
Deryn looked at him, and her panic increased. What did she see in his eyes to make her cry like that? She was his friend. His first and only friend. And she just saved him… Saved him with magic. He was in shock and it was that shock that scarred her. SHE WAS USING MAGIC!
"I wanted to tell you. I wanted to meet you here to show you! I'm so sorry. I never thought… Please… please, don't hate me. Please give me a chance to show you, to tell you, to explain everything…"
His first thought was to arrest her. That's what he was supposed to do. He was the King's son, magic was banned and she had fooled him all those weeks. But the plea in her voice made him look at her. Really look at her. In her eyes, he was seeing the same plea, the same desperation that he heard in her voice. She really wanted to tell him, she hated lying to him, she was as desperate as he was a few minutes ago. So against all his instincts, he decided to tell her…
"Yes."
That word came as liberation for Deryn. When she had looked in his eyes, she could see his fears. In Camelot magic was a taboo and everyone was convinced that it was the work of demons. She had hesitated a lot before deciding to reveal her secret to Emyr. He was a knight but he also was her friend, and he had saved her, found her a roof and a job.
She let go an exasperated sigh. Her plan was to show him gently, and instead of that she had to show a violent release of her powers when she blew those bandits away from him. She thought faster than ever before to come up with another plan. And then, an idea was formed in her mind. It was the only possible way.
"I know it's a lot to ask, but I need you to trust me. I'm going to show you. I want to show you what magic really is and what it means to me. Because it's so much more than what you know. Yes, it can be used to hurt others, but it can also be used to help, to protect, to heal… Magic is just a force, it's the hearts of men that are easily corrupted."
She looked at him and he was still hesitant but there was also something in his eyes. His resolution, he trusted her. Despite everything that just happened, he still trusted her. He was willing to listen to her and to let her show him.
"Give me your hand. I'm going to make you feel magic. My magic, my heart." In front of his hesitation, she added: "Both are the same. You can't dissociate magic from the heart. It's what you feel that makes you do what you do."
When he took her hand, she opened up. She opened entirely to her magic. She let the feelings of being complete, and of love fill her completely. She then extended her sensations to the man standing beside her, holding her hand. She took him within her, within her magic.
After the magical fusion that occurred, he could feel her, of course, but she could also feel him. She could feel his hesitations, his fears at first, and when he met her at the center of magic, she felt every bit of apprehension he had breaking into pieces. She knew she had made it, she knew she was right to trust him.
When he entered her magic, he had been so convinced he was right when he thought magic was evil. But after feeling what she felt, and how loving magic was when it was hers, he had no other choice but to see the world through different eyes. When he had met her several weeks back, he had never thought that a girl like her could open his eyes. But here he was, all preconceived ideas shattering around him.
Knights, too arrogant and too desperate to prove themselves to actually help the people. His people, scared and poor and hungry and … oh so many things needed to change for them! And magic? It was NOT the terrifying thing he always thought it was. He understood why his father, his mother and everyone were so sure they were right, but now he knew.
Now that he knew the truth, he decided that from now on one of his goals would be to change the laws regarding magic! His first instincts had been not to listen to the witch. But he couldn't begin to say how proud he was of himself to have trusted Deryn. Deryn: who had opened her heart to him and for the first time in his life, he had a friend. A real friend and he wanted to protect her. He would protect her, no matter what- even from his father. Now she could never know he was the Prince.
But it was when they were going back to Camelot that hell broke loose…
They were talking and laughing. Deryn clearly relieved of his decision to keep her secret. But then the guards came up to them and took her. The guards, HIS guards took HIS friend away from him. And in the background, he could see the knights he had been training with, with eyes filled with anticipation. They must have seen them! Or rather, they saw her using magic and ran to his father to announce the news.
Emyr panicked. He needed to protect his friend. But Deryn had already been taken in front of the King. After few moments of hesitation, he started running to the castle. The servants told him that the trial had already started. But the Prince couldn't care less. His friend was about to be executed, or at least sentenced to death. He couldn't let that happen.
He opened the door of the throne room in a hurry, and the sound of the doors hitting the stone wall echoed throughout the room. He could see every pair of eyes turn to him, but the faint anger he saw in them changed instantly when they realized who had made that dramatic entrance. The Prince walked to his father.
Deryn was the last one to see him. She was on the floor, but she didn't seem injured. Relieved, he passed her by and went straight to his father. He did his best not to ignore his friend. So when he was at her side, he let a small smile grace his lips. He wanted to reassure her.
The King was sentencing her to death. She knew that Emmett wasn't the one who had informed the King against her. He was her friend, and she trusted him. He would never lie to her. Also, he never had the chance to leave her side after her coming out. She was so scared, she didn't want to die, and there was someone she wanted to meet first! The whole reason why she had come to Camelot in the first place. If only she had started her searches instead of talking with Emmet every time she had the chance!
Just as the sentence fell, the doors of the room opened and slammed against the walls. Someone was here, but why? To see the sorceress being sentenced to death? To blame her for some things and hurry her death? Or was it an ally? Emmet was a knight, but he wouldn't dare to enter the room in the middle of a session like this, right?
Wrong! It was Emmet. Why was he even here? If the King found out he knew about her, he could get exiled: even if he had only known for a couple of hours. He didn't hesitate when he walked straight to the King. He spared a smile to her, but then turned to King Arthur. And that's when it hit her. Their eyes! They had the exact same eyes, and with the Queen standing next to the King… That couldn't be true! She had revealed her magic to the Prince.
Panic overwhelmed her. She felt tears invading her eyes, and she had to struggle to keep them from falling. She would not cry!
"Father. You can't sentence her to die."
Deryn raised her head. She must have misheard him! She looked at him; he was fighting for her. He wanted her to be released at once. He explained to his father a lot of things, including what magic really was. The other knights fled the second the Prince started to say how great magic was. And now, the only people in the room were the King, the Queen, the Prince, a servant and herself.
Yet things were still not going so well for her. The King was convinced she had casted a spell on the Prince. And they got even worse, when the Prince running out of ideas finally yelled:
"She's my friend. She's my ONLY friend. Father, you don't understand, she's my Merlin!"
The King stopped and looked with horror at his son. Emyr placed his hands on his mouth, but it was too late. The King stood up, looked down at his son, and then yelled to the guards that were still waiting outside; to take the witch to the dungeon until her execution tonight, and the Prince to his room. He also added that the Prince was not to leave his room until after the witch was dead.
The last thought of Deryn before the guards knocked her out was "at least you tried, Emyr."
She woke up and looked around. She was in a cell. She could escape probably, but then what would happen to Emyr? After a few moments, she stood up and walked to the window, the only place from where she could see what was happening outside. She couldn't stop the shiver that shook her when she saw the stake that the knights were prepping for her.
That's when she heard a noise. She went back to the door of the cell. A servant was there. It was the same one who had stood beside the King as he was sentencing her to burn for her sins. Her sins? She wouldn't really call being born with magic a sin, but all of Camelot did, so… She looked up at him. Gone was the subservient person who had stood behind the King. Instead, this man- though burdened by grief, had an air of confidence around him. This puzzled her.
"Emyr asked me to help you. If you were to burn tomorrow, I would help you escape during the night, but you will be burned as soon as the stake is up. I'm sorry, there's nothing I can do. You'll need to use your magic to get out of here! So just do it!" he pleaded.
This man, she had never seen before wanted her to run? The idea had crossed her mind, but after thinking it through she realized that running away would make her pose as a coward and confirm her non-existing guilt. Worse, it could also get Emyr into trouble. After everything her friend had done for her, she could only accept her fate or try to change the King's mind. Those were her only options.
"No! I will not run away. Do you hear me? If you want to help me, we will have to find another way!"
"Another way? I'm sorry, but the King will not listen anyone on that specific matter!"
"You can't know that! Someone needs to convince him that what magic does only depends on the user."
"And how would I do that? He listens to me, all right, but I can't influence him on that topic. Believe me, I have tried."
"Well you haven't tried hard enough, obviously! Besides, I never said it had to be you!"
"Well. I talked to him about magic several times. But he is stubborn, and even if he trusts me... I just can't fight with him about that. He is my friend…" his voice broke down.
His friend?
"You're Merlin!" she gasped.
She came to that conclusion when she remembered what Emyr had said. She's my Merlin. Translation: she is my friend. Merlin was there in front of her, and there were so many things she wanted to tell him. She could talk about magic, about Emrys, about the prophecy and how he had failed his kin, or even some more personal things but this was not the place, nor the time. So she settled for this.
"If you are indeed his friend, then talk to him, because it's the only thing that can save me right now. I will not escape and leave this Kingdom. This is where I was born, it's where I grew up, and I love it! And I'm not ashamed of who I am, or too scared to say it to my friends."
Merlin stepped back slowly at first and a bit faster at the end of her sentence. Then he touched the wall, and as if it was a signal, turned around and started running. A few seconds after he disappeared behind the door, he came back to say:
"You're right, you shouldn't be ashamed. And Arthur will listen to me. I promise."
He smiled and left.
Deryn turned back to the window and watched as the knights kept on piling up the logs. Burning seemed like one of the worst way of dying, but she would not leave. Not now, not like that. She couldn't say how long she stood there, watching at the window. But as the sun was going down the horizon, the knights came to take her… take her to her certain death.
Emyr had no idea of what was going on outside of his room. He remembered asking Merlin to do something, but he felt sorry for the poor servant. The only true friend his father ever had. He was sitting at the window, and was watching the so-called knights prep the stake to burn his friend.
He smiled and thought, "I have a sorceress as my first friend! She can escape."
Destiny was a weird thing. To Merlin, destiny was Arthur, or to be more accurate, it was the creation of Albion and the right to use magic again. But, to be honest at this point, it was not something that was going to happen any time soon. Or so he had thought.
When he talked to Deryn, he realized something. As the years went by, he became afraid and ashamed of who he was. When there was absolutely no reason, all he ever did was protect his friends. He was so used to being Arthur's shadow that he forgot that there were other born-magicians who couldn't afford him to lose any more time. He had failed them all through these years. He failed them because he was afraid of the rejection and betrayal he might read in Arthur's eyes. Dying didn't scare him, losing Arthur did.
With time, the arrogant Prince became a slightly less arrogant but fair King. And he became his friend. Arthur didn't know his magical-self, but aside from that he knew Merlin as well as Merlin knew himself. His destiny was to rehabilitate magic. And it was the words of that child, no to be fair teenager- she didn't look a day over 15! That brought him back to reality and to his duties toward his kin.
He ran to find Arthur. He needed to talk to him in a place where the King wouldn't call the guards to arrest him and throw him in jail. Or, he could just soundproof the room; that was another solution. Any room would be fine as long as they were alone and that no sound could get out. He found the King in his bedroom, talking with Gwen- then again talking was undermining reality, they were arguing. Merlin decided to listen a bit before interrupting. If Arthur was angry, it would be worse, but he had to do it today. He had to do it before Deryn died.
"I will never forgive you for this Arthur."
The Queen turned her back to the King. Then hesitated when she saw Merlin (most of the time Merlin was the only support for the Queen against her boar headed husband and vice-versa, sometimes she felt that both of them were Arthur's wives), and decided to turn back and add (probably for Merlin's sole benefit). "Emyr was very clear, she SAVED his life. He wants her safe, so don't kill her, exile her if you must!"
That's when Merlin decided to interrupt. As always, he was on Gwen's side, well almost.
"Or you could simply allow magic with some restriction on its usage."
He said as he left the shadows and walked into the room. Two pairs of eyes looked at him. Arthur was horrified by the idea, but Gwen seemed interested by what Merlin had to say. It was Merlin who told Arthur not to rehabilitate the Old Religion in the first place- right before Mordred betrayed him, so something must have changed since then.
"Merlin, magic took everyone away from me! My mother, my father, Morgana, and it threatened Albion and Camelot more than once. It almost killed all of us so many times! And it's what was keeping Gwen from having a child! How can you say that?"
"That's not true, not everyone left you. Gwen is still here, even magic couldn't separate you. And magic saved you more than once, Sire!"
When Arthur replied, "Mphhh, name one". Merlin started the long list of his accomplishments. Every time he was adding one to the list, Arthur's eyes were opening wider. But the truth hit Gwen first. She almost yelled, when she said, "That's why the lamia couldn't control you! Merlin, you're a sorcerer!"
Arthur jumped away from Merlin as if he was dangerous and started calling for help. But no one came, Merlin had enchanted the room. Gwen was trying to calm Arthur down.
"Arthur. I have been your servant for almost 30 years, including in these times of peace. Now you feel betrayed and you're stepping away from me, but if I wanted to hurt you, kill you or take your Kingdom, I could already have done it! Instead of that, I saved you, your father and Camelot countless times. You know me. And you know you can trust me, magic or not. I am your friend! Arthur, look at me, please! All I want is one chance to show you the only side of me I kept hidden from you for 30 years. I just want a chance to show you what magic really is: a force coming from our hearts. I just want a chance to show you the other side of magic. After that, you can decide to do what you think is best. If you want to kill me, then so be it… I know that all your life you only saw evil in magic, but believe me when I say that I will never do anything against you or Albion. All these years I supported you and helped you, not only with my words but also with my magic. You are no fool, Arthur, and you never were. I hid who I was because as much as I hated myself for keeping this a secret from you, I knew that it was not the right time to tell you the truth- not when every other magic user you met seemed to want to kill you. My kind never allowed you the opportunity to see the good in magic and given that scene; I was a coward, too scared to lose a friend. But please, let me show you what I have done. It will be the last favor I ask of you…"
She knew that the King was supposed to say a few words before her death, but she never expected those words to be in the throne room. She thought he would say those words in front of his people, in front of the stake, or maybe even while she was on it. She could see it perfectly: "Here is a witch. She tried to kill the Prince. She will burn for that!"
She entered the room, and was brought in front of the King, for the second time that day. She looked all around and to her surprise found the reassuring face of Emyr. When she saw him, she locked her eyes to his, and she forgot everything else. In his eyes, she could see his anger, his sadness and … his support? He was silently asking her to be strong. He was trying to give her his strength to ease her pain. He was also silently begging her to save herself.
She finally realized that the King had addressed her and was now waiting for a reaction. How long had she been starring into Emyr's eyes? She shook her head and focused on the King. Was she allowed to ask him to repeat what he said? Probably not, but she was going to die anyway, so another offense was not really the issue here. She cleared her throat and said, "I'm sorry, Sire. I'm not sure I understood fully what you said. Could you repeat please?"
She saw the King sigh before saying, "I will summarize it for you. I said that you risked your life to save my son. For that you don't deserve to be punished."
She pinched her left hand to be sure this was real. She was hurting. It was real. The King was going to let her live. She squealed with joy.
The King smiled and shook his head at her actions.
"30 years ago a warlock entered my service and became my best friend, supporter, conscience and protector. From what the Prince has revealed to me; in the short time you have known each other, you have become the same to him. This leaves me to ask if you would enter his service so you can be, as my son has so eloquently put- His Merlin. Do you believe you can submit yourself to this cause?" Arthur asked grandly.
Deryn was speechless. But she gathered her wits and replied, "Sire, you honor me. But you are a hypocrite!"
The effect of her declaration was immediate. The knights drew their swords. The Queen smirked while Emyr burst out laughing. Merlin groaned and buried his face in his hands. Arthur's eyes widened as he gapped at her.
She hastened to explain, "You can't be fine with Merlin's and my magic, when my kind fear to be themselves in your Kingdom." There, she thought- that was much better.
Despite himself, Arthur smiled and drew himself up, "Deryn if you had been patient then you would have heard my further plans before calling me a hypocrite. As you have shown Emyr your magic; so has Merlin to me. I understand now that prosecuting people for what they possess and not for what they use their gifts for has been a grievous mistake by the rulers of this land. I intend to rectify this error and the coming weeks with Merlin, my council and even you if you choose to stay; I would like to bring back magic to these lands and truly create Albion for all."
Deryn could not believe what was happening! She wanted to jump and hug Emyr, and the King and Merlin! She was going to live. Magic was going to come back. Merlin had kept his word; he had talked to the King and made him change his outlook. She wasn't listening to the protests of the knights surrounding her. Delirious with joy and relief; she jumped on an impulse and threw herself at the King and hugged him.
"Thank you, Sire."
Then she turned to Merlin, still hugging the King, who didn't really know how to react to this- the more he saw of her, the more he likened her to a female version of Merlin- and said:
"You were right! He really does listen to you, father!"
She smiled, the biggest smile of her life. Grabbed Emyr, and then started running towards the exit. She had almost reached the doors, when she heard everyone yell "Merlin!"
She turned around to see a shocked King, a pleasantly surprised Queen and a bunch of clueless knights surrounding an unconscious Merlin who was lying flat on the ground!
This was only the beginning of her life, she came here to meet her father (she had not forgotten him, but maybe it would be better if he got over the shock before further contact), but in the end, she found more than that. She found a friend. She found freedom.