Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Stargate: Atlantis or any of it's characters. I'm just playing in their sandbox. All OCs (except one) are my fault, however.

Author's Note: So, about halfway through writing "Hands in the Darkness," I started this story. It took several weeks and the introduction of a phenomenal OC for me to get it off the ground, however. Sarah MacKenzie, the OC featured here, is not my creation. She originally appeared in pisces317's story "Return to Pegasus" and is used with her permission. Also, a huge thank you to theicemenace and pisces317 for the beta on this story. You have both made it much better than it was. :) As always, I hope everyone enjoys reading! Now, on with the story! ~lg

oOo

He woke slowly, becoming aware of one thing at a time. The first to penetrate his consciousness was an annoying hiss. It changed pitch every few seconds, and he tried to ignore it. Then, a soft beeping intruded with the hiss, irritating him even more. He tried to open his eyes, but his eyelids felt sealed to one another, almost as if he'd slept for an incredibly long time. As the sounds around him grew, he started feeling things.

Pain. Agony. His back and legs burned like nothing had ever burned before. And he lay on his back. Trying yet again to open his eyes, he managed a blurry glimpse of a screen before the weight of his eyelids became too much. He tried to focus, to concentrate on what had happened, but his bleary mind slipped way too easily into the darkness again.

A tug on his back, accompanied by sharp pain, pulled him out of the darkness. He drew in a deep breath, tasting the plastic that had been put in his mouth. He blinked, but his eyes never truly opened. He'd been turned while asleep, and he tried yet again to open his eyes. Once again, he saw blurry images, some of them moving around him.

A voice, seeming distant and almost like he was underwater, came from above him, and he tried to focus. Another voice intruded, both of them discussing something. Him? Perhaps. Or perhaps it was simply his condition. Which was? His mind finally started making connections, and he vaguely realized he must be in the hospital. But why? And why did it hurt to move anything? He tried, but the pain nearly rendered him unconscious.

The next time he woke, he was once again on his back. The tube had been removed from his mouth, and he felt a bit more like himself. Or so he thought. He couldn't know as it was very difficult to keep his eyes open. But he managed and found himself looking into blue-green eyes and a happy smile. The woman, brunette and seeming incredibly familiar, touched his shoulder, the one place it didn't hurt. He tried to smile at her, and he blinked three times before his eyes closed. Sorry, he tried to say. But he wasn't sure it ever made it out of his mouth. Just before he fully drifted to sleep, he heard her voice. Warm. Capable. And using his name. He smiled at her words.

You'll be fine, Carson. Just rest. We'll get you through this.

oOo

Elizabeth turned from the hospital bed to look at Jennifer Keller. "Is he. . .?"

Keller, the interim CMO, shrugged. "He's definitely stabilized, but I'm not certain what his prognosis will be. He took quite a blow to the head in that explosion, and our instruments can only tell us so much. He is waking from the coma, but that will take time."

"Time." Elizabeth nodded. "Thank you, Doctor." She turned to go.

"Dr. Weir." Keller's voice stopped her. "Why didn't you send him back to Earth after the explosion?"

Elizabeth looked at the man in the bed and shook her head. "I don't know." She narrowed her eyes. "He's a good friend to all of us, but. . . ."

And she couldn't explain her decision any more than that. Even with all of the Ancient technology on Atlantis, Carson should have been sent back to Earth for the months of medical care he'd require. Instead, she chose to have him put in an isolation room on Atlantis while his burns healed. Dr. Keller had done a fantastic job of keeping him alive and treating his wounds. Now that the risk of infection had passed, he'd been moved into the main infirmary where he was closer to medical staff. Sheppard visited daily, as did Rodney, Teyla, and Ronon. Radek made frequent trips, though it wasn't a daily thing for him. And Elizabeth also managed to get by for just a few moments. Keller had told them that people in comas may be able to hear what others are saying, but it hadn't been proven. So, each of Carson's visitors had filled him in on events after the explosion that left him in critical condition.

Elizabeth had come today to tell him that Sheppard and his team wouldn't be by to visit. They had a mission come up at the last possible moment, a visit to the Taranans to figure out why they'd ceased all communications with Atlantis. Before that, it was an underwater trip to the Ancient drilling platform. Elizabeth still shuddered when she thought of that disastrous mission. They'd almost lost the entire planet in that little incident. She'd told Carson of Teyla's experiences in the Wraith queen's mind, and she'd made sure he knew Teyla would be okay. Even in a coma, Carson Beckett was a medical doctor.

But today was different. Today, he opened his eyes when she touched his shoulder. He'd seemed confused, but the progress was good. At least he'd responded to her touch. Turning to Keller, she said, "Keep me informed."

Keller nodded and allowed her to leave the infirmary. Since the explosion that almost killed Carson, Elizabeth had read everything she could get her hands on about comas and coma patients. Contrary to popular entertainment, coma patients often woke slowly, becoming aware of more things as their minds healed. And Carson had taken quite a blow to the head. If he hadn't been in a coma already, Keller had stated she would have put him into one. It allowed his body to heal from the severe burns, as well as letting the medical team perform several skin grafts on the more badly damaged areas of Carson's body. Keller had said it was a miracle the man had even survived, much less survived without losing body parts. Elizabeth shuddered at the idea while reminding herself that he had pulled through by sheer willpower. Or so it seemed. While he may have some mobility issues due to scarring, Carson should be able to resume his duties as Chief of Medicine on Atlantis. She didn't want to consider the alternative: he could have died.

Satisfied with her visit to the infirmary, Elizabeth settled behind her desk and began looking over the most recent reports. She had piles of paperwork to wade through, but she took a moment to whisper a quick prayer of thanks for the progress Carson had made. Atlantis just wouldn't be the same without him.

oOo

Carson woke again to find someone beside his bed. A man with a round face and still-healing burns chatted about something, but Carson could make out nothing he said. The man was familiar, but he just couldn't seem to figure out who he was. The beeping of the heart monitor seemed loud in the silence.

The man glanced up and realized he was being watched. "Hey, Doc!" He moved, and Carson realized he was in a wheelchair. "Doc?"

Motion drew Carson's gaze as a pretty blonde woman rushed around the corner. She started to ask the man what was wrong, but she caught sight of Carson's eyes first. "Dr. Beckett." She smiled and moved to his side, leaving the man to watch in the background.

Carson moved to take her hand and ground his teeth together as pain erupted. He felt the tug of burns along his shoulders, not to mention the IV in his hand. "What 'appened?"

The woman smiled at him. "You were in an explosion. You're lucky to be alive."

An explosion? Flames surrounded him, and he dove behind the wall, covering his head with his arms. Carson blinked away the memory and tried to look at his hands. His arms seemed relatively burn-free. "How bad?"

The woman took a deep breath. "Bad." She shook her head. "You shouldn't have survived."

Carson shifted in his bed, cringing yet again when the burns along his back rubbed the white scrubs he wore. "How?"

"We don't know." She touched his shoulder. "You should rest."

Carson nodded but didn't give in to sleep. "How long. . .?"

"Three weeks." She met his eyes. "You've been in a coma for three weeks. We've done various surgeries, and you should heal quickly with the help of some recent discoveries by Dr. McKay. But it's going to take a while for you to be able to run this infirmary again."

Run the infirmary? What was she talking about? The machine beeped at him, recording the pulse of the man lying unconscious before him. "Making first incision now." His voice sounded strong, but he was shaking. If he didn't succeed with this operation, a man was dead. "I'm a doctor?"

The woman nodded. "Dr. Carson Beckett, Chief of Medicine on Atlantis. You've been in the Pegasus galaxy for three years."

"You?"

"Jennifer Keller, your assistant." She smiled. "Now, rest. As you recover, you'll remember more." She left something unsaid, but Carson's mind filled in the blanks. I hope.

The man in the wheelchair rolled to his side. "Hey, Doc, I know you're supposed to be sleeping. But I wanna say thanks. For, you know. . . ."

Carson nodded as he drifted back to sleep. He never got to ask the question rolling around in his head. Pegasus galaxy?

oOo

John Sheppard walked through the gate angry and ready to murder someone. And not just anyone. One particular person—Wraith—whatever. Michael had killed his men, and he needed revenge for that. From the look on Ronon's face, the Satedan also wanted revenge.

Elizabeth rushed down the stairs. "Are you alright?" She frowned as the gate closed down. "Where are the Marines?"

"Didn't make it." Sheppard barely resisted growling at her.

"What?" Elizabeth blinked.

Rodney moved forward, sporting a clumsy bandage on his face. "We barely made it ourselves. We had to commandeer a Wraith dart just to dial out."

John realized that Elizabeth would need more than that. "We ditched it on another planet. Didn't want to risk damaging the control room. Daedalus can pick it up later."

"What happened to the Taranans?"

Ronon, tired of the questions, growled. "They're dead—all of them." He stalked out of the room.

Elizabeth held up a hand. "Wait a minute. Lieutenant Negley sent a message saying they'd just relocated to a new settlement."

Teyla shook her head. "No. It was Michael. He sent the transmission. He's the one that killed the Taranans."

"Michael?"

John felt sorry for Elizabeth. She likely saw their frustration and weariness, not to mention that they needed to make the obligatory trip to the infirmary. He raised a hand. "We'll tell you about it in a minute, but first. Is the Daedalus here yet?"

"It's still a few days out." Elizabeth frowned. "Why?"

"We're gonna need it to make another stop on the way."

"Okay." Elizabeth fell into step with him and his team as they headed for the control room. "John."

He stopped and glared at her, trying to get across his message that this was important. "What?"

She met his eyes. "It's Carson." As his heart sank, she smiled slightly. "He's awake."

John exchanged glances with Rodney. "Go."

The physicist bolted from the control room, and John knew he'd be at the doc's bedside for the rest of the day. Rodney had taken Carson's injuries the hardest. The two had planned a fishing trip for their mandatory day off three weeks ago, but Rodney had bailed at the last moment. As a result, Carson had been on hand to remove an explosive tumor from Dr. James Watson. John knew it was only that the Marine bomb tech had the cooler with the tumor in it partially inside the containment unit that Carson had survived. He'd still been severely burned and put into a coma thanks to sliding into the wall head-first.

John turned to Elizabeth. "How is he?"

"He's good." She shrugged. "Dr. Keller says he's actually talking today, but it'll be a process. People in comas just don't wake up and resume their lives overnight. It takes some time."

"At least the worst of the burns are behind him."

"We hope." Elizabeth shook her head. "He may never be the same."

John fell silent, refusing to think about it. Carson had to survive. There was no other choice. Not after all they'd gone through. He turned his attention to the communique he'd prepared for the Daedalus, and planned to visit Carson later in the day. For now, he had work to do.

oOo

Carson blinked at the man at the foot of his bed. Messy brown hair that stood on end seemed to be the only non-military thing about him. He wore a black t-shirt and seemed to be struggling with with his emotions. Carson frowned. "I'm sorry. You are?"

"John." The man walked forward. "How are you, Doc?"

"Oh, you know." Carson looked around. "Dr. Keller says my memory should return in time, though maybe not totally."

John nodded. "Doc, I know you're not feeling the greatest, but it's good to see you awake."

"Aye." Carson blinked slowly, feeling sleep tugging at him. He'd awakened for the first time yesterday, and he somehow knew that it would take a week or more for him to stay awake longer than a few moments at a time. As before, however, flashes of the explosion came back to him. He'd remembered Dr. Watson, though he'd needed a reminder of the man's name, and working at the site of the first explosion. And Teyla. He clearly remembered the piece of shrapnel he'd removed from her side. His memories had a dream-like effect to them, feeling more like nightmares than dreams. But he saw their return as something good. Maybe it was.

As he lay there, his mind supplied yet another memory. John's full name. As a doctor, he knew that the human mind often shut down as a way to deal with injury, and a full "reboot," for lack of a better term, could take some time. "Colonel Sheppard, you are not responsible for this."

"I know." John gave him a slight grin. "You remembered my name."

"Aye." Carson also smiled. "It's coming back to me."

"Good." John frowned. "I'll let you rest." He turned to walk away.

"Colonel." Carson waited while he returned. "Rodney told me about today."

"He did?" John faced him again. "He should have kept his mouth shut."

"It's alright." Carson lifted a few fingers in his own way of waving away the concern. "I'm glad he did."

"You are?"

"Get some rest, Colonel."

This time, John's smile covered his face. "You got it, Doc."

Carson settled back on the bed, barely holding his eyes open until after the colonel disappeared. Then, he allowed them to close though he didn't drift to sleep immediately. It felt good to be alive, pain and all. Letting his head sink into his pillow, he reviewed the little bit that Dr. Keller had told him, as well as the information that was apparently hidden in his mind somewhere. His recovery would be difficult. But he would make it.

He drifted to sleep smiling and already planning his first reunion with his mum after this.

~TBC